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Silverbackyererse
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
124
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Posted - 2015.02.02 11:12:04 -
[31] - Quote
The scene is set, the night is cold, the campfire is burning, the esky is full and the stars twinkle in the dark night sky...
Three hang-glider pilots, one from Australia, one from South Africa and the other from New Zealand, are sitting round a campfire near Ayers Rock, each embroiled with the bravado for which they are famous.
A night of tall tales of manliness begins....
Kiven, the Kiwi says, "I must be the meanest, toughest heng glider dude there us. Why, just the other day, I linded in a field and scared a crocodile thet got loose from the swamp. Et ate sux men before I wrestled ut to the ground weth my bare hends end beat ut's bliddy 'ed un!"
Jerry from South Africa typically can't stand to be bettered. "Well you guys, I lended orfter a 200 mile flight on a tiny treck, ind a fifteen foot Namibian desert snike slid out from under a rock and made a move for me.
I grebbed thet borsted with my bare hinds and tore it's head orf ind sucked the poison down in one gulp. Ind I'm still here today to tell the story!".
Bruce the Aussie, remained silent, continuing to slowly poke the fire with his old fella. |
IbanezLaney
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
1367
|
Posted - 2015.02.03 02:06:55 -
[32] - Quote
Van was a hard working man who escaped from Vietnam to start a new life in Australia.
He had limited English but wanted to work hard and build a better life.
After days of looking for a job he saw a building site and decided to try and get a job there.
Eventually he found the site Foreman and was given a job.
'OK Van - I will put you with a group of builders you are in charge of their supplies' He said.
Grateful for someone giving him a chance Van promised to work hard and do the best job he could with the supplies.
After 3-4 hours one of the builders said 'Where did the new guy go ??? He disappeared within a minute of starting!!!'
A second later Van jumps out from behind a pile of bricks and yells 'SUPPLIES!!'
Docked since 2009.
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Silverbackyererse
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
125
|
Posted - 2015.02.04 12:09:23 -
[33] - Quote
Breaking News...........
New Zealanders work out how to get sheep pregnant more often. 
http://www.weeklytimesnow.com.au/business/sheep/new-zealand-study-works-out-how-to-get-sheep-pregnant-more-often/story-fnker8up-1227207849996
Who'd have thought.  |
IbanezLaney
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
1370
|
Posted - 2015.02.09 09:07:08 -
[34] - Quote
A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."
https://soundcloud.com/ibanezlaney
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Mr Lewie Unknown
Conoco.
Caldari Armed Forces.
0
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Posted - 2015.02.09 10:09:03 -
[35] - Quote
http://eveboard.com/pilot/Mr_Lewie_Unknown I should be already in. |
greg01
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
44
|
Posted - 2015.02.09 23:07:16 -
[36] - Quote
CSC seem to be doing rather well in recruiting AU/NZ time zone players for Caldari Faction Warfare. Hence, we're kicking Galmil's arse in lowsec.
So, we're still looking to recruit more AU/NZ players that enjoy being drunk talking about their sexual exploits (Laney) whilst killing the Galmil scumbags.
We're looking to have so many Aussies that Crosi Wesdo will nominate us for our own sever!
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Silverbackyererse
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
125
|
Posted - 2015.02.19 07:10:55 -
[37] - Quote
An Australian, a Frenchman and a Canadian are bragging about their sexual escapades with their respective wives.
GÇ£After I have zee reelationz wiz my wifeGÇÖGÇ¥ said the Frenchman, GÇ£I cover her wiz crepes suzette and eat it sensually off her silky bare skin. She becomes so excited she rises centimetres off ze bed.GÇ¥
GÇ£After I've giv'n er the good news,GÇ¥ drawled the Canadian, GÇ£I pour maple syrup on her and lick it off slowly. SheGÇÖs in so much goddam ecstasy she rises feet off the bed eh.GÇ¥
GÇ£Me?GÇ¥, says the Aussie. GÇ£When IGÇÖve finished with my old lady I wipe the old fella on the curtains and she hits the roof!GÇ¥
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BonezFW
The Church of Awesome
Caldari State Capturing
0
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Posted - 2015.03.11 09:33:13 -
[38] - Quote
What do you call a sheep in a kiwi's yard?
Ride on lawn mower |
Silverbackyererse
The Church of Awesome
Heiian Conglomerate
140
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Posted - 2015.05.04 09:49:05 -
[39] - Quote
Recruitment closed for now. We may make exceptions for old friends and gurls. |
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