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Aria Jenneth
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
793
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Posted - 2015.05.28 05:52:51 -
[1] - Quote
Entry One: Bunk Space
Oh, this one is going to upset a lot of people. But, half the ones that matter are already upset, so ... here goes.
I meant, originally, to start this series of writings off with a tour of the major empires I don't already have any extensive knowledge of, then maybe move on to the outer powers. I knew my "real identity" was "independent capsuleer," but I sort of planned on postponing any exploration of what that meant indefinitely.
... but ... "none of the above" has come calling. I have an identity, and I need to learn how to deal with it.
What's more, I might have worked out a solution to the quasi-mystical psychological riddle my antecedent virtually killed herself trying to puzzle through. Um. More on that later, though.
So: for the purpose of exploring, in depth, my capsuleer identity, I've applied to:
Pyre Falcon Defense Combine. PYRE.
Please calm down. I did think this through.
PYRE is an organization rich with names with at least minor roles in my past, and a couple of major ones. It's effective, efficient, dedicated, and ruthless-- exactly the traits of a successful capsuleer outfit. It's large and strong enough to be significant, but small enough that I won't just disappear into it.
More importantly, it's a collection of misfits, more or less. Exiles and wanderers. The unhomed.
Just. Like. Me.
(Well, not "just." ... my situation's pretty unusual.)
It's also got a generous handful of ex- (or "ex"; we'll see) Sansha. Yes, I know about that. No, it doesn't dissuade me. (Sorry, Vikarion.)
PYRE is both too large and too small a target for a good infiltration effort. If it gets subverted, the event will be difficult to conceal, but won't bring in enough talent to be worth never being able to pull that trick off again.
It's a bad target-- and a good opportunity to observe Nation capsuleers. Which makes it worth the risk, to me.
And, just in case I'm wrong, I'll be bringing along some high-end nanite countermeasures, a medical diagnostics expert unit with attached surgery, a high-end hacker's kit, and an armed electron bomb.
I'm kidding about that last. ... maybe.
Ah ... dear me. Okay. Joking's over.
A person I admire a lot, and who I owe a lot to, has told me that I won't come back from this. The implications are ... well ...
... That what I was afraid would happen is coming to pass. That I'm becoming my old self, walking into the dark a second time. That I've been given a second chance, an opportunity for redemption, and I'm squandering it.
I was afraid of that, it's true. I thought the Black would freeze my soul again, and any hope I represented, any chance to be a better, happier person, would die.
But I think I've found the key to the old Aria's puzzle box, to the "Children of Naught." If I'm right, I'm not only already one of the Demented ... I have been from the start. I've planted the idea enough places that it ought to be carried on, by someone, if something happens to me, but ...
... I need to verify what I think I know. And I can't do that at the far end of a telescope or a holoreel. I need to be there.
It's time to track down the Black, the void spirit that haunted my predecessor, and hold it up to the light for a good, hard look. Wish me luck. |
Jev North
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security
227
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Posted - 2015.05.28 10:10:27 -
[2] - Quote
Aria Jenneth wrote:A person I admire a lot, and who I owe a lot to, has told me that I won't come back from this. What rot. You won't come back from it unchanged, to be sure, but what sort of worthwhile effort leaves people unchanged?
Was it that Shutaq fellow? He seems prone to grandiose pronouncements like this.
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Aelisha
Achura-Waschi Exchange Monyusaiya Industry Trade Group
501
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Posted - 2015.05.28 10:19:36 -
[3] - Quote
Good luck with your move. PYRE have an undeserved bad reputation in the halls of gossip, and a stellar reputation in their ability to execute precision campaigns while still allowing individuals to hold on to their personal beliefs. They are truly a rare breed of corporation in that regard, and if it were not for the KK history and 24th IC flag, I'd consider them an up and coming independent capsuleer entity in their own right. Who knows, maybe that is where they're headed some day?
