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AeonOfTime
Minmatar
Syrkos Technologies
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Posted - 2007.08.08 16:00:00 -
[1]
One of the things that bugged me from the moment I was able to pilot a battleship was that the crews of these ships are never mentioned. I can not remember where I read about his, otherwise I would post a link - but some battleships have up to a thousand crew members... All of which die if the ship goes down, leaving only the pilot.
I have started a short fiction on pilot-crew relationships, and would like to know what you guys & girls think of it. It's called "Crystalline Trouble" and features a somewhat different pod pilot named Alea Zatar and her battleship's chief engineer, Tarellek Malear.
Here's a short excerpt:
"She was the only pilot he knew that would look him in the eyes without that detachment other pilots had conditioned themselves for. It was dangerous for pilots to get attached to their crew - the loss of a ship always meant losing the intricate connection to it as well as the crew, and no pilot can sustain the repeated pain."
<a href="http://eve.aeonoftime.com/stories/crystalline_trouble.php">Read the story here</a>
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Read the captain's log at eve.aeonoftime.com
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AeonOfTime
Minmatar
Syrkos Technologies
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Posted - 2007.09.06 15:31:00 -
[2]
Chapters list:
1. Calm before the storm
2. Jumping into the fray
3. Beaten and trapped
4. Into the unknown
5. Further into ruin
6. Calm after the storm
7. Fixing things
8. Out-of-pod experiences (NEW)
9. A goddess rises (NEW)
10. Tunnel dwellers (IN PROGRESS)
06.09.2007: Added another two chapters.
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Read the captain's log at eve.aeonoftime.com
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Feng Schui
Minmatar
The Ninja Coalition
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Posted - 2007.09.07 06:02:00 -
[3]
damn you. got to chapter 10.. and... nothing...
MORE
The Beginning <-- crap quality, need to redo, sorry :( |
Deviana Sevidon
Gallente
Cataclysm Enterprises
Kraftwerk.
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Posted - 2007.09.07 06:59:00 -
[4]
Nice story so far, but I only came to read the two chapters yet. There are a few minor thing that bug me. First Aleas Abaddon is described as a 20 year old ship, but from what I understand the Abaddon is like all Tier 3 Battleships a relative new design. The prototypes completed after the rise of capsuleer pilots, but still primarily constructed for non-capsuleer crews and captains.
Second thing is, Aleas ship fitting, is able to let most Amarr-pilots whince in pain. I mean primarily a shield tank on an Abaddon with added Armor Repair abilities? 
It seems like nitpicking here, but the story could do better if Aleas ship was not so badly outfitted.
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AeonOfTime
Minmatar
Syrkos Technologies
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Posted - 2007.09.07 08:22:00 -
[5]
Edited by: AeonOfTime on 07/09/2007 08:26:41
 Originally by: Deviana Sevidon
Nice story so far, but I only came to read the two chapters yet. There are a few minor thing that bug me. First Aleas Abaddon is described as a 20 year old ship, but from what I understand the Abaddon is like all Tier 3 Battleships a relative new design. The prototypes completed after the rise of capsuleer pilots, but still primarily constructed for non-capsuleer crews and captains.
This is a part that gets me confused. I know the Abaddon was introduced not long ago in RL, but how does that relate to in-game time? I mean if we get down to it, the oldest pilots from our standpoint are about four years old. Putting that into perspective is not easy :\
Originally by: Deviana Sevidon
Second thing is, Aleas ship fitting, is able to let most Amarr-pilots whince in pain. I mean primarily a shield tank on an Abaddon with added Armor Repair abilities?
It seems like nitpicking here, but the story could do better if Aleas ship was not so badly outfitted.
And you are right of course - that fitting is taken from my own Abaddon a while back. I trained for shield tanking, then switched to Amarr ships :) My current fitting is a real Armor tank though, so I will definitely rewrite that part.
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Read the captain's log at eve.aeonoftime.com
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Feng Schui
Minmatar
The Ninja Coalition
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Posted - 2007.09.07 08:23:00 -
[6]
Edited by: Feng Schui on 07/09/2007 08:27:54
You should see his minmatar ships 
Though.. I can see as RL time not being equal to Eve time tbh.. 1 week RL time = 1 year game time is how I envision it personally. (This comes from the Titans story, that said some of them are decades? centuries? old...)
Originally by: The Titans
Some of these mammoth vessels have taken decades to assemble. Many are over a century old themselves, and the three mammoth Jovian motherships, the first Titans, have origins pre-dating modern space travel. They are maintained with constant upgrades, and at any given time, one of the three is out of commission while undergoing retrofits.
The Beginning <-- crap quality, need to redo, sorry :( |
AeonOfTime
Minmatar
Syrkos Technologies
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Posted - 2007.09.07 08:32:00 -
[7]
Originally by: Feng Schui
You should see his minmatar ships
Oh you mean the part where I fitted lasers on my Maelstrom :D
That was fun, but I really did everything wrong. I started as a Minmatar and trained for shield tanking (which was ok for minnie ships) and lasers because I liked them (which only Amarr ships are designed for). Incidentally Amarr ships are made for armor tanking, so when I switched I shield tanked them while I trained armor tanking support skills :)
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Read the captain's log at eve.aeonoftime.com
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Deviana Sevidon
Gallente
Cataclysm Enterprises
Kraftwerk.
