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Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
174
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Posted - 2012.09.30 21:48:00 -
[1] - Quote
In a theme park, you start solo with a few dollars and build up an empire. You update your skills and technology to use better things. There are issues that you need to deal with in real time. You accumulate money to obscene levels until you get bored and tear it down and start again.
Eve is not a theme park and here is the proof...
In ROOKIE Eve, you start solo with a few dollars and have no idea what to do. You update your skills and technology but have no idea what that means. There are issues that you need to deal with in real time and you have no idea how to handle it. You can't accumulate money at any level.
In MINER Eve, you start solo with but a few dollars and stay solo. You update your skills and technology to match production targets in your spreadsheet. There are issues that you need to deal with in real time and you smack local and the forums when they happen. You accumulate money to obscene levels and keep accumulating, never actually knowing why.
In FREIGHTER Eve, you fly solo. Occasionally people fly along with you. But only for a short time. Your computer updates your overview to show flashy red but you don't see it, you're not there. There are issues that you seem oblivious to but you don't see it, you're not there. You accumulate frequent flyer points to obscene levels but you don't see it, you're not there.
In MISSIONER Eve, you start solo on L3's wondering why you get asploded. You update your skills to level 2 on everything because you don't know which one will stop you being scrammed. There are issues about using poorly fit battleships and gates that wont let you in. You accumulate combat logs and post your biggest numbers in your BIO, along with damage types.
In INCURSIONER Eve, you start as a MISSIONER and spend 3 days in local convincing the FC your fit is actually good. You update your skills and technology to be logi because they have enough guns already. There are issues about knowing where to be, when and more importantly, for how long. You accumulate messages saying fix my shields 'but your 200 kms away so you won't be 1-shotted.
In FW Eve, you start as an INCURSIONER and find a local system that looks busy. You update your wallet frequently with very large numbers. There are issues with lag because your updating your wallet so frequently. You accumulate very large numbers before going somewhere else to accumulate some more.
In PVP HIGHSEC Eve, you start with but a few dollars and build up a 10 man corp full of badboys. You update your skills and technology so you can wardec another 10 man corp full of badboys. You create your own disasters and issues in real time. You accumulate nothing at any level and and you just dock/undock all day.
In LOST SOUL Eve, you start with but a few dollars and build up your private collection of stuffz. You update your skills and technology to add to your private collection of stuffz. There are issues that you need to deal with to keep your private collection of stuffz, but you'll do it tomorrow. You've done everything there is to do and you are so bored you sit on the forum all day making stupid posts.
In GANKER Eve, you start shooting as soon as you're born into empire. You update your skills and technology just enough to do the gank. You are the issue. You accumulate KM's of Hulks, Mackinaws and freighters and you feel good about it. Rinse & Repeat.
In PIRATE Eve, you start with stolen money and a badboy attitude in lowsec. You update your sec status ocassionally so you can go shopping at Jita. You create no issues or disasters because no-one lives where you live. You accumulate KMS's of anyone stupid enough to try ratting or mining in space you fly in.
In 0.0 Eve, you start in a massive empire already won and staked out. You update your Jabber and TS in realtime to be ready to add to your collection of empty space. There are no issues because someone else deals with it. You accumulate nothing of value because THE MASTERS already have it all.
In CCP Eve, you try to head off the next Jita Riot You update the dev blogs frequently so you look busy. There are issues all the time but most are from people who don't GET Eve. You accumulate petitions not sure whether to call it an exploit or working as intended until you've done the maths on subs.
Which one are you? |
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ISD Dorrim Barstorlode
ISD Community Communications Liaisons
620
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:06:00 -
[2] - Quote
You forgot Wormhole EVE. ISD Dorrim Barstorlode Lt. Commander Community Communication Liasions (CCLs) Interstellar Services Department |
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Petrus Blackshell
Rifterlings Damu'Khonde
1680
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:08:00 -
[3] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote: In LOST SOUL Eve, you start with but a few dollars and build up your private collection of stuffz. You update your skills and technology to add to your private collection of stuffz. There are issues that you need to deal with to keep your private collection of stuffz, but you'll do it tomorrow. You've done everything there is to do and you are so bored you sit on the forum all day making stupid posts.