I look forwards to hearing about your success with PYRE, and hope to meet you next time business brings PYRE to me or myself to PYRE.
CEO of the Achura-Waschi Exchange
Intaki Reborn
Independent Capsuleer
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Kalaratiri
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
577
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Posted - 2015.05.28 12:01:58 -
[4] - Quote
I'll be watching your time with us with interest.
She's mad but she's magic, there's no lie in her fire.
This is possibly one of the worst threads in the history of these forums. -á- CCP Falcon
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Sinjin Mokk
Stillwater Corporation That Escalated Quickly.
125
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Posted - 2015.05.28 12:13:52 -
[5] - Quote
Best of luck and my God light your way and keep you safe.
For the record, PYRE's "bad reputation in the halls of gossip" is actually well-deserved. But they are exemplary on grid.
I've noticed a pattern in your sojourn so far.
You are attracted to power. From the Amarr Bloc to Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque and now to PYRE. You are drawn to it. It tugs at you like a gravity well.
Yet you are content only to orbit. You always take the place of one on the outside, looking in. As if looking into the hearts of power will allow you insight into your own. The role is almost subservient, but not quite.
You are stronger, more powerful and more deadly than you give yourself credit for. Did you notice the near-invisible tendril of control the Empire so subtly tried to wrap around you? Did you see the fear hidden in their eyes as they told you how wonderful you are?
You never needed the Empire. You sure as hell don't need PYRE.
You are more than capable of grabbing the galaxy by the throat, all on your own. I hope your path leads to this realization.
And for God's sake, kick Ghost Hunter in the shins for me.
Dark Amarr: Rumors!
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Jennifer Starfall
Stimulus Rote Kapelle
186
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Posted - 2015.05.28 12:19:33 -
[6] - Quote
Aria,
I believe in you, suoolo. Not the Aria of old or the Vesper that is not, but the you of the here and now, the synthesis of all that you've experienced and have been. You've been dominated by the Black, and you've fled from it. Now is your time to master it and do with it what you choose. And when your belief falters, take mine to strengthen yours.
Ms. North,
Quite true, we are a continuously changing and evolving sum of our experiences and choices. To remain unchanged is to die, whether in the flesh or in our souls.
Whether you agree or disagree with Mr. Shutaq, he is a good man. His adherence to his faith and belief in the good that the Empire could do is admirable. Any disappointment he may feel in Ariabis from a genuine concern for her soul.
Ms. Montenagre,
I agree completely with you about PYRE. During my time with them, I never felt at risk from the Sansha in their ranks. When Pieter spoke to me about returning to the State's arms, he accepted my refusal with respect. I know he doesn't agree with me, but he respects my choice. I think if people bothered to actually listen to them, they would realize they treat people as individuals in their own right, not as stereotypical incarnations of their factions; something this cluster and the capsuleer community could use more of.
Jennifer Starfall
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Aelisha
Achura-Waschi Exchange Monyusaiya Industry Trade Group
502
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Posted - 2015.05.28 12:20:16 -
[7] - Quote
Sinjin Mokk wrote:For the record, PYRE's "bad reputation in the halls of gossip" is actually well-deserved.
We'll have to agree to disagree.
As for the rest, Mr Mokk, I am sure Ms Jenneth is perfectly aware of her capabilities and value as a capsuleer. I find it somewhat patronising that you suggest otherwise, especially when she's joining an organisation that allows its members a great deal of autonomy.
Thanks you, Ms Starfall for your kind words. I hope you are well.
CEO of the Achura-Waschi Exchange
Intaki Reborn
Independent Capsuleer
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Jikkarr
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
14
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Posted - 2015.05.28 12:58:49 -
[8] - Quote
Aria,
I look forward to discussing your application with you further and, although I may not agree to such public musings, they have been delivered with an aplomb that betrays the seemingly internal turmoil. Please feel free to contact me should you have any inquiries, I hope I can assist you in finding your way.
