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The Logistical Nightmare (Ready for Contracts)

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Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.06 15:41:00 - [1] Edited by: Kage Toshimado on 06/03/2009 15:41:24 Greetings to those who have stumbled upon this page hoping for some form of new entertainment. I am placing this announcement on behalf of The Logisitical Nightmare (Corp ticker: BADRM) corporation in an effort to explain our unique form of art. Now just so you understand, most of this may be a "Holy Wall of Text Batman" but I will promise to try and break it up into sections for your viewing pleasure. Question - Who or what is The Logistical Nightmare? A - The Logistical Nightmare is a newly formed, hand selected group of pilots who specialize in Logistical ships such as the Guardian, Basilisk, Oneiros, and Scimitar. We are also generally veteran pilots of EVE who know the game mechanics. We are also accustomed to pvp warfare and are very excited to engage in lots of it. (when applicable!) Question - So what exactly do you do? A - Well, this is the interesting part. What we do exactly depends on several factors, but in sticking with the basics: we help our employers win battles! When we receive a contract, we show up in our logistical ships, ready to provide remote armor, shields, and cap to our employers often times completely unknown to our employers enemy. Let me give you an example - "Hi, I was interested in hiring The Logistical Nightmare to help my corp. You see we have been war decced by this other corporation and they have us camped almost constantly, can you help us?" "Yes, of course. We will send Logistical ships tailored to fit the needs of the ships you are flying. What are the ship types you are camped in currently?" "Well, I am in a Raven and my friend who is camped with me is in a Domi." "Okay, we will send a 2 Guardians, a Basilisk, and an Oneiros pilot. They will make contact with you once they have gotten close to the system." Of course more questions than this will be asked, and a contract would need to be drawn up, but are you starting to get the idea? No? Well read on... Question - So, you're a Merc Corp? A - Not entirely. We can be hired to help you win your battles yes, but we aren't neccessarily war deccing and fighting your war for you. We want to help you get those kills yourself! Why pay a merc corp to do all the fighting and have all the fun for you when we can help you get revenge with your own ships? All the while you can be enjoying the game by learning pvp skills, and laughing at the misery of your opponent when they realize that they can't blow you up, while you hack away at them. Question* - Okay wait, but if you repair them, their enemy can fire on you! A - Wow genius, you figure that out all by yourself? Of course they can fire on us. We don't like to give away all our secrets but we are more than prepared and ready during combat to handle this situation. Question - What if they declare war on The Logistical Nightmare? A - Well, that's the beauty of our corporation. Not all of our members are actually in The Logistical Nightmare corporation. We have "hidden" pilots in multiple corporations ready to come repair us if we are war decced. Plus, it's not like we are AGAINST war decs on us anyhow. It just give us the chance to play PVP fun fun too! Question - Um, so, how much is this going to cost someone to hire you? A- We take a unique variety of factors into considiration when determining cost analysis. We don't neccessarily like to give away those variety of factors to non-clientelle. But they will be explained in full detail during the negotiating phase of the contract. Yes, we are negotioable. We even have double coupons on Tuesday. More questions? Post them in this thread. If you're looking for a part time or full time job with us, contact me in game and I will be happy to answer your questions. Remember, you may not need to actually join The Logistical Nightmare corporation to take part. * You not blowing up is not 100% guaranteed if you're just a plain ol' moron.
Tchell Dahhn Suddenly Ninjas Tear Extraction And Reclamation Service	Posted - 2009.03.06 15:44:00 - [2] As CEO of TEARS and Suddenly Ninjas, I wholeheartedly approve of this Service. We're Recruiting!
Nexus Kinnon Genos Occidere	Posted - 2009.03.06 15:48:00 - [3] Pretty cool idea. Originally by: Sol'Kanar I am the spermicidal cream to your semen of lies.
