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Captain Gumpo
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Posted - 2011.02.03 02:09:00 -
[1]
Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I come to you with the transcription of a chat, initially between my client and a fellow resident of New Eden, which sadly ended abruptly. After this, i myself contacted the person in question regarding the disappointing turn of events and found i was unable to progress further and sadly the situation remains unresolved.
Please feel free to read the conversation to get the gist of what i am talking about.
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Channel ID: -18701982
Channel Name: Private Chat (alone)
Listener: Reicine Ceer
Session started: 2011.02.03 01:23:29
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[ 2011.02.03 01:23:37 ] Reicine Ceer > wanna buy your corpse?
[ 2011.02.03 01:23:55 ] GuRasta > no
[ 2011.02.03 01:24:02 ] Reicine Ceer > are you sure?
[ 2011.02.03 01:24:09 ] Reicine Ceer > its a highly collectible item
[ 2011.02.03 01:24:24 ] Reicine Ceer > i'll sell it to you for half price if you're unsure
[ 2011.02.03 01:25:16 ] Reicine Ceer > only 50 million
[ 2011.02.03 01:25:45 ] GuRasta > man you need to get a life
[ 2011.02.03 01:25:52 ] Reicine Ceer > but your corpse is dead
[ 2011.02.03 01:26:02 ] Reicine Ceer > so surely you're the one that needs the life, right? haha
[ 2011.02.03 01:26:41 ] GuRasta > have you ever left high sec? lol
[ 2011.02.03 01:26:47 ] Reicine Ceer > ok, 60mil
[ 2011.02.03 01:27:08 ] Reicine Ceer > I left hi-sec, got into a fight
[ 2011.02.03 01:27:35 ] Reicine Ceer > basically
[ 2011.02.03 01:27:57 ] Reicine Ceer > my life got flipped-turned upside down
[ 2011.02.03 01:28:16 ] Reicine Ceer > And i'd like you to take a minute - just sit right there
[ 2011.02.03 01:28:43 ] Reicine Ceer > And i'll tell you how i became the prince of a town called Bel-Air
[ 2011.02.03 01:28:53 ] Reicine Ceer > In west Lustrevik i was born and raised
[ 2011.02.03 01:29:02 ] Reicine Ceer > On the playground is where i spent most of my days
[ 2011.02.03 01:29:11 ] Reicine Ceer > chillin out, maxin, relaxin all cool
[ 2011.02.03 01:29:24 ] Reicine Ceer > And all shooting some b-ball outside of the moon('s station)
[ 2011.02.03 01:29:36 ] Reicine Ceer > When a couple of pirates who were up to no good
[ 2011.02.03 01:29:44 ] Reicine Ceer > Started making trouble in my neighbourhood
[ 2011.02.03 01:29:52 ] Reicine Ceer > I got in one lil fight and my CEO got scared
[ 2011.02.03 01:30:18 ] Reicine Ceer > And said "You're moving in with your Agent and indy alt in Bel-Air"
[ 2011.02.03 01:30:27 ] Reicine Ceer > cool story huh? There's more if you want to hear
[ 2011.02.03 01:30:53 ] GuRasta > wtf man
[ 2011.02.03 01:31:27 ] Reicine Ceer > Whats it to be? You wanna hear more of the story or should we discuss how much you'll be buying your corpse for?
[ 2011.02.03 01:33:05 ] GuRasta > i can obviously just have a corp mate kill an empty clone and get my corpse, im not giving you ****
[ 2011.02.03 01:33:26 ] Reicine Ceer > but this one is special
[ 2011.02.03 01:33:39 ] Reicine Ceer > not only is it your corpse, but its also full of special stuff
[ 2011.02.03 01:33:48 ] GuRasta > but your nerdiness is milding amusing
[ 2011.02.03 01:33:52 ] Reicine Ceer > kinda similar to moon goo that you use to make t2 components
[ 2011.02.03 01:33:59 ] Reicine Ceer > except its from a man
[ 2011.02.03 01:34:01 ] Reicine Ceer > man-goo
[ 2011.02.03 01:35:19 ] Reicine Ceer > So basically - i dont want to get too technical - i can sell you back your corpse for the low-low price of 65million and it will be filled with man-goo
[ 2011.02.03 01:35:27 ] Reicine Ceer > worth a damn fortune, man!
