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Author |
Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 1 post(s) |
Fangedterror
Caldari Alarius Elementum EvE Consortium
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Posted - 2009.01.20 02:18:00 -
[1]
Im in the mood to laugh tonight. So please post your eve jokes. I started you guys off with some of the corniest jokes i could think of.
---------yo mama jokes------------
Yo mamas is so fat it took me 1 second to target her.
Yo mamas so fat she needs to be cynoed to the store
Yo mamas so fat when she jumped through the gate she crashed the node
Yo mamas so fat you can anchor a pos next to her
-------------Eve pick up line--------------------
Hey baby is you dad an Ore Theif? Because he must have stolen all the Arkanor out of the belts and put them in your eyes.
--------jokes----------
Q. How many BoB pilots Does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Depends on how long it takes for CCP to arrive
Q. How many CVA pilots does it take to defend their space? A. Who knows its never been done
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Khemul Zula
Amarr Keisen Trade League
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Posted - 2009.01.20 02:19:00 -
[2]
CAOD
------ I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it. |
Dirk Magnum
Royal Hiigaran Navy
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Posted - 2009.01.20 02:20:00 -
[3]
Rocket bonus.
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Qordel
Caldari School of Applied Knowledge
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Posted - 2009.01.20 02:35:00 -
[4]
Edited by: Qordel on 20/01/2009 02:36:36
My EVE: Share your EVE videos, guides, resources, songs, jokes and more!
--
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Muhammed Jafar
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Posted - 2009.01.20 02:56:00 -
[5]
How many terrible poasts does it take win EVE?
I don't know, but I'm well on my way! |
BiggestT
Caldari Resurrection Skunk-Works
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Posted - 2009.01.20 02:58:00 -
[6]
Yo mamma so fat, when she docks, the station cries "Be Gentle.."
Yo mamma so fat, she has to jump twice
Yo mamma so fat, her gravity pulls ships out of warp
Yo mamma so fat, she ate Jita
Yo mamma so fat, she has her own sov.
I can continue if the need arises :) |
Armoured C
Gallente Federation of Freedom Fighters Executive Outcomes
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Posted - 2009.01.20 03:04:00 -
[7]
caldari
almiright? |
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CCP Mitnal
C C P CCP
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Posted - 2009.01.20 03:18:00 -
[8]
Moved to MY EVE. |
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Barak Tor
Legion of Black Mesa United Freemen Alliance
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Posted - 2009.01.20 05:00:00 -
[9]
Originally by: Armoured C caldari
almiright?
^^This |
Mithfindel
Gallente Zenko Group
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Posted - 2009.01.20 07:50:00 -
[10]
Two True Amarr and a Brutor arrive to a bar. The Amarr are carrying the Brutor in a chair. The bartender asks: "Is this some kind of a joke?"
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MOFO 450
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Posted - 2009.01.20 15:56:00 -
[11]
A firbolg goes to the RnD agent, looking ill, and says "I really don't feel well, i am tired all the time, i dont know what to do"
So the RnD agent says "Well, let me take a bit of your hull and i will send it off for tests"
Next week the firbolg returns, still complaining of the same symptoms, and the agent has some bad news: "There is no easy way to say this... but you are HIV positive"
The firbolg is shocked. "HIV!! I am a fighter! Not a lover! How can that possibly be?!"
The RnD agent solemnly replies "I am sorry... but one of your parents must have been a carrier"
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Arouu
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Posted - 2009.01.20 23:03:00 -
[12]
Originally by: MOFO 450 A firbolg goes to the RnD agent, looking ill, and says "I really don't feel well, i am tired all the time, i dont know what to do"
So the RnD agent says "Well, let me take a bit of your hull and i will send it off for tests"
Next week the firbolg returns, still complaining of the same symptoms, and the agent has some bad news: "There is no easy way to say this... but you are HIV positive"
The firbolg is shocked. "HIV!! I am a fighter! Not a lover! How can that possibly be?!"
The RnD agent solemnly replies "I am sorry... but one of your parents must have been a carrier"
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d3vo
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Posted - 2009.01.21 16:40:00 -
[13]
lawlz, keep them coming __________ \(^.^)/ |
Sarkiss
Imperial Academy
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Posted - 2009.01.21 19:12:00 -
[14]
Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love.
The first woman said, "My husband is a marriage counselor, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that."
The second woman proclaimed, "My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough, I like that."
The third woman replied, "Well my husband works for CCP and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it's going to be when I get it.
A classic.
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Beardponderer
You're Doing It Wrong
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Posted - 2009.01.21 21:12:00 -
[15]
Devo is a woman!
