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Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:53:00 -
[1]
Okay, I've just spent the last 2 hours trying to decide which section to post in, but my offer is so general that I'm unsure where else to make it. (Feel free to move the topic if you have a better idea than me.)
I'm selling, well, me. If you buy me you get me for 2 months time to do with as you wish. I come equipped with a 44 million SP char, Teamspeak, Msm / aim and will obey all your orders.
There are a few clauses to the agreement that are in place to stop a loophole to be exploited however;
1. You must supply anything you wish me to use yourself or be provided by your corp. This is to stop you bankrupting me with orders such as "Buy battleship, attack concord, repeat steps 1 and 2". To literate, If you want me to mine with you, then you must provide the mining barge and strip miners. If you want me to back you up in PvP, you must supply the ship I am to fly with you in and modules attached to it. If you want me to attack [insert 0.0 alliance name here] on my own in a shuttle while wearing a pink dress and shouting Monty Python quotes and other taunts at them, then you must provide the shuttle and pink dress. I will however pay for my own clones, unless your orders result in rather regular pod killings for me (for example, once per day + average) in which case I will ask you to pay for my clones from that point onwards. You cannot order me not to buy a new clone, just stop getting me killed instead <.<
2. I will only obey your orders while you are online or otherwise present. If you want a mining bot there are programs for that, I'm not a substitute for 23/7 mindless labour unless you are also doing it too.
3. You must have Msn, Aim, or some other program to keep in contact with me. I can't hang about on EvE at all times awaiting your arrival; you will instead have to tell me to get on via Msn or whatnot.
4. I can train any skills I like still. However, if you have a skill you would like me to train and it isn't too far out of my training schedule, then I may train what you requested instead.
5. I reserve the right to add further exceptions to the list if you think of a way of exploiting my offer that I didn't think of.
Other than that, anything goes. I'll do whatever you tell me while you are still present. If you want me to mine with you, I will. If you want me to do missions simultaneously or with you, I will. If you want me to PvP in one method or another with you, I will. If you want me to join your corp, I will. Heck, it doesn't even have to be EvE, I'll be yours for 2 months and you could make me play another game with you or do your math homework, it's up to you.
Any ships / modules / etc will be returned will be returned either when you ask for them or when the time is up, whichever comes first (assuming that item has survived the orders you have been giving me). Also, all bounties that I end up with, loot I obtain and so forth while following your orders will be given to you upon my obtaining them and so forth. In essence I will be an extension of your will, fighting and whatnot for your benefit.
If for some reason I am unable to follow your orders (PC breaks, etc) then you will be summarily reimbursed for your time or the time extended appropriately.
My price is a "Capital ships" skillbook and a "Gallente Carrier pilot" skillbook for two months of my time, or just a "Gallente Carrier pilot" skillbook for one month. Payment will be up front.
Feel free to ask questions etc. For example, I'm not sure if 2 months is too much or not, I'd like some opinions. Mostly, my main objective out of this is perhaps I'll get a new EvE friend to fly with out of all of this, the skillbooks are a bonus. If you're not an evil slave driver then I may well continue to follow your orders after our time is up. I would prefer somebody who lets me have Sundays off, just in case following you orders drives me insane so that I can wind down ------------------------------
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endeavour x
Hangover Heros.
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:54:00 -
[2]
My Raven was equipped with the following:
HIGH 06 x Cruise Missile Launcher I 01 x SMALL TRACTOR BEAM 1 01 x SALVAGER I
MEDIUM 04 x LARGE SHIELD EXTENDERS 01 x 'HYPHNOS' ECM 01 x MEDIUM SHIELD BOOSTER
LOW 01 x EMERGENCY DAMAGE CONTROL 01 x ARMOR KINETIC HARDENER I 01 x ARMOR THREMIC HARDENER I 02 x WARP CORE STABILIZER I
DRONES 02 x WARRIOR I DRONES 03 x HAMMERHEAD I DRONES
UPGRADES 01 x ROCKET FUEL CACHE PARTINTION I 01 x BAY LOADING ACCELERATOR I
"If they can't lock you, they can't shoot you." |
Bistot Kid
The First Thing You'll Ever See
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:55:00 -
[3]
Edited by: Bistot Kid on 15/05/2008 20:56:06 You know, that's going to get real old, real quick.
