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Always scan the belts carefully and listen to your b****

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markol	Posted - 2004.10.07 19:39:00 - [1] Edited by: markol on 07/10/2004 19:42:03 This is a bit late, as the events described in this story are about a week old or so. But I am bored at work and wanted to share a story with all the eve community. Also I need to resurect my "most megas lost in a week theme". Here goes... I think I have established that I have lost more megathrons in the course of the shortest amount of time. Find some of my sotries in earlier posts if you are interested in those. I decided that hunting people in megathrons and getting my ass kicked repeatedly was getting too expensive. I kitted out my thorax and went on killing sprees, killing frigates and cruisers. Since that is what most people fly around in low sec empire, I had plenty of prey. Then one day I come across a mining op. I take a seat at the planet, directionaly scan the belt and see that there are two megathrons and a hauler that keeps popping in and out of the belt. So I figure that the two megas must be minign happily away, and that one of them is probably half fitted for combat so that if anything comes in they can take them out. I figure that with all the drones that they have in their holds my rax will be pasted all over the can marked "veldspar full pick me up, carebear hauler" before I can even lock onto the first mega. So I make the wise decision to go back to my base of operation where my trusted megathron carrying the name "markol's Ibis" is stored. Note that this was the 8th incranation of megathron for me, as I lost 7 in the past. Prety good record for a 6 month old char. So I get my megathron, come back to the planet and scan the belt again, gleeing with excitement that my two megas have not left yet. I set course for the belt and warp in. The moment I come into the belt, I get a strange surprise that there is one more person in there then i expected. Sure enough I see my two megathrons sitting 30k from me. Then I notice that there is a raven not too far from them. A thought goes through my head: "raven's are not good miners, so wtf is he doing here?" You know that sinking feeling when your balls retract into the rest of your body and you just wnat to run away from your comp and hope that it will all end well? Yeah that's what I experienced that moment. Being a pirate, and having tracked the employment history of the raven to be 1 month less than me, I thought that my balls must be mistaken in their retraction, I MWD up to the raven, lock him up and start firing. The only problem is that I mwd right up to him. At that range all my guns are worthless as I am too close, even though we are both stopped. Thanks CCP, another great one. So I start shooting at him, in hopes that once I get past his shield, the rest will be easy. I let my drones lose, then I trigger my SB. and watch my drones pop, the remaining ones I quickly stick into my hold. My cap is disappearing fast. His shield seems stable. WTF omg I freak out. At the end there are torps and cruise hitting me from all sides, as well as drones of the raven and the two megathrons are hammering at me. Run I tell my ship, and yet there is nothing to run to as I am covered with roids on all sides. I am sure you know the outcome. My megathron along with all my blasters and all kinds of other crap becomes a significant portion of the Jaspet roid directly behind me, to be later examined by future school children. They will say: "Look you can see how the fat of his crew melted in with the bulkhead of the megathron, which in turn embedded itself in the roid." Some abstract artist will make a rendition of the wreckage. It will be a site to see for generations to come. All this happened for two reasons. 1. Always scan the belt and look carefully at who is sitting there. 2. Always trust your balls when they decide to retreat deep into your stomach cavity. If you start to notice them as high as your throat, you are definetly doing something wrong and should turn back immediately. There is a reason they say that men think with their ****s. That's where most of the reason resides. Oh and another thing, don't take a megathron in battle against a raven. But that is a minor point.
