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Jera
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Posted - 2003.10.19 16:41:00 -
[1]
Results from independant laboratories* research at last unleashed, rumors about Quafe toxicity reveal to be true !
High doses of dangerous elements were found in Classic Quafe(tm), Light Quafe(tm), and Cherry Quafe(tm) at least.
Quafe´ne builds dependency and destructs synaps, which leads to brain damage and implants malfunctions.
Quafacetone causes hallucinations and may be responsible of the recent uprising of mindlocks.
Quafetyd is a toxin, which destroys reproduction cells and causes cloning rejects.
For your own safety, before official decisions are made, stop drinking Quafe ! Hopefully, the universe wont stay without a trustable softdrink, stay tuned thristy people, yet another time a solution should show up from the Caldari side !
*theses independant laboratories wished to stay anonymous, in accordance with the Caldari laws on hazardous researchs.
Discuss loyalty to the State issues on the 'Caldari' channel
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Viceroy
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Posted - 2003.10.19 18:01:00 -
[2]
I heard they use isogen to make quafe.
well beer > quafe anyway
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Nariko Tenrai
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Posted - 2003.10.19 18:22:00 -
[3]
I heard that Quafe is people.
- - - -
I have measured and described the stars, their great and countless multitude. What man has seen their revolutions and entrances? Not even the angels see their number, yet I have recorded all their names.
- The Book of the Secrets of Enoch, Jewish Pseudepigrapha
We won't talk about how many cruisers I lost this weekend, nor how many nice railguns, or T2 enhancers. We're going to skip right over that. We're going to talk about my new Raven. It is like flying a small city, and the city's only export is missiles.
- Azeraphel |
Danton Marcellus
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Posted - 2003.10.19 20:49:00 -
[4]
There is no cherry quafe, the gallentean population drinking this abomination of a beverage all died of a vicious venereal virus strain. 
Convert Stations
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Khal St
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Posted - 2003.10.20 10:28:00 -
[5]
Edited by: Khal St on 20/10/2003 10:28:56
Remeber!! Triax's Cal-afe(tm) meets all Caldari Food & Drug administration most stringent tests!
And its only half the price of Quafe in the Caldari core systems!!!
(availability may vary, may cause abnormal blood lust in non-Caldari)
So don't delay try Cal-afe today!
Taste the difference!
Its All Just Biz
Only the insane prosper, only those who prosper can truly judge what is sane...
Try TXI's Cal-afeÖ - That Caldari Power Taste!
and now..
Tri-StarsiÖ - Power, Wealth & Revenge!
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AnIntrepidCosmonaut
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Posted - 2003.10.20 10:43:00 -
[6]
Edited by: AnIntrepidCosmonaut on 20/10/2003 10:46:22
I KNEW IT!!!
I was getting suspicious after my son grew a third eye after he drank 3 cans in a row.
We will hold the Quafe Company and the Gallente Federation responsible for allowing this to happen.
Edit: The bill for his surgery will be sent accordingly
--------------------------------------------
It's not the size of your ship that matters, it's how you use it. |
Road Kill
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Posted - 2003.10.20 10:48:00 -
[7]
Edited by: Road Kill on 20/10/2003 10:52:31
Edited by: Road Kill on 20/10/2003 10:52:04
That's it I'm gonna Su' I was told to avoid all Quaffine by the Doc. so I could su' the doc as well especially as she recommended that particular beverage, said it had none in at all the healthiest drink in the galaxy she told me.. "Calm down Roadie" heart racing now..."Breath" Hehe Now I know why the doc became a beneficiary of all my fortunes.. (well Debt - not that she knew that)..
http://www.ukmn.net/verge/verge_banner.gif
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Sarkos
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Posted - 2003.10.20 14:42:00 -
[8]
You seemed to forget the very popular, at least in Minmatar space, Quafe 'POWER'. This popular drink contains all you need to replenish spent body chemicals from strenuous workouts as well as massive amounts of sugar and concentrated caffine.
Either free the slaves or we will come and get them.
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Skillz
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Posted - 2003.10.20 23:22:00 -
[9]
The Quafe factories accept garbage as a trade commodity.
Keep on flaming, lamers.
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Shintoko Akahoshi
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Posted - 2003.10.21 18:53:00 -
[10]
IforonewouldhavetoagreewithSarkosQuafe'POWER'
isafinefinedrinkIdrinkitallthetimeIfindthatit
reallyhelpswithmyreactiontimeswhenpilotingmy
shipaswellasimprovingmyshorttermmemoryallinall
Ifindaboutsixcansofitmakesagoodcombinationwith
aninhalerfullofvassopressintheonlysideeffectI
coulddowithoutisaslightshakinginmyhandsaswell
asallthesegiantfurrybatsthatarecirclingmyhead
alwayscirclingcirclingcirclingphGodthebatsthe
batsgetthemoffameohmyGodtherecomingouttathe
walls
There's no meaning to life when you cling only to common sense |
Dau Imperius
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Posted - 2003.10.21 19:52:00 -
[11]
Who said there's no Cherry flavored Quafe? Why just the other day I found it, and the re-make of the old Vanilla falvored one.
Some people just have no taste buds in thier genes anymore. *coughs a few times at the Galls* But I suppose these rumours about Quafe may indeed be true. I never touch the stuff, prefering other drinks instead. But I do hope something is done about those Galls wth two mouths who drink it....it's bad enough having to hear them speak with one.
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Talon SilverHawk
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Posted - 2003.10.22 09:00:00 -
[12]
Edited by: Talon SilverHawk on 22/10/2003 09:20:20
After investigating the reports from concerned consumers of Quafe, We got an undercover reporter into the Quafe factory at no small risk. After several days and some close brushes with Quafe security he made it back out with some surprising and terrible news.
Quafe is made from a derivative of Soylent Green !!! thus explaining the use of biomass within the Eve universe.
We must stop this now .........
Tal
What goes around comes around
What goes around comes around...
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Athule Snanm
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Posted - 2003.10.22 11:09:00 -
[13]
Every time I gaze on the beauty of the galaxy I am reminded of its bubbliscious taste! You can expect the unexpected when you drink QuafeÖ - every sip is an adventure in refeshment!
_______________________________
Doomheim - EVE's only hygiene! |
Tommy Boy
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Posted - 2003.10.22 11:40:00 -
[14]
New report don't drink Quafe because the gall suck and are shipping arms into and out of Caldari space. More than likely arming pirate activity along the Caldari-Gal border. The time is now fellow Caldari. Stop whimpering of the long lasted "peace" The pesky Gal only wish to use "peace" as a license to **** people off and I say NO MORE!!!!
Proud Member of the Takahashi Syndicate
Empyrean Federation Member
_____________________
Times have to change
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Khal St
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Posted - 2003.10.22 11:41:00 -
[15]
Edited by: Khal St on 22/10/2003 11:44:15
Athule?
Has your rigorous training for the championship caused you to overdose on Quafe UltraÖ?
I sincerely hope they dont do any random 'Quafe´ne' testing  It appears Jade may have left one too many cases in your hangar!
I'm sure some Amarrian Ale or a nice refreshing can of Cal-afeÖ to off set all those Gallente stimulants will return you to your normal self... 
Is it true Quafe are giving free medium ammo away with every crate of Quafe to offset the impact of Cal-afeÖ on there (once secure)Caldari market? 
Its All Just Biz
Only the insane prosper, only those who prosper can truly judge what is sane...
Try TXI's Cal-afeÖ - That Caldari Power Taste!
and now..
Tri-StarsiÖ - Power, Wealth & Revenge!
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