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Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 9 post(s) |
INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.09.05 21:05:00 -
[751]
Edited by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE on 05/09/2006 21:10:37 Replies 7
Originally by: Kiyirari Beautiful, i want your children
Inexplicably, there appears to be an extensive list of women now demanding this. The life of an adventurer is indeed a hard one...
Originally by: Tempest Tsai Thanks Innominate! I've been on the 14day trial for a few days, but you've convinced me that this universe is worth checking out!
Good for you, Tempest. EVE has much to offer. My advice to you is to take everything that happens in your stride. This includes being attacked and ruthlessly podded by other players. If you take a positive attitude to being mercilessly destroyed early on then you will go far.
Originally by: Audrea since the anti-hotdogs alliance already showed you everything, from plexes, through mining, cap ships parade... whats left? to learn use of scanner?
This is indeed still left for me to learn! It has now become a personal quest to not use a scanner for as long as possible.
Originally by: Crunch Hardiron You could always try a mTnage a trois...
You could plant a seed in her lady garden while he plows you...
Truly shocking.
Originally by: Valkazm i want to hear more about this so called space sex
Missy is currently sulking at my distinct lack of paying her attention. When I have sweet-talked her perhaps we will get around to it....
Originally by: DarkVipper Omg, Backdoor Bandit will fool you ! Beware... It happened to...
...a friend...
You are certainly not alone in this having happened to "a friend." It has happened to a large number of posters' "friends" on this forum whom I shall not name to save their shame and embarrassment....
Originally by: Audrea How much of your tales are actually real from the 0.0 life as you experienced? how much of it is a fiction with alts, designed solely to entertain us?
All posts are based on actual events I have experienced and no alts have ever been used.
Originally by: Dano Sarum I love how ASCN are brown-nosing their way into the story as per usual.
This is a shocking allegation and is entirely substantiated.......
Originally by: Dnaltrop Nogero What's the difference between an aspiring author and a Large pizza?
The pizza can feed a family of 4 for a night.
Methinks the author here has left his pizza days behind him.
This is somewhat ironic as there is currently a Dominos Pizza box on my coffee table.....
Originally by: Temmerlyn his journey was supposed to see eve and 0.0 for the harsh realities it is and the gritty life out here.
Being constantly viciously attacked in the north, and then in great wildlands, and then in curse, by all manner of malevolent entities enabled me to experience life in 0.0 as a hostile. My luxury bubble baths and foot massages courtesy of ASCN have enabled me to experience life in 0.0 as a friendly. Seems like a good balance so far.
Of my 37 posts, 26 have been of when I was a hostile, and only 11 as a friendly. Am I using this as justification for more exotic pampering? Absolutely.....
Originally by: Serge ever met a space dragon so far? I¦ve been told the¦re out there somewhere ... lurking ...
Alas, I have never encountered one and probably wouldn't know if I did.
Originally by: Spiggs If you warp into my system IĘll applaud. ItĘs always nice to have a warm hand on your entrance!
Very funny. I was going to accuse you of being filthily smutty but considering my Backdoor Bandit post I don't think I could get away with it....
Originally by: Sadist I believe its time someone came to ASCN space and told our storyteller to GTFO.
I have now managed to tell myself to do this. Their POS tanning salons and facial spas are just far too addictive..
Originally by: Valek Noor have you considered writing for a living? or do you now?
I do not, but I must say I have been genuniely encouraged and motivated by the responses of people here. Thanks to all my new friends... |
Sadis Creeg
Caldari Department of Defence
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Posted - 2006.09.05 21:30:00 -
[752]
More!!!
"bumpage as well" That cruise had a smilly face on it, i know it. |
Nanobotter Mk2
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Posted - 2006.09.05 22:21:00 -
[753]
Unfortunately due to the noterioty of this thread, I doubt you are truly getting an accurate feel of 0.0 anymore as far as playability, but it is still a great thread.
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Areconus
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Posted - 2006.09.05 22:34:00 -
[754]
"YES, MEDICAL BABY! BRING ON THE NURSES!"
ROFLROFLROFLROLF
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Rajon Kelper
Omacron Militia Veritas Immortalis
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Posted - 2006.09.05 23:18:00 -
[755]
so will we get to hear about what REALLY happens when Aspiring Authors eat Large Pizzas? ---------------------------------------------------
"The art of war is simple enough. Find out where your enemy is. Get at him as soon as you can. Strike him as hard as you can, and keep moving." |
Kitchi
Minmatar
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Posted - 2006.09.05 23:55:00 -
[756]
Loving every page of this, more, more! ---------------------
"Somebody sent us up the bomb" "We get signal" "What" "Main screen turn on" "5m or i pod u, lol" "What you say" "wtf omg lag" |
Krandor87
Gallente Ore Mongers Pirate Coalition
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Posted - 2006.09.06 02:36:00 -
[757]
Back to the Top!!!
I love this thread.
---------------------------------------
Whats a sig good for?