----------------------------------------------
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Caveat Emptor1
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Posted - 2009.01.22 09:28:00 -
[16]
Edited by: Caveat Emptor1 on 22/01/2009 09:28:11 What is pirates favorite breakfast?
Scrambled egg
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Lexa Hellfury
Incura
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Posted - 2009.01.22 09:48:00 -
[17]
q. How many CCP does it take to change a light bulb?
a. 1 team to implement the change, one to make a forum post informing the players of the change, one to make a post on the login screen, one to lock the thread about the change after it reaches 50 pages, one to make a new thread about the change, and one to ninja edit the "features" page. |
News R3porter
THE INTERNET.
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Posted - 2009.01.22 11:48:00 -
[18]
pick up line
hey baby im like a celestis, i can make u damp from accross the room Providing eve with unbiased news |
Catturday
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Posted - 2009.01.22 20:08:00 -
[19]
y0 m0mma's so fat BOB took her for a region and then abandoned her.
(Ok, scretch the abandoned part.)
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Wired
Caldari Provisions
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Posted - 2009.01.22 20:49:00 -
[20]
Edited by: Wired on 22/01/2009 20:54:28 A couple more 'yo mamma' lines...
Yo mama is so fat she takes up 2 contracts Yo mama is so fat it's not possible to calculate the effects of target painting. Yo mama is so fat her pod is a titan Yo mama is so fat I've petitioned her for exploiting
Why did the Dev cross the road? I'm sorry the logs show nothing
I'll probably be back with more crappy jokes later (you have been warned) |
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BuIIseye
Amarr Pax Amarria Corp
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Posted - 2009.01.23 03:36:00 -
[21]
Q. How many Goon pilots does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. 109
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wickedpheonix
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Posted - 2009.01.23 04:38:00 -
[22]
-How many carebears does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Three - one to screw it in, one to screw it back in after it falls out, and one to complain about this magical fantastic ghost called "gravity" that keeps disrupting the carebears' mining.
How many people does it take to lag Jita up? One - your momma.
How many CCP does it take to get Ambulation done? Three - one to brag about how it's almost done on the forums, one to get the final touches done, and one to ninja delete it every night so that it can keep on being delayed.
How does a pirate put the fear of God into a carebear? Just shows up.
A Gallente and a Caldari walk into a bar. Caldari orders a water, Gallente orders a beer. Gallente asks Caldari why he's not having a drink, Caldari answers - "Oh I am having a drink - I'm drinking that beer on the table soon as I short-circuit your drones with this here water!"
Sorry if I've made you take a drill to the temple... :P
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Halsoy
Gallente Shade. Penumbra Alliance
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Posted - 2009.01.23 12:58:00 -
[23]
Ok, I don't have anything fancy stuff, so I'll just take this one.
If You're Happy And You Know It - Pod Amarr If you cannot find Caldari, Pod Amarr If the Minnie are frisky, Gallente is looking shifty, Jovians are too risky, Pod Amarr.
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Phantom Slave
JUDGE DREAD Inc.
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Posted - 2009.01.23 18:36:00 -
[24]
Originally by: Halsoy Ok, I don't have anything fancy stuff, so I'll just take this one.
If You're Happy And You Know It - Pod Amarr If you cannot find Caldari, Pod Amarr If the Minnie are frisky, Gallente is looking shifty, Jovians are too risky, Pod Amarr.
Very clever! No wait, don't pod m...*wakes up in station* ah son of a *****!
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Betray
Caldari The Substitutes
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Posted - 2009.01.24 02:18:00 -
[25]
caldari pvp solo success
now pick 3 |
LTD THOR
Liga Freier Terraner G00DFELLAS
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Posted - 2009.01.24 03:25:00 -
[26]
Edited by: LTD THOR on 24/01/2009 03:25:40 Yo mamas so fat that she will get an own region name next patch.
:S
Originally by: Bob Marley "..weŚre jammin, i hope you like jammin, too"
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Hsuan Tsang
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Posted - 2009.02.02 16:24:00 -
[27]
Scotty walks into a hangar and see's a pod pilot with a stack of scaffold poles and duct tape, and asks "Whatcha doing with all that in my hangar?" "Building me a ship" "You can't build a ship with just duct tape and scaffold tubes" "Why not," replies the pilot"The Minmatar have been doing it for years"
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Rordan D'Kherr
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Posted - 2009.02.02 16:34:00 -
[28]
Once I met a trustworthy BoB member ...
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Mang0o
Caldari coracao ardente
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Posted - 2009.02.02 18:33:00 -
[29]
CCP
I love you Mang0o, take a guess why -Eris |
Hondri
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Posted - 2009.02.03 15:51:00 -
[30]
Atlas alliance
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