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Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.23 18:45:00 - [1] If you are a pirate and have a funny story please post it. With all the pirate bashing going on we all could use a good laugh. I'll start: We were on our way to a jump gate when one of our members came under attack from a playerA in a cruiser. Our member managed to warp away and we waited at a gate for him to catch up. As luck would have it. playerA just happened to be headed in my direction so we began with the standard procedure. Warp lock, stasis ect. Well this slippery eel managed to make it to the jump gate just before I finished him off. He was also kind enough to leave us with some parting words. "hahahahahaha" I believe was his exact words. We didn't bother to pursue and waited for the others to catch up. We then headed to our destination and setup the typical Gate trap. Not 10 minutes has gone by when, you guessed it, playerA warps in and is headed for our gate. Needless to say he wasn't laughing this time from the inside of his egg. I felt it necessary to leave him a message as well. Mine said. "He who laughs last, laughs best". Ok who is next?
la'Rei	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:08:00 - [2] I was setting at a gate, Doing my normal thing "I'm a solo pirate, and I can kill you." Well I was in my maller, and this dude was in a blackbird. Well I was like "STOP YOUR SHIP" no responce, and he didnt start slowing down, so I threw stasis and warp jammer on him. and repeated "STOP YOUR SHIP NOW!!!" He still kept truckin along at 30m/s. So, I opend fire and blew up his blackbird! (he shoulda paid me the 50k I wanted, woulda been cheaper than buying a new blackbird) But nooo, when he was in his pod, he sat there. just sat by his cargo canister and was like "YOU IDIOT". Little did he know, I dont like being called a idiot. I locked him, put a jammer on him, and podded him. Then he called me stupid agian. If I'm not mistaken, I took time with this case for him to not die, yet he ended up podded. Moral of the story: if there's pirates at a gate, and you cant kill them, they CAN kill you. Give them what they want, and your likely to live. _________________________ Trolling is bad. Please dont do it. -rei
Molly	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:08:00 - [3] I'm not a pirate myself, but some think I am: "Molly > yes? Diego > Isn't it a bit dangerous to drive an indy when you are wanted? Molly > sigh" . . . "Tifany Fingers > hello Molly > hello :-). Molly > can i help u? Tifany Fingers > just asking for safe passage Molly > ah. well. i am not a pirate myself :). Molly > so no worries. Tifany Fingers > thanks trying to get my new ship and have 10 more jups to go Molly > good luck :-). Tifany Fingers > thanks.. then I need to get my sec acct out here for equiping it Molly > i guess i need a new sec rating, do not want to threat people. Molly > good bye tifany." I hope it's somehow funny for at least one of the readers for me it was :-). Edited by: Molly on 23/06/2003 19:09:40 --- "Molly > funny thing is, if they warn me for attacking in 1.0, why does a GM wish me luck doing so? Jash Illian > perverse sense of humor? Molly > lol Jash Illian > honestly tho, because he prolly doesn't know bships"
Hampsta	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:30:00 - [4] Saturday we were hanging around a gate, ya know, making friends and getting to know the locals when a nice shiny stabber warped in. He was warp locked and hit with stasis. Since had no cash and nothing in his ship, we asked the pilot to eject from his ship and fly home to bring us payment. He actually ejected from ship and it was then quite humorous trying to figure out how to dock his cruiser. He returned in 15 - 20 minutes with payment of 800K in Isogen and we returned his ship to him unharmed. moral to the story: If he hadn't paid, he'd have been out 4.5 mil + for a new ship and mods vs. the 800K he spent to save it. Edited by: Hampsta on 23/06/2003 19:34:09
Darkannis	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:41:00 - [5] Havent seen a funny one yet - this is just PR verbiage.
Molly	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:42:00 - [6] Then post one or simply shut up :-). --- "Molly > funny thing is, if they warn me for attacking in 1.0, why does a GM wish me luck doing so? Jash Illian > perverse sense of humor? Molly > lol Jash Illian > honestly tho, because he prolly doesn't know bships"
Darkannis	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:56:00 - [7] Molly - I'm not a pirate. Though a funny story would be about the "Pirates" trying to dress up PR as "funny stories" and expecting people to go "Ho ho ho! You are all very amusing chaps and chapesses. I wish I could stroke my ego as often and as well as you all do in the telling of stories where we encourage you to act like sheep." Actually - You're right... this IS an hilarious thread. Here's another funny story: A pirate tried to stop me at a gate. I let him webify me and scramble me then blew his ship to ribbons and podded him. He came after me with his two friends the next week. I killed them and podded them also. He now plays a miner and flies an imicus.,, but wait.. I killed him also! And he went and whinged on the forums about it! Now THAT's funny.
