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Anwar DeRuyter
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Posted - 2008.11.20 11:58:00 -
[1]
DON'T PANIC! The Federation NEEDS YOU to join OUR ARMY
Yes the Caldari are numerous as Flys on Sh*T, and their missile spammage blots out the sun, but relax folks - Funk Inc has the situation well in hand. In order to ram the lofty ideals of freedom and liberty down the collective throats of The Jackbooted Caldari, we here At Funk Inc have spared no effort in recycling an unused recruitment corp to Bring you "The 1st Microfunkish Gallente Axillary Milita Regiment" (to be known hereafter as the "Microfunks").
The Microfunks Highly experienced PvP officers will equip you with the tools, and more importantly the training, to take the war into the very boardrooms of the Caldari megacorps - and we won't stop until the market hubs of Jita overflow with Spiced wine, garlic paste and novelty fetish toys!
Viva la Federation!
"But Funk!" I hear you cry, "my Gallente standings are pi*s poor, How can I join your Fake Afro wearing, 70's Disco playing, Cuban heeled, casual PvPing march on Jita?" Not to worry my friends, we here at Funk Inc have devoted no less than 7 minutes whilst I was on the loo earlier to carefully planning out every possible contingency. Your dismal standings can be rectified in no time at all simply by standing near our captive isk farming ravens as they mindlessly hammer out lvl4 missions. [No isk Farmers were Injured during the making of this feature]
Just join the public channel "Funk Inc" for Factional standing buffing arrangements. If by some remarkable twist of fate you already have the required standing to join the Gallente militia , head to your nearest Microfunk office and shove your scrunched up, coffee and wine stained application (remembering to at least try and scrawl your name in some sort of crayon on it) through our letterbox to receive your automated hand picked acceptance mail.
We offer: - Training In all aspects of Eve pvp - Ship and module Replacement Programs ( Yes, thats right, FREE STUFF) - Organized PvP Ops lead by professional Funkish Officers - kill board - Forums - Out Of Game Voice Comms - 0.0 Opportunities for Advanced members - True Love - Eternal life - All your dreams come true
When asked what makes a good CEO, a Great FC once said without a seconds' hesitation: "The ability to swear for five minutes without repeating yourself son" and if you want to witness this for yourself, and if your Kung Fu is strong, and you can Find the office, maybe you should hire yourself to "The Microfunks". No minimum skill points. Sneaky alts, thieves, and spys welcome (u wont get roles and I ain't telling you anything other than bad jokes so knock yourselves out).
(Disclaimer - Offers are subject to availability or may be lies, especially that bit about eternal life. Applicants must pretend to be aged 18 years or over. By applying to Microfunks you are willingly forfeiting your human rights. Isk Farmers may have been harmed whilst making the claim that 'isk farmers were not harmed during the making of this feature').
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.20 12:17:00 -
[2]
quoting a great, great man... "MOAR MINIONS!!!"
Sign up for Microfunks...great organization... endless potential for advancement (read nullsec fun)... you won't be disappointed.
Grayer "Gradimacated from Microfunk's Skewl of Herdknocks" |
bluebeyond
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.20 12:49:00 -
[3]
Micros is ace. Join NOW! |
Funkcikle
Gallente DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.20 13:36:00 -
[4]
The MicrofunkÆs are, without question Flatulent vermin who pose an almost imperceptible threat to capsuleer society as we know it. Furthermore I would like to state, for the record that these tiny funklings are in no way shape or form associated with the enlightened teachings of DoctrineÖ. As such, we wholeheartedly endorse this product and/or service.
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Chairborne
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Posted - 2008.11.20 18:30:00 -
[5]
Join Microfunks NOW !
Dooooo It!
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Faekurias
Black Legion Command Black Legion.
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Posted - 2008.11.21 00:11:00 -
[6]
Great bunch of guys, most awesome amount of win. ------------------ Recruiting..
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.21 16:32:00 -
[7]
Bump for... ::drum roll::... Microfunkaliciousness. |
malcotch
Gallente DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.22 11:12:00 -
[8]
What you waiting for, this is where its at!, non stop action!, you won't regret joining!
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Gurkhador
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Posted - 2008.11.22 11:26:00 -
[9]
Who I have to contact in game for some infos?
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malcotch
Gallente DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.22 12:11:00 -
[10]
Originally by: Gurkhador Who I have to contact in game for some infos?
Contact 'Anwar DeRuyter'
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GromPrime
Gallente DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.22 13:05:00 -
[11]
Bump for a Awesome corp!
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.22 20:34:00 -
[12]
Do the right thing... join... how can you turn down free backrubs after every op? ;-)
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bluebeyond
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.23 13:50:00 -
[13]
WTF BUMP
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NEUR0TIC CAT
Gallente Federal Navy Academy
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Posted - 2008.11.23 14:34:00 -
[14]
I am very interested in FW and pew pew, you guys look perfect..sounds like hell fun...will contact you in game
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.23 19:52:00 -
[15]
Major bumpage... ::flexes biceps:: Yeah, baby!
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NEUR0TIC CAT
Gallente Federal Navy Academy
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Posted - 2008.11.24 02:04:00 -
[16]
Have submitted my application, dont mind the beer stains, I was drunk when I did it and therefore cant be held responsible for any highjinks that ensues
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.24 14:36:00 -
[17]
Join the public channel "Funk Inc" and/or contact Anwar DeRuyter... and don't forget to bring cake!
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Xorxarle
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.24 14:37:00 -
[18]
saee, they even supply entertainment. Give them a go, great bunch.
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Waylan Yutani
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Posted - 2008.11.25 02:07:00 -
[19]
We are constantly in the process of finding new and intresting ways to blow other peeps (and dare i say; ourself) up. So if you think an lost fight is better than no fight at all, you really should apply.
its all about the leeroy baby
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.25 16:24:00 -
[20]
we go bump in the night...
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.27 12:44:00 -
[21]
get back up there!
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Xorxarle
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.28 16:48:00 -
[22]
I hear they're still recruiting.
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.11.30 19:14:00 -
[23]
bumpity bump
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.12.01 23:47:00 -
[24]
can't think of anything to say today... so just a plain old "bump" ought to do it...
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bluebeyond
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.12.03 11:05:00 -
[25]
WTB bumps in packs of 10.
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bluebeyond
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.12.04 21:32:00 -
[26]
Hump
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.12.05 06:40:00 -
[27]
rump
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bluebeyond
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.12.07 19:57:00 -
[28]
up
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Grayer
DEATHFUNK Doctrine.
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Posted - 2008.12.08 02:03:00 -
[29]
Up we go!
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juduzz
Amarr Atomic Battle Penguins The Darwin Award Foundation
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Posted - 2008.12.08 05:29:00 -
[30]
Friendly bump, these guys gave us a few good fights during our wars GL with recruitment.
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