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Raktar Medovski
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:18:00 -
[1]
Look. I know that there are assassins after me. I can hear them usually when I am trying to fall asleep. It is annoying. I've learned to grow weary of assassins ever since my dad was killed by one hiding in a couch. I have honed my senses.
So I ask whoever is sending them to please stop.
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Verone
Veto.
Veto Corp
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:22:00 -
[2]
Man, being killed by your sofa would suck.
>>> TRIBUTE TO A FALLEN WINGMAN <<<
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The Herrick
Gallente
Eve University
Ivy League
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:26:00 -
[3]
Your couch? Damn is nothing sacred anymore?
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Alowishus
Cobra-Kai
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:30:00 -
[4]
I push my couch into the airlock a few times a week to make sure nobody is hiding in it. I thought I was paranoid but now I'm not sure.
Cobra-Kai [SN4K3] recruitment. |
Raktar Medovski
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:36:00 -
[5]
Edited by: Raktar Medovski on 03/01/2008 20:36:58
 Originally by: Alowishus
I push my couch into the airlock a few times a week to make sure nobody is hiding in it. I thought I was paranoid but now I'm not sure.
You are smart to do this. Anyone could be behind that thing. Or under the pillows.
I have a couch in my crew lounge, but it has turrets made to recognize assassins.
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Alowishus
Cobra-Kai
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:43:00 -
[6]
I had those turrets but they shot my cat. Cats are sneaky and it mistook her slinking, sneaky moves as those of an assassin. All that was left was fur. Fortunately the cat was left by my ex-girlfriend and I really do believe the thing was trying to kill me, or at least get fur on my black pants.
Cobra-Kai [SN4K3] recruitment. |
Raktar Medovski
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Posted - 2008.01.03 20:45:00 -
[7]
Originally by: Alowishus
I had those turrets but they shot my cat. Cats are sneaky and it mistook her slinking, sneaky moves as those of an assassin. All that was left was fur. Fortunately the cat was left by my ex-girlfriend and I really do believe the thing was trying to kill me, or at least get fur on my black pants.
It's good to know they work.
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GulletSplitter
Minmatar
Colonial Fleet Services
Independent Faction
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Posted - 2008.01.04 00:11:00 -
[8]
Wha? Ex-girlfriends typically don't work. That's why I always kick them out....no more freeloading off of me.
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Nachshon
Caldari
Gradient
Electus Matari
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Posted - 2008.01.07 14:27:00 -
[9]
I have bodyguards. They're Brutors, equipped with Khumaaks. They do a very good job of cleaning up messes, though from time to time, a corpse with Angel Cartel tats shows up in the janitor's locker.
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Caldari by birth, Minmatar by citizenship.
The True Meaning of Freedom |
Mad Scorpion
Minmatar
Masuat'aa Matari
Ushra'Khan
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Posted - 2008.01.07 15:11:00 -
[10]
Whoa!
If it was me, I'm sorry. You see recently I was docked at a Thukkars Mix station and got a room at a cheap dive, you know the kind, the one right down the hall from the strip bar. In the lobby was this machine that when you inserted an ISK, various humorous messages would be displayed. The last ten or so times I did it, while drunk, it read "Congratulations! You have won an assassin. Enter a target or press end to assign a random target." Being drunk I just hit the button. I didn't know.
By the way, I had an encounter with an assassin in this same place. He was hidden behind the loo.
Mad Scorpion |
jtps
Minmatar
Si chou zhi lu
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Posted - 2008.01.07 15:49:00 -
[11]
Curse those damned couches, whatever will assasins think of next!
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Raznarok
Apostles of Insanity
Rare Faction
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Posted - 2008.01.07 20:38:00 -
[12]
Originally by: The Herrick
Your couch? Damn is nothing sacred anymore?
What he said
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Andreus Ixiris
Gallente
Heretic Army
The Covenant Alliance
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Posted - 2008.01.07 20:51:00 -
[13]
Well I can't say for sure, but I'm pretty sure at least one Amarrian loyalist has sent an assassin after me. I'm not certain but there was this time back in TDE when I went into a bar on the SMASH station there and there was an attractive Minmatar with a very badly-concealed gun (or at least, badly concealed to my vision - given that I almost always have a high-range Occular Filter installed - a few unmodified people might have fallen for it) who came and sat down on the barstool next to the one I chose. He continually bought me drinks, and so I reciprocated, thinking that he was attracted to me.
After about four shots of Jin-Meian Mei-Keui-Lu, he got up, pulled out the gun, and, wobbling wildly all over the place, screamed something that I could only make out as "DEPTH TO THE ENEMAS OF MARS!", shot the barman six times and, running lopsidedly out of the bar, jumped right over the safety rail and fell two thousand metres onto the highway thoroughfare below. There was barely enough of him left to recycle into a quarter of a clone's worth of biomass.
I've always wondered who was desperate enough to kill me that they'd employ such an incompetent assassin, or if, in fact, the barman was the target - which would make the assassin even more incompetent, since the barman survived with fairly minor injuries.
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"I am prepared to meet my maker; whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter." |
Mi Lai
Cutting Edge Incorporated
RAZOR Alliance
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Posted - 2008.01.07 21:03:00 -
[14]
I wish you eyes in the back of your head to stay safe.
Just remember; just that you are not paranoid doesnt mean they aren't out to get you.
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Arelius Sarum
Amarr
Exodus.
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Posted - 2008.01.08 00:36:00 -
[15]
My estates are heavily protected by Kameiras sent by my family. The only place they could hope to assasinate me is in space, but my Armageddon is no easy target either, not to mention I have my mates nearby.
Perhaps you should do the same.
Per ardua ad astra - Through Adversity, to the Stars |
Andreus Ixiris
Gallente
Heretic Army
The Covenant Alliance
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Posted - 2008.01.08 03:35:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Arelius Sarum
My estates are heavily protected by Kameiras sent by my family. The only place they could hope to assasinate me is in space, but my Armageddon is no easy target either, not to mention I have my mates nearby.
Perhaps you should do the same.
Kind of difficult considering that the other empires frown on Kameiras.
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"I am prepared to meet my maker; whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter." |
Arelius Sarum
Amarr
Exodus.
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Posted - 2008.01.08 07:46:00 -
[17]
Originally by: Andreus Ixiris
Kind of difficult considering that the other empires frown on Kameiras.
They are simply jealous that the Empire managed to train such fine troops out of slaves.
Per ardua ad astra - Through Adversity, to the Stars |
Andreus Ixiris
Gallente
Heretic Army
The Covenant Alliance
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Posted - 2008.01.08 13:17:00 -
[18]
Well I'll presume that makes them much better military personnel than the 7th Fleet - not that you'd find it easy to be much worse.
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"I am prepared to meet my maker; whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter." |
Mebrithiel Ju'wien
Veto Corp
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Posted - 2008.01.08 14:59:00 -
[19]
The best defence is an army of devout religious fanatics that thirst for blood.
I've not had any assassins get past that, but I've had fun with people trying to get in my knickers in the past...
Personal Library |
Raktar Medovski
Gallente
Knights Order
Dread Sovereign
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Posted - 2008.01.08 15:56:00 -
[20]
Now, now. This is about pesky asssassins. Not about who enslaves who.
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