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Miss Uylear
Caldari The Gentlemen of Low Moral Fibre
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Posted - 2009.03.01 13:22:00 -
[1]
dug this out of my notes... copy and pasted here for a small communities pleasure.
XXXXXX > anyone near Eystur 2 asteriod belt 1 tell me where the Angel Cartel goons are?
*This young lady was in local channel wanting mission help, but made the dire mistake in not talking to her agent. So I stepped in to assist.
Miss Uylear > Hello. I am the Mission Help Officer of this system.
XXXXXX > I'm doing a mission where im to kill some gons here? cash flow for caspsuleers?
Miss Uylear > Ah, that can is the one you need to take the loot from, this brings the Angel cartel
XXXXXX > im sorry i thought maybe but wasnt sure and didnt want to get flagged....is that what they call it?
Miss Uylear > No, it is not madam
*She took the can and flashed. I waited abit then opened fire.
Miss Uylear > The angels are on their way, madam.
*still firing on her.
Miss Uylear > they should be here soon
*she died
XXXXXXX > wtf?
Miss Uylear > that was the angel rapid response team
XXXXXX > i thought you shot me XXXXXX > didnt you?
Miss Uylear > yes, I am the rapid response team, madam. Thus, the end of your mission is now here. congratulations.
XXXXXX > i think youre messing with me
*closed convo. no loot of any kind, but fun none the less.
And did anyone see my Welcome to EVE post in General?
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Captain Pompous
Is Right Even When He's Wrong So Deal With It
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Posted - 2009.03.01 13:26:00 -
[2]
haha, and yes, it was good :)
Yes, my name is Pompous. Yes, this has been designed for maximum deliberate effect. Sweet disclaimer eh |
Tzar'rim
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Posted - 2009.03.01 14:16:00 -
[3]
REALLY new players (not neccesarily saying this was one) have a valid excuse for not knowing the game, as they're new. I guess I'm a softie afterall
Self-proclaimed idiot
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Arcane Azmadi
Caldari First Flying Wing Inc Primary.
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Posted - 2009.03.02 03:00:00 -
[4]
Edited by: Arcane Azmadi on 02/03/2009 03:00:28 Im sorry, you ****ed with a genuine noob just for the sadistic lulz?
1. What was the point? You admitted you didn't get anything from it. 2. You may have convinced them to quit the game as soon as they started, which is NOT a good thing. They'll tell all their friends how much EVE sucks too, because it's full of *******s. 3. Again, what was the point? 4. So they're a noob. Noobs can be forgiven for falling for easy tricks. Doesn't mean you have to punish them for being new. 5. Once again, what was the mother****ing point?!
You're a sadist and and genuinely bad person both ingame and in RL and I hope something seriously horrible happens to you in real life as soon as possible. Please tell us about it when it happens, assuming you don't end up in a coma, so we can laugh at YOU.
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Jones Bones
Tipping the Velvet
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Posted - 2009.03.02 03:05:00 -
[5]
If they learned something from this event, then EvE is a game for them. If they raged quit and told all their friends how they were going to "level up" and pwn you one day, then....well this is still the game for them. =================== Go Bucks! |
Artemis Rose
Sileo In Pacis
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Posted - 2009.03.02 04:17:00 -
[6]
I can't wait until I can PvP like this!!! *** Currently Playing: Trolls from Outer Space Current Equipment: VISAcard chain mail, +2 Amulet of Epic Whine, Self Banstick +2 WTB: +666 E-peen killboard stats |
K1RTH G3RS3N
Haunted House BROTHERS GRIM.
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Posted - 2009.03.02 04:20:00 -
[7]
ahahaha i genuinely lold at that one. thnx
now, post the killmail and lets see what frigate or noobship he/she lost
Pledge your support |
Decimus Caedrius
Minmatar Decimus Corp
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Posted - 2009.03.02 04:22:00 -
[8]
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 1. What was the point? You admitted you didn't get anything from it.
A. Not everything has a point. Sometimes, we just...do things
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 2. You may have convinced them to quit the game as soon as they started, which is NOT a good thing. They'll tell all their friends how much EVE sucks too, because it's full of *******s.
A. Or maybe...just maybe, this person realized they got owned with a P, and decided to stick around in the vain of getting their tormentor back. If they quit so easily, this isn't their game.
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 3. Again, what was the point?
A. Midgets.
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 4. So they're a noob. Noobs can be forgiven for falling for easy tricks. Doesn't mean you have to punish them for being new.