OP, is that you?! Rifterlings - small gang frigate PvP - low/nullsec operations, newbie-friendly, free ship program; Join today! www.rifterlings.com
Accidentally The Whole Frigate (blog) - Learning how to pew pew, one loss at a time - www.thewholefrigate.com |
Destru Kaneda
CTRL-Q Iron Oxide.
95
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:11:00 -
[4] - Quote
What is this I don't even. Music for robots, geeks, hackers, and nerds. Nerdiest homepage on the internet? |
James 315
Experimental Fun Times Corp
2862
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:11:00 -
[5] - Quote
Skipped all the highsec PvE steps.
Not seeing the highest evolution, BUMPER EVE, by the way.
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ MinerBumping.com -½-½-½-½-½-½-½-½-½-½The daily saga of the New Order's quest to conquer all highsec by bumping miners out of range. |
Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
175
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:12:00 -
[6] - Quote
ISD Dorrim Barstorlode wrote:You forgot Wormhole EVE. Dang.
In WORMHOLE Eve, you start by seeing what class it is, whose there and can you take 'em. You update your sites, WH list and belts every day. There are issues with local when you come back to empire because it's being used and that scares you. You think you'll accumulate heaps until someone says I want what he's having. |
Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
177
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:18:00 -
[7] - Quote
James 315 wrote:Skipped all the highsec PvE steps. Not seeing the highest evolution, BUMPER EVE, by the way. Sorry James.
In JAMES 315's Eve, you start by wondering why anyone would care. James 315 updates his posts and blogs because he's positive people DO care. There are issues with using biblical naming conventions in an internet spaceships game that BUMPS people. He accumulates likes by logging in with his bumping alts. |
Petrus Blackshell
Rifterlings Damu'Khonde
1680
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:22:00 -
[8] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote:James 315 wrote:Skipped all the highsec PvE steps. Not seeing the highest evolution, BUMPER EVE, by the way. Sorry James. In JAMES 315's Eve, you start by wondering why anyone would care. James 315 updates his posts and blogs because he's positive people DO care. There are issues with using biblical naming conventions in an internet spaceships game that BUMPS people. He thinks he's having an impact but no-one really cares. You should check his website. The miners who do care are hilarious. Rifterlings - small gang frigate PvP - low/nullsec operations, newbie-friendly, free ship program; Join today! www.rifterlings.com
Accidentally The Whole Frigate (blog) - Learning how to pew pew, one loss at a time - www.thewholefrigate.com |
Karl Hobb
Stellar Ore Refinery and Crematorium
631
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:24:00 -
[9] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote:In MINER Eve
In GANKER Eve You are the issue. FTFY
I play LOST SOUL EVE but I recently sold all my stuffs and cut down to a few SBs, one of which I promptly lost hilariously due to double-tapping the cloak hotkey. Nothing Found |
Jax Bederen
Dark Horse RM
198
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:34:00 -
[10] - Quote
Petrus Blackshell wrote:Touval Lysander wrote:James 315 wrote:Skipped all the highsec PvE steps. Not seeing the highest evolution, BUMPER EVE, by the way. Sorry James. In JAMES 315's Eve, you start by wondering why anyone would care. James 315 updates his posts and blogs because he's positive people DO care. There are issues with using biblical naming conventions in an internet spaceships game that BUMPS people. He thinks he's having an impact but no-one really cares. You should check his website. The miners who do care are hilarious.
That page gave me a weird vibe, sort of like in film someone walking into some obsessed mental cases room where the trivial is turned into utter detail and worship. Bit to much free time on he's hands . |
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Paul Oliver
Federal Navy Academy Gallente Federation
4459
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:38:00 -
[11] - Quote
Jax Bederen wrote:Petrus Blackshell wrote:Touval Lysander wrote:James 315 wrote:Skipped all the highsec PvE steps. Not seeing the highest evolution, BUMPER EVE, by the way. Sorry James. In JAMES 315's Eve, you start by wondering why anyone would care. James 315 updates his posts and blogs because he's positive people DO care. There are issues with using biblical naming conventions in an internet spaceships game that BUMPS people. He thinks he's having an impact but no-one really cares. You should check his website. The miners who do care are hilarious. That page gave me a weird vibe, sort of like in film someone walking into some obsessed mental cases room where the trivial is turned into utter detail and worship. Bit to much free time on he's hands . Checked out Jame 315's site once, had a most disagreeable self rightous vibe to it and felt like it was little more than a place for James 315 to gloat over the posts of others in some kind of lame attempt to 'expose' them and twist their words to justify his own hateful agenda.