Misanth RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE Black Legion.	Posted - 2009.03.06 15:53:00 - [4] Originally by: Tchell Dahhn As CEO of TEARS and Suddenly Ninjas, I wholeheartedly approve of this Service. I thought you did because the OP has a suddenly ninjas-sig. Originally by: Nexus Kinnon Pretty cool idea. Agree. -
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.06 16:03:00 - [5] Originally by: Misanth Originally by: Tchell Dahhn As CEO of TEARS and Suddenly Ninjas, I wholeheartedly approve of this Service. I thought you did because the OP has a suddenly ninjas-sig. Agree. Thanks for letting me know, it's been removed since I am not in the corp. No offense meant to Tchell or Suddenly Ninjas and I appreciate the endorsments so far.
Tchell Dahhn Suddenly Ninjas Tear Extraction And Reclamation Service	Posted - 2009.03.06 16:19:00 - [6] Originally by: Misanth I thought you did because the OP has a suddenly ninjas-sig. I support the service, because not only is this a smart idea, but Kage is a Pilot who is well-respected within the TEARS Membership. We were lucky to have him while we did, and wish him well on future endeavours. We're Recruiting!
Misanth RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE Black Legion.	Posted - 2009.03.06 16:42:00 - [7] Originally by: Kage Toshimado Thanks for letting me know, it's been removed since I am not in the corp. No offense meant to Tchell or Suddenly Ninjas and I appreciate the endorsments so far. My post was very light-hearted Kage, not an attack. I liked your way of addressing it. I see why Tchell respect you, and I thought the idea was pretty cool, so - good luck. -
Chomin H'ak Integrated Takeovers	Posted - 2009.03.06 17:27:00 - [8] Great idea. Kudos to you for coming up with this. Originally by: Frenden Dax My heart hopes that people aren't that stupid, but my experiences thus far suggest otherwise. My Blog - Fighting for Eden
Sol'Kanar Minmatar SRIUS BISNIS	Posted - 2009.03.06 17:44:00 - [9] Reverse duplex grief-gank! Acquire insured and cheaply tanked battleships. Find some friends to shoot at you Call these guys When they start repping you, shoot the station or try and gank a 3rd party on the undock pipe Laugh heartily.
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.06 18:12:00 - [10] Originally by: Sol'Kanar Reverse duplex grief-gank! When they start repping you, shoot the station or try and gank a 3rd party on the undock pipe Laugh heartily. As would The Logistical Nightmare guys since they will be keeping your deposit to pay for their new ships. What else you got Sol' ?

SnootySneerMan	Posted - 2009.03.06 18:33:00 - [11] This is quite frankly one of the best ideas I have seen in a while. This has the potential to drastically alter the balance of power in many run of the mill high sec wars. I.E. those that frequently war dec so called "easy targets". If nothing, it will add a level of paranoia to the battle field. Nice idea. And don't forget to tell the fail pvp pilots that hire you to fit points for crying out loud. The Sneering Man of Snooty
Sol'Kanar Minmatar SRIUS BISNIS	Posted - 2009.03.06 19:22:00 - [12] Originally by: Kage Toshimado Laugh, sure... as would The Logistical Nightmare pilots since they will be keeping your deposit to pay for their new ships. I presume in your manner of speaking, this was a question, at least I will take it as such. What other questions? Aha! It appears I'm helping you expose your business model to the public! So what you're saying is that you require quite a large collateral payment for your services which will be returned when services are rendered? What if you lose a ship due to attracting aggro you can't handle? Would money come out of the collateral or would you absorb the expense for failing at your job?
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.06 20:10:00 - [13] Originally by: Sol'Kanar So what you're saying is that you require quite a large collateral payment for your services which will be returned when services are rendered? What if you lose a ship due to attracting aggro you can't handle? Would money come out of the collateral or would you absorb the expense for failing at your job? I don't mind exposing some portions of the business model. I just thought maybe that part was a little too much detail to get into right away on here. I am happy to divulge details if you'd like, which is seems you do. So now to answer your questions. A large collateral may or may not be determined as neccessary. It depends really. If some -9.8 person sends me an evemail, asking to contract us to Old Man Star, I'm going to be more than a little sketchy right away. Deposit? Oh yeah. If we have prior business dealings or actually know someone based on their in game merits, then a deposit probably will not be asked for. For the second part of your question, ISK would not come out of someone's deposit for a mistake made on our end. Or to put it as you said, attracting aggro we can't handle. The full amount of a deposit would be returned to our employer upon completion of the contract without strings attached as long as said employer did not attempt to engage us in an act of aggression.