Molly	Posted - 2003.06.23 19:58:00 - [8] Rofl. --- "Molly > funny thing is, if they warn me for attacking in 1.0, why does a GM wish me luck doing so? Jash Illian > perverse sense of humor? Molly > lol Jash Illian > honestly tho, because he prolly doesn't know bships"
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:02:00 - [9] Since you are in fact not a pirate, please don't post, troll, and/or flame. If you want you can start your own thread of funny stories by non-pirates. I'm sure there are a few. For instance the classic "I used a missile too close to my buddies and got destroyed by Concord" or "I went afk for 10 min while on autopilot and found myself podded and floating in space.
la'Rei	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:03:00 - [10] har har, see, mOo has some funny stories, I think one of htem has a GM's corpse! I think that's funny in it's own!! There is the time I was in my bestower in a .5 zone (as high as I can go) and some idiot in a cruiser thought it would be funny to blow up the pirate in a indy... The poor indy got to loot the cruiser BTW. _________________________ Trolling is bad. Please dont do it. -rei
Viceroy	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:03:00 - [11] hahaha Edited by: Viceroy on 23/06/2003 20:04:30 -
Darkannis	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:11:00 - [12] Is that how you lost your bounty Crep? Or didnt you ever warrant one? "I call myself a pirate but i dont even have a bounty on my head". Sure sign of a rampant and prolific killer... either that or methinks somebody got podded. Want to tell us which one? - c'mon it's a thread of Pirate "funnies" after all. Don't be shy now.
Kayosoni	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:18:00 - [13] Red Corsairs huh? It's a damn shame I have no screenshot of us blowing up Padan's Stabber... http://www.siegedom.org/Files/images/EveRedonKill.jpg And after that you guys quickly decided to become cowards and hide in the station. Rather boring if you ask me... Edited by: Kayosoni on 23/06/2003 20:21:19 ----------------------------------- Currently Playing Lineage 2 - Erica Server
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:21:00 - [14] <sigh> See what pirates must endure. Constant harassment from disgruntled players. If you must know my bounty was collected by one "TheBigDog" It wasn't much of a fight being I was ill-equipped and by a station at the time. You see stations don't protect pirates but will fire on them if they are attacking. I get the impression that you think I would some how be embarrassed that someone collected a bounty on me. Quite the contrary. I congratulated him and if you asked him he'd probably say I made his day. To think that you cannot be beaten is very ignorant. Thank you for Hijacking this thread and turning it into yet another "I hate pirates" Go join Sour Grapes Corp. They are the fastest growing corp in the game.
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:27:00 - [15] Yes Kayosoni, We were beaten that day without a doubt. However it was a rifter and not a stabber and Padan is no longer a member of Red Corsairs. We look forward to our next meeting. We always enjoy a challenge. As far as hiding in the station goes. I would have continued the fight but my pod isn't very well equiped for combat. Edited by: Crepiscule on 23/06/2003 20:30:34
Kayosoni	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:37:00 - [16] Thank you crep, I THOUGHT Padan only had a frigate (but my corpmates said stabber...) I admit I was disappointed to not fight any cruisers that day. :) ----------------------------------- Currently Playing Lineage 2 - Erica Server
Setec	Posted - 2003.06.23 20:58:00 - [17] Setec > Hi, I'm a pirate. Setec > BOO! Setec > Hope that was scary. Setec > You're free to go now. Noobship Pilot > yes very! thank you! Setec > Hi, I'm a pirate. DO NOT fire on me, DO NOT try to run away, turn off autopilot, bring your ship to a complete stop and await my next message. You will NOT lose your ship if you cooperate, but if you try to escape or fight back I'll destroy it immediately. Funny-threat-boy > yea? Setec > Ok, good. Funny-threat-boy > ? Funny-threat-boy > what do u want? Setec > Your cargo. Funny-threat-boy > what of it? Setec > All of it. Setec > Ok thank you, wise move, you are free to go. Setec > Jams are deactivated, you can move normally in a few seconds. Funny-threat-boy > btw j0rt in m0o is on ur ass White trash #$%^ Setec > Hi Victim's CEO > hello Victim's CEO > I have heard that you have attacked one of my corp convoys earlier today Victim's CEO > is there a reason for this umprovoked attack? Setec > Well, it was provoked... they came near me with stuff worth money! Setec > I'm a pirate. Not denying it. :) Victim's CEO > Do you speak for your corp? Victim's CEO > =-) Setec > Yeah, I'm the CEO. Victim's CEO > sounds good Victim's CEO > sometimes i wish i were a pirate Setec > STOP YUOR SHIP. Unwise Trader > Please no Setec > I will stop my guns. Setec > Stop your ship. Unwise Trader > wait new Setec > I see you're carrying robotics. Unwise Trader > I'm still new Unwise Trader > Not exactly I think. I'm carrying silicon Setec > Everyone says that and tries to get off easy. Unwise Trader > It's true honest. playing 3 days Unwise Trader > Everything I have is on this ship Setec > You got a bestower in 3 days? Living on corp money? Setec > I think I can let you live for 500k isk. Unwise Trader > Mining 360k for a bestower Unwise Trader > I don't have it. I have 14k and change Setec > That could be bad news for you. Unwise Trader > That is your choice, but I tell you, if you kill me I stop playing this game today Setec > Ask your corpmates for 500k or withdraw it from the corp account. Unwise Trader > This is all I have and i am not starting from scratch again Setec > I'm a pirate. This is what I do. Unwise Trader > I'm new to the guild, and its a new guild plus the officers are not on Unwise Trader > I understand that, but trading is what I do Unwise Trader > Not harming anyone, just trying to get started in the game Setec > How much silicon are you carrying? Unwise Trader > All my money in silicon, which is not a lot Setec > Yeah, EVERYONE including the filthy rich robotics traders claims to be a newbie with 20k in the bank. I find it hard to believe. Setec > How many units? Unwise Trader > Sorry, but it's true Setec > Yeah, everyone says that. Setec > How many units of silicon? Unwise Trader > Nothing I can say will change what you think, but truth it is Unwise Trader > I'm leaving the game now. Stuff this Unwise Trader > kill me if you like, I'm going gback to daoc Setec > Pay me in cargo I guess. How many units of silicon do you have? Unwise Trader > But let me live Unwise Trader > and another time Setec > LOL ouch now there's a threat... DAOC is wicked. Unwise Trader > you will get your money Setec > what a crappy game Unwise Trader > hehe was fun for a while Unwise Trader > but 6 months and I was ready for something new Setec > I'm going to let you live if you drop your cargo. Setec > Not all of it, just half. Unwise Trader > No. That's all I have Unwise Trader > I know it's all with you Setec > And I'm taking half of it or all of it. Unwise Trader > But I will not do that Setec > Do you want me to blow you up? Unwise Trader > I worked for 2 days Unwise Trader > to get this cargo Unwise Trader > It's all I ahve Setec > Yeah, I'm a cold-hearted bastard. Setec > You've got a choice. Give me half of it, or lose all of it AND your ship. Unwise Trader > I'll give you 1k of my silcon. That's a lot of silicon Setec > make it 2k Unwise Trader > But that will take me hours to get back Unwise Trader > but okay Unwise Trader > I'm not doing this any more Setec > in time it won't seem like much to you Unwise Trader > another person on myu tail Unwise Trader > help Setec > yeah, he's my industrial friend Setec > he's just helping speed jam you, he won't fire Setec > he's here to pick up the silicon Unwise Trader > okay. If this happens again then goodbye to this game Setec > jettison 2000 silicon now Unwise Trader > this is not fun Unwise Trader > How do I do that? Setec > yeah it's the unpleasant part of the game Setec > open your ship's cargo hold Setec > shift+click on the stack of silicon and drag it to an empty part of your cargo hold, it'll let you type an amount Unwise Trader > Games should not be unpleasant. Setec > enter 2000 Setec > then right-click that stack to 2000 and select jettison Unwise Trader > Nope. I'm leaving the game. Stuff this. Bullying, no matt ___________________________________________ Space Invaders website: http://www.si-corp.net
Kayosoni	Posted - 2003.06.23 21:11:00 - [18] It's almost painful to read that... ----------------------------------- Currently Playing Lineage 2 - Erica Server
