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How to explain EVE changes. For dummies.

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Roxanna Kell Caldari Provisions	Posted - 2008.11.07 12:39:00 - [1] Edited by: Roxanna Kell on 07/11/2008 12:39:38 This is in response to the EVE is dying Threads Well for this i would like to use a metaphor. Lets think about sex as a game. and that game is eve-online (escapist entertainment). it simply help you forget about the real world while you play it, you plug in too much and it becomes an addiction. And each new patch is a new Girl friend/wife (A guy model if you re finfleet), You may not like your new girl, but she still gives you pleasure, she may be laggy or fast. she may cook lots of food for you, or make you live on take away, at the end you don't complain as much cause you may just be using her as a sex machine. So there you go, Quantum is the newst b*h on the block, and she is skinny, with freckles and a thing for miners. she likes it kinky, so have a different kind of fun dressed up in uniforms with ribbons and medals on it. Frankly I am more worried about the bh who can't get off playing sims. she ll be here soon. Quote: There is no Dishonor in winning fools, so do it any way you can.
Sheriff Jones Amarr Clinical Experiment	Posted - 2008.11.07 12:44:00 - [2] Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 07/11/2008 12:45:21 looks at post notices lack of success in game->sex reference corrects situation Patching EVE is like making love to a beautiful woman; no matter how good the sex, or how hard it was getting it "in", it's gonna **** some people off that you did. Or in Sheriff Jones terms; You may not like it, she may be ugly, but either way, you're gonna get ***ed. My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit.*
Elitia Gibberish Industries	Posted - 2008.11.07 14:09:00 - [3] In many ways, playing EVE is like making love, to a beautiful woman. You've got to make sure your tackle is clean and working. Then you spend some time maneuvering your intended target in to just the right position. And when you've got them just how you want them, you whip out your cannon, Fire off your ammo, and leave them a quivering mass of jelly, wondering what happened. -Mishallia Venari
ShardowRhino Caldari Legion 0f The Damned	Posted - 2008.11.07 16:15:00 - [4] damn and to think i thought i seriously need to get laid! I need to get laid bad but theres no way im going to think of EVE as a chick named Eve. EVE is a lot like a game you pay in some form to play. they add stuff which is going to **** off someone. Then someone is going to make some insane connection between sex and playing an online game. LEts face it if your going to suggest that an online game is anything resembling sex, at least pick a game that has more then a mug shot to represent the females, okay?
Roxanna Kell Caldari Provisions	Posted - 2008.11.07 16:19:00 - [5] Edited by: Roxanna Kell on 07/11/2008 16:18:50 Originally by: ShardowRhino damn and to think i thought i seriously need to get laid! I need to get laid bad but theres no way im going to think of EVE as a chick named Eve. EVE is a lot like a game you pay in some form to play. they add stuff which is going to ** off someone. Then someone is going to make some insane connection between sex and playing an online game. LEts face it if your going to suggest that an online game is anything resembling sex, at least pick a game that has more then a mug shot to represent the females, okay? I think i was referring more to being in the good things category, rather than the game being equal to sex, i mean are you stonned to think that i would compare anything to sex, not even chocolate buster. Quote:** There is no Dishonor in winning fools, so do it any way you can.
Sheriff Jones Amarr Clinical Experiment	Posted - 2008.11.07 16:21:00 - [6] Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 07/11/2008 16:20:58 Originally by: Roxanna Kell I think i was referring more to being in the good things category, rather than the game being equal to sex, i mean are you stonned to think that i would compare anything to sex, not even chocolate buster. Yeah seriously, EVE vs sex, as if there's any competition. waits Yeah i said EVE wins too My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit.
Another Liberthas Caldari Galactic Rangers	Posted - 2008.11.07 16:27:00 - [7] Originally by: Sheriff Jones Yeah seriously, EVE vs sex, as if there's any competition. waits Yeah i said EVE wins too If I could get some sexy-time as easily as I could load EVE... :D
Sheriff Jones Amarr Clinical Experiment	Posted - 2008.11.07 16:30:00 - [8] Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 07/11/2008 16:34:23 Originally by: Another Liberthas If I could get some sexy-time as easily as I could load EVE... :D By paying for it? To be fair, i also had; "Via the internet?" "In a queue after 30.000 other nerds?" and "With one hand on your "mouse"?" My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit.
Rakshasa Taisab Caldari Sane Industries Inc. Ursa Stellar Initiative	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:01:00 - [9] I see people are taking advantage of the one time of the year that the GM's, etc, are likely to be away sexing up their game.
MS Stanis Arcana Imperii Ltd. Atlas Alliance	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:09:00 - [10] I get the patch part its quite commen in the age of the internet, but what is up with this sex thing? I didnt catch that word in my book of trendy words.
RedSplat Suddenly Ninjas Tear Extraction And Reclamation Service	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:17:00 - [11] Eve change for dummies: FOTM -> Nerf -> New FOTM -> Nerf Or maybe i'm the dummy
ramification	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:37:00 - [12] Originally by: RedSplat Eve change for dummies: FOTM -> Nerf -> New FOTM -> Nerf Or maybe i'm the dummy Darwin was a dummy too, what with his "Species -> Death -> Better adapted Species -> Death" horse****. What did that beardy tosser think he was on about, anyway?
Kweel Nakashyn Minmatar Aeden	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:45:00 - [13] Damn guys, I think you play too much the game : Sex > Eve Fetchez la vache !
Sniper Wolf18 Gallente Apocalypse Ponies H E L I C O N	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:53:00 - [14] Was boot.ini an STD?