Seems this game attracts people like that... Its good to be Gallente. |
Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
178
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:39:00 -
[12] - Quote
One more, can't leave these guys loose.
In BITTER VET Eve, you've as good as established your hero status, to yourself You update your skills every couple of days and log There are issues with everyone who has even one less SP than you You acummulate likes because you GET Eve (apparently) and everyone is wrong about wanthing to play their own game, and CCP doesn't know how to run a business, and 0.0 is broken, and lowsec is broken, and highsec is broken, and we should nerf everything (except what you fly/do) and pizza costs too much and did you know there's a great post in F&I that will be better for everyone and scamming is so yesterday and how much can I write in a paragraph before everyone says this is too hard to read and oh look, another NOOB with 5 less SP than me is daring to challenge my HISTORIC achievements and knowledge and wha? and where's the TLDR and keep poasting and THIS IS EVE and wha? go play WOW and................... |
Petrus Blackshell
Rifterlings Damu'Khonde
1683
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:40:00 -
[13] - Quote
Paul Oliver wrote:Checked out Jame 315's site once, had a most disagreeable self rightous vibe to it and felt like it was little more than a place for James 315 to gloat over the posts of others in some kind of lame attempt to 'expose' them and twist their words to justify his own hateful agenda.
Seems this game attracts people like that... You're clearly missing the RP, and the point. Rifterlings - small gang frigate PvP - low/nullsec operations, newbie-friendly, free ship program; Join today! www.rifterlings.com
Accidentally The Whole Frigate (blog) - Learning how to pew pew, one loss at a time - www.thewholefrigate.com |
Paul Oliver
Federal Navy Academy Gallente Federation
4459
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:42:00 -
[14] - Quote
Petrus Blackshell wrote:Paul Oliver wrote:Checked out Jame 315's site once, had a most disagreeable self rightous vibe to it and felt like it was little more than a place for James 315 to gloat over the posts of others in some kind of lame attempt to 'expose' them and twist their words to justify his own hateful agenda.
Seems this game attracts people like that... You're clearly missing the RP, and the point. You think hes that way for roleplaying purposes? Its good to be Gallente. |
Petrus Blackshell
Rifterlings Damu'Khonde
1683
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:45:00 -
[15] - Quote
Paul Oliver wrote:Petrus Blackshell wrote:Paul Oliver wrote:Checked out Jame 315's site once, had a most disagreeable self rightous vibe to it and felt like it was little more than a place for James 315 to gloat over the posts of others in some kind of lame attempt to 'expose' them and twist their words to justify his own hateful agenda.
Seems this game attracts people like that... You're clearly missing the RP, and the point. You think hes that way for roleplaying purposes? He'll never admit it (because he's RPing and needs to stay in character, of course), but he is one of the people who is successfully RPing in Eve in general. Rifterlings - small gang frigate PvP - low/nullsec operations, newbie-friendly, free ship program; Join today! www.rifterlings.com
Accidentally The Whole Frigate (blog) - Learning how to pew pew, one loss at a time - www.thewholefrigate.com |
Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
178
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:48:00 -
[16] - Quote
Petrus Blackshell wrote:Paul Oliver wrote:Petrus Blackshell wrote:Paul Oliver wrote:Checked out Jame 315's site once, had a most disagreeable self rightous vibe to it and felt like it was little more than a place for James 315 to gloat over the posts of others in some kind of lame attempt to 'expose' them and twist their words to justify his own hateful agenda.