In His Nation alone is the Truth.
_"The thing's hollow, it goes on forever (and).. My God, it's full of stars" _~Arthur C. Clarke
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Tiberious Thessalonia
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
2365
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 13:40:47 -
[9] - Quote
We've been in PYRE Falcon (in leadership positions even!) and the Angels are still Angels, the Serpentis are still Serpentis, the Caldari Patriots are still Patriots, and the Aria Jenneth's shall remain Aria Jenneth. |
Desiderya
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
978
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 14:07:02 -
[10] - Quote
I am looking forward to this.
Ruthlessness is the kindness of the wise.
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Kithrus
Tzedakah Aegis Militia
366
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 15:44:22 -
[11] - Quote
I'm starting to wonder if each of the alliances of note are going to get a turn. If that's the case you are going to have the most interesting perspective of capsulleers in history and a heavily booked schedule.
Should I expect a request mail from you soon to see if I can pencile you in?
Either way it would make for an interesting book.
Did you ever consider a career as an anthropologist?
Darkness is more then absence of light, it is ignorance and corruption. I will be the Bulwark from such things that you may live in the light. Pray so my arms do not grow weary and my footing remain sure.
If you are brave, join me in the dark.
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Nethys Axion
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
12
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Posted - 2015.05.28 15:48:34 -
[12] - Quote
Kithrus wrote:I'm starting to wonder if each of the alliances of note are going to get a turn. If that's the case you are going to have the most interesting perspective of capsulleers in history and a heavily booked schedule.
Should I expect a request mail from you soon to see if I can pencile you in?
Either way it would make for an interesting book.
Did you ever consider a career as an anthropologist?
That may or may not be the case, but either way PYRE Falcon is a good home, but you're free to expect what you wish. |
Kalaratiri
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
577
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 15:49:12 -
[13] - Quote
Sinjin Mokk wrote: For the record, PYRE's "bad reputation in the halls of gossip" is actually well-deserved.
May I ask what we did?
Not "we" the individuals that you may dislike, but "we" the collective members of PYRE. What has PYRE done that so earns us this place in the "halls of gossip"?
She's mad but she's magic, there's no lie in her fire.
This is possibly one of the worst threads in the history of these forums. -á- CCP Falcon
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Sinjin Mokk
Stillwater Corporation That Escalated Quickly.
125
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 16:05:16 -
[14] - Quote
Kalaratiri wrote:Sinjin Mokk wrote: For the record, PYRE's "bad reputation in the halls of gossip" is actually well-deserved.
May I ask what we did? Not "we" the individuals that you may dislike, but "we" the collective members of PYRE. What has PYRE done that so earns us this place in the "halls of gossip"?
Tell you what, let's not clutter Aria's thread. Drop me a line privately and we can discuss it.
Dark Amarr: Rumors!
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Vizage
Capital Allied Industrial Distribution Evictus.
126
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 17:16:14 -
[15] - Quote
Best of luck Ms. Jenneth. I've had the rare opportunity to make friends with at least a few employee's of PYRE. It has truly been a great pleasure knowing many of them. You are in good hands.
-K. Amsel |
Lyn Farel
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
997
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 19:34:42 -
[16] - Quote
Sinjin Mokk wrote: You are attracted to power. From the Amarr Bloc to Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque and now to PYRE. You are drawn to it. It tugs at you like a gravity well.
Huh... SFRIM and power ? Not the first association I would have made... |
Aldrith Shutaq
PIE Inc. Praetoria Imperialis Excubitoris
843
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 19:45:55 -
[17] - Quote
Jev North wrote:Aria Jenneth wrote:A person I admire a lot, and who I owe a lot to, has told me that I won't come back from this. What rot. You won't come back from it unchanged, to be sure, but what sort of worthwhile effort leaves people unchanged? Was it that Shutaq fellow? He seems prone to grandiose pronouncements like this.