markol	Posted - 2004.10.07 19:39:00 - [2] Edited by: markol on 07/10/2004 19:42:03 This is a bit late, as the events described in this story are about a week old or so. But I am bored at work and wanted to share a story with all the eve community. Also I need to resurect my "most megas lost in a week theme". Here goes... I think I have established that I have lost more megathrons in the course of the shortest amount of time. Find some of my sotries in earlier posts if you are interested in those. I decided that hunting people in megathrons and getting my ass kicked repeatedly was getting too expensive. I kitted out my thorax and went on killing sprees, killing frigates and cruisers. Since that is what most people fly around in low sec empire, I had plenty of prey. Then one day I come across a mining op. I take a seat at the planet, directionaly scan the belt and see that there are two megathrons and a hauler that keeps popping in and out of the belt. So I figure that the two megas must be minign happily away, and that one of them is probably half fitted for combat so that if anything comes in they can take them out. I figure that with all the drones that they have in their holds my rax will be pasted all over the can marked "veldspar full pick me up, carebear hauler" before I can even lock onto the first mega. So I make the wise decision to go back to my base of operation where my trusted megathron carrying the name "markol's Ibis" is stored. Note that this was the 8th incranation of megathron for me, as I lost 7 in the past. Prety good record for a 6 month old char. So I get my megathron, come back to the planet and scan the belt again, gleeing with excitement that my two megas have not left yet. I set course for the belt and warp in. The moment I come into the belt, I get a strange surprise that there is one more person in there then i expected. Sure enough I see my two megathrons sitting 30k from me. Then I notice that there is a raven not too far from them. A thought goes through my head: "raven's are not good miners, so wtf is he doing here?" You know that sinking feeling when your balls retract into the rest of your body and you just wnat to run away from your comp and hope that it will all end well? Yeah that's what I experienced that moment. Being a pirate, and having tracked the employment history of the raven to be 1 month less than me, I thought that my balls must be mistaken in their retraction, I MWD up to the raven, lock him up and start firing. The only problem is that I mwd right up to him. At that range all my guns are worthless as I am too close, even though we are both stopped. Thanks CCP, another great one. So I start shooting at him, in hopes that once I get past his shield, the rest will be easy. I let my drones lose, then I trigger my SB. and watch my drones pop, the remaining ones I quickly stick into my hold. My cap is disappearing fast. His shield seems stable. WTF omg I freak out. At the end there are torps and cruise hitting me from all sides, as well as drones of the raven and the two megathrons are hammering at me. Run I tell my ship, and yet there is nothing to run to as I am covered with roids on all sides. I am sure you know the outcome. My megathron along with all my blasters and all kinds of other crap becomes a significant portion of the Jaspet roid directly behind me, to be later examined by future school children. They will say: "Look you can see how the fat of his crew melted in with the bulkhead of the megathron, which in turn embedded itself in the roid." Some abstract artist will make a rendition of the wreckage. It will be a site to see for generations to come. All this happened for two reasons. 1. Always scan the belt and look carefully at who is sitting there. 2. Always trust your balls when they decide to retreat deep into your stomach cavity. If you start to notice them as high as your throat, you are definetly doing something wrong and should turn back immediately. There is a reason they say that men think with their ****s. That's where most of the reason resides. Oh and another thing, don't take a megathron in battle against a raven. But that is a minor point.
RollinDutchMasters	Posted - 2004.10.07 19:43:00 - [3] I hearby award you the RollinDutchMasters award for least effective pirate ever, in honor of your continuing efforts to lose as many battleships as you possibly can to NPCers and miners. Go team gankage! Originally by: Sochin CCP has provided you with the tools you need to avoid crime. You're just too lazy/stupid to use them.
RollinDutchMasters	Posted - 2004.10.07 19:43:00 - [4] I hearby award you the RollinDutchMasters award for least effective pirate ever, in honor of your continuing efforts to lose as many battleships as you possibly can to NPCers and miners. Go team gankage! Originally by: Sochin CCP has provided you with the tools you need to avoid crime. You're just too lazy/stupid to use them.
markol	Posted - 2004.10.07 19:49:00 - [5] Originally by: RollinDutchMasters I hearby award you the RollinDutchMasters award for least effective pirate ever, in honor of your continuing efforts to lose as many battleships as you possibly can to NPCers and miners. Go team gankage! You know what the sad part is about this award? The person that killed me was named Flying Dutchman or something like that. Ironic perhaps? One thing though is that I still have about 60 kill mails so far. So I am killing, its just that I lose more ships and isk than I make from all the killing.
markol	Posted - 2004.10.07 19:49:00 - [6] Originally by: RollinDutchMasters I hearby award you the RollinDutchMasters award for least effective pirate ever, in honor of your continuing efforts to lose as many battleships as you possibly can to NPCers and miners. Go team gankage! You know what the sad part is about this award? The person that killed me was named Flying Dutchman or something like that. Ironic perhaps? One thing though is that I still have about 60 kill mails so far. So I am killing, its just that I lose more ships and isk than I make from all the killing.
JoCool	Posted - 2004.10.07 20:01:00 - [7] Dude, try it with a Thorax and some mates. Pain to read this
JoCool	Posted - 2004.10.07 20:01:00 - [8] Dude, try it with a Thorax and some mates. Pain to read this
DarkAlpha	Posted - 2004.10.07 20:05:00 - [9] Exelent story I enjoyed it! I'm also at work and your beautifull stories make my day go faster ... oooo look it is already 4pm cool 2 more hours to go! Why did you MWD your self in to him again? hmm strange tactics... you cant ram-damage another ship!!!! just a hint lol good luck shooting miners. No forgiveness with out bloodshed!