[ 2011.02.03 01:35:35 ] Reicine Ceer > This is an offer you'd be crazy to pass up
[ 2011.02.03 01:36:24 ] GuRasta > see a therapist man
[ 2011.02.03 01:37:32 ] Reicine Ceer > Look, my therapist said that i need to sell as many corpses as possible - sort of an aversion therapy thing
-continued..
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Captain Gumpo
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Posted - 2011.02.03 02:16:00 -
[2]
:: Continued -
[ 2011.02.03 01:37:35 ] Reicine Ceer > see, i have too many
[ 2011.02.03 01:37:36 ] Reicine Ceer > http://files.therodents.net/2010.12.24.16.14.55.jpg
[ 2011.02.03 01:37:42 ] Reicine Ceer > see image for details
[ 2011.02.03 01:37:53 ] Reicine Ceer > but i compulsively collect them
[ 2011.02.03 01:38:05 ] Reicine Ceer > and when i saw yours in Rens, i knew.. i just knew i had to sell it back to your ASAP
[ 2011.02.03 01:38:22 ] Reicine Ceer > So, if you wanna buy it for only 68mil, you'll be doing me AND my therapist a favour
[ 2011.02.03 01:38:24 ] Reicine Ceer > :D
[ 2011.02.03 01:41:05 ] Reicine Ceer > So how's about it?
[ 2011.02.03 01:42:06 ] Reicine Ceer > Hello?
[ 2011.02.03 01:42:09 ] GuRasta > get a life man, you can do it
[ 2011.02.03 01:42:22 ] GuRasta > bye bye now, it was amusing
[ 2011.02.03 01:42:25 ] Reicine Ceer > Im trying to, by making money selling corpses back to people
[ 2011.02.03 01:42:28 ] Reicine Ceer > NO! DONT GO!
[ 2011.02.03 01:43:22 ] Reicine Ceer > I think we have something special here
[ 2011.02.03 01:43:28 ] Reicine Ceer > I have all those corpses to sell
[ 2011.02.03 01:44:01 ] Reicine Ceer > what if i just sold you one of them - yours, for the low low price of 90mil - and that could be our relationship concluded
[ 2011.02.03 01:44:06 ] Reicine Ceer > Sort of a business-pleasure thing
[ 2011.02.03 01:45:14 ] Reicine Ceer > If you like, we could discuss this via teamspeak?
[ 2011.02.03 01:48:07 ] GuRasta > i dont talk to children on teamspeak, or nerdy fat men sitting in a dark room drinking soda, i advise you to put this effort into something normal and beneficial in life, bye now :)
[ 2011.02.03 01:48:20 ] Reicine Ceer > What?
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At which point the person my client was talking to simply stopped talking, and left the conversation. Disappointed with this turn of events, and deeply concerned by the damage this may have wrought on her mental state, i decided to contact this 'Gurasta' for myself, and hopefully explain the situation and come to an amenable closure of the entire affair. Our conversation follows in the next post.
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Captain Gumpo
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Posted - 2011.02.03 02:21:00 -
[3]
[01:49:48] Captain Gumpo > Good evening
[01:50:06] GuRasta > second account?
[01:50:07] Captain Gumpo > I have been given word that you have been discussing corpse-wholesale with a patient of mine
[01:50:19] GuRasta > loll
[01:50:46] Captain Gumpo > My patient is undergoing a radical, groundbreaking treatment and im sorely disappointed with your lack of understanding regarding her condition
[01:51:12] Captain Gumpo > You see, Ms Ceer has a specific fear of corpses - so i gave her several hundred to attempt to sell, in an effort to rid her of this affliction
[01:51:29] Captain Gumpo > Personally, i find it sickening that you threw this in her face, laughing it off as some big joke
[01:51:33] Captain Gumpo > I assure you, this is no joke
[01:52:16] Captain Gumpo > If you would like, i will happily pass along any message you may have for her
[01:52:22] Captain Gumpo > An apology, perhaps
[01:53:45] Captain Gumpo > Listen man, we're on the verge of a breakthrough
[01:54:21] Captain Gumpo > Its just sad that after coming so close, she's had all this progress taken away from her by one small-minded individual - you - that refuses to see the <i>big picture</i>
[01:58:37] Captain Gumpo > Nothing to say, boyo?