A. Guess the military would be better served by always being nice to the recruits in boot camp, hmmm?
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 5. Once again, what was the mother****ing point?!
A. I'm sorry, did you say something? I thought I heard the mewling of a kitten....
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi You're a sadist and and genuinely bad person both ingame and in RL and I hope something seriously horrible happens to you in real life as soon as possible. Please tell us about it when it happens, assuming you don't end up in a coma, so we can laugh at YOU.
Aw...such sweet things you say.
Quote: sLaughter is the best medicine!
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Misanth
RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE Black Legion.
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Posted - 2009.03.02 05:13:00 -
[9]
Originally by: Tzar'rim I guess I'm a softie
Saving for future (ab)use. -
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Normin Bates
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Posted - 2009.03.02 05:39:00 -
[10]
Nothing wrong with teaching lessons...as long as you make it a lesson.
For best effect I tell them the mistake they made, how to avoid other similar mistakes and then tell them to check their wallet (which will show a large transfer from me) |
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Alowishus
the united Negative Ten.
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Posted - 2009.03.02 05:54:00 -
[11]
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 2. You may have convinced them to quit the game as soon as they started, which is NOT a good thing.
**** them then. When I started I mined into an Ibis, and then Bantam, hauling each load back individually for hours to get a Merlin. I then did a mission which took me to a 0.4 system. Another pilot was camping the spawn point (back then missions spawned in the same place each time). He quickly killed me.
Do you know how I felt? VENGEFUL. If you get killed early on and you emoragequit then this game wasn't for you to begin with. You're supposed to get mad and work very hard to become a better PvPer, amass wealth to buy ships and then go out kick some ass. If you want this then Eve is for you.
Of course there are bears who have zero interest in PvP and will quit and they always say, "Eve needs bears for the blah blah blah..." which may be true but what they don't realize is that for every bear that wants to emoragequit there are ten more ready to take their place. Us bloodthirsty folks which make the game interesting are few and far between.
/makes fart noise |
Landrassa
Friendly Neighbourhood Extortion Company
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Posted - 2009.03.02 06:44:00 -
[12]
Originally by: Alowishus
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 2. You may have convinced them to quit the game as soon as they started, which is NOT a good thing.
**** them then. When I started I mined into an Ibis, and then Bantam, hauling each load back individually for hours to get a Merlin. I then did a mission which took me to a 0.4 system. Another pilot was camping the spawn point (back then missions spawned in the same place each time). He quickly killed me.
Do you know how I felt? VENGEFUL. If you get killed early on and you emoragequit then this game wasn't for you to begin with. You're supposed to get mad and work very hard to become a better PvPer, amass wealth to buy ships and then go out kick some ass. If you want this then Eve is for you.
Of course there are bears who have zero interest in PvP and will quit and they always say, "Eve needs bears for the blah blah blah..." which may be true but what they don't realize is that for every bear that wants to emoragequit there are ten more ready to take their place. Us bloodthirsty folks which make the game interesting are few and far between.
Ahh, the good old days, sitting in a Bantam as a 3 day old char in...Kemerk I think it was. Mining into a can, some ship shows up and pop goes my can.
I sat there for a bit thinking to myself: "holy ****, you can do that in this game? that's...just awesome"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Nice corp you got there...would be a shame if something happened to it. |
Junko Togawa
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Posted - 2009.03.02 08:04:00 -
[13]
Originally by: Alowishus Of course there are bears who have zero interest in PvP and will quit and they always say, "Eve needs bears for the blah blah blah..." which may be true but what they don't realize is that for every bear that wants to emoragequit there are ten more ready to take their place. Us bloodthirsty folks which make the game interesting are few and far between.
I suppose the denizens of lo/nosec busy blowing each other to bits are few and far between, then. Oh wait, that's because most of them fund their yarrage with hisec play. I fergot that.
Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.
On a more serious note, I do agree somewhat with the sentiment. This game is well-documented. Anyone with a minimum of research can learn how to avoid 95% of the ability of others to grief them. Those who forget or fail to learn deserve what happens. BoB, anyone?
Originally by: Dreximus
Originally by: Alowishus These things make the game more exciting overall for people who enjoy risk and the ability to take responsibility for their own safety. At the risk of being cliche, th |
Friq
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Posted - 2009.03.02 11:25:00 -
[14]
Interesting ...
Isn't "I am the Mission Help Officer of this system." awfully close to ...
"a. Presents himself as a CCP employee, game master or other customer service representative, or a member of the EVE volunteer program."