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Xeoz
Caldari
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Posted - 2006.09.06 03:48:00 -
[758]
I just wanted to add my name to the long list of people who enjoyed reading this. Thanks for the interesting story.
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Crucifixia
Minmatar The Older Gamers
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Posted - 2006.09.06 07:13:00 -
[759]
Great story, thanks for the truly amazing read! * My boat r0xx! * |
Brooks Carlson
Gallente The Splinter Syndicate
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Posted - 2006.09.06 10:13:00 -
[760]
Page 2? not allowed...
'bump'
STICKY DAMMIT! Brooks Carlson,
A veteran of the battle of Endor, and a valued member of Lieutenant Page's Commando's... |
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Wirt
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Posted - 2006.09.06 12:06:00 -
[761]
C'mon CCP, we know you love this tread as much as we do - STICKY DAMMIT
Bump
PS - hope this aint a duplicate cus I just tried this once and got stuck in a log on type loop
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Majutsu
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Posted - 2006.09.06 12:50:00 -
[762]
Edited by: Majutsu on 06/09/2006 12:50:02 I've really enjoyed this.
As a noob I've been intrigued by the tale and even taken a shuttle out and travelled round 0.0 space looking for adventure myself. Got a little hairy a few times when random people shot at me but I managed to escape a few sticky moments only to get blown up by some guy who wouldn't even say hello. I did however last a good hour or so without docking which may not sound impressive but is approximately an hour more than I expected to last.
Luckily I then found a nice person (young lady I think) and asked her to blow my pod up so I didn't have to spend ages flying back to noob space (thanks to that tip in this very thread), she afterwards told me the thank you message was the first time she'd been thanked for killing someone in a pod.
Keep up the story, I love reading it and can't wait for more, for people new to Eve and indeed the whole MMOG thingy idea like me it opens our eyes, seeing that the game isn't just about mining, missions and hiding from Pirates as it did at first seem in my first few days.
10/10
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Kenneth Williams
Church of the Holy INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.09.06 15:57:00 -
[763]
Ere', it's no good 'avin this lyin' about on the back passages of page 2.
It should be thrust rudely back on to page 1 where it belongs.
Naahahahaa!
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Larry Cotton
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Posted - 2006.09.06 16:40:00 -
[764]
I must join the long list of others that have thanked you for the wonderful web you spin. I recently came across your tail and it is now a great diversion during long jumps and further solidifies my decision to promote my trial account to a full account. Keep up the excellent work and do continue to enjoy your travels :).
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Caztra Tor
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Posted - 2006.09.06 16:46:00 -
[765]
Wonderful stuff. Well written and enoyable. When your in stain, you will find that 4gq is an exciting place to be. Good Luck.
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Majutsu
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Posted - 2006.09.06 17:21:00 -
[766]
Originally by: Larry Cotton I recently came across your tail
I can't remember that part of the story being told
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Cletus Graeme
Caldari Mordu's Elite
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Posted - 2006.09.06 20:55:00 -
[767]
Edited by: Cletus Graeme on 06/09/2006 20:55:56
Originally by: Leto Nyx Edited by: Leto Nyx on 31/07/2006 11:07:14 lmao. Viper Command - The Arnold Rimmer of Eve!
(For those who've never heard of Rimmer, you need to watch Red Dwarf)
/QFT
Everytime I read one of Viper's posts in this thread all i can think of is LOOOOOOOSAAAAH. Some ppl really need to pull their finger out from where the sun dont shine.
Indominate
Thankyou for a priceless thread/blog - keep up the great writing !
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Nanobotter Mk2
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Posted - 2006.09.06 21:26:00 -
[768]
"I've really enjoyed this.
As a noob I've been intrigued by the tale and even taken a shuttle out and travelled round 0.0 space looking for adventure myself. Got a little hairy a few times when random people shot at me but I managed to escape a few sticky moments only to get blown up by some guy who wouldn't even say hello. I did however last a good hour or so without docking which may not sound impressive but is approximately an hour more than I expected to last."
Tends to happen when you use shuttles, they warp fast, and are a none threat often let to pass, basic frigs will also get you around fairly well. Try something of value that aligns slower and you will find you will last alot closer to your oringial estimate of nearly no time
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Raxx Crowvente
Caldari UK Corp Lotka Volterra
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Posted - 2006.09.06 21:36:00 -
[769]
Well done m8. I look forward to hearing about your next endeavoures.
Kind Regards, Raxx.
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Patch86
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Posted - 2006.09.06 21:40:00 -
[770]
/me notices that "number of views" on this thread is approaching 160k times viewed.
I wonder what the record is?
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INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.09.06 21:40:00 -
[771]
A Very Tempting Affair
When I had first arrived at ASCN space, I had become acquainted with one of the pilots who had been part of my noble and valiant armed escort:
Link
Brunswick flew a battleship and regularly hired people to haul the loot that dropped from all the rats he frequently killed in the asteroid belts. He asked me if I would like to try this job out and I was more than happy to accept. The pay was 50% of all the bounties on the rats, plus a share of the wonderful loot.
