Houm, this miniskirt is not too short when I bend over, is it?

*Indahmawar bends down to grab something from the floor, and several customers behidn her spit ut their drinks, sigh, whistle and applaud... not all of them male*

Huh-uh...

Sigh, Where are the real Men...

Crap, I'm in no man's land again.

How does one Be good?

I'd say both

I'd like a Random for me and Alice, please

Is that some kind of latin american drink?

Wet soggy plague infested tissues?

I'm from West Wales. We're the upper class Welsh!

still waiting for my Random...

I'd like a Random please.

*pays 9,000 ISK*

no homo

I meant a random drink, not a random mcnally.
GTFO my space or i'll pod ya.

*returns from jungle*

I claim this notepad in the name of Queen Victoria and the British Empire*

*flees into jungle yelling "Tee hee no tab for me"*

*Indahmawar thanks Random for her new pad, but hesitates to ask why did his parents name him after a drink*

Terima kasih, Random. Can I...? Huh... nevermind.

*Miz wonders why Graygor enters the ladies room.*

Sorry my friend. I don't know where Dr Livingstone is. And I doubt you will find him here.

*Indahmawar notices something strange moving by the jukebox, then...*

...music starts playing.

*staggers back from the jungle and removes his bloody safari coat*

My god... when on earth did the jungle get filled with these things?

*Reaches behind the bar for some firepower.*

Right you little blue buggers, time to get jumangi on your arse.

*applies ample mustache wax*

Tally ho!

Totally unrelated.

But locusts taste pretty damn good if you bread them then cook them up in peanut oil and serve them with garlic mayo.

Seriously, it tastes like a cross between chicken and pork. Its lush.

I demand locust be added to the menus.

I felt the same til i tried it. They taste like chicken and pork. I could eat these all day and theyre healthy too.... except when you bread and deep fry them and eat with garlic mayo.

They taste like those chicken strips from kfc kinda.

Well i dont know how else to describe them!

*peeks into the mens room*

Er clean up stall 2.

*Does a random dance to put my name in the hat*

*pulls up a stool*

Housework be done! Work be done! Now is time for rum!

And yes Random, we are now sponsored by Quafe. Go get yer shirt!

I have it on good authority that Alice will take a nice cup of Tetley, milk and 2 sugars.

Oh that reminds me Random.

A guy i work with is from Oklahoma. I told him your route of "go south and turn right at Oklahoma" he thought about it for a moment and replied. "Yep.. sounds right"

Good old Amarillo, my birthplace. It's the world's largest truck stop, more or less, surrounded by 100s of miles of nothing. "Drive farther and see less" is the slogan around there. My cousin and I once accidentally burnt about a square mile of Amarillo grassland by lighting blowing tumbleweeds on fire.

*Looks at Random and the LAGL man*

One Quafe please.

To infiltrate the Smurfs and destroy their Republic from the inside.

For some reason the like button has bugged. It done that for anyone else?

And you're right Random. I say 1000isk per post should cover it.

There's some tough brown grass around there, along with the yuccas and the prickly pear cactuses. Enough grass to handle a lot of beef ranching. There's a huge feed lot and slaughterhouse outside of town, and when the wind blows from the south in the spring, you get to smell cow manure all day.

Being from a big beef rearing part of the UK i know that feeling.

Though turkey smells FAR worse if you ask me.

I have been served.

*Indah is browsing TV channels. Suddenly, an advertisement shocks her*

Huh... what is this supposed to mean?

Where are all those decrepit elders when I need them to rescue me from my youthful incomprehension?

You ever seen Paul, Random?

Watching that vid made me open it up to the bit where Simon Pegg and Nick Frost reenact the scene and then cry "Ahhh people"

You will enjoy it im sure.

If you liked Shaun of the Dead you will love it.

I think we should have a quafe shirt party.

But, you're a dirty mind! Maybe I was talking abouy not wearing a shirt, but, a tank top... or a blouse... or a bra...

How Irish is your coffee Alice? Only a teeny bit Irish? Or or full on "we just got the ferry back from the UK" and we're drunk as all hell Irish?

Ahh, the only Irish Coffee I like.

Sounds like an interesting story.

*enters the bar and hears the commotion over the speakers* Im sorry, am I intuding on something?

Tis bonus day tomorrow.

I want an advance order for a Large Group of Exotic Dancers, spiced rum and a lot of boosters please.

You mean mashed banana? When I was a child, I loved to eat mashed banana with crushed cookies and orange juice, all mashed together in a kind of pur+¬e. Is a nice way to use bananas when they are becoming black and soft, whatever it's called that process.

Yiole. She was the first wrestler picked by Random.

Kudos for the drink. I will seriously count on you whenever I need to get rid of some Nutella on my skin.