DarkAlpha	Posted - 2004.10.07 20:05:00 - [10] Exelent story I enjoyed it! I'm also at work and your beautifull stories make my day go faster ... oooo look it is already 4pm cool 2 more hours to go! Why did you MWD your self in to him again? hmm strange tactics... you cant ram-damage another ship!!!! just a hint lol good luck shooting miners. No forgiveness with out bloodshed!
markol	Posted - 2004.10.07 20:09:00 - [11] When your optimal range is 2.5km and you start out at 30km, you have to get close fast and start causing dmg immediately, or you are just taking the dmg without inflicting any. My mistake was that I got too close to cause optimal amount of dmg. I rpobably would hav ewon that battle had I stayed in my optimal range and not up his birdlike ass.
markol	Posted - 2004.10.07 20:09:00 - [12] When your optimal range is 2.5km and you start out at 30km, you have to get close fast and start causing dmg immediately, or you are just taking the dmg without inflicting any. My mistake was that I got too close to cause optimal amount of dmg. I rpobably would hav ewon that battle had I stayed in my optimal range and not up his birdlike ass.
Rathos	Posted - 2004.10.08 00:31:00 - [13] Originally by: DarkAlpha Exelent story I enjoyed it! I'm also at work and your beautifull stories make my day go faster ... oooo look it is already 4pm cool 2 more hours to go! Why did you MWD your self in to him again? hmm strange tactics... you cant ram-damage another ship!!!! just a hint lol good luck shooting miners. I too enjoyed your story and would like to offer my condolences on your sad loss of yet another Mega. I feel it necessary to point out however that too manyhelpplzomfgtoomanysmilies
Rathos	Posted - 2004.10.08 00:31:00 - [14] Originally by: DarkAlpha Exelent story I enjoyed it! I'm also at work and your beautifull stories make my day go faster ... oooo look it is already 4pm cool 2 more hours to go! Why did you MWD your self in to him again? hmm strange tactics... you cant ram-damage another ship!!!! just a hint lol good luck shooting miners. I too enjoyed your story and would like to offer my condolences on your sad loss of yet another Mega. I feel it necessary to point out however that too manyhelpplzomfgtoomanysmilies
Elenia Kheynes	Posted - 2004.10.08 00:40:00 - [15] You are a really unlucky guy Dear friendly customer... Can I have your money ?
Elenia Kheynes	Posted - 2004.10.08 00:40:00 - [16] You are a really unlucky guy Dear friendly customer... Can I have your money ?
hellwarrior	Posted - 2004.10.08 02:35:00 - [17] I coudl give advice on mining belt ganking like how to be ebil, but i'm not allowed or something? Got roids?
hellwarrior	Posted - 2004.10.08 02:35:00 - [18] I coudl give advice on mining belt ganking like how to be ebil, but i'm not allowed or something? Got roids?
Jazz Bo	Posted - 2004.10.08 07:58:00 - [19] Originally by: Rathos Originally by: DarkAlpha Exelent story I enjoyed it! I'm also at work and your beautifull stories make my day go faster ... oooo look it is already 4pm cool 2 more hours to go! Why did you MWD your self in to him again? hmm strange tactics... you cant ram-damage another ship!!!! just a hint lol good luck shooting miners. I too enjoyed your story and would like to offer my condolences on your sad loss of yet another Mega. I feel it necessary to point out however that too manyhelpplzomfgtoomanysmilies My eyes! The goggles... they're not helping.... smileys... they burn! Aaaaaargh! Originally by: DB Preacher Celestial Apocalypse - Brave souls fighting the endless smak.
Jazz Bo	Posted - 2004.10.08 07:58:00 - [20] Originally by: Rathos Originally by: DarkAlpha Exelent story I enjoyed it! I'm also at work and your beautifull stories make my day go faster ... oooo look it is already 4pm cool 2 more hours to go! Why did you MWD your self in to him again? hmm strange tactics... you cant ram-damage another ship!!!! just a hint lol good luck shooting miners. I too enjoyed your story and would like to offer my condolences on your sad loss of yet another Mega. I feel it necessary to point out however that too manyhelpplzomfgtoomanysmilies My eyes! The goggles... they're not helping.... smileys... they burn! Aaaaaargh! Originally by: DB Preacher Celestial Apocalypse - Brave souls fighting the endless smak.