TimMc Gallente The Black Rabbits The Gurlstas Associates	Posted - 2009.03.06 20:15:00 - [14] Very cool idea, but I hope no one I kill uses your services. Neutrals repping war targets is irritating as ****, especially as they don't get a docking timer if I recall.
Sol'Kanar Minmatar SRIUS BISNIS	Posted - 2009.03.06 20:29:00 - [15] Edited by: Sol''Kanar on 06/03/2009 20:30:02 Originally by: Kage Toshimado I don't mind exposing some portions of the business model. I just thought maybe that part was a little too much detail to get into right away on here. I am happy to divulge details if you'd like, which is seems you do. So now to answer your questions. Aye, just trying to properly vet you guys since everyone else thus far has been doing the "brilliant!" and "genius!" parroting. Originally by: Kage Toshimado A large collateral may or may not be determined as neccessary. It depends really. If some -9.8 person sends me an evemail, asking to contract us to Old Man Star, I'm going to be more than a little sketchy right away. Deposit? Oh yeah. If we have prior business dealings or actually know someone based on their in game merits, then a deposit probably will not be asked for. For the second part of your question, ISK would not come out of someone's deposit for a mistake made on our end. Or to put it as you said, attracting aggro we can't handle. The full amount of a deposit would be returned to our employer upon completion of the contract without strings attached as long as said employer did not attempt to engage us in an act of aggression. Sounds more than reasonable. If this catches on, I suspect you'll see other merc corps advertising this type of service. And then of course, those of us who are crafty enough to spot some lulzy scam potential. EDIT: ZOMG SPELLING
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.06 20:57:00 - [16] No problem at all. All of the feedback has been more than helpful so far. Thanks for the support and the questions both! In reading the comments in this post, I have developed a few more questions in my head which will take some amount of thinking. As for other merc corps copying or offering the same type of service; I think any form of emulation is flattering. I just have to hope our new and future reputation of rendering a quality service and being the most reliable at what we do keeps us gainfully employed.
Ryoken McKeon Galactic Defence Syndicate Eradication Alliance	Posted - 2009.03.06 21:12:00 - [17] This is an awesome idea, good luck!
Lyris Nairn Caldari Path Of The Cursed	Posted - 2009.03.06 23:48:00 - [18] This right here is why I love C&P. You have people that look at the practices that a lot of people complain about (ninja salvaging, neutral logistics), and then go and make profitable businesses out of them. Genius! With all my Love, 'Little Cinnamon'
BallistaII Genos Occidere	Posted - 2009.03.07 00:16:00 - [19] [Nightmare, Logistical Nightmare] Damage Control II Capacitor Power Relay II Capacitor Power Relay II Capacitor Power Relay II Capacitor Power Relay II 100MN MicroWarpdrive II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Remote Repair Augmentor II Core Defence Field Extender II Core Defence Field Extender II Heavy Armor Maintenance Bot II x3 Nexus Kinnon for CCP President!!!! Please resize image to a maximum of 400 x 120 and filesize of 24000 bytes or under - Mitnal
BallistaII Genos Occidere	Posted - 2009.03.07 00:18:00 - [20] cool idea though. was expecting another merc thread but this is much better~ Nexus Kinnon for CCP President!!!! Please resize image to a maximum of 400 x 120 and filesize of 24000 bytes or under - Mitnal

Nexus Kinnon Genos Occidere	Posted - 2009.03.07 00:47:00 - [21] Originally by: BallistaII [Nightmare, Logistical Nightmare] Damage Control II Capacitor Power Relay II Capacitor Power Relay II Capacitor Power Relay II Capacitor Power Relay II 100MN MicroWarpdrive II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Cap Recharger II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Large Remote Armor Repair System II Remote Repair Augmentor II Core Defence Field Extender II Core Defence Field Extender II Heavy Armor Maintenance Bot II x3 Originally by: Sol'Kanar I am the spermicidal cream to your semen of lies.