Seems this game attracts people like that... You're clearly missing the RP, and the point. You think hes that way for roleplaying purposes? He'll never admit it (because he's RPing and needs to stay in character, of course), but he is one of the people who is successfully RPing in Eve in general. Guys guys.
This isn't titled "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" - please don't derail what the other 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% of Eve actually care about |
James Amril-Kesh
4S Corporation RAZOR Alliance
773
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Posted - 2012.09.30 22:55:00 -
[17] - Quote
In solo PVP EVE You win at everything, even when you lose http://themittani.com/features/local-problem A simple fix to the local intel problem |
Soi Mala
Whacky Waving Inflatable Flailing Arm Tubemen
177
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Posted - 2012.09.30 23:34:00 -
[18] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote:
In LOST SOUL Eve, you start with but a few dollars and build up your private collection of stuffz. You update your skills and technology to add to your private collection of stuffz. There are issues that you need to deal with to keep your private collection of stuffz, but you'll do it tomorrow. You've done everything there is to do and you are so bored you sit on the forum all day making stupid posts.
oh god, this is me :( |
Petrus Blackshell
Rifterlings Damu'Khonde
1688
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Posted - 2012.09.30 23:36:00 -
[19] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote:Petrus Blackshell wrote:Paul Oliver wrote:Petrus Blackshell wrote:Paul Oliver wrote:Checked out Jame 315's site once, had a most disagreeable self rightous vibe to it and felt like it was little more than a place for James 315 to gloat over the posts of others in some kind of lame attempt to 'expose' them and twist their words to justify his own hateful agenda.
Seems this game attracts people like that... You're clearly missing the RP, and the point. You think hes that way for roleplaying purposes? He'll never admit it (because he's RPing and needs to stay in character, of course), but he is one of the people who is successfully RPing in Eve in general. Guys guys. This isn't titled "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" - please don't derail what the other 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% of Eve actually care about TIL even most of James doesn't care about James. Rifterlings - small gang frigate PvP - low/nullsec operations, newbie-friendly, free ship program; Join today! www.rifterlings.com
Accidentally The Whole Frigate (blog) - Learning how to pew pew, one loss at a time - www.thewholefrigate.com |
Corina Jarr
Spazzoid Enterprises Purpose Built
1318
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Posted - 2012.10.01 01:39:00 -
[20] - Quote
I fit into more than one... or even 5 of those categories...
But really, I'm just a vulture. |
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James 315
Experimental Fun Times Corp
2862
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Posted - 2012.10.01 01:45:00 -
[21] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote:Guys guys. This isn't titled "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" - please don't derail what the other 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% of Eve actually care about Not what you intended, but... I can't stop thinking "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" would make a great title for something.
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ MinerBumping.com -½-½-½-½-½-½-½-½-½-½The daily saga of the New Order's quest to conquer all highsec by bumping miners out of range. |
Petrus Blackshell
Rifterlings Damu'Khonde
1696
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Posted - 2012.10.01 01:59:00 -
[22] - Quote
James 315 wrote:Touval Lysander wrote:Guys guys. This isn't titled "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" - please don't derail what the other 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% of Eve actually care about Not what you intended, but... I can't stop thinking "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" would make a great title for something. Manifesto #3? Rifterlings - small gang frigate PvP - low/nullsec operations, newbie-friendly, free ship program; Join today! www.rifterlings.com
Accidentally The Whole Frigate (blog) - Learning how to pew pew, one loss at a time - www.thewholefrigate.com |
Karl Hobb
Stellar Ore Refinery and Crematorium
634
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Posted - 2012.10.01 02:07:00 -
[23] - Quote
Petrus Blackshell wrote:James 315 wrote:Not what you intended, but... I can't stop thinking "The Trials, Reasoning and Motivation of James 315" would make a great title for something. Manifesto #3? This needs to happen. Nothing Found |
DarthNefarius
Minmatar Heavy Industries
370
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Posted - 2012.10.01 02:46:00 -
[24] - Quote
Touval wrote: In INCURSIONER Eve, you start as a MISSIONER and spend 3 days in local convincing the FC your fit is actually good. You update your skills and technology to be logi because they have enough guns already. There are issues about knowing where to be, when and more importantly, for how long. You accumulate messages saying fix my shields 'but your 200 kms away so you won't be 1-shotted. Which one are you?
