Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 [6] 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 .. 25 :: one page |
|
Author |
Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 8 post(s) |
Sheriff Jones
Amarr Clinical Experiment
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 19:16:00 -
[151]
(A little interlude)
Eris: Navigator! NAVIGATORR!!! Wrangler: What's up Eris? Eris: Have you seen that damn NAvigator anywhere? Wrangler: Nope, can't say i have. Eris: I'm gonna kill that guy.... Wrangler enters office, looks below his desk; "You gonna go lock some threads soon?" Navigaotr plays with gameboy; "Nope. Let 'em rant. I'll clean it when the servers come up."
End! |
Sergeant Spot
Black Eclipse Corp Band of Brothers
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 19:30:00 -
[152]
Originally by: Sheriff Jones (A little interlude)
Eris: Navigator! NAVIGATORR!!! Wrangler: What's up Eris? Eris: Have you seen that damn NAvigator anywhere? Wrangler: Nope, can't say i have. Eris: I'm gonna kill that guy.... Wrangler enters office, looks below his desk; "You gonna go lock some threads soon?" Navigaotr plays with gameboy; "Nope. Let 'em rant. I'll clean it when the servers come up."
End!
lol, I opened this thread specificly to ask if you could do one about all the "server is not up" whines, and it was already here.....
Play nice while you butcher each other.
|
Veryez
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 19:44:00 -
[153]
made my day, thanks
|
AlienHand
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:05:00 -
[154]
Crying while ROTFL !!!
Damn good thread Sheriff. Kudos!
|
ForceM
Gallente POS Builder Inc. Silent Requiem
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:44:00 -
[155]
Sorry Sheriff .. my little try here :)
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello there and we.. o hi Explorer Explorer: Hi Wrangler: Aren't you support to be working on the patch? Explorer: Uhm ... thats today? *runs*
*ding ding*
-----
|
Sheriff Jones
Amarr Clinical Experiment
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:49:00 -
[156]
Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 02/09/2008 20:50:00 I do take requests you know
And also isk to speed that request up the chain *cough*
But, since you already did done grab a topic from my list, lemme Jonesy it to "as should":
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello there and we...Explorer? Explorer: Hi. Wrangler: What are you doing here? Explorer: Exploring. Wrangler: Shouldn't you be... Explorer: Yup. Wrangler: And you're just... Explorer: Yup. Wrangler: You here for the... Explorer: Mhm. Wrangler: Here ya go, been good talking to ya. Explorer: Sure.
*ding ding* |
ForceM
Gallente POS Builder Inc. Silent Requiem
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:54:00 -
[157]
Originally by: Sheriff Jones Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 02/09/2008 20:50:00 I do take requests you know
And also isk to speed that request up the chain *cough*
But, since you already did done grab a topic from my list, lemme Jonesy it to "as should":
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello there and we...Explorer? Explorer: Hi. Wrangler: What are you doing here? Explorer: Exploring. Wrangler: Shouldn't you be... Explorer: Yup. Wrangler: And you're just... Explorer: Yup. Wrangler: You here for the... Explorer: Mhm. Wrangler: Here ya go, been good talking to ya. Explorer: Sure.
*ding ding*
gha .. i give up .. you rule :) |
RagnhildR tu
Caldari Rognvald Corporation
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:56:00 -
[158]
For crying out loud will someone please sticky this, it's just too good too be lost in the clutter |
|
CCP Navigator
C C P
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:57:00 -
[159]
Originally by: Sheriff Jones (A little interlude)
Eris: Navigator! NAVIGATORR!!! Wrangler: What's up Eris? Eris: Have you seen that damn NAvigator anywhere? Wrangler: Nope, can't say i have. Eris: I'm gonna kill that guy.... Wrangler enters office, looks below his desk; "You gonna go lock some threads soon?" Navigaotr plays with gameboy; "Nope. Let 'em rant. I'll clean it when the servers come up."
End!
If only, man, if only. |
|
Raimo
Gallente Federal Defence Union
|
Posted - 2008.09.02 20:57:00 -
[160]
Hilarious Stuff, Jones! Thanks for all the laughs.
...And keep it up, please! ;) |
|
Kazang
Gallente KnightRaven Alliance
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 04:28:00 -
[161]
Originally by: Sheriff Jones
HT shoots Troll 3 in the face with a gun. Ofcourse. T1 and T2 cheer. Young trolls nose drips().
This is awesome stuff, but you have to tell me what the reference is there, its so familiar, on the tip of my proverbial tongue. My brain is melting trying to remember it. Its driving me mad, I MUST KNOW! This whole thread is reminding me of terry prachett and monty python, especially the tacyhon rat one
|
Sheriff Jones
Amarr Clinical Experiment
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 07:46:00 -
[162]
Originally by: Kazang
Originally by: Sheriff Jones
HT shoots Troll 3 in the face with a gun. Ofcourse. T1 and T2 cheer. Young trolls nose drips().