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Posted - 2007.09.07 08:45:00 -
[8]
You did still show some good writing skills.
About the age of the Abaddon, it is difficult to say, because CCP never released some roleplaying background about the the sudden appearance of Tier 3 BS and Tier 2 BC. From my view it can be safely assumed that these ships, as they were introduced as Tech 1, were being developed by the Empires for a long time, before being released. So it is still possible that there were even two decade old prototypes of this ship, that somehow find their way into the hands of a capsuleer and it might even being interesting to write a story about, how this happened. But I do not think, that an average Abaddon is of such an old age.
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AeonOfTime
Minmatar
Syrkos Technologies
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Posted - 2007.09.07 10:04:00 -
[9]
Originally by: Deviana Sevidon
You did still show some good writing skills.
Thanks indeed.
Originally by: Deviana Sevidon
About the age of the Abaddon, it is difficult to say, because CCP never released some roleplaying background about the the sudden appearance of Tier 3 BS and Tier 2 BC. From my view it can be safely assumed that these ships, as they were introduced as Tech 1, were being developed by the Empires for a long time, before being released. So it is still possible that there were even two decade old prototypes of this ship, that somehow find their way into the hands of a capsuleer and it might even being interesting to write a story about, how this happened. But I do not think, that an average Abaddon is of such an old age.
That sounds good. I think I will include a little background as to how she came by that ship to clarify things. It would add to the fact that she chose her crew personally.
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Read the captain's log at eve.aeonoftime.com
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Decidis
Caldari
ASGARD SECURITY SHIPPING PRODUCTION
SMASH Alliance
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Posted - 2007.09.07 21:40:00 -
[10]
Excellent story, eagerly awaiting the next few chapters. 
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ThaMa Gebir
Gallente
Raddick Explorations
Executive Outcomes
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Posted - 2007.09.16 18:14:00 -
[11]
The past. It can be re-written to describe something that may or may not have happened, or twisted with certain events as proof of such events happening.
Eventually it all comes down to one thing; The past is past, we can only hope someone has all of it recorded so we can hopefully find out with real information.
(OOC; I would wait until the ships are written into the prime fiction before we really discuss the origins).
On a side, OP; Awesome story, I want more...
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Confirmed heaviest member of RDEX........
Hah, no more hijacks here. |
Jason Marshall
Hammer Of Light
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Posted - 2007.09.25 12:57:00 -
[12]
Having it be a 2 decade old prototype would certainly support the design flaws and planning of certain placement of acid carrying systems.
I love the story so far! i only wish i woulda found it when i was more awake and it was 3am. CANT WAIT FOR MORE!
Tacky Lensflares in sigs ftw
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AeonOfTime
Minmatar
Syrkos Technologies
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Posted - 2007.10.03 18:04:00 -
[13]
Bump! Added two new chapters :)
Excerpt from chapter 10:
"As wonderful as the situation may have seemed, he knew that Alea's newfound ability was as much a blessing as a curse. For instance, they would not be able to contain the information. Once they would be in communication range again or docked at a station, word of this would spread faster than the most expensive interceptor can warp. How would the Minmatar government react? And counterintelligence? He could already imagine numbers of officials, hired mercenaries and undercover agents chasing them. Alea's abilities could revolutionize the capsuleer world, so whoever had an interest in that world would be forced to take action, good or bad."
I have been updating my style a bit, especially for the dialogues. I spent some time re-reading a few books as inspiration... will redo the dialogues of the first chapters in time too.
Read from chapter 10
Read the whole story
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Read the captain's log at eve.aeonoftime.com
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Jason Marshall
Hammer Of Light
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Posted - 2007.10.06 13:34:00 -
[14]
Such a good story! :D Cant wait for more!
Tacky Lensflares in sigs ftw
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Jason Marshall
Wise Guys
Exquisite Malevolence
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Posted - 2007.10.26 19:38:00 -
[15]
Really cant wait for more! And this hsould be on the front page.
Tacky Lensflares in sigs ftw
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Bob Veers
Amarr
Caelli-Merced INC.
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Posted - 2007.10.29 22:25:00 -
[16]
Must have more, great story by the way.
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Zephius II
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Posted - 2007.11.09 19:20:00 -
[17]
Bump for a great story while I am waiting for more 
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Ethaet
Gallente
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Posted - 2007.11.20 18:43:00 -
[18]
Great story. Please write more 
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TQ has encountered a database issue, we are sitting around wondering why it has crashed this time, waiting for 500,000 petitions and watching the forums fill up.
Post with your alt! |
Jason Marshall
Hammer Of Light
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Posted - 2007.12.24 10:57:00 -
[19]
To the front page! Great writing i want more D:
Tacky Lensflares in sigs ftw
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Dietric Kalarn
Legacy State
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Posted - 2008.01.23 18:32:00 -
[20]
Came across this earlier today, was a good read.
Would like more :)
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Jason Marshall
Hammer Of Light
Hydra Alliance
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Posted - 2008.03.14 20:13:00 -
[21]
Give meh more man D:
Tacky Lensflares in sigs ftw
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