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.23 21:14:00 - [19] Here is another where no one was hurt. It happened back when getting stuck while zoning was very common. I logged on a second character and petitioned a GM to move me to my previous system. An hour goes by and I get a reply that my character has been moved. So I logged my character on and I'm in a station. Not the station I had asked to be moved to but one 21 jumps away in a 0.0 sec space. I was a bit miffed at the GM for that but I sucked it up and was going to make the long trip back through 0.0 sec system after 0.0 sec system. Then I noticed that someone had entered the station. Since I was in low sec space I thought it might be prudent to look at his info. Low and behold it was a member of M0o. Sorry I don't remember who exactly it was at the time. Well this made things go from bad to worse. I waited a bit to see if they were going to leave anytime soon. They didn't so I made the decision to see if I could make it out around them. (btw I had just picked up a shiny new Vigil. So new in fact it still had that new ship smell to it.) I exit out of the station and immediately warp to the nearest planet, then bounce from asteroid belt to planet in a zig zag fashion making my way to the gate. I make my final approach and notice that it is camped by a cruiser. I didn't see any cargo containers sorry to say, and I didn't wait for him to roll out the red carpet for me and I warped to a safe area. Well it seems that this system only had one jump gate out and I wasn't about to be a hero or put any laser marks on my new ship. So after refusing to pay to leave I camped, logged on that alternate character and asked the GM to kindly put me where I had requested instead of the dead end system with the most notorious pirates in the game.
The Wretch	Posted - 2003.06.23 21:50:00 - [20] Setec has the best chats so far. The Wretch Cyberdyne Systems CEO
Main	Posted - 2003.06.23 22:01:00 - [21] setec is a cold, hard, little crap, setec, you are a very good pirate :), keep it up. Main Everlasting Vendetta Veteran Member of the Stain Alliance
nails	Posted - 2003.06.23 22:23:00 - [22] ROFLMAO - "We are pirates, we have come to take your lo0t, jettison everything in your cargo hold or die" -- Pirate's #1 enemy, the n0ob that doesn't know how to jettison his cargo rofl. Edited by: nails on 23/06/2003 22:26:00 Edited by: nails on 23/06/2003 22:26:22 ------------------ http://ota-corps.otaku.jp -- Anime l33t level
Molly	Posted - 2003.06.23 23:18:00 - [23] After podding me in Gehi: Molly > nice try. Molly > i reloged and came back down. Molly > we will deal later. ROFL > I know hehe. --- "Molly > funny thing is, if they warn me for attacking in 1.0, why does a GM wish me luck doing so? Jash Illian > perverse sense of humor? Molly > lol Jash Illian > honestly tho, because he prolly doesn't know bships"
loci	Posted - 2003.06.24 00:02:00 - [24] these replies are like a bevis and buthead episode with the humour removed
Molly	Posted - 2003.06.24 00:55:00 - [25] And who are you? Beavis? --- "Molly > funny thing is, if they warn me for attacking in 1.0, why does a GM wish me luck doing so? Jash Illian > perverse sense of humor? Molly > lol Jash Illian > honestly tho, because he prolly doesn't know bships"
Talur Lokarn	Posted - 2003.06.24 11:14:00 - [26] I'd have to agree. So far I think the only Pirate I want to meet is Setec...all you others have no humour at all. Of course Molly's not a Pirate, but you come in second. Please...surely there must be MORE funny stories out there... awaiting Crepiscule's wrath cause I don't find him funny
Main	Posted - 2003.06.24 11:18:00 - [27] I would love to meet setec. <setec>come to a complete stop and drop all your cargo... <main>hmmmm....i don't know how to drop my cargo, sorry <setec>hey, what are you doing, you're not ment to fire <main>... <setec>nooooo........you...... <setec>you have podded me, i am going to come back and kill you one day main...mark my words hehehehehe ;) Main Everlasting Vendetta Veteran Member of the Stain Alliance
XeQtR	Posted - 2003.06.24 11:47:00 - [28] "Unwise Trader > I'll give you 1k of my silcon. That's a lot of silicon Setec > make it 2k Unwise Trader > But that will take me hours to get back" He actually whined after you've lowered the price to a few hours of work?? I'd be beside myself with joy.
ROFL	Posted - 2003.06.24 12:46:00 - [29] I love you Molly.