Gone'Postal Minmatar Rage of Inferno	Posted - 2008.11.07 17:59:00 - [15] Originally by: Sniper Wolf18 Was boot.ini an STD? More like CCPs the ex-wife, who screwed you over, and you didn't know anything about it until a reboot of your system. Boost SISI VOTE NOW!
Sheriff Jones Amarr Clinical Experiment	Posted - 2008.11.07 18:01:00 - [16] Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 07/11/2008 18:03:38 Originally by: ramification Originally by: RedSplat Eve change for dummies: FOTM -> Nerf -> New FOTM -> Nerf Or maybe i'm the dummy Darwin was a dummy too, what with his "Species -> Death -> Better adapted Species -> Death" horse**. What did that beardy tosser think he was on about, anyway? It's so misquoted, actually the bearded pervert said: "Survival of the ***", which means that in any argument, treacherous situation or confrontation, a female whippig out some *** wins by default. Originally by:** Sniper Wolf18 Was boot.ini an STD? Actually boot.ini is the girl you think you've got RIGHT where you want her, then og for a little "patch" in the toilet and find out she's mysteriously gone. All because you clicked on the wrong button My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit.
Soporo Caldari	Posted - 2008.11.07 18:17:00 - [17] If EVE is sex then we just all got the clap. Blasters got the big A and Caldari are beaten to within an inch of life shoved into a gimp suit and chained in the basement.
Dez Affinity Evocati.	Posted - 2008.11.07 18:23:00 - [18] In that case; My old girlfriend was Elisha Cutherbert and my new one is Rosie O'Donnel. _______________
5pinDizzy Amarr Umpteenth Podding	Posted - 2008.11.07 18:40:00 - [19] Edited by: 5pinDizzy on 07/11/2008 18:43:24 wtf, wrong thread, :( May aswell put something useful here now. Uhhh... sex? Lots of eve ships look phallic doncha know... yus! Carry on!
Valrandir Gallente	Posted - 2008.11.07 18:50:00 - [20] I'm Valrandir and I approve of this thread. This has surpassed the Yarrdware specification and has been dubbed Uberware.
Sopha Serpentia Core Dynamics	Posted - 2008.11.07 19:05:00 - [21] Originally by: Roxanna Kell Edited by: Roxanna Kell on 07/11/2008 12:39:38 So there you go, Quantum is the newst b***h on the block, and she is skinny, with freckles and a thing for miners. she likes it kinky, so have a different kind of fun dressed up in uniforms with ribbons and medals on it. I too am dissappointed by Quantum Patch.
Faife Noctiscion	Posted - 2008.11.07 19:28:00 - [22] I too am disappointed in the Castor Patch. -- Your signature is too large. Please resize it to a maximum of 400 x 120 with the file size not exceeding 24000 bytes. If you would like further details please mail [email protected] - Mitnal
Lysianna Celestial Janissaries Curatores Veritatis Alliance	Posted - 2008.11.07 20:34:00 - [23] How about you all stop being spoiled nerds and accept the expansion knowing that it's not the last. It's a free mini expansion, how much more could you ask for? ________________________________________________ Lysianna Hazumason Celestial Janissaries Curatores Veritatis Alliance
Quazal Atreides Gallente Indictus Commeatus	Posted - 2008.11.07 21:25:00 - [24] thing is, if eve is like the sex no f***ing wonder i keep dying quickly [/url]
brakespear Minmatar Heaven Up Here	Posted - 2008.11.07 22:19:00 - [25] Originally by: Quazal Atreides thing is, if eve is like the sex no f***ing wonder i keep dying quickly If only sex had lag .....mind you, I'm not sure how Fleet Battles would translate -------------------------------------------------- 'people will always be tempted to wipe their feet on anything with 'welcome' written on it.'
Dorah Hawkwing Armada.	Posted - 2008.11.08 00:22:00 - [26] Originally by: brakespear Originally by: Quazal Atreides thing is, if eve is like the sex no f*ing wonder i keep dying quickly If only sex had lag .....mind you, I'm not sure how Fleet Battles would translate cluster**?
Allen Ramses Caldari Typo Corp	Posted - 2008.11.08 00:29:00 - [27] Originally by: Dorah Hawkwing Originally by: brakespear Originally by: Quazal Atreides thing is, if eve is like the sex no f*ing wonder i keep dying quickly If only sex had lag .....mind you, I'm not sure how Fleet Battles would translate cluster**? Win +1. ____________________ Pimped out Raven to run level 4 missions quickly: 210 Mil ISK. Realizing your 120 Mil ISK Drake gets the job done faster: Priceless.
Sheriff Jones Amarr Clinical Experiment	Posted - 2008.11.08 00:34:00 - [28] Originally by: brakespear Originally by: Quazal Atreides thing is, if eve is like the sex no f**ing wonder i keep dying quickly If only sex had lag .....mind you, I'm not sure how Fleet Battles would translate Well, if you look at it from a female perspective: I jumped in and next thing i know, it was over. What the hell?! My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit.*
MotherMoon Huang Yinglong	Posted - 2008.11.08 01:10:00 - [29] Originally by: Sheriff Jones Patching EVE is like making love to a beautiful woman;
Discrodia Gallente Independent Miners Guild	Posted - 2008.11.08 01:23:00 - [30] This thread feels so revevant given I dumped my girlfriend today.... EVE is like being a hooker, while your best client stole your drugs and wants sex to get it back. That's how addicted I feel after 20 days. _______________ I mine rocks. Big rocks. :D

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