Edit: BTW, it's "heroes".
-------------------- What? Me Worry? -------------------- |
Shakuul
Caldari Extreme Addiction Atrum Tempestas Foedus
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:56:00 -
[4]
Originally by: Bistot Kid You know, that's going to get real old, real quick.
I'm kind of getting a kick out of it, although yeah with every new post he gets closer and closer to a forums ban.
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endeavour x
Hangover Heros.
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:56:00 -
[5]
My Raven was equipped with the following:
HIGH 06 x Cruise Missile Launcher I 01 x SMALL TRACTOR BEAM 1 01 x SALVAGER I
MEDIUM 04 x LARGE SHIELD EXTENDERS 01 x 'HYPHNOS' ECM 01 x MEDIUM SHIELD BOOSTER
LOW 01 x EMERGENCY DAMAGE CONTROL 01 x ARMOR KINETIC HARDENER I 01 x ARMOR THREMIC HARDENER I 02 x WARP CORE STABILIZER I
DRONES 02 x WARRIOR I DRONES 03 x HAMMERHEAD I DRONES
UPGRADES 01 x ROCKET FUEL CACHE PARTINTION I 01 x BAY LOADING ACCELERATOR I
"If they can't lock you, they can't shoot you." |
Bistot Kid
The First Thing You'll Ever See
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:57:00 -
[6]
What a clever boy.
-------------------- What? Me Worry? -------------------- |
Bish Ounen
Gallente Omni-Core Freedom Fighters Ethereal Dawn
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:58:00 -
[7]
Originally by: Bistot Kid Edited by: Bistot Kid on 15/05/2008 20:56:06 You know, that's going to get real old, real quick.
It's already frigging old.
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ExcellciuM
Caldari The New Order. SMASH Alliance
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Posted - 2008.05.15 20:59:00 -
[8]
YOU BE KILLIN MY MEME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Gone'Postal
Minmatar Vengeance 8 Interceptors
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:00:00 -
[9]
Originally by: Bish Ounen
Originally by: Bistot Kid Edited by: Bistot Kid on 15/05/2008 20:56:06 You know, that's going to get real old, real quick.
It's already frigging old.
You do kinda have to let the guy off, hes too stupid to know a keyboard has more then the keyboard shortcuts for Copy&Paste.
Feel sorry for him, I do.
Questions, Comments, Problems, Please address them to the CSM.. Now CCP Never have to visit the forum. -V8I-
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Bish Ounen
Gallente Omni-Core Freedom Fighters Ethereal Dawn
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:02:00 -
[10]
Pfft. Stupid spam posts reported "endeavour x".
Enjoy your forum vacation.
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Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:03:00 -
[11]
Ummmm....? What's going on here? |
Gone'Postal
Minmatar Vengeance 8 Interceptors
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:04:00 -
[12]
Originally by: Amplify Ummmm....? What's going on here?
Attack of the monkeys rear copy&paste attack squad.
Questions, Comments, Problems, Please address them to the CSM.. Now CCP Never have to visit the forum. -V8I-
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ExcellciuM
Caldari The New Order. SMASH Alliance
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:04:00 -
[13]
ITT WE DISCUSS RAVEN SETUP!
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Gone'Postal
Minmatar Vengeance 8 Interceptors
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:05:00 -
[14]
Originally by: ExcellciuM ITT WE DISCUSS RAVEN SETUP!
theres a forum for that... Learn to read.
Questions, Comments, Problems, Please address them to the CSM.. Now CCP Never have to visit the forum. -V8I-
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Bish Ounen
Gallente Omni-Core Freedom Fighters Ethereal Dawn
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:07:00 -
[15]
Back on topic;
My corp has a player with particular, erm, "preledictions". Could we hire you to go and give him some sweet, sweet, man-loving?
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Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:07:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Gone'Postal
Originally by: Amplify Ummmm....? What's going on here?
Attack of the monkeys rear copy&paste attack squad.
I don't suppose I could get a reply or two that are on topic? ------------------------------
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Bish Ounen
Gallente Omni-Core Freedom Fighters Ethereal Dawn
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:09:00 -
[17]
Originally by: Amplify
Originally by: Gone'Postal
Originally by: Amplify Ummmm....? What's going on here?