MinThreat	Posted - 2004.10.08 07:59:00 - [21] Good read m8..truth be told we were all wasted off our **s, and im surprised we were able to get you, but you did give us a bit of excitement for the day. Cheers and see ya next time. btw the guys name was flying scottsman aka "the mad scottsman" Symposium INC
MinThreat	Posted - 2004.10.08 07:59:00 - [22] Good read m8..truth be told we were all wasted off our **s, and im surprised we were able to get you, but you did give us a bit of excitement for the day. Cheers and see ya next time. btw the guys name was flying scottsman aka "the mad scottsman" Symposium INC
Meehan	Posted - 2004.10.08 09:52:00 - [23] Great attitude, man. However, if you're not set up for short range - don't MWD to the prey. That's shooting yourself through the liver Good luck with Nr 9
Meehan	Posted - 2004.10.08 09:52:00 - [24] Great attitude, man. However, if you're not set up for short range - don't MWD to the prey. That's shooting yourself through the liver Good luck with Nr 9
El Sayal	Posted - 2004.10.08 12:43:00 - [25] theres an orbit option for a reason Death is certain, Life isn't.
El Sayal	Posted - 2004.10.08 12:43:00 - [26] theres an orbit option for a reason Death is certain, Life isn't.
Mobius	Posted - 2004.10.08 13:54:00 - [27] another example of why noobs shouldn't be allowed in bs
Mobius	Posted - 2004.10.08 13:54:00 - [28] another example of why noobs shouldn't be allowed in bs
Iban Cortez	Posted - 2004.10.08 14:30:00 - [29] Well where do i begin..... 1st off, using a sheild booster on a mwd blasterthron is insane. Considering the cap and sheild penalties, i would hit that one the head right now. Try an armour tanking setup, leaving your midslots free to use with more effective mods. i.e cap rechargers, stasis, scrambler, mwd. 2nd Use your orbit feature. Start shooting your blaster as soon as you start heading towards your target, and fit assualt lanchers spewing out defender missiles. This way the missile spamming ships do a significant less ammount of damage. You did right to attack the raven first however, i would have done the same thing in your situation. Do you mind me asking what you had in your low slots? Please don't get me wrong, i'm not slating your or calling you a no0b. I'm trying to help my fellow pirates out. If you wanna talk to me ingame, i'm sure i can help you with load outs etc etc. I want to see us pirates posting threads like OMFG I PWNED A RAVEN AND 2 MEGAS SOLO! Ohh and and to the above "another reason why no0bs shouldn't have battleships" line, Maybe you should STFU. The guy here is posting, admiting he got pwned. Just because he hasn't been playing as long and you and I doesn't mean he doesn't have the right to fly what ship he wants. Theres people out there who fly battleships, that have been playing since day 1, and still don't have a ******* clue how to pvp, setup a ship. Most importantly 3/4 of EVE wouldn't have the balls to attack random people, nevermind post about loosing. Thank you, good day Yumenti > anyone wanna buy a zydrine Kayla Red > heh. just 1? Yumenti > thats all i got from reprocess Yumenti > darn, this sux Yumenti > 134mil for a gellente industrial skill book
Iban Cortez	Posted - 2004.10.08 14:30:00 - [30] Well where do i begin..... 1st off, using a sheild booster on a mwd blasterthron is insane. Considering the cap and sheild penalties, i would hit that one the head right now. Try an armour tanking setup, leaving your midslots free to use with more effective mods. i.e cap rechargers, stasis, scrambler, mwd. 2nd Use your orbit feature. Start shooting your blaster as soon as you start heading towards your target, and fit assualt lanchers spewing out defender missiles. This way the missile spamming ships do a significant less ammount of damage. You did right to attack the raven first however, i would have done the same thing in your situation. Do you mind me asking what you had in your low slots? Please don't get me wrong, i'm not slating your or calling you a no0b. I'm trying to help my fellow pirates out. If you wanna talk to me ingame, i'm sure i can help you with load outs etc etc. I want to see us pirates posting threads like OMFG I PWNED A RAVEN AND 2 MEGAS SOLO! Ohh and and to the above "another reason why no0bs shouldn't have battleships" line, Maybe you should STFU. The guy here is posting, admiting he got pwned. Just because he hasn't been playing as long and you and I doesn't mean he doesn't have the right to fly what ship he wants. Theres people out there who fly battleships, that have been playing since day 1, and still don't have a ******* clue how to pvp, setup a ship. Most importantly 3/4 of EVE wouldn't have the balls to attack random people, nevermind post about loosing. Thank you, good day Yumenti > anyone wanna buy a zydrine Kayla Red > heh. just 1? Yumenti > thats all i got from reprocess Yumenti > darn, this sux Yumenti > 134mil for a gellente industrial skill book

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