This is awesome stuff, but you have to tell me what the reference is there, its so familiar, on the tip of my proverbial tongue. My brain is melting trying to remember it. Its driving me mad, I MUST KNOW! This whole thread is reminding me of terry prachett and monty python, especially the tacyhon rat one
It's an old joke i believe, might be from Stargate, Jafa jokes and all. Not quite sure, it's buried deep into my brain
I draw inspiration from plenty of places, monty python, terry pratchet, dougie adams, neil gaiman(even if not that "funny"), eddie izzard routines, etc etc. It's a very complex and weird brain in here.
I'm just glad people like 'em and as long as people listen, stories must be told (all hail anansi )
Wow...deep...normal discussion...blasphemy!
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello there and welcome to the CCP! How can i help you? Customer: Erhm..yes..err...i'm a player and i've been hunting those durn blasted angels for ages. Yes. Wrangler: Ah, ratting your cup of tea? Customer: Who you calling a rat?! I mean..err...yes. Wrangler: Riight..well. how can i help you? Customer: Those angel rats shoot very much explosive things at you and, well, i heard of these "resistance platings" you could fit on ships. Wrangler: Right, right. Basic resistance plating, active, uses little capacitor, give a nice boost to resistances on your ships armor. Customer: Splendid! Do you have them in explosive? Wrangler: We have them in all shapes and sizes good sir. Customer: I'd need some explosive, and to be sure, some kinetic, thermal and EM too. Wrangler: Right-o, and which type? Customer: Type? Wrangler: You want tech 1 or tech 2 or...? Customer: Tech 2? Wrangler: Yeah, you know, better then standard equipment you find? Customer: Ooh yes! This tech 2 sounds very nice. Wrangler: Alrighty. And how many? Customer: Hmm? Wrangler: How many would you need? Gees... Customer: Oh. Well, let's see...*counts fingers*...37.000. Wrangler: Excuse me? Did you say 37 THOUSAND? Customer: Each. Wrangler: Right...look...you're not palnning on anything naughty are you? We dno't stand for players doing naughty things. Customer: Not at all. I swear on my...pod...that no player shall be doing no naughty with these *nods firmly* Wrangler: Right. Well. The shipment will be ready in a day or so, where should these be sent? Customer: Angel Cartel. Wrangler: Excuse me?! Customer: Oh..er...kidding kidding! Haha, i made a joke you see? Wrangler: Grr...where do you want them? Customer: We'll send a ship to get them. Wrangler: Right. Here's your receipt and have a nice day. Customer: Oh i will! Bye!!
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Bunch of weirdos...
My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit. |
Thin Glass
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 09:08:00 -
[163]
Jaffa joke...
A Serpent guard, a Horus guard and a Setesh guard meet on a neutral planet. It is a tense moment. The Serpent guard's eyes glow. The Horus guard's beak glistens. The Setesh guard's nose... drips. |
Sheriff Jones
Amarr Clinical Experiment
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 11:22:00 -
[164]
Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 03/09/2008 11:23:37 (Roy Batty68, jsut for you )
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello there and welcome to the CCP! How can i help you? Customer: Nerf suiciders! Wrangler: No..sod off. Customer: Nerf suiciders! Wrangler: I said no! Customer: err...nerf nano? Wrangler: Why? *suspiciously* Customer: Fast things hurt my head? Wrangler: Oh shut up... Customer: Ok ok, nerf...no no...CHANGE...concord response time! Wrangler: Because? Customer: Err....realism? Wrangler: Nothing to do with suiciders? Customer: Nope. Wrangler: I don't believe you. Sod. Off. Customer: Oh come on, nerf suiciders! Wrangler: NO! Customer: Please?! Wrangler: N and an O. Customer: Niu? Wrangler: NO! Customer: Fine. Wrangler: Anything else? Customer: Well, i guess not...no wait..err...how about, remove insurance from concorded ships? Wrangler: Sounds awfully lot like a suicider nerf. Customer: It's not, honest, it's a market balance. Isk sink. Err...*puts thumbs up* Wrangler: Fine, i'll remove it. Customer: Yei!!
*ding ding*
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello and ...oh it's you. Customer: My ship just blew up. Wrangler: And? Customer: In highsec. Wrangler: ...and? Customer: i didn't get any insurance. Wrangler: Someone killed you? Customer: Technically. Wrangler: Define please. customer: I activated my smart bombs and the nearby ship dared invade my area of..err....lightshow. Wrangler: You suicided someone and didn't get insurance. Customer: To put it blunt. Wrangler: You just asked me to remove the insurance! Customer: Well not frmo MY ships. Wrangler: ... Customer: I should leave? Wrangler nods, slowly.