Do not presume to know what I was speaking of, Ms. North. Perhaps she was never really with us to begin with, but I am sure that spending five minutes in fleet with your morally bankrupt whirlwind of living weapons will ensure she will never have the desire to know what it means to be human again, if only because it would mean facing what she has done.
Aria, the reason why I asked you to not draw blood in the name of the Empire was that I wanted you to justify your actions before you committed to them. I did not want to selfishly use your will and power to our own ends without your full knowledge of what you were standing for and consent to use violence to uphold it. I wanted you to take a cause seriously, and to take the lives you would protect and destroy in its defense seriously. To do otherwise would be to harm you; to usurp your will by taking advantage of your ignorance and turn you into exactly what you seemed to want to avoid becoming: a mere weapon.
Things, however, are different now. It seems that you do not have any relevant will to manipulate:
Aria Jenneth wrote:We live in a pretty brutal universe, and ... the thing is, I don't care. I don't feel any responsibility for humanity's well-being, or for the State, or the Federation, or the Republic ... or the Empire. I don't really care about ideals or principles, either, outside of my own integrity.
You have failed to cultivate a sense of compassion greater than your immediate self-interest. Perhaps you cannot help this. But I was not lying when I told you that you would not come back.
Once you begin killing for no reason greater than a bland 'acceptance' of what you believe your 'nature' to be, you will never again be able to try to redeem yourself without great discomfort to yourself. That discomfort will be guilt as you come to realize that have destroyed more than you have preserved or created. I cannot foresee you enduring this discomfort for the sake of returning to humanity. Like all the rest, including hour former self, you will simply ignore humanity's suffering in favor of your own comfort and inflated sense built upon worthless ideas of purposeless power.
Goodbye Vesper. I hope you find your peace. And when your shambling corpse twitches forth from the darkness to randomly strike at people I care about, I will be there to stop you. |
Jev North
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security
232
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 20:30:48 -
[18] - Quote
"Yes" would have sufficed. But thank you. |
Lyn Farel
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
1000
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 20:32:24 -
[19] - Quote
But what would be the difference sir ? You fight for the same result, through the same means, in the same warzone. She will too.
For different reasons ? Who is the less honest between you two ? The one that does not try to justify the unjustifiable ?
Er well... I know we already had that discussion. I am sorry for that, and please forgive my words, but with all due respect, I also know her better than you do. |
Claudia Osyn
Minmatar Confederate Ushra'Khan
1217
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 20:41:36 -
[20] - Quote
Ooooo, are we doing the " I'm fighting for the right reasons, you're not!" thing? That's one of my favorite games!
The lack of money is the root of all evil.
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Nethys Axion
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
13
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Posted - 2015.05.28 21:52:09 -
[21] - Quote
Claudia Osyn wrote:Ooooo, are we doing the " I'm fighting for the right reasons, you're not!" thing? That's one of my favorite games!
Well naturally everyone believes they fight for the right reasons, else they wouldn't fight on that side. Though, it would be beneficial if we all stayed on topic, yes? |
Lunarisse Aspenstar
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
357
|
Posted - 2015.05.28 23:44:01 -
[22] - Quote
Sinjin Mokk wrote:
You are attracted to power. From the Amarr Bloc to Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque and now to PYRE. You are drawn to it. It tugs at you like a gravity well.
Oh gosh. I am speechless.
"Power" and SFRIM? Well.. umm the Society has, clergy, Holders, scientists, station traders, miners, explorers, a scattering of combat pilots, soldiers and industrialists, ice cream epicurans and social planners.. and, err... well some who are hard to define! A fellowship as diverse as the Empire itself is diverse. I don't think "power", however, fits into our description! |
Sinjin Mokk
Stillwater Corporation That Escalated Quickly.
