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Desired Username	Posted - 2005.11.17 17:23:00 - [31] What's got 2 legs and bleeds alot? Half a dog
ArmedSolid	Posted - 2005.11.17 19:26:00 - [32] scientists have discovered that beer contains female hormones !! they gave three men twelve pints and after a short while they gained weight /talked rubbish /and couldnt drive , boom boom feel free to hit me back with male jokes anyone who is offended
Elita	Posted - 2005.11.17 20:40:00 - [33] Not the oldest joke, but... A doctor, an accountant, and a lawyer are arguing about which of their professions is the oldest. "God created Eve by removing one of Adam's ribs," the doctor says. "That was a surgical operation; therefore medicine is the oldest profession." "But God created the order out of chaos," says the accountant. "That's an accountant's job." "Ah," says the lawyer, "but who created the chaos?" -- "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." -Arthur C. Clarke
Andicuri Vas	Posted - 2005.11.17 21:13:00 - [34] Did you hear about the fly that landed on a toilet seat? He got ****ed off. A V
Kilosher Silgen	Posted - 2005.11.17 21:26:00 - [35] I went into the bank today. I said, 'Could you check my balance?' - They pushed me over! My back's killing me. I've strained it. I was playing piggy-back, with my little boy, and I fell off. I went to the doctor the other day, I said I've broke my leg in three places. He said, 'Don't go to those places.' Throughout our marriage, my wife has always stood by my side. She had to. We've only got one chair. I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
Confussled Bugger	Posted - 2005.11.18 02:12:00 - [36] What do you call a mushroom who buys drinks? A fungi to be with. ... ..... bangs head on desk --------------
Dario Wall	Posted - 2005.11.18 07:58:00 - [37] A blonde is driving home one evening, when she spots another blonde sitting in a rowboat in an empty field. The blonde then pulls to the side of the road and yells to the other blonde, "You're the type of blonde who gives us a bad name!" The blonde in the rowboat then shouts back, "Why don't you come do something about it!" The first blonde then replies, "I would if I knew how to swim!" Pathetic, I know... -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- CEO, MegaCorp Enterprises
Scots Crusader	Posted - 2005.11.18 10:29:00 - [38] I see scientist have discovered a foodstuff that cuts a womans sex drive by 95%.......................it's called wedding cake!!!!!!!!!
Elita	Posted - 2005.11.18 20:10:00 - [39] A woman in a bar starts choking on the olive from her martini. She's desperately trying to get air, but the olive is really stuck, cutting off her air supply. A guy races over, pulls down her pants, and start licking her butt. She is so shocked, she coughs explosively, sending the olive flying across the room. Breathing heavily, she turns to her rescuer. "WTF?" she pants, "Wow, thanks, but WTF was that?" He replies: "The hind-lick maneuver." -- "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." -Arthur C. Clarke
Selandius	Posted - 2005.11.19 03:40:00 - [40] Edited by: Selandius on 19/11/2005 03:40:35 sry if anyone already said this but.... "A man walked into a bar" . . . . . . . . . yes thats it EH! (used to be Zyyrus, BUT THE BODY SNATCHER GOT ME)
Ecnav	Posted - 2005.11.19 03:54:00 - [41] oldest, worst joke ever.... person 1: knock knock person 2: who's there p1: bannana p2: bannana who? p1:knock knock p2:who's there? p1:bannana p2: bannana who? p1:knock knock person 2: who's there p1: bannana p2: bannana who? p1:knock knock p2: WHO THE **** IS THERE!!!! p1:orange p2:orange....who? (at this point p2's head is about to explode) p1: orange you glad i didnt say bannana
JImmy Jester	Posted - 2005.11.19 13:06:00 - [42] Edited by: JImmy Jester on 19/11/2005 13:06:48 Why didnt the hippy life guard save the drowning man? He was too far out, man!