Sybylle	Posted - 2003.06.24 12:48:00 - [30] Hmm...Well, I'm not a pirate and I didn't killed anybody ingame (nor in real life :P) All I can tell is that alot of ppl take Eve too seriously...Eve IS and remains a game. Even if I'm not a pirate and I don't want to meet one, the whining guys make me laught alot. They're like ppl complaining about an IT support and thinking they are essentials to the firm. Pirates are part of the game. If you do not want to face them, avoid the places were they are. If a pirate is kind enought to reduce the price, stop whining and pay...If you don't , face consequencies. And if you got enought of loosing all, well become a pirate. Setec made me laught... Russian also (in other posts). Remember that pirate or not they are still players :P (\_/) (O.o) (> <)=Oveur (proof) "Jumping 50 systems I can like, have sex 150 times during that period"
DREAMWORKS	Posted - 2003.06.24 13:39:00 - [31] After reading these pod stories i have to tell you guys it makes me sad that you are able to do such a thing to someone who hasnt done any harm to you. Taking someone's ship he saved for 2 weeks is one thing, but killing his character and having the risk you just end him while he was looking for new clone contract or he was too poor to buy a clone makes me sad and yet angry at the same time. People who pod for no reason are like the kids who never had anything to say in real life and try to get there personal social revenge by ruining someones gameplay for a reasonable time. Yet i wouldnt post here if i didnt had a story to share, so here goes: Yesterday, yes its still fresh, my corp and another corp had a conflict wich wasnt the first that occured in the last 2 weeks. With their 9 members they have shot down and podded a member of my corp twice and they told them it was because they had a contract to clean out the solarsystem from miners. So yesterday, we were mining with about 20 people in a belt. No defence except for some hammerheads, all mining in the 0.5 sector for some lovely nice ores for our new ships we yet had to manufacture. So what happend was this guy jumped in and knew he couldnt attack, since he had 20/1. So he took another path: Taking the ores that lay in containers in space to be picked up by Haulers, actions i call thieving, others call taking items from an unknown owner. As a hothead like myself i realized straight away what this guy was doing and jumped to station to get my nice gunz, i returned and blasted him out of space while his hands were still hot and he let a container implode. With minor armor damage he left the belt while his CEO came in jumping to follow his members act, and take some ore i like to call: "Not yours you &#%&# #%(*#% puppy!" Offcourse i had some bullets left over with his name on it and raged with all fury and pasion into his hull leaving him to jump away. After killing of several concords, i got sick of beeing chased and raised by sec. status a little bit by blasting off about 100 pirates in several belts, while on the chase for concord.. I got sick of this so i jumped away to the station, and docked... 20 minutes later, after eating my favorite icecream chocolate cookie dough, i figured to return to mine. While i undocked i cursed myself for not taking my mine equipement, but then again... Gues who showed up... The mister who started the theft was chased down by concord, few moments before that he tried to pull the same trick to an unknown guy and instead of get shot he shot the frigate of the guy.. Beeing followed by concord he was webified, scrambled all that stuff, and simply a sitting duck. Glad and thanking god i still had my nice shiny "ikillthieves" blasters and within 30 seconds his Maller was well done. In a nice pod hanging next with his cargo, we figured what comes around goes around. And we took 1 MWD, 3 650mm guns and loads other stuff... He ran back to station and tried to pick it up, but 3 km before he could take stuff back the cargo imploded. Losing your Maller and stuff worth around 5 mil is certainly worth stealing those nice ombers! And now im 0.3 sec for "helping" concord, who chased me later... Q_Q __________________________ http://www.nin.com/visuals/thtf_hi.html
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.24 14:28:00 - [32] I'm so glad so many people want to share stories but the idea was for pirates to share the stories, not for people to come and once again turn this into an anti pirate thread. And for those of you who want to meet Setec, you ***** me up. It's like saying you wouldn't mind being mugged if he was polite about it. Hahaha