125
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Posted - 2015.05.29 00:25:38 -
[23] - Quote
Lunarisse Aspenstar wrote:Sinjin Mokk wrote:
You are attracted to power. From the Amarr Bloc to Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque and now to PYRE. You are drawn to it. It tugs at you like a gravity well.
Oh gosh. I am speechless. "Power" and SFRIM? Well.. umm the Society has, clergy, Holders, scientists, station traders, miners, explorers, a scattering of combat pilots, soldiers and industrialists, ice cream epicurans and social planners.. and, err... well some who are hard to define! A fellowship as diverse as the Empire itself is diverse. I don't think "power", however, fits into our description!
Perhaps you should take a closer look.
Dark Amarr: Rumors!
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Kyoko Sakoda
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
221
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Posted - 2015.05.29 01:37:18 -
[24] - Quote
Claudia Osyn wrote:Ooooo, are we doing the " I'm fighting for the right reasons, you're not!" thing? That's one of my favorite games!
Pft. Like people need reasons! |
Claudia Osyn
Minmatar Confederate Ushra'Khan
1220
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Posted - 2015.05.29 03:33:20 -
[25] - Quote
Kyoko Sakoda wrote:Claudia Osyn wrote:Ooooo, are we doing the " I'm fighting for the right reasons, you're not!" thing? That's one of my favorite games! Pft. Like people need reasons! But listening to people justify themselves to people who already have their minds made up is fun....
The lack of money is the root of all evil.
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Nethys Axion
Pyre Falcon Defence and Security Multicultural F1 Brigade
14
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Posted - 2015.05.29 04:10:49 -
[26] - Quote
Osyn, aside from your corporate interests, you're kinda likeable. |
Aria Jenneth
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
804
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Posted - 2015.05.29 04:24:44 -
[27] - Quote
To all those of you wishing me well: thank you.
Mr. Kithrus: I don't really have an itinerary as such. Just a lot of questions.
And ... yeah. The similarities to actual, academic anthropology did occur to me.
Mr. Mokk: I ... am afraid I have to echo the Praefecta's puzzlement. SFRIM may have power of a kind, but it's almost all the sort that capsuleers don't normally give much weight to. I came to the Societas at Aldrith Shutaq's suggestion, seeking sanctuary and a chance to meet and interact with the Amarr ... and I found a home.
But not power. Not exactly. ... except, maybe, the gentlest sort.
Aldrith casts me out with a curse on his lips. The Societas ... tells me I'll always have a place there.
On which ... painful note:
Aldrith.
I would have been a sword in your hand. A hawk on your wrist.
Instead, you chose to bind me into my sheath. Keep me hooded and tethered.
It was a good choice in many ways. I've learned a lot I might not have, otherwise.
I admired you. I looked up to you.
But ...
You may truly believe in your cause. You may admire your enemies for truly believing in theirs. I've had ample chance to watch the fires of belief burning bright.
And I don't think the universe cares. The dead are still dead.
You wanted me only to kill for the cause I took seriously. But what if I don't care about grand causes, but do care about the people around me?
What if I wanted to fight for people who mattered to me, instead of for your Empire?
... but that wasn't grand enough for you.
I wasn't going to say this, but ... you've got some nerve, telling me I lack compassion after forbidding me to fight for my FRIENDS!
In the name of ... what? Keeping me pure? Neutral? ... How could I possibly be either?
... I've defended you. All this time, I've been making your excuses for you.
....
Thanks for making this easy. |
Samira Kernher
Praetorian Auxiliary Force Praetoria Imperialis Excubitoris
1549
|
Posted - 2015.05.29 04:48:24 -
[28] - Quote
Fighting for friends instead of causes often results in defending people even when they do wrong. But evil has to be fought, even when it takes root in a friend.
Where Captain Shutaq is wrong is in saying you don't have compassion. You do. The problem is, sometimes compassion isn't the right choice. Compassion for the Deceiver blinds you to his evil.
But I know that you care about whether a choice is right or wrong. You've said that much. I will pray that you one day see differently.