*ding ding*
My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit. |
Moneeh
Minmatar Pator Tech School
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 12:15:00 -
[165]
I'd send you a pack of cookies Sheriff but i always end up eating them myself :(
Anywayz, great stuff!
|
Bloody McStrange
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 12:32:00 -
[166]
Originally by: Sheriff Jones Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 03/09/2008 11:23:37 (Roy Batty68, jsut for you )
*ding ding*
<3
|
Roy Batty68
Caldari Immortal Dead
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 12:33:00 -
[167]
Originally by: Bloody McStrange
Originally by: Sheriff Jones Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 03/09/2008 11:23:37 (Roy Batty68, jsut for you )
*ding ding*
<3
Stupid alt ><
Sig removed, inappropriate content. If you would like further details please mail [email protected] ~Saint |
Dantes Revenge
Caldari
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 13:00:00 -
[168]
This is the best laugh I've had for a long time.
Don't mean to steal you thunder Sheriff but someone has to stick up for poor Wrangler.
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello there and welcome to the CCP! How can i.. Oh, it's you Sheriff Jones. Sheriff Jones: I've come to find out why I only have 2K skill points now. Wrangler: You made me look a complete fool on the public forums. Sheriff Jones: Aww, come on, it was just a few jokes. Wrangler: So I jokingly removed a few skill points. Sheriff Jones: But I was just joking, can't you take a joke at your expense? Wrangler: Pot... kettle... black. Sheriff Jones: Mumble... mumble...
*ding ding*
Eris: You know Oveur will go nuts if you don't re-instate those skill points. Wrangler: Yea but I'll let Jonesy stew for a while first.
-- There's a simple difference between kinky and perverted. Kinky is using a feather to get her in the mood. Perverted is using the whole chicken. |
Chillshock
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 19:26:00 -
[169]
You Jones represent the general tone of the forums more than the csm. XD
sry, dudes.
|
Sydonis
Caldari Xoth Inc
|
Posted - 2008.09.03 21:16:00 -
[170]
Still excellent, Jones... :)
1 free bump so people can find it more easily... :)
Keep them coming.
|
|
Roshan longshot
Gallente Ordos Humanitas
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 03:24:00 -
[171]
Thanks alot Jones....I should have been asleep already...here it is 11:30pm and I have to get up at 4:30am...its going to be along day...... Damn you CCP! Why did you have to make such a good game?? Yes you drew me back AGAIN! Oh well wheres the Omber? |
Cay Qel'Droma
Amarr RONA Corporation RONA Alliance
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 04:54:00 -
[172]
Sheriff, you made my workday 100% better again _
Amateurs built the Arc, professionals built the Titanic. |
Sheriff Jones
Amarr Clinical Experiment
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 08:48:00 -
[173]
Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 04/09/2008 08:49:25
Originally by: Roshan longshot Thanks alot Jones....I should have been asleep already...here it is 11:30pm and I have to get up at 4:30am...its going to be along day......
I do my best to ruin everyone elses workday while i stay up and think of things
Dantes, excellent snipe, but you do know what this means
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Hello thre and welcome to the CCP! How can i help you? Dantes Revenge: I'd like to buy some stuff for my gallivanting ways. Wrangler: Certainly, what'll it be? Dantes Revenge: Some missiles for start. Wrangler: Rockets, standard...? Dantes Revenge: Heavy missiles. Wrangler: Right, and kinetic, explosive...? Dantes Revenge: Kinetic thank you. Wrangler: Kinetic heavy missiles. Right. Dantes Revenge: Assault. Wrangler: Hmm? Dantes Revenge: Heavy assault missiles. Wrangler: Right. Kinetic heavy assault missiles, got it *goes to back room* Dantes Revenge: Faction! Wrangler peeks back: 'xcuse me? Dantes Revenge: I'd like it to be faction. Wrangler: So, faction kinetic heavy assault missiles. Dantes Revenge: Right. Wrangler: That it? Dantes Revenge: Yup. Wrangler: Ok, be right back..*disappears into the backroom* *rummaging noises* *more rummaging noises* *muffled curses* Wrangler brings out a missile and slams it on table; Right, how many? Dantes Revenge: Oh oh oh! Wrangler: What?! Dantes Revenge: T2? Wrangler: .... Dantes Revenge: Could i have them in T2? Wrangler: T2 Faction kinetic heavy assault missiles? Dantes Revenge: Yup, that's it. Wrangler: Look, there's no T2 faction missiles. There's faction, there' T2, there's no Faction T2. Dantes Revenge: Oh. I don't want any then. Wrangler: ...what? Dantes Revenge: If they ain't t2 i don't want any. Wrangler: Well we DO have some T2 kinetic heavy assault missiles back there. Dantes Revenge: No, i don't want missiles anymore. You put me off them. Wrangler: I...right. Anything else? Dantes Revenge: Crystals? Wrangler: Size? Dantes Revenge: Medium. Wrangler: Frequency? Dantes Revenge: 99.5 khz. Wrangler: ... Dantes Revenge: 96.3? Wrangler: No. We don't have any. Dantes Revenge: Oh...i thought i saw some Wrangler: Nope. Those are windows. Dantes Revenge: Right...well...launchers? Wrangler sighs; Kind? Dantes Revenge: Snowball? Wrangler: No! Dantes Revenge: Homeless? Wrangler: NO!!! Dantes Revenge: Rocket? Wrangler: Yes! Now, t1, t2, faction? No t2 faction! Dantes Revenge: Pocket? Wrangler: Pocket..rocket...launcher? Dantes Revenge: Yes. Wrangler: Right, i'm gonna count to five and... Dantes Revenge: Bye!
