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Shirley Serious
Imperial Academy
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Posted - 2008.05.31 11:54:00 -
[1]
Hi
Do you know anyone going through a mid-life crisis? I know a couple, and a pattern seems to be forming.
All the people I know of that have gone through mid-life crises - adultery, yachts, motorcycles etc. all seem to be more financially secure than the people that I know who haven't had any midlife crises.
Do you know Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs? does that explain it? Are poorer people less likely to have a mid-life crisis because they are more concerned about more basic things?
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Toshiro GreyHawk
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Posted - 2008.05.31 12:29:00 -
[2]
Edited by: Toshiro GreyHawk on 31/05/2008 12:30:28
(That link doesn't produce anything but a message from Wikipedia that they can't find it).
I've heard a lot of inaccurate descriptions of mid life crisis (mostly made by women making fun of the men going through it).
1) Male Menopause. No - no such thing. You ladies get that one all to yourselves. Women go through various stages of their lives, Childhood when the world is a wonder, young adulthood when they can have children but it's not such a good idea, their prime child bearing years where if they are going to have children this is the time to do it, post prime child bearing years when they might still be able to have children but it is no longer such a good idea and finally post child bearing years when they can no longer have children.
Men don't go through that. There is one change in a man's life and it only effects his attitude to one thing. Puberty. Before Puberty girls are a nuisance. After puberty they are much more interesting. The same little kid that is playing with his monster trucks in the back yard - owns a real truck as a young man. He may have to trade it in on a mini van once he gets married and has kids - but he still wants that truck and some guys do manage to keep them. Also there's no natural cut and dried end to a males ability to father children. His reproductive abilities decline gradually as he gets older but that's about it and it's not that uncommon for a 70 year old man to be able to father a child if he can get some woman young enough to have one to go along with it. Tony Randal is who I have in mind here.
So, Male Menopause is just wishful thinking on the part of women whose misery wants company.
2) "He's trying to recapture his youth". No not that either.
As to poor men going through mid life crisis, I'm sure it happens but they just don't have the financial means to make any one notice.
For the guys who do have some money, what's going on is that he's come to the realization that there are certain things he's only got so many years left to do. Once you get into middle age you really start to feel the limitations of your years. You first start having trouble doing all those things you did in your twenties when you get into your thirties but here, it's just that you can't do things as well as you did them before. Once you start getting into your fifties you start running into things you can't do at all any more.
So, you have men in their late forties and early fifties who have put off a lot of things they would have liked to do or enjoyed doing in the past. They got married, had kids, bought a house, had pets, etc., etc. and that took up all their time, money and energy for a good 20 years.
Now, here in middle age, the kids are grown, the house is substantially paid off, he may or may not still have a wife and - his career has progressed to the point where he is now in his prime earning years. Thus, unless it's all going for alimony, he's got money and time on his hands.
Couple that with the realization that he will soon no longer be able to do or at least enjoy the doing of many of the things he's wanted to do all his life - and you have some guy going out and getting those things done while he still can.
The fancy sports car he buys may have been something he's wanted since he was 7 years old and only now does he actually have the money to buy one.
Going out and chasing young girls - well if he's ever going to do it again - he'd better do it now. Young girls might find a fit, healthy fifty year old with money to spend on ski trips to aspen a fun guy to hang out with. Once he reaches sixty ... not so much.
So, the guy starts trying to get back into shape after all those years of just pushing a pencil and sitting in a swivel chair.
It isn't that the person has changed. They're still the same person they always were. They're just trying to get some things done they've always wanted to do while they still can.
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Shirley Serious
Imperial Academy
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Posted - 2008.05.31 12:59:00 -
[3]
Originally by: Toshiro GreyHawk
(That link doesn't produce anything but a message from Wikipedia that they can't find it).
bah, try now?
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Slade Trillgon
Siorai Iontach Brotherhood of the Spider
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Posted - 2008.05.31 13:38:00 -
[4]
Could not have said it better myself Toshiro.
That beings said, I would not call anything males experience male menopause, but there is a definite decrease in testosterone production which some males may be a little more reactive to this decrease then others. The reaction, by no means, is even close to what females experiance and I like your analogy of misery likes company
Slade
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LUH 3471
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Posted - 2008.05.31 14:06:00 -
[5]
Edited by: LUH 3471 on 31/05/2008 14:11:38 mid life crisis is because for alot of poeple in this culture there is a great diffrence between
a) the outer personality that gets projected and b) the inner personality
it is usually poeple who never got into spirituality
these poeple try to cover up their inner problems up by outside things like cloth and shiny cars is nothing wrong with shiny cars and/or cool cloth themselfs of course - they are dead objects it depends wholly on the intelligence of the person, which uses them
after 30-40 years living with this great rift between outer and inner personalitie there comes naturally depression this is a natural reaction and a signpost of nature which says basicly : "you cannot run away from yourself no matter how much paint you apply outside" poeple are so confused in their complicated mind that they even cant read this simple message of nature and need big big books to eplain to them this
pretty sad
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Surfin's PlunderBunny
Sebiestor tribe
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Posted - 2008.05.31 14:13:00 -
[6]
Life's half over, they're afraid of death... it's a coping mechanism
The simple answer is usually the correct one
I doubt I'll have one, had so many "this is it" moments the thought of it doesn't bother me at all any more
() () (â;..;)â (")(") |
LUH 3471
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Posted - 2008.05.31 14:19:00 -
[7]
Edited by: LUH 3471 on 31/05/2008 14:22:06
Originally by: Surfin's PlunderBunny Life's half over, they're afraid of death... it's a coping mechanism
The simple answer is usually the correct one
I doubt I'll have one, had so many "this is it" moments the thought of it doesn't bother me at all any more
the simple answer is that
poeple are not afraid of death but life itself they are afraid of the flow of life they want it their way not the way of the universe so this naturally has to end in suffering and confusion the universe is good and simple in nature
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