*Yiole takes some Nutella with her finger and then licks some of it*

Oh, do you see? There's some Nutella on my finger... would you oblige?

I be going to celebrate my last night in uniform tonight.

Tomorrow morning I shall awaken terribly hungover as a civilian.

So a pint of rum please with an umbrella in it.

At the private room upstairs, Yiole is temporally alone as Random went to some foraging at the bar. She's taking a nap on the sofa facing the door, leaning on her side with a knee forward and her hands under the neck and her cheek. She breathes softly and relaxed as her face displays a satisfied smile which is one of the reasons why men still bother themselves to chase women and follow them along the paths of their nature, even in such distant future, and even if they're mighty, immortal capsuleers. Yet another reason is how the sofa is conveniently facing the door, so Random will be greated by Yiole's silhouette, the steep angle of her waist, the full curve of her hip, and the evidence that she still didn't bothered to dress up.

Asleep, Yiole slightly changes her pose and moans softly, while a part of her brain gets ready to wake up and open her eyes at the sound of the door opening, to see Random's face as a subconcious mean to pick one of several courses of action...

I wish mine could look like this, with a functioning door...

*walks out of the bar with the feeling of not being noticed.*

You can't have my cake anyway, its all MINE

yeah, mom always said don't make "dat ass" face, or it'll get stuck like that

Hey I can take my pants off too...... and shirt

All you need is a good pair of boots.

*cough*

WHAT are you looking to, Mr. McNally?

*cough*

14 minutes? Is he Random Fast McNally?

*Yiole rushes upstairs, shaking her head*

Oh... so that was just the warm up...

I await for this.

Oh Oh get me to 50k likes and I'll go all the way xD

*Starts downloading Photoshop*

This may have got out of hand

*awaits for the transmission*

*proceeds blocking transmission with pillows*

edit:

TRIPLE NINJA!!!!

I really really want Body tattoo's in Eve... It's like my #1 wish

(since Laudes story goes in a similar direction like mine 2 days and ~30 pages ago I decided to pick it up
with a new "episode" here...
(and before I start to forget ^.^))

Darker Days Are Yet To Come (humping shameless on current SciFi trends ^_^)

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

---PODSYSTEMS RESTARTING---WARNING|CRITICAL ERROR DETECTED---

---ACTIVATING SECONDARY EMERGENCY SYSTEMS_ _ _ _FAILURE---

---EMERGENCY EJECT INITIATED---

Still half fainted, Zoe only briefly notices the words on her UI before her pod opens and lets out all of the including juices in a rush. With the pod completely shut off and dead, Zoe falls down uncontrolled. Still wired to the pod systems, the plugs get ripped out of her very painfully in the process. Her knees and elbows make an uncomfortable contact with the floors iron grid.
Suffering under the stressful experience, the last thing she sees with blurry eyes are some persons running towards her and a familiar voice shouting:

GÇ£Commander? Can you hear me? GǪSheGÇÖs fainting! Quick! Get her out of here!GÇ¥

(meta snippet)

Out of Pod Experience: where 95% of the subscribers are male, 50% of the characters are female en 95% of the female characters are lesbian.

(/meta snippet)

(meta: we could use more males, actually, and more willing to hit some of the females here. It was a lucky coincidence that i thought that Yiole & Random could do a good couple and that he agrees to play that game. What's funnier is that somehow i figured that exotic dancers and waitresses would come to play sooner than later because of lack of females...)

(meta: indeed, some of it have gone quite out of control. I must admit that it has become too much for my taste. Miz is and will stay straight, but so far, none of the men has given it a shot)

*Splurts his tea out, monacle falling into the cup*

(/meta) Welp, I'd noticed it was tending towards that way somehow, I've been playing it as it comes, and in the case of Alice and 8 that just kind of happened. Am I overdoing it?

*staggers in the bar wearing hospital gown. Walks over to Kirjava's table and takes the tea cup from his hand, drinks it, and sets down the empty.*

Now, what the hell is that supposed to mean?

This Style is catching on ;)

Isthatawiginyourhands, Mr. McNally?.

Maybe I should go back to it, It looks good on me.

*wants to give Kate a positive answer about her well behaviour, but then remembers that mummy told not to talk while eating*

"I don't think any of my girls are watching."

*Gives Random a quick kiss on the cheek*

*pops up head*

"Harvesting process interrupted to prevent extractor overload."

*warps to rest station for unload, then warps back to 0 and proceeds process*

"If someone tries to mine your asteroids, first talk to them; if that fails, bump them; if that fails, gank them. The essence of life is a drilling game, so drill soon, drill often and drill long"

- Did you *pant* said something? *pant*
- Shhhh, shut up and keep drilling...