...
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Lady Spank
Amarr Suddenly Whingers
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Posted - 2009.03.02 11:34:00 -
[15]
not really...
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Deq
Caldari State War Academy
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Posted - 2009.03.02 11:36:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Friq Interesting ...
Isn't "I am the Mission Help Officer of this system." awfully close to ...
"a. Presents himself as a CCP employee, game master or other customer service representative, or a member of the EVE volunteer program."
...
No, because there's no such thing as a 'Mission Help Officer'. One could also say "Hello my name is Santa Clause and I'm here to give you wonderful shiny things, just warp to planet 5 so I can jettison them for you." Less likely for someone to fall for it, but no difference in rules broken or not broken. Now if I created an alt named 'CCP Santa' and then did the same thing, I'd probably get banned. Clear enough? I hope not. |
Kira Valda
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Posted - 2009.03.02 11:42:00 -
[17]
Eve has obviously corrupted me. I used to think like Arcane Azmadi and would have been appalled you could do this to a noob. Now I just think "lol, that was funny".
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Tzar'rim
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Posted - 2009.03.02 11:48:00 -
[18]
I sometimes can flip newer players just to see how they react, if they start cussing out of control and shoot me they'll die. If they shoot me but act without being a ****** I'll get them down into low armor, open a convo and explain to them that attacking someone just because he nicked some ore might not always be a good thing and urge them to learn about the game by actually reading the forums. And then I warp off.
Self-proclaimed idiot
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Deq
Caldari State War Academy
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Posted - 2009.03.02 11:58:00 -
[19]
I sometimes can flip newer players just to see how they react, if they start cussing out of control and shoot me they'll die. If they shoot me but act without being a ****** I'll get them down into low armor, open a convo and explain to them that attacking someone just because he nicked some ore might not always be a good thing and urge them to learn about the game by actually reading the forums. And then I kill them and warp off. |
Alia Xi
Caldari
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Posted - 2009.03.02 12:11:00 -
[20]
I read the post I considered the post I read the comments I considered the comments I laughed my ass off, rightly or wrongly (What, it was just a bit funny, don't you think? Are you seriously telling me you didn't even smile?)
(Picture now with 100% more shameless blog plugging) |
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Vampasha
Space Piwates
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Posted - 2009.03.02 12:12:00 -
[21]
Originally by: Decimus Caedrius
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi 1. A. Or maybe...just maybe, this person realized they got owned with a P, and decided to stick around in the vain of getting their tormentor back.
Not likely, unless poster leaves high sec. -------------- I am Zsa Zsa of Borg. Prepare to be assimilated dahling |
H Lecter
Gallente The Black Rabbits The Gurlstas Associates
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Posted - 2009.03.02 12:21:00 -
[22]
Nice story. Keep them coming.
I remember when I was blown up in my first Vexor by a corp mate in a rifter. The guy had joined the corp the same day as me and I was - uhm, mining *blushes* - and fleeted him. I really hated him as he even podded me and I had no medical clone. I could have rage-quitted that day but I began to realize that I had been taught a valuable lesson about aggro mechanics and clone updating.
Shoot a noob today! It's only for educational purposes. One day they'll be grateful.
My opinion may or may not be shared by my alliance |
1Evildude
Gallente Beyond Divinity Inc
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Posted - 2009.03.02 13:09:00 -
[23]
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi Edited by: Arcane Azmadi on 02/03/2009 03:00:28 Im sorry, you ****ed with a genuine noob just for the sadistic lulz?
1. What was the point? You admitted you didn't get anything from it. 2. You may have convinced them to quit the game as soon as they started, which is NOT a good thing. They'll tell all their friends how much EVE sucks too, because it's full of *******s. 3. Again, what was the point? 4. So they're a noob. Noobs can be forgiven for falling for easy tricks. Doesn't mean you have to punish them for being new. 5. Once again, what was the mother****ing point?!
You're a sadist and and genuinely bad person both ingame and in RL and I hope something seriously horrible happens to you in real life as soon as possible. Please tell us about it when it happens, assuming you don't end up in a coma, so we can laugh at YOU.
ROFL!
I bet you write some lovely hatemails, I hope I can have the pleasure of podding your noob ass sometime and get a couple myself.
And to the OP, great job! Funny as hell
Mega Night Out!
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1Evildude
Gallente Beyond Divinity Inc
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Posted - 2009.03.02 13:12:00 -
[24]
Originally by: 1Evildude
ROFL!