Azure Skyclad	Posted - 2005.11.19 13:53:00 - [43] How do you stop your girlfriend giving you a blow-job? Marry her. (spotted this one on a pub toilet wall.) "Don't bother looking here for a laugh mate. The joke is in your hand." http://www.voodoorockers.co.uk/
Brazero	Posted - 2005.11.19 17:35:00 - [44] Edited by: Brazero on 19/11/2005 17:36:04 There was a young blonde named Jill Who tried a dynamite stick for thrill They found her vagina in South Carolina And one of her t.i.t.s in Brazil
ArmedSolid	Posted - 2005.11.20 10:48:00 - [45] Anyone remember the giants catchphrase in Jack an the beanstalk ?? it starts FE FI FO FUM grab a bit of paper and write it down ,then write it out again in differant order like FI FE FUM FO FO FUM FE FI FUM FI FO FE FE FO FUM FI ok now read it back out loud and what do you get ?? chris eubanks telephone number.
High Sierra	Posted - 2005.11.20 14:41:00 - [46] Whats the difference between light and hard? you can go to sleep with a light on.
corporal hicks	Posted - 2005.11.20 23:54:00 - [47] Edited by: corporal hicks on 20/11/2005 23:55:00 You hear about the magic tractor? Drove down a lane and turned into a field! what do they do with the bikes after the tour de france? Recycle them! How many members of U2 to change a lightbulb? 1 Bono he stands there bulb in hand and the world revolves around him! How many feminists to change a lightbulb? None they just start a support group called "coping with Darkness" How many flies to screw in a lightbulb? 2! problem is getting them in there! " Stay Frosty "
Primus Gelt	Posted - 2005.11.21 11:21:00 - [48] What do you call a couple Blondes in a freezer? Frosted flakes. What's the meanest thing **** Cheney ever did to Dubya in the oval office? Told him to go stand in the corner. What do the letters in Fiat stand for? Fix it again, Tony What do the letters in Ford stand for? Found on road dead Did you know that on a quiet night you can hear a Ford rust? What did the leper say to the prostitute? You keep the tip Where are you most likely to be if European? Near a toilet!!!
Zuki Ed	Posted - 2005.11.21 13:07:00 - [49] How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree. Wave at her.
Madscotsman	Posted - 2005.11.21 13:28:00 - [50] A corpmate of mine thinks this is funny.......Geology rocks! What do you call a man with a seagull on his head....Cliff What do you call a man with leaves on his head.......Russell What do you call a man with a car on his head......Jack I'll stop there I think.
Scots Crusader	Posted - 2005.11.21 13:29:00 - [51] What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells??????? Pregnant!!!!!!! ----------------------------------------------- Maturity and wisdom do not occur overnight. Stupidity on the otherhand, can happen in the blink of an eye!!!!
Penny Parker	Posted - 2005.11.21 13:58:00 - [52] Why did the blonde put an empty milk bottle back in the fridge?? In case anyone wanted a black coffee!!
Scots Crusader	Posted - 2005.11.21 15:04:00 - [53] Why do women get married in white? All household appliances come in that colour. ----------------------------------------------- Maturity and wisdom do not occur overnight. Stupidity on the otherhand, can happen in the blink of an eye!!!!
Rodj Blake	Posted - 2005.11.21 16:16:00 - [54] Originally by: Madscotsman A corpmate of mine thinks this is funny.......Geology rocks! What do you call a man with a seagull on his head....Cliff What do you call a man with leaves on his head.......Russell What do you call a man with a car on his head......Jack I'll stop there I think. What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug What do you call a woman with three pints of beer on her head? Beartrix What do you call a woman playing snooker with three pints of bear on her head? Beartrix Potter. Dolce et decorum est pro imperator mori
Scots Crusader	Posted - 2005.12.08 13:43:00 - [55] A blonde girl phones up her boyfriend and cries "You have got to come round at once,I am stuck on a killer jigsaw!!!" So the man drives round to her house and goes in. the blonde says, "it is supposed to be a tiger according to the picture on the front of the box, but i have been at it 3 days now." The man takes the girl aside and says, "Firstly, why don't you calm down and have a cup of tea, and secondly, i will tidy it all away as you will never get it to look anything like a tiger in a month of Sundays" "Why not?" demands the blonde....... "It is a box of Frosties!" says the man ----------------------------------------------- Maturity and wisdom do not occur overnight. Stupidity on the otherhand, can happen in the blink of an eye!!!!

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