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Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 1 post(s) |
Sylithr
Caldari Grey Legion Corporation
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Posted - 2008.09.23 13:15:00 -
[1]
Edited by: Sylithr on 23/09/2008 13:16:19 I found some very funny product warnings that I thought I would share:
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity. Grey Legion |
Sylithr
Caldari Grey Legion Corporation
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Posted - 2008.09.23 13:15:00 -
[2]
Edited by: Sylithr on 23/09/2008 13:16:19 I found some very funny product warnings that I thought I would share:
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap,"
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity. Grey Legion |
Jacob Mei
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Posted - 2008.09.23 14:12:00 -
[3]
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
What would the other use even be? -------------------------------- To borrow a phrase:
Players who post are like stars, there are bright ones and those who are dim.
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Micheal Dietrich
Caldari Terradyne Networks
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Posted - 2008.09.23 14:42:00 -
[4]
Sadly, most of these are real. They have to put them there because some idiot will attempt this, get hurt, and sue.
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Zaphod Jones
Minmatar Heretic Militia
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Posted - 2008.09.23 15:57:00 -
[5]
http://www.mlaw.org/wwl/year9photos.html http://www.mlaw.org/wwl/year10photos.html http://www.mlaw.org/wwl/photos.html
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Liu Kaskakka
PAK
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Posted - 2008.09.23 18:04:00 -
[6]
Originally by: Micheal Dietrich Sadly, most of these are real. They have to put them there because some idiot will attempt this, get hurt, and sue.
Luckily that only works in a country where it's ok for an adult to have the mental capabilities of an infant. King Liu is RIGHT!!
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kor anon
Amarr Sons Of The Fallen BROTHERS GRIM.
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Posted - 2008.09.23 18:15:00 -
[7]
Health and safety ***s at work here
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Wendat Huron
Stellar Solutions
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Posted - 2008.09.23 18:18:00 -
[8]
Originally by: Liu Kaskakka
Originally by: Micheal Dietrich Sadly, most of these are real. They have to put them there because some idiot will attempt this, get hurt, and sue.
Luckily that only works in a country where it's ok for an adult to have the mental capabilities of an infant.
I resent the term infant, we'd like to refer to them as special americans.
These forums are FUBAR, upgrade this decade! |
kor anon
Amarr Sons Of The Fallen BROTHERS GRIM.
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Posted - 2008.09.23 18:27:00 -
[9]
^ I on the other hand think they're ****ing morons
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Akita T
Caldari Navy Volunteer Task Force
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Posted - 2008.09.23 19:22:00 -
[10]
I'd put a generic label on everything:
"WARNING : if you have to read this warning label for actual directions on how to use this product, do not use the product. On second thought, don't even touch it. WE will sue YOU if you do so."
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SHOPS || Mission rewards revamp || better nanofix
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F'nog
Amarr Celestial Horizon Corp. Celestial Industrial Alliance
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Posted - 2008.09.23 22:15:00 -
[11]
On a package of shrimp -- "Warning: Contains Shrimp"
Originally by: Kazuma Saruwatari
F'nog for Amarr Emperor. Nuff said
Originally by: Chribba Go F'nog! You're a hero! Not a Zero! /me bows
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Arvald
Caldari Ninjas N Pirates
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Posted - 2008.09.23 23:23:00 -
[12]
ok now im not saying stupidity should be a capital offence, but cant we just remove the warning lables off of everything and let the problem solve itself?
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CCP Tenitigo
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Posted - 2008.09.24 00:43:00 -
[13]
One of my favorites has always been on the Eve Online box from when the game was first released.
Warning! Your new life may be too addictive to leave.
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P'uck
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Posted - 2008.09.24 01:11:00 -
[14]
I got something I thought that was really funny. A friend of mine got himself a TV dinner. You know, some stuff that comes in this little plastic trays you can use when you dont want a real platter, because you ain't got no dishwasher or just plain lazy. You put it in the microwave oven for about 2 minutes and you got your dinner.
And under "serving suggestions" it said something like: Optionally add shii-take mushrooms and some dill-sauce.
I nearly ****ed my pants laughing...
Also, what never ceases to amaze me, is this: Freaked me out the first time I saw it. And yes, that thing is real.
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soldieroffortune 258
Gallente Trinity Council
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Posted - 2008.09.24 02:17:00 -
[15]
Originally by: CCP Tenitigo One of my favorites has always been on the Eve Online box from when the game was first released.