I thought I was in IncursionerEVE but since I fly armour shields are a buffer alarm which reminds me I got 10 seconds to hit the need armour button. Nostalgie ist die Faehigkeit, darueber zu trauern, dass es nicht mehr so ist, wie es frueher nicht gewesen ist. -- Manfred Rommel-á |
Shalia Ripper
203
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Posted - 2012.10.01 10:43:00 -
[25] - Quote
You forgot PI EvE, industrialist EvE, Scammer EvE, Exploration EvE, Badposter EvE, Casual EvE, Ragequitter EvE, and so on...
I would think of more, but I am Le Tired EvE.
Why can't I just delete my signature CCP? WHYYYYYYY?
Signatures have consequences.
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Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
185
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Posted - 2012.10.01 11:04:00 -
[26] - Quote
Shalia Ripper wrote:You forgot PI EvE, industrialist EvE, Scammer EvE, Exploration EvE, Badposter EvE, Casual EvE, Ragequitter EvE, and so on...
I would think of more, but I am Le Tired EvE.
In LE TIRED Eve you start as soon as the alarm clock goes off about 3am, timer is off, we gotta go You update your coffee pot with new filters and beans, it's gonna be a long day There are issues about the wife, the kids, and work, hey, it IS Monday after all You accumulate sick certificates and hero posts cos' you know, you were THERE
In PI Eve. what? You want 4 lines of update, issues and accumulation? You're kidding right?
In INDUSTRIALIST Eve, you're either mining, driving a freighter or spinning ships in station while that BPO does it's thing. Very hard to want to bother to write 4 lines, really, it is.
In SCAMMER Eve you write a message about how good your deal is and copy it n SCAMMER Eve you write a message about how good your deal is and paste it In SCAMMER Eve you write a message about how good your deal is and paste it In SCAMMER Eve you write a message about how good your deal is and paste it
In EXPLORATION Eve, no point, he's lost.
In BADPOASTER Eve, see OP.
In CASUAL Eve, see ROOKIE Eve or LOST SOUL Eve or even BITTERVET Eve. They're pretty casual.
In RAGEQUITTER Eve, why bother, they'll never see it anyway.
Sleep tight, see ya tomorrow...
TL out. |
Tinja Soikutsu
Orbital Horizons University GALACTIC UNI0N
42
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Posted - 2012.10.01 11:04:00 -
[27] - Quote
Thanks, OP, got a good laugh outa that. |
Silk daShocka
Lawn Dart Industries
16
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Posted - 2012.10.01 11:12:00 -
[28] - Quote
OMG!!!!!111one|!!!11
Your forgots the FORUM EVE |
Kitty Bear
Disturbed Friends Of Diazepam Disturbed Acquaintance
44
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Posted - 2012.10.01 11:15:00 -
[29] - Quote
Touval Lysander wrote:
In GANKER Eve, you start shooting as soon as you're born into empire. You update your skills and technology just enough to do the gank. You are the issue. You accumulate KM's of Hulks, Mackinaws and freighters and you feel good about it.
Rinse & Repeat ??
What happened to the biomass event. |
Touval Lysander
Sebiestor Tribe Minmatar Republic
186
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Posted - 2012.10.01 11:19:00 -
[30] - Quote
Silk daShocka wrote:OMG!!!!!111one|!!!11
Your forgots the FORUM EVE In FORUM Eve, you start with EveMon to check whether you REALLY do need to log in You update your facebook and twitter status and log to EVE-O forums There are issues with mining, ganks, whines, nerfs, CCP, trolls, bad poasting and everything you said yesterday when you were pissed You accumulate LIKES by taking a stance against BITTERVET Eve, JAMES 315 Eve, WORMHOLE Eve, SCAMMER Eve, BAD POASTER Eve, PVP Eve, MINER Eve, PI Eve, INDUSTRIALIST Eve, FREIGHTER Eve, ad infinitum
You don't really care 'cos you're poasting on your alt anyway. |
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