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Muck Raker
Gutter Press
44
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Posted - 2011.10.20 19:13:00 -
[1] - Quote
Amazing news reaches Gutter Press of sensational goings on in Pator!
A Minmatar pilot reported that the Navy asked them to investigate some unusual activity:
In her own words: It was totally weird, dudette, I was just like, thinking they'd send me out to poke some Angel cartel dudes or something, but then the agent turns around and says "We've been getting a number of reports from in and around this system regarding "unidentified alien spacecraft". Sightings of weird-looking people have even come in from planetary surfaces.Theories abound, and people are saying it's the Jovians, or even one of the Ancients: Takhmal, Yan Jung, any number of things. A few folks even think it's some new alien race making an appearance." So, I go out and there's these things, with tentacles, like rogue drones, but different. But then, after all that, I get told that "Navy Intelligence has stepped in and told us to halt any further investigation, so I guess we'll just have to wonder, for now, at least. But we'll get some answers eventually, I'm sure." So I was like, confused, cos aliens are totally weird.
Gutter Press spoke to several Navy and Republic Security Service people about this issue, but no replies were forthcoming, indicating the incident may have been covered up entirely!
Reactions from the public were mixed, with some in a combative mood: "Aliens? We'll beat them, same as we beat the Amarr, yeah!" said one young Minmatar woman. "I'd rather be abducted by aliens than by the Imperial Navy" said one older man.
Some were sceptical of the claims of aliens: "Weird looking people? I bet it's the Gallente. They wear all sorts of silliness" said a Seibestor woman. "These hallucinogens the Cartel push are a blight on society. Down with this sort of thing" said a Brutor man.
Gutter Press will continue to examine any claims of aliens. The Truth is Out There! |
Jason Galente
mishima ryu
64
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Posted - 2011.10.20 19:27:00 -
[2] - Quote
Just when i thought Gutter Press couldn't get any more ridiculous..
Sigh. Can you please cite your sources like most reliable journals? At least pretend like you're not just creating grandiose rumors.
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Astrid Stjerna
Teraa Matar
29
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Posted - 2011.10.20 19:41:00 -
[3] - Quote
Jason Galente wrote:Just when i thought Gutter Press couldn't get any more ridiculous..
Sigh. Can you please cite your sources like most reliable journals? At least pretend like you're not just creating grandiose rumors.
It's not a rumor. I was sent out after one of those things. Couldn't even get close to it, but it didn't move like any ship I've ever seen.
I have no idea who or what they are, but they never took any hostile action against me. They pretty well actively avoided my ship, in fact, and never responded to any of the standard first-contact protocols. |
Nakal Ashera
The Scope Gallente Federation
4
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Posted - 2011.10.20 22:28:00 -
[4] - Quote
Jason Galente wrote:Just when i thought Gutter Press couldn't get any more ridiculous..
Sigh. Can you please cite your sources like most reliable journals? At least pretend like you're not just creating grandiose rumors.
Captain Galente, have you thought that maybe Gutter Press's paticular style of journalism might just be a little tongue-in-cheek? |
Arkady Sadik
Gradient Electus Matari
136
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Posted - 2011.10.21 09:07:00 -
[5] - Quote
Quote:Sightings of weird-looking people Hm. I think this news story is 994 years late.
Quick note: The Republic has a Fleet, not a Navy. |
Daniel L'Siata
Don't Regret Until Next Keg Dragoons.
10
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Posted - 2011.10.21 11:01:00 -
[6] - Quote
Strange things are afoot, no doubt. Mind you, booster usage is also rampant this month. Take your pick. |
Hirana Yoshida
Behavioral Affront
73
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Posted - 2011.10.21 12:37:00 -
[7] - Quote
Muck Raker wrote:A Minmatar pilot reported ... Delusions, paranoia and other mental health related maladies are quite common when a person undergoes Vitoc withdrawal. Tell the pilot to report to the nearest 24th IC or Amarr Navy station and I am sure they'll be happy to help him get rid of the demons that are riding his poor soul. |
Jason Galente
mishima ryu
64
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Posted - 2011.10.21 12:58:00 -
[8] - Quote
Wall of text incoming.. |
Graelyn
Wolfsbrigade
26
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Posted - 2011.10.21 16:39:00 -
[9] - Quote
Finest Reporting in the Cluster! + Cardinal Graelyn +
Owner/Operator, "The Summit"
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I'm 5particus
REV0LTING
4
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Posted - 2011.10.21 18:06:00 -
[10] - Quote
These unknown foo-fighters are most likely Amarr black ops conducting illegal incursions into Republic space. |
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Tiberious Thessalonia
Majesty Theological Institute
9
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Posted - 2011.10.21 18:30:00 -
[11] - Quote
Clearly the result of swamp gas reflecting off of... er.
Okay, its a weather ball- oh wait, vacuum...
Hallucination brought on by overexposure to pod goo?
Yeah, I've got nothing. |
Edaine Numenor
Disciples of Ston
8
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Posted - 2011.10.21 19:48:00 -
[12] - Quote
Its the Paranid. They have invaded our cluster. |
Jason Galente
mishima ryu
66
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Posted - 2011.10.21 20:01:00 -
[13] - Quote
Ohhh, elephant in the room, time to use the dreaded T word..
Terrans. |
Rek Jaiga
Crimson Path
44
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Posted - 2011.10.21 20:22:00 -
[14] - Quote
Show me holofeed proof, or at least an image capture from your camera drones...something people.
I mean I'll tell you what, back when I did boosters I saw the oddest things when I was on X-sense and Soothsayer! Whoo! |
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