Warning! Your new life may be too addictive to leave.
i endorse this warning
i almost slipped into this when i first created my account, and am still recovering
Originally by: soldieroffortune 258
"Eve is about making yourself richer while making the other guy poorer"
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soldieroffortune 258
Gallente Trinity Council
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Posted - 2008.09.24 02:25:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Micheal Dietrich Sadly, most of these are real. They have to put them there because some idiot will attempt this, get hurt, and sue.
and its pathetic that sometimes they win
one of thse most ******ed lawsuits that ive read about:
some guy was scouting out an old couple's home for an entire month, waiting for the right time to break in, he was going through their trash finding papers, stealing their mail, ect. and he found out that they were going on a three week cruise, and decided thats when he would break in
he breaks in through a garage window after they leave and discover theyve locked the house up to tight
he gets stuck in the garage and cant get out, and has to survive off of dog food while they are gone
when they get back, they find him in the garage, call police, they come arrest him, ect
when he gets to court he decides HE wants to sue THEM for "wrongful imprisonment" WTF?????
and then he wins
im not sure how much he got, but its total horseshit that he did, i mean seriously, he broke into their house, went through their trash, read their mail, and broke the **** in and he gets MONEY For it? its just
uggghh, what the hell is this world coming to?
i also find it stupid that if you see someone walking out of your house w/ your safe and they are in your backyard, you cant get them for breaking and entering OR burglary because you didnt see them INSIDE your house (despite the fact they were walking out w/ your ****ing safe) the most you can get them for is trespassing, which is a misdemeanor, which is horseshit as well
/rant off
sorry, but like i said, what is this world coming to?
Originally by: soldieroffortune 258
"Eve is about making yourself richer while making the other guy poorer"
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Smokie McLottapot
Caldari Keepers Of The Gate
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Posted - 2008.09.24 04:39:00 -
[17]
Originally by: CCP Tenitigo One of my favorites has always been on the Eve Online box from when the game was first released.
Warning! Your new life may be too addictive to leave.
Warning! Objects in box may be laggier than they appear!
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IR Scoutar
Caldari State War Academy
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Posted - 2008.09.24 05:11:00 -
[18]
hers some more of these
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.
On a toboggan: Beware: Sledge may develop high speed under certain snow conditions.
On a knife sharpener: Caution: knives are sharp.
On shin pads for cyclists: Shin guards cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.
On a take away coffee cup: Caution: Hot beverages are hot.
Emergency safety procedures at a US summer camp: In case of flood, proceed uphill. In case of flash flood proceed uphill quickly.
In a microwave oven manual: Do not use for drying pets.
On the back of a pilot's seat in a Nato aircraft: Seat must be facing forward for take-off and landing.
On the bottom of a cola bottle: Do not open here.
On a Harry Potter wizards broom: This broom does not actually fly.
On a box of aspirin: Do not take if allergic to aspirin.
On a bottle of laundry detergent: Remove clothing before distributing in washing machine.
On a muffin packet: Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat.
In a kettle instruction manual: The appliance is switched on by setting the 'ON/OFF' button to the 'ON' position.
On a ketchup bottle: Instructions: Put on food.
On a bottle of rum: Open bottle before drinking.
A car park sign: Entrance only. Do not enter.
A sign in a street in Hong Kong: Beware of people.
Rules on a tram in Prague: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be persecuted.
Sign on newly-renovated ramp entrance, USA: Take care: new non-slip surface.
On a can of air freshener: For use by trained personnel only.
On a bottle of baby lotion: Keep away from children.
On a pair of socks bought in egypt: Do not wash.
On a 500-piece jigsaw puzzle: Some assembly required.
On a can of pepper spray used for self defense: May irritate eyes.
On a Frisbee: Warning: may contain small parts.
In a car handbook: In order to get out of car, open door, get out lock doors, and then close doors.
On a packet of cashew nut pieces: Warning: This product may contain residue of nuts.
Directions for mosquito repellant: Replacing battery: replace old battery with a new one.
On a birthday card for a one year old: Not suitable for children aged under 36 months or less.
In a hotel bedroom: Please do not turn on TV except when in use.
In a lift in a Japanese hotel: Push this button in case anything happens.
On a toilet cleaning brush: Do not use orally.
On a can of Spray paint: Do not spray in your face.
On a TV remote: Not Dishwasher safe.
On a blowtorch: Not used for drying hair.
On a washing machine inn a launderette: No small children.
On a bottle of hair dye: Do not use as Ice Cream topping.
On a push along lawn mower: Not to be used as a hedge trimmer.
On a box of fireworks: Do not put in mouth.
On the packaging for a wrist watch: Warning this is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants.
In a dishwasher manual: Do not allow children to play in dishwasher.
On a toaster: Do not use underwater.
On a mattress: Do not attempt to swallow.
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Akita T
Caldari Navy Volunteer Task Force
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Posted - 2008.09.24 05:17:00 -
[19]
Originally by: P'uck TV dinner [...] under "serving suggestions" it said something like: Optionally add shii-take mushrooms and some dill-sauce. I nearly ****ed my pants laughing...
Can, umm, you know... somebody explain this to me ? I mean, I might lack the cultural background, but to me it looks completely harmless.
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SHOPS || Mission rewards revamp || better nanofix
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Sylithr
Caldari Grey Legion Corporation
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Posted - 2008.09.24 05:17:00 -
[20]
Quote: In a microwave oven manual: Do not use for drying pets.