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.07 12:56:00 - [22] Edited by: Kage Toshimado on 07/03/2009 12:57:46 In an effort to grow our reputation,and since we are still looking for our first contract The Logistical Nightmare is offering a contest to you, the C&P public, to win the opportunity to have us at your disposal for 1 week! All for the low low price of just 1 million ISK per ticket!! So if only 1 person buys a ticket?! That's right, you have us for a week for only 1 million ISK!! So buy a ticket! Buy 10 tickets! Buy 20! The more tickets, obviously the greater your odds of winning. The winner of the completely random drawing will be held 36 hours from this posting. So, post below if you'd like to enter the raffle, send me the ISK, and I will confirm your ticket numbers back in this post. Unfortunately for posterity sake, I can't keep this a private contract due to the openess and fairness that is required.
spinarax Privateers	Posted - 2009.03.07 13:25:00 - [23] oh shi..
Kirra Liu Echelon Holdings Echelon.	Posted - 2009.03.07 13:45:00 - [24] Originally by: spinarax oh shi.. Shingles? ****zu? Shirley Temple? Shildon AFC?
Hakaro Ino Texnolase	Posted - 2009.03.07 13:55:00 - [25] just wondering, how many pilots do you have at your disposal? its a nice idea and was just wondering how many contracts you can support at once?
Tzar'rim	Posted - 2009.03.07 14:03:00 - [26] Lateral thinking at it's best. If you manage to convince customers to pay collateral and turn out to be honest and logical in paying back this collateral (in other words your name starts to speak for itself) then this is quite a fun and interesting thing to do. I'm not sure many people will be on your doorstep for this because (in general) the people that could use your services more often than not lack the experience/strategical awareness to appreciate it in the first place. That and them probably not being able to actually put down the agressors before you're forced to withdraw (I'm envisioning you alternating logistics, use one and when it gets compromised dock it up and start using the next etc). Self-proclaimed idiot
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.07 14:13:00 - [27] Originally by: Hakaro Ino just wondering, how many pilots do you have at your disposal? its a nice idea and was just wondering how many contracts you can support at once? Valid questions Hakaro and I'm debating on how to best answer it without sounding like I am giving you the run around. For your first question, I don't neccessarily believe that is information that we'd want to divulge at this point in time. I will say this however, if all members of the nightmare were logged in simultaneously, we would be able to provide our employer(s) with a more than excessive amount of reppage and energy. For your second question, I can't answer as of yet since we are waiting for our first contract. If I had to take a guess, it's more than possible to juggle several contracts at a time unless an employer has requested and paid for exclusive contract rights for a period of time. I hope I answered these questions to your satisfaction.
Hakaro Ino Texnolase	Posted - 2009.03.07 14:26:00 - [28] Originally by: Kage Toshimado Originally by: Hakaro Ino just wondering, how many pilots do you have at your disposal? its a nice idea and was just wondering how many contracts you can support at once? Valid questions Hakaro and I'm debating on how to best answer it without sounding like I am giving you the run around. For your first question, I don't neccessarily believe that is information that we'd want to divulge at this point in time. I will say this however, if all members of the nightmare were logged in simultaneously, we would be able to provide our employer(s) with a more than excessive amount of reppage and energy. For your second question, I can't answer as of yet since we are waiting for our first contract. If I had to take a guess, it's more than possible to juggle several contracts at a time unless an employer has requested and paid for exclusive contract rights for a period of time. I hope I answered these questions to your satisfaction. thanks. was kinda the answer i was expecting. seem like its all very well thought out. would be good to see how it goes.
Kage Toshimado Gallente The Logistical Nightmare	Posted - 2009.03.07 14:39:00 - [29] Is the world economy affecting the EVE economy that 1 million ISK is too much for a ticket?
Tervilious	Posted - 2009.03.07 15:07:00 - [30] Great idear many newer corps with young player's could really benifit from this service. do you also offer logistics for high sec pos wars because i see this to be very important



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