"Embrace those who would learn, defeat those who would make mockery of God's way. Through the penance of deeds, the sins of forefathers may eventually be washed away."
-- His Royal Highness the Heir Yonis Ardishapur
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Aldrith Shutaq
PIE Inc. Praetoria Imperialis Excubitoris
846
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Posted - 2015.05.29 06:31:03 -
[29] - Quote
Aria Jenneth wrote:Aldrith casts me out with a curse on his lips. Not a curse, a simple statement of belief. You are not gone yet, but you will be soon.
Aria Jenneth wrote:I would have been a sword in your hand. A hawk on your wrist. But you are not those things. You are a human being who does not deserve be used as a simple weapon. You deserve to be able to live in a community that values you, surrounded by family and friends, all without the expense of having to destroy the lives of others to gain what you need to do so. Killing is an obligation, not an occupation. Only you have the right to decide who and what you destroy. You can only lend the right to be given orders to someone, and I felt that no one deserved that right with you for the moment, least of all me. I have used pilots for the gains of the Empire before and I am done with that. I fight alongside the willing, not the unwitting.
Aria Jenneth wrote:And I don't think the universe cares. The dead are still dead. That is where you are wrong. The dead are still dead but the living are still living. And even if the universe does not care, that only means that it falls upon us to care. Humanity would not be where it is now if all thought like you. No human group would grow larger than a hunter-gather band of kin-relations. If the Amarr thought like you my people would have been left to wither away in the deserts of Mishi IV, never to have known the stars. Either that or slaughtered as the Empire eliminated a group of useless strangers.
One could draw comparisons to a capsuleer encountering a neutral pilot in a basic civilian frigate while they were in an advanced cruiser. I wonder... would PYRE crush the unknown or foster it? Who knows really, since they are not bound to any rules on the subject. I suppose it would depend upon the mood of the day.
Aria Jenneth wrote:What if I wanted to fight for people who mattered to me, instead of for your Empire? That would be lovely, so long as they are decent people. As Lt. Kernher aptly pointed out, you might care about people who upset more people than they help. This might obligate you to condone their actions and protect them from retribution. Besides this, people change more quickly and more drastically than the goals of an entire society. I hope you are prepared to watch those changes closely and act accordingly.
Aria Jenneth wrote:I wasn't going to say this, but ... you've got some nerve, telling me I lack compassion after forbidding me to fight for my FRIENDS! It does not take any nerve at all to say this. Friends can be wrong. I wanted you to decide for yourself what was worth fighting for, not fall back on some ridiculous form of reciprocal peer-pressure. You have often been compared to a child Vesper, but this notion, by far, is the most immature one you seem to possess.
You do not fire into a crowd of people because your friends think it right (which, by the way, is exactly what you are doing when you fire on a crewed vessel). You have to evaluate the reasons for yourself, or you are not your own person. All this statement says to me is "I am incapable of making moral judgments so I will leave the hard decisions up to people I happen to like, regardless of their own capacity for moral thought."
Personally, I do not take ignorance as an excuse for poor behavior. If I were your father I'd be terrified you'd take a liking to the friendly neighborhood gangster and end up shooting someone upon their direction. Which, funnily enough, is exactly what is happening. These gangsters just happen to be co-workers of mine. Rather unfortunate, really. |
Aria Jenneth
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
806
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Posted - 2015.05.29 06:43:31 -
[30] - Quote
Aldrith.
You have misunderstood my frustration. I never asked your permission to join PYRE. Our agreement is ending; I recognize no authority in you to forbid me from aiding them.
Also, while there are people among them with whom I have a history, calling them "friends" just yet is a stretch.
I was referring to the Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque, SFRIM-- which you declined to interpret my promise to allow me to aid. You may recall a rather tense conversation with Jennifer Starfall over the matter.
Are you still prepared to lecture me about defending the unrighteous, sir? |
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