While I was waiting for the first batch of rats to be pummelled by Brunswick, he took the opportunity to teach me some more about the history of ASCN:
Link
I had never heard of Xetic, so this was useful information for me. I had trained Caldari Industrial to Level 3 and was able to now fly a Badger II hauler. Unfortunately, I subsequently discovered that collecting loot without a tractor beam is an incredibly slow process.
Brunswick had to fit one instead, because I did not have the science skill trained to level four yet. Nonetheless, we cleaned out three asteroid belts in a short period of time and at the end I had made 3 million isk in bounties, plus a big stash of loot:
Link
I had now experienced three jobs in 0.0. My first was running a complex with Helen and my second was mining Crimson Arkonor. All three of these jobs were very profitable and I concluded that, of the three, the hauling job is probably the safest and best way for a n00b to start making money out here. I was very glad that I had previously purchased the skill Infomorph Psychology because ASCN had let me install a jumpclone in the love shack, which meant that I could now instantly jump to that system to visit my new friends there whenever I wanted to.
I thanked Brunswick for his time and finally flew out of ASCN space for the first time since I had arrived here. I had developed a taste for caviar and champagne and I hoped that I would not miss it too much.
As I was flying through the first few systems in Stain, I was unexpectedly contacted by a stunning young wench, who went by the name of Frivolous:
Link
Frivolous was a very forward woman who made it clear from the outset that she unequivocably was here to serve my every need and was prepared to ruthlessly pod my girlfriend Missy if it meant getting her hands on me. I was excited by the idea of having two women fight over me and took a moment to compare them both:
Link
Frivolous was the younger, inexperienced and more attractive looking woman, but MissyTrex was the wiser, more knowledgable, wealthy goth with a large wallet to boot. I found myself struggling to come to a decision and it was then that I gave in to temptation and decided to encourage Frivolous to put her shocking suggestion into effect:
Link
I was proposing that frivolous take her first n00b job as an assassin. It was an exciting idea and I indicated that if she could manage to pull it off, I would be willing give her 10% of Missy's vastly outrageous fortune.
Part of me felt very guilty about this plan but the lure of the mountain of cash was stronger than the world's strongest man chopped into a million pieces, mixed with steel, punched a thousand times by Mike Tyson, placed in an urn and prayed over by five hundred warrior monks, sent to a DNA re-configuration lab and then reassembled into a man who was christened with the name Strongy Strong.
My attention was suddenly snapped back to the present, as for the first time in ages I was ruthlessly being shot at by an evil vagabond...
(to be continued...)
The 0.0 Experiment
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Icarium Intaki
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Posted - 2006.09.06 22:11:00 -
[772]
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE A Very Tempting Affair
Part of me felt very guilty about this plan but the lure of the mountain of cash was stronger than the world's strongest man chopped into a million pieces, mixed with steel, punched a thousand times by Mike Tyson, placed in an urn and prayed over by five hundred warrior monks, sent to a DNA re-configuration lab and then reassembled into a man who was christened with the name Strongy Strong.
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Daravel
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Posted - 2006.09.06 22:29:00 -
[773]
"Strongy Strong"
Gotta say, this is an awesome story.
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BoinaAzul
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Posted - 2006.09.06 23:16:00 -
[774]
Strongy Strong
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Valator Uel
Caldari Pax Minor Asylum Confederation of Independent Corporations
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Posted - 2006.09.06 23:22:00 -
[775]
Devs should sticky this... or even add it to the site's stories :D
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darklegionca
Caldari Provisions
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Posted - 2006.09.07 01:45:00 -
[776]
why will they not sticky this damn thread come on guys sticky this
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ForceAttuned Krogoth
InterGalactic Corp. Imperial Republic Of the North
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Posted - 2006.09.07 02:05:00 -
[777]
it would be easer for me to read every day if some one did sticky this... /sigh
"she has extremely larg assets" yeah i bet.
ForceAttuned Krogoth [INTG] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Starbuck 4tw!
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Satsuki Kakuri
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Posted - 2006.09.07 04:36:00 -
[778]
I just spent the last 4 hours reading this entire thread. This is very awesome and inspires me to throw an alt into 0.0 hap-hazardly. I think I'll have far less luck then you have had though.
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Cinder Zork
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Posted - 2006.09.07 07:46:00 -
[779]
Edited by: Cinder Zork on 07/09/2006 07:49:08 You Sir are a true genius and I am astounded by your gift with the pen! Please keep the stories coming I enjoy every single one of them /me bumps the post If you dont mind I would like to add admirer of Sir Nightmare in my bio once again thankyou for all the effort you have put into this thread you are probably the most famous person in EVE and you deserve it!
/me takes a respectfull bow to Sir Nighmare and drops a morphite cookie in the jar
edit: apolagies i clicked on the wrong name post from Sinder Ohm
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Majutsu
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Posted - 2006.09.07 07:51:00 -
[780]
Originally by: Nanobotter Mk2 Try something of value that aligns slower and you will find you will last alot closer to your oringial estimate of nearly no time
I don't have anything of value
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