*ding ding*
My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit. |
Neqa'el Uphir
Aurora Logistics
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 10:13:00 -
[174]
awesome stuff. can u make some more with wow?
|
Kash Ka
Amarr Point of No Return
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 10:22:00 -
[175]
Originally by: Neqa'el Uphir awesome stuff. can u make some more with wow?
If u want wow jokes go play wow. --------------==============================-------------- Forgiveness is between you and god, im just here to arrange the meeting. |
Neqa'el Uphir
Aurora Logistics
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 10:26:00 -
[176]
Originally by: Kash Ka
Originally by: Neqa'el Uphir awesome stuff. can u make some more with wow?
If u want wow jokes go play wow.
Why not jokes with ppl who are compare eve with wow or ppl who tell to other ppl "Go play wow" ;)
|
Nofonno
Amarr Exploratio et Industria Morispatia
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 11:31:00 -
[177]
Very good material, got me plenty of laughs.
If I may get a request, I'm craving something along the lines of "Romanes eunt domus"
---
A scientist must be an optimist at heart - to have the strength to rally against a chorus of voices saying "it cannot be done". |
Dantes Revenge
Caldari
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 15:41:00 -
[178]
ROFLMAO nice comeback Sheriff. -- There's a simple difference between kinky and perverted. Kinky is using a feather to get her in the mood. Perverted is using the whole chicken. |
JamnOne
Amarr
|
Posted - 2008.09.04 16:29:00 -
[179]
You know Sheriff, I am probably going to lose my job since I make it a point to come here and read this thread everyday when I get to work.
Ah screw it...gimme more more more!!!
________________ Poor is the nation that has no heroes. Shameful is the one that, having heroes - Forgets them!
Author Unknown
|
Sheriff Jones
Amarr Clinical Experiment
|
Posted - 2008.09.05 07:20:00 -
[180]
Edited by: Sheriff Jones on 05/09/2008 07:21:06 *thud*
Wrangler: Oww...
*clickety*
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Ngh... Wrangler walks over to the front desk, puts coffee on table and sits down. Wrangler proceeds to slam head on table.
*ding ding*
Wrangler: Mhmmh mhm mhm mmmhm mhmhhm! Hmhmhmmh mhm? Customer: Shouuld i come back later? Wrangler: No, no, i'm fine. Honeszzz...honest! Customer: You look, tired. Wrangler: Well...meh...no good comeback...*drinks coffee* Customer: Mind if i complain? Wrangler: Go right *yawn* ahead. Customer: Well i believe that the new Wranglers head nods. Customer: Ahehem! Wrangler: Whahuhz*snort* Hello there and welcome to the CCP! How c Customer: Look i'll come back when you're awake. Wrangler: I'm awake i'm awake! *blinks* Customer: Right, well, in short i need a better gun. Wrangler: What's wrong with the *yawn*... the old gun? Customer: It doesn't hit hard enough. Wrangler: Fit two. Customer: No, even with 8 fitted, i can't damage other ships well enough. Wrangler: You Amarr? Customer: No, minmatar. Wrangler: Ah then it IS a problem. *looks at camera* Customer: Could you help? Wrangler: Sure, minmatar *stretches* you say? Customer: Yup. Wrangler: Certainly sir. *slams a roll of ducttape on table* Customer: Err... Wrangler: Tie two together, fit in slot, double firepower. *yawns* Buuhbye now. *leans his head against his arms on table* Customer: But...you sure that works? Wrangler: Zzzzz..... Customer: Right...err...bye?
*ding ding*
My opinions represent the opinions of my corporation completely. I'm the CEO damnit. |
|
|
|
|
Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 [6] 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 .. 25 :: one page |
First page | Previous page | Next page | Last page |