Attack of the monkeys rear copy&paste attack squad.
I don't suppose I could get a reply or two that are on topic?
Mine was on topic... sort of...
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Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:10:00 -
[18]
Originally by: Bish Ounen Back on topic;
My corp has a player with particular, erm, "preledictions". Could we hire you to go and give him some sweet, sweet, man-loving?
Well... I suppose it's within the limits of laid out agreement, so if you want me to hump his leg etc then I will obey <.< ------------------------------
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Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:48:00 -
[19]
Any chance of some more on-topic replies, perhaps somebody even taking me up on my offer? ------------------------------
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Asestorian
Domination. Phalanx Alliance
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:49:00 -
[20]
Just to interject, I think endeavour x is doing it wrong.
---
Quote: Welcome to EVE, a PvP game where people are - shockingly - allowed to PvP as much as they like.
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Joe Starbreaker
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Posted - 2008.05.15 21:55:00 -
[21]
Originally by: Amplify Any chance of some more on-topic replies, perhaps somebody even taking me up on my offer?
If you are really that into submission, you should have rolled a female avatar. You want somebody to make your ugly mug a slave, you should pay them. TBH the OP gives me the creeps.
---------------- [insert signature here] |
Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 22:03:00 -
[22]
Originally by: Joe Starbreaker
Originally by: Amplify Any chance of some more on-topic replies, perhaps somebody even taking me up on my offer?
If you are really that into submission, you should have rolled a female avatar. You want somebody to make your ugly mug a slave, you should pay them. TBH the OP gives me the creeps.
I prefer "servant", not "slave". Besides, nobody complains about the looks of the Minmatar when it comes to this sort of thing, do they? >.> ------------------------------
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Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.15 23:39:00 -
[23]
WTB: Inteligent, on-topic replies. |
Erotic Irony
0bsession
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Posted - 2008.05.15 23:43:00 -
[24]
pretty good scam, teddy br ftw strikes again ___ Eve Players are not very smart. Support Killmail Overhaul
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GrEy FoX2t7
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Posted - 2008.05.15 23:55:00 -
[25]
ok
You say you want me to supply ships but not the skills to fly them?
I demand you buy and start training immediately upon hiring
Caldari carrier Caldari dread Amarr carrier Amarr dread Minmatar carrier Minmatar dread
and
Amarr titan
i will hire u until you train all of them i will pay you in skillbooks though they will be all non-capital skillbooks and < 10 per-month
Deal?
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Element 22
Gallente
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Posted - 2008.05.16 00:05:00 -
[26]
Three Laws of Amplify
/|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|\ / || It's a truss bridge O.O |
Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.16 00:23:00 -
[27]
Originally by: Erotic Irony pretty good scam, teddy br ftw strikes again
You can believe what you like, but i'm not out to scam anybody. I have every skill i'd need to be a carrier pilot, cept the important two. This is merely an unusual way for me to earn them. |
Amplify
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2008.05.16 00:24:00 -
[28]
Originally by: GrEy FoX2t7 ok
You say you want me to supply ships but not the skills to fly them?
I demand you buy and start training immediately upon hiring
Caldari carrier Caldari dread Amarr carrier Amarr dread Minmatar carrier Minmatar dread
and
Amarr titan
i will hire u until you train all of them i will pay you in skillbooks though they will be all non-capital skillbooks and < 10 per-month
Deal?
No, I refer you to rule 4. Also, my price is set in stone. |
DubanFP
Caldari Four Rings Phalanx Alliance
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Posted - 2008.05.16 00:25:00 -
[29]
Originally by: Amplify Okay, I've just spent the last 2 hours trying to decide which section to post in
And yet you still didn't manage to decide on the character & timecode bazaar... _______________
ReiAyanami> We bring you tidings of AARRRRRRRRR |
Element 22
Gallente
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Posted - 2008.05.16 00:27:00 -
[30]
Stone eh? Well that won't be a problem seeing as how I have blasters that tear through tritium. So let's see here, you want a Gallente Carrier, a little to the left...and...problem solved, ok, so one Gallente Car for 1 months service.
No need to thank me, just doing my job
/|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|X|\ / || It's a truss bridge O.O |
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