So that's why my puppies keep exploding. Grey Legion |
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P'uck
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Posted - 2008.09.24 05:18:00 -
[21]
Edited by: P''uck on 24/09/2008 05:27:48
Originally by: Akita T
Originally by: P'uck TV dinner [...] under "serving suggestions" it said something like: Optionally add shii-take mushrooms and some dill-sauce. I nearly ****ed my pants laughing...
Can, umm, you know... somebody explain this to me ? I mean, I might lack the cultural background, but to me it looks completely harmless.
If you're going to slam a tv dinner down your intestines, how likely is it you can be arsed to **** around with shii-take and dill?
edit: op had something like "defrost". ok. defrost. I can be bothered to defrost my 2-minute food. but the irony behind the suggestion to add mushrooms and funky spices...
man, if you regularily eat microwave food, chances are you dont even have salt and pepper at home (at least where I come from, maybe that's the lacking cultural background )
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Akita T
Caldari Navy Volunteer Task Force
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Posted - 2008.09.24 05:28:00 -
[22]
Edited by: Akita T on 24/09/2008 05:31:36
Originally by: P'uck If you're going to slam a tv dinner down your intestines, how likely is it you can be arsed to **** around with shii-take and dill?
Oh... that Well, you never know, somebody might have those in "canned" form somewhere in the fridge Yeah... unlikely, and if they do have'em they might have put'em on anyway (since they must probably like those things to have'em in the fridge in the first place).
Still... not all TV-dinners are that bad... or are they ? I never tried one myself. Actually, I don't even know where to get one. Stores around here don't tend to have stuff like that on stock. Almost everybody cooks their food on the stove around here. Heck, I never even owned a microwave (never really liked how they "cook" stuff... CDs on the other hand...), and not many acquaintances have one either... gas-powered stoves/ovens on the other hand, now that almost everybody has one. I usually have all sorts of fruits, vegetables and various spices around the house tho'.
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SHOPS || Mission rewards revamp || better nanofix
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P'uck
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Posted - 2008.09.24 05:41:00 -
[23]
Same with my friend. He is a real good cook. But sometimes, especially on lengthy gaming sessions, there is no real time for proper food. You just get up between two rounds, throw somehting in a machine, wait, and tadaaaa.
And we KNOW this. We celebrate this "quick and dirty" mentality, when we don't feel like hanging around in the kitchen for an hour. No problem with that.
But printing something about exotic mushrooms on the packaging, thats a bit of an insult. It's like the manufacturer saying "in yo face, junkie, i know exactly how ****ed up the contents of your fridge are, but you know what? people like us, we EAT REAL FOOD!"
I cant help it, it cracks me up everytime Guess I'm a weirdo...
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Mutabae
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Posted - 2008.09.24 06:53:00 -
[24]
On the side of a McDonald's Iced Coffee: 'Warning! Cold Beverage!'
Does that mean someone was injured by the horrid tasting coffee and ice mixture they put in the transparent cup?? Was someone surprised their Iced Coffee was in fact cold? Are people truly that stupid?
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P'uck
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Posted - 2008.09.24 06:56:00 -
[25]
Well, I guess it all comes down to those crazy yanks and their stellas...
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Akita T
Caldari Navy Volunteer Task Force
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Posted - 2008.09.24 10:05:00 -
[26]
Originally by: Mutabae Are people truly that stupid?
Sadly, YES. Some are. And worse, they think about themselves as being slightly above average (or, "at worst, about average").
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SHOPS || Mission rewards revamp || better nanofix
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Flash Bombardo
Minmatar
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Posted - 2008.09.24 11:06:00 -
[27]
Edited by: Flash Bombardo on 24/09/2008 11:06:32 On a bag of peanuts: Warning may contain nuts.
Edit:Sorry, been done earlier in thread etc etc
"I have not problem with prostitute, but the kiddy dools is to much for me" - Orcan |
Dr Slaughter
Minmatar Rabies Inc.
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Posted - 2008.09.24 11:25:00 -
[28]
Quote: On a mattress: Do not attempt to swallow.
THAT... that.. that's a classic. ~~~~ There is no parody in this thread. Honest. |
Dantes Revenge
Caldari
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Posted - 2008.09.24 11:37:00 -
[29]
Edited by: Dantes Revenge on 24/09/2008 11:37:49
It's not just safety labels either. In the UK, a common medication for those who suffer from depression is amitryptiline{sp}. When you look under the side effects list, one side effect is depression
I think the funniest one I saw was on a tin of peanut sauce: "Warning: This product may contain traces of nuts."
'May contain nuts' is a warning I'd expect to see stamped on many Asian women and if you've been there, you'll know what I mean. Katoi anyone?
Edit: typo -- There's a simple difference between kinky and perverted. Kinky is using a feather to get her in the mood. Perverted is using the whole chicken. |
kor anon
Amarr Sons Of The Fallen BROTHERS GRIM.
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Posted - 2008.09.24 14:51:00 -
[30]
Originally by: soldieroffortune 258
stuff
the dangers of beaurocracy right here
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