*9 joins in with a solid one, and stares 5 in the eye as if to say 'move over, child.'

*Pulls Random back into the room*

I thought you said "intensely"

*shakes her head slightly as she rolls her eyes, and grabs the coffee*

anything interesting going on out there?


Meanwhile in the main room.....

welcome to the land of torn between two women

PS: keep an updated clone

You alone, Mr. McNally? Do I look like a one-man gurl? -_-

Not trespasing into Yiole's grounds unless she explicitly invites.

IMO, that adresses how the capsuleer is revived, not how he becomes a capsuleer. The written lore on becoming a capsuleer is what I quoted from the Jovian wet grave, on how people get implants to plug to the capsule.

The new video just tries to unify capsuleers and dusties for marketing reasons, and goes as far as depicting the pod as a glorified HUD rather than what the lore says about it. I don't know wether i got everything wrong, CCP intends to change the lore or just the video was made by the same guys who put lasers on a Raven, but as far as my characters are concerned, they all live in their original bodies, except Ish.

BTW, I foresee a potential big battle with many hands once Laudenum brings the news... as someone said, "a blockade is a target rich environment" to capsuleers.

Yes, Random. *purrs*

*Slowly lick-kisses Random's bald, ear to ear*

Ok, since this is TGFB im going to ask a drinks question.

Why the hell do people in the USA drink root beer? UK root beer is vastly superior. This stuff tastes like chemicals!

I went to an import store today during my break and bought a bunch of sodas including 3 kinds of root beer as dandelion and burdock is one of my favourite drinks for summer.

But this stuff.... is just... oh god its so awful. 2 sips and i poured it away. Same with the Barqs root beer, equally as vile.

This can be the rule no matter what the wrestling edible medium is!

Does someone know what happened to the 20 tons of discount Nutella I sent to the Bar, some months ago?

As an Amarr it's not usual for me to go and demean myself with degrading, physical exercise. May I be allowed to have my second, Brutella Shunkrat, wrestle for me?

This is Brutella.....

(brings forward a 6'4" 335 lb hambeast dressed in G-string and bending a Titanium bar)

*Comes into the Bar Jogging*

(Rocky Theme in the Background)

She is Wearing a hoodie and sweat pants

*Does a lap round the bar, and fake fights with Air*

Feel the Burn!!!!

BURN!!!!

*Yawns*

Oh well that's enough

*Sits down and orders a Coffee*

*Ish gets into the bar, steps on the bar (doh! she's wearing trousers!- and announces:*

My innocent hand has rolled a Chribba dice to determine who is gonna fight who.

With the wrestlers being:

1- Yiole Gionglao (f)
2- Indahmawar Fazmarai (f)
3- Random McNally (m)
4- Kirjava (m)
5- Chloe Kaltana (f)
6- Gaelia Bonaventure (f)
7- Alice Saki (f)
8- Laudenum Hayes (f)

The dice has said:

1. 3
2. 8
3. 2
4. 4
5. 6
6. 7
7. 5
8. 1

So the matches are:

1+2= Laudenum Hayes vs Random McNally
3+4= Yiole Gionglao vs Kirjava
5+6= Alice Saki vs Chloe Kaltana
7+8= Gaelia Bonaventure vs Indahmawar Fazmarai

The 4 winners of each match will make it into semi-Final, from which will come two candidates to the Final combat.

The wrestlers of the Final 4 will be contacted briefly via EVEmail.


PS: wrestlers have been contacted and know their fate; waiting for answers on who wants to write each segment.

Have to say the same, nicely done :)

@Random: NSFW? Not safe for wieners? ...Oh wait! Not safe for work, haha

...well, I'm ok with this ;)

Next contest get in the ring you guys!

I've been waiting all day for you to come online :P

@Random:
That was brilliant and fun to read!!!

@Ish:
Round 1...Fight!...Perfect!

*HUGS* \/

Ish, What happened to the Nutella Competition?

*wakes up in a drunken stupor* whoa how long have I been here?

As he laid in bed he noticed the steal slotted air vent over his mirror...

(meta: That is ok with me, and for the record the Sorp is comonner fit with some "special" modifactions. However I feel it is nothing outside of eve reality. I am assuming extra EM shield hardening is acceptable and accurate, same with it having a cyno generator. If is not let me know)

(Thats understandable man, also on a side note I began writing the first part of my story last night, if anybody has any suggestion on a good medium to post it to please let me know, currently its sitting in Microsoft Word on my desktop, i plan on working more on it tonight, also I wouldnt mind getting suggestions as I know almost nohing lore wise of New Eden, while it allows me to be freely creative, I want to attempt to stick to some type of accuracy within the EVE Universe feel free to message me if you can offer any advise or suggestions thanks again o7)