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Sanai Nobuseri
Evil .inc
7
   |
Posted - 2013.05.18 18:54:00 -
[1] - Quote
 LOOOOOOOOL
I rolled out of bed this morning vaguely aware that the shelter I live in let us sleep in on a Saturday, I stood in line, Ate my breakfast took a shower and navigated through a dangerous neighborhood of cracked out homeless people, swindlers and other various unsavory characters to a nicer neighborhood in order too sit down and have some tea at a Starbucks as I usually begin my day browsing the employment adds for local restaurants in order to find myself a summer job. Well lo and behold I log into eve to have a look around and the first thing I see is this glorious message sent to me by a member of Test. I was thinking to myself what pray tell would someone from Test alliance want from me? I checked the person who sent it, was not from one of my brothers alts so figured I would just delete it and go about my day like I usually do. Well for whatever reason I got curious and decided that curiosity must be indulged. So I opened the message and lo and behold I got to read these words.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Warning
From: kermity
Sent: 2013.05.18 04:01
To: Sanaii Nobuseri,
Hello, my name is Kermity and I am contacting you as the leader of Dreddit's Mercenarial Activities Division. Recently I have been hired to succesfully do one of two things to you and your corp.
A) Collect 200m from you directly.
B) Collect 250m in killmails from your corp.
I would like to stress that this is just business and not a personal attack. Any attempt at denying this will result in a battle between members of a 4000 man corp and yours.
My employer wishes to remain anonymous throughout this transaction until it has seen completion.
Thank you for your time,
Kermity
Mercenarial Activities Division
Dreddit, TEST Alliance.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Now, as I read this message I could not help but just break out into laughter, I went from spending a miserable unemployed night in a Homeless shelter surrounded by drug addled over aggressive vagrants that dont understand personal property and having a pretty ****** morning to having an incredibly wonderful laugh. I mean it made me smile and turned my crappy morning into a beautiful ray of sunshine.
First: Test bros, Srsly? you really really need to have a meeting with your members to learn new scams cause this Is just sloppy and just reeks of desperation.
Second: I would happily be at war with Test and any other major Alliance right now cause it gives me thousands of new targets so I dont even need to leave highsec to fight you.
Third: WTF???!!!! did you even bother to look? we do highsec war decs why the hell would we even remotely care should you dec us? Hell I would dec every major alliance in eve save the damned dec fee is f'ing expensive.
Fourth: Were you to declare war on us and I really really really really really really really really really really really really wish you would but i doubt it will happen, every single highsec pvp Merc and grief-er corp in eve would want to jump on the wardec to save the 500mil it takes to shoot at your pilots and the paltry 250 mil isk in kills you want to extract from us would probably result in several billion in losses on your side? I would literally have to screen applicants to get in on this wardec it would be so crazy.
Fifth: At the last moment I could just make it mutual and enjoy a perma war with test never allowing you to break the dec without an absurdly high surrender fee and just allow people to come and go as they like in order to take shots at you all whenever they please >_<
I still cannot stop laughing at the pure ludicrousness of this letter, it is freaking hilarious, I mean at first I almost felt flattered that someone I wardecced might have bitched enough and had connections to make something like that happened, but after about 30 seconds of getting my morning caffeine into my system I realized it was just freaking funny as hell LOL.
I cant decide weather this was a very stupid scam attempt, or even remotely serious and extremely hilarious threat >_<
 Also thank you so so so much for making a miserable morning not quite so miserable >_<
Anyways anyone feel like a free war dec?
On a side note, ccp really does need to let us add picks and have sigs and what not on the forums here. Also colored text and other tools to make blocks of test less fing annoying would be nice. |
Reppyk
Yarrbear Inc.
BricK sQuAD.
416
|
Posted - 2013.05.18 19:20:00 -
[2] - Quote
One more smiley and I'll hit you with a bat. In the game of course.
I AM SPACE CAPTAIN REPPYK.
-áI AM A LOWSEC GANKER, HIGHSEC SCUM, NULLSEC BASTARD, WORMHOLE INVADER.
Welcome to, welcome to, welcome to my scramble. GÖÑ |
Murk Paradox
Red Tsunami
Moon Warriors
344
|
Posted - 2013.05.18 19:37:00 -
[3] - Quote
Sanai Nobuseri wrote:LOOOO....
C-C-C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
On a side note, that is a random generated and spammed eve mail sent to a lot of people to fish free iskies.
Good luck on your search (newspaper ads).
"I say tomato, you say tomaCCP BAN ALL TOMATOES THEY ARE HARASSING ME I WANT TOMATO FREE HIGHSEC."-á
-TheGunslinger42
Proud enforcer of the Code, see [url]http://www.minerbumping.com[/url]-á for details. |
Cannibal Kane
Somali Coast Guard Authority
1761
|
Posted - 2013.05.18 22:42:00 -
[4] - Quote
I get them to..
I normally just respond with "Blow it out your hole" and then continue about my business.
"I saw him fight by the monument in Jita. -áHe flowed in his Machariel like a Shinto spirit, 800MM shells sprouting in his passing. -áHis hair flowed in the corona of his target's warp core breach. -áIt was truly majestic. -áAnd while everyone stared in awe I stole the loot and ran off.-áBecause I am like that." --áNEONOVUS |
Tetsuo Tsukaya
Pixel Navigators
40
|
Posted - 2013.05.18 23:03:00 -
[5] - Quote
Oh ****, does the mutual war/endless war thing still exist? We could have take. Advantage of that a few weeks ago but I thought it had been patched |
Xayder
NED-Clan
Goonswarm Federation
255
|
Posted - 2013.05.18 23:45:00 -
[6] - Quote
NEED MOAR RAGE RIGHT THERE
I don't always post, But when i post I do it with my main |
Xayder
NED-Clan
Goonswarm Federation
255
|
Posted - 2013.05.18 23:46:00 -
[7] - Quote
LOOOOOOOOOOL
I don't always post, But when i post I do it with my main |
Tora Bushido
EVE Corporation 987654321-POP
The Marmite Collective
339
|
Posted - 2013.05.19 01:01:00 -
[8] - Quote
I never get these nice mails........ I WANT A FREE WAR TOO ! Would save me 500M/week
You either love us or we hate you. |
kermity
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
0
|
Posted - 2013.06.04 18:42:00 -
[9] - Quote
#NoRegrets
10B and counting.
YOLOYOLOYOLO
#DELVE2012 |
Giantmoth
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
0
|
Posted - 2013.06.04 18:47:00 -
[10] - Quote
Can we consider this as an advanced form of tears? |
kermity
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
0
|
Posted - 2013.06.04 21:36:00 -
[11] - Quote
Giantmoth wrote:Can we consider this as an advanced form of tears?
If you want, this can be Johnson and Johnson brand soap. |
beancounter Jaynara
Wildly Inappropriate
Goonswarm Federation
4
|
Posted - 2013.06.05 13:40:00 -
[12] - Quote
Perhaps it's not a scam. Maybe he really was hired. Can you think of anyone you may have angered? Did you shoot at someone? Or perhaps you mined someone's asteroid?
Or perhaps the evemail was intended for someone else?
Did you try contacting the person who sent this to try and understand? |
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