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Doireen Kaundur
742
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Posted - 2014.04.20 13:06:00 -
[1] - Quote
This old couple decides to take a trip to Israel. While they are there, the wife unfortunately passes away. So the man calls for the undertaker to get her ready for her burial back in the states.
The undertaker says, "Well sir, if you decided to ship her back to the United States its going to cost you $5,000, but if you want we can bury her here for only $150"
So the man thinks about it and finally he says to the undertaker, "well, you know what, I think I'm going to have to send her back to the United States. I'll pay the $5,000"
The undertaker says, are you sure? That's a lot of money to spend"
The man says, "Yeah I remember reading a story of some man dying and being buried here. Three days later he rose again and I just can't take that chance." A great American humorist and author recently said: "The one unintentional flaw of the internet generation is its ability to give the stupidest segments of our population the loudest voices." I have a tendency to agree with his statement.-á |
Sibyyl
427
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Posted - 2014.04.20 13:17:00 -
[2] - Quote
Jesus Christ walks into a hotel. He hands the innkeeper three nails, and he asks, "Can you put me up for the night?"
RIP Brandon Lee. Somebody's Heiney is crowding my icebox.-áSomebody's cold one is giving me chills. |
Slade Trillgon
Brutor Force Federated
2721
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Posted - 2014.04.20 13:22:00 -
[3] - Quote
Three men in a boat all claimed that they were Jesus the son of Christ. All three maid claims and when the first two could not back their's up they looked at the third.
The third man said that he could walk on water and the other to said, "sure let us see it."
THe third man stepped out of the boat an dimmediately sank. When he climed back into the boat he found the other two laughing. He asked why they were laughing and they both looked at him and siad, "you did not even take a step, you sank instantly."
He looked squarely at the two and said, "Sure! I would like to see you two walk on water with holes in your feet." |
Hevymetal
POT Corp Semper Ardens Alliance
266
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Posted - 2014.04.20 13:22:00 -
[4] - Quote
Lol, nice Happy Easter to you as well.
What did the Easter Egg say to the boiling water? It's going to take awhile to get me hard I just got layed by some chick!
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RAIN Arthie
The Ascended Fleet Intrepid Crossing
270
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Posted - 2014.04.20 16:54:00 -
[5] - Quote
Why wouldn't Jesus be good on a hockey team?
He'll get nailed to the boards.
not mine |
Krixtal Icefluxor
INLAND EMPIRE Galactic
110819
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Posted - 2014.04.20 17:09:00 -
[6] - Quote
Just silly stuff:
On Game of Thrones, they celebrate Wester.
-- Twitter Anon.
Pee Wee Easter
Tribble Easter "He has mounted his hind-legs, and blown crass vapidities through the bowel of his neck."-á - Ambrose Bierce on Oscar Wilde's Lecture in San Francisco 1882 |
Tyra Falco
Hugbox Holdings
1674
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Posted - 2014.04.20 20:35:00 -
[7] - Quote
Happy celebrated-one-month-late spring equinox (20th March 2014) to all of you.
Thanks to sickpedia for this piece of genius... 'Today's the day Judas realized his April Fools joke had gone too far' Samoth Egnoled --á 'I like your Avatar alot!-áThe facial tattoo's kinda give you that scary clown look, which suits you quite well.'
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Doireen Kaundur
758
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Posted - 2014.04.20 20:38:00 -
[8] - Quote
Tyra Falco wrote:Happy celebrated-one-month-late spring equinox (20th March 2014) to all of you. Thanks to sickpedia for this piece of genius... 'Today's the day Judas realized his April Fools joke had gone too far'
Technically it was 3 days after the 1st full moon of the Spring Equinox (passover). So Easter was really last week from the christian view.
For pagans it's March 20th.
A great American humorist and author recently said: "The one unintentional flaw of the internet generation is its ability to give the stupidest segments of our population the loudest voices." I have a tendency to agree with his statement.-á |
Krixtal Icefluxor
INLAND EMPIRE Galactic
110827
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Posted - 2014.04.20 21:33:00 -
[9] - Quote
Doireen Kaundur wrote:
Technically it was 3 days after the 1st full moon of the Spring Equinox (passover). So Easter was really last week from the christian view.
For pagans it's March 20th.
It's become as complicated as figuring out when President's Day is (I remember separate Washington and Lincoln Birthdays). "He has mounted his hind-legs, and blown crass vapidities through the bowel of his neck."-á - Ambrose Bierce on Oscar Wilde's Lecture in San Francisco 1882 |
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