I bet you write some lovely hatemails, I hope I can have the pleasure of podding your noob ass sometime and get a couple myself.
And to the OP, great job! Funny as hell
hey.. cool, I can say ass.
Mega Night Out!
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Misina Arlath
Amarr
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Posted - 2009.03.02 13:25:00 -
[25]
Edited by: Misina Arlath on 02/03/2009 13:25:27 I feel a slight twinge in my conscience when I shoot an obvious newbie.
But, based on their immediate reactions, I often reimburse them the ship, and also offer advice on fighting, how fights in EVE work (trans speeds, track speeds, optimals et.c.).
Then again, if they immediately attack me, wishing the rain of fire on me and my family et.c., I just ignore them and laugh at them.
If people can take the game for what it is, a game... where you sometimes lose your ship, then I'm more than willing to reimburse their loss and show them the ropes.
Seperates the real players from the whiners I guess :) -------------------------------------------------- "Every complex problem has a solution which is easy, neat and wrong!" |
Arcane Azmadi
Caldari First Flying Wing Inc Primary.
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Posted - 2009.03.02 13:45:00 -
[26]
Interesting... I wasn't expecting many people to take me seriously, but I was expecting at least ONE person to challenge my assertation that the OP is a genuinely bad person in RL. I guess I must have just been stating the obvious after all. I wasn't joking or merely ranting you know.
Originally by: 1Evildude
ROFL!
I bet you write some lovely hatemails, I hope I can have the pleasure of podding your noob ass sometime and get a couple myself.
No, I don't think you will. Because, see, I'm not a noob, and I don't think you'd do so well in a fight against someone who isn't 5,000,000 SP younger than you. Also, not being new to the game, I've already accepted death as a possibility and am aware that any traps I fall for are my own fault. I don't see the need to ***** about my own stupid mistakes, but I do get angry when people crow triumphantly about vicious, unwarranted bullying of others.
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Lady Spank
Amarr Suddenly Whingers
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Posted - 2009.03.02 14:00:00 -
[27]
I smell backpedalling on RL threats.
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Cletus Graeme
Caldari Duty.
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Posted - 2009.03.02 14:18:00 -
[28]
Edited by: Cletus Graeme on 02/03/2009 14:21:58
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi
You're a sadist and and genuinely bad person both ingame and in RL and I hope something seriously horrible happens to you in real life as soon as possible. Please tell us about it when it happens, assuming you don't end up in a coma, so we can laugh at YOU.
It's a game. Please shut up.
Originally by: Friq Interesting ... Isn't "I am the Mission Help Officer of this system." awfully close to ... "a. Presents himself as a CCP employee, game master or other customer service representative, or a member of the EVE volunteer program." ...
No. Not even close.
Originally by: Kira Valda Eve has obviously corrupted me. I used to think like Arcane Azmadi and would have been appalled you could do this to a noob. Now I just think "lol, that was funny".
Well, it was
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Kavu
Genos Occidere
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Posted - 2009.03.02 16:40:00 -
[29]
Originally by: Arcane Azmadi Interesting... I wasn't expecting many people to take me seriously, but I was expecting at least ONE person to challenge my assertation that the OP is a genuinely bad person in RL. I guess I must have just been stating the obvious after all. I wasn't joking or merely ranting you know.
Originally by: 1Evildude
ROFL!
I bet you write some lovely hatemails, I hope I can have the pleasure of podding your noob ass sometime and get a couple myself.
No, I don't think you will. Because, see, I'm not a noob, and I don't think you'd do so well in a fight against someone who isn't 5,000,000 SP younger than you. Also, not being new to the game, I've already accepted death as a possibility and am aware that any traps I fall for are my own fault. I don't see the need to ***** about my own stupid mistakes, but I do get angry when people crow triumphantly about vicious, unwarranted bullying of others.
so how does that 5,000,000 sp thing work if 75% of the chars in the game have far less than you, im a 2003 char does that mean i can only fight other 2003 chars?
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RedSplat
Heretic Army
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Posted - 2009.03.02 16:52:00 -
[30]
Originally by: Kavu
so how does that 5,000,000 sp thing work if 75% of the chars in the game have far less than you, im a 2003 char does that mean i can only fight other 2003 chars?
Time traveller say: Yes; but only if you have pvp set to on and accept the duel.
[i] Ransom List Project: http://www.eveonline.com/ingameboard.asp?a=topic&threadID=999677&page=1 |
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