[02:05:44] GuRasta > lol man this is a GAME
[02:06:05] GuRasta > its fun? enjoyable? recreational activity?
[02:06:12] Captain Gumpo > What the <i>hell</i> are you talking about man?! This is a person's mental stability you are joking and laughing about
[02:06:17] GuRasta > i gtg tho real life calls
[02:06:24] GuRasta > peace man gl with the corpse selling
[02:06:26] Captain Gumpo > I am <b>disgusted</b> with your attitude
[02:06:43] Captain Gumpo > Im not trying to sell the corpses, remember
[02:06:53] Captain Gumpo > Im trying to get my client through a difficult period in her life
[02:06:59] Captain Gumpo > And you're messing it all up
[02:07:00] GuRasta > gl with that
[02:07:03] GuRasta > btw btw
[02:07:11] GuRasta > byebye*
[02:07:16] Captain Gumpo > Look, its only 100million, just buy the corpse from her and you'll never hear from us again
--
At which point he dropped the conversation yet again! To be honest, i've never seen such a disgusting lack of compassion for someone so clearly troubled by anyone. Ever. Never in my long career as therapist has this situation cropped up - i cannot fathom the depth of Gurasta's hollow, disappointing contempt for his fellow pod pilot.
:: END OF TEXT ::
<<TAGGED SIGNATURE FOLLOWS>>
Captain Gumpo - therapist extraordinaire! Radical, groundbreaking techniques involving corpse wholesale, experimental hamster insertion coupled with electro-shock treatment and helium balloons are his calling cards.
If you have a mental issue within New Eden that you need resolved - and if you can find him - you need to call Captain Gumpo.
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IQ 001
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Posted - 2011.02.03 02:35:00 -
[4]
Bravo!
Bravo!
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Xyfu
Minmatar
Applied Mechanics
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Posted - 2011.02.03 04:42:00 -
[5]
Character Alt and dis-Organised trolling Dicussion is that-a-way.
_____
^
That is a sig line. It should be there without me having to put one in. |
Titos Polo
0utbreak
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Posted - 2011.02.03 05:17:00 -
[6]
Edited by: Titos Polo on 03/02/2011 05:17:17
i will buy mine if your patient has it...
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St Mio
Amarr
Imperial Academy
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Posted - 2011.02.03 05:19:00 -
[7]
*applauds*
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Mister Cletus
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Posted - 2011.02.03 05:21:00 -
[8]
I am personally sympathetic to your client's needs. The nonchalance toward mental health needs is appalling!
Keep up the good work and good luck with the treatment of your client. It's good to see a therapist thinking outside the box and conducting non-traditional treatment options.
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Patient 2428190
DEGRREE'Fo'FREE Internet Business School
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Posted - 2011.02.03 05:23:00 -
[9]
I am a patient
WTF is this...
...Then when you stopped to think about it. All you really said was Lalala. |
Mister Cletus
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Posted - 2011.02.03 05:33:00 -
[10]
 Originally by: Patient 2428190
I am a patient
WTF is this...
You know what? Captain Gumpo seems like a very progressive therapist. Although I have not had the pleasure of receiving his therapy, I would be willing to bet that he could help you understand.
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FunzzeR
Death of Virtue
MeatSausage EXPRESS
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Posted - 2011.02.03 05:44:00 -
[11]
In before the lock. 
PRAISE THE SCOTTISH FOLD!!
THEIR WILL SHALL BE DONE!! |
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CCP Spitfire
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Posted - 2011.02.03 08:02:00 -
[12]
Moved from 'EVE General Discussion'.
Spitfire
Community Representative
CCP Hf, EVE Online |
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Captain Gumpo
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Posted - 2011.02.03 13:48:00 -
[13]
Well, moving the thread based on it being started on an incorrect subforum makes sense, i understand that.
But to remove the chatlogs that were integral to what i was talking about seems a tad... well, stupid.
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Karl Planck
Walt Disney Productions
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Posted - 2011.02.03 14:04:00 -
[14]
you CAN post chat logs, but you cant include the names
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Don't debate with morons. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience. |
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CCP Spitfire
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Posted - 2011.02.03 14:17:00 -
[15]
... and locked.
Spitfire
Community Representative
CCP Hf, EVE Online |
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