DREAMWORKS	Posted - 2003.06.24 14:36:00 - [33] What you basicly are saying is dont bash or post hate reactions, as a pirate you should know better that you ARE hated by all in EVE... Dont believe one topic about pirates make your carreer any more romantic, because it simply isnt. Like my mother always says: If you cant stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen (god make her stop watchin soaps.). Anyway, my story is about beeing a pirate.. Concord believes i did a pirate act, the game does... Since i attacked someone who i wasnt (yet) in war with. Also my sec. status dropped from my precious 3.1 to 0.3... Beeing a pirate doesnt mean you are always one, it doesnt mean you are always a lonewolf or in a pirate corp... According to Concord and the game you are a pirate as soon as you attack someone and you caused the first hit. In other words, i am a pirate standing up for my corp. :P __________________________ http://www.nin.com/visuals/thtf_hi.html
Setec	Posted - 2003.06.24 14:44:00 - [34] If anyone would like to skip meeting me and just directly send me isk, they're more than welcome to do so. :) And Main, I've got a pretty good record so far against people who shoot back. One maller I jumped really got my heart racing--I thought I was toast, then I jumped away, and just as I jumped I realized he was out of cap and HE was toast, but since I jumped away he got away. It was a cool fight though and left both of us at about 30% structure. Other than that nobody gave me much difficulty pirating in my Moa. I'm in a bit different ship setup now though. :) Moa got old. ___________________________________________ Space Invaders website: http://www.si-corp.net
loci	Posted - 2003.06.24 14:48:00 - [35] you shame the caldari race...coward
Solysh	Posted - 2003.06.24 15:50:00 - [36] DREAMWORKS, we didn't keep that poor kids Stabber, we simply used it as collateral until he paid up. This game is based around combat, not mining. If you dont want people to attack you, stay out of lowsec.
DREAMWORKS	Posted - 2003.06.24 16:13:00 - [37] I am very aware that people can attack me in low security, as you might read my story once again you might realize i have shown hostile act before in a 0.5 system. Yet i have an opinion, thats same as most, that podkilling for no reason is not only lame. But reta.. youknowwhat. So basicly im saying: Dont pod people, since they did you no harm. If they however try to make fun of you, harass you, dont get it after they lost their ships and keep on cursing you, thief from you, threaten you. I say: Pod them! People just can drive you over the edge and i am very aware of this... I dont know what my future is in this game, i loved shooting someone's ship because he irritated my brains out. But i do know something, i will never shoot at someones pod when theres no reason to it. Any good pirate knows that to get more items in the future, and even better items, you should let your victim live to make a new fortune. You both "win", he gets away in his pod and you get your nice cargo. In other words my message is: Pirates are hunt down for a reason, they shoot down 2 weeks of work in an unreasonable time that mostly takes about 10 seconds. Making a post here doesnt make you more or less heroic. Podding people for fun is showing your true colours, your true capacity of thinking. Showing that your that kind of kid that pulls out the cats hairs after he didnt got his toy. In other words, very immature and hated by many. Edited by: DREAMWORKS on 24/06/2003 16:14:56 __________________________ http://www.nin.com/visuals/thtf_hi.html
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.24 16:33:00 - [38] Two words "Buy Insurance"
Spider Jeru	Posted - 2003.06.24 17:01:00 - [39] Cant help much with a funny story from the pirate's end, as I quit that particular lifestyle in beta. How bout some incompetent pirate stories? Acuna, Merdekka, and Falhofnir have got to be high when they attempt to pirate. Ran into them three seperate times: First time, Merdekka warps into a belt as I'm looting cargo containers. Scrambles me from his max range, so I fire up all four afterburners and start moving away at 900m/s. He's going maybe 300. I figure..this guy has got to be new to this, so I circle back around to blow him out of the water. Falhofnir warps in a full 30 seconds after the time when Merdekka started trying to scramble me, so I get distance and warp to the station. Acuna's there, apparently afk, and no one fires so much as a shot at me. So I figure they're just having a bad day. The next day I'm running down to Torrinos. ON the way back, I find Merdekka at a gate. He scrambles me (again) and can't keep up with my speed (again). I take maybe one shot from Acuna as I try to figure out why Merdekka scrambled but didn't web a guy going toward a gate. /boggle Couple days later, another trip to Torrinos...and who should be camping a gate but the Cthulu threesome again? The problem is they made one strategic error...they're camping a gate with a dependable 7km drop in. WTG! Barely had time to notice thier prescence before autopilot jumped. Make me miss the competence of the m00 guys...
Bonepart	Posted - 2003.06.24 17:29:00 - [40] All I can say is that I hope Setec podded the 'Unwise Trader'. He gives a bad name to all merchants. I'm insulted that this whining baby of a man even refers to himself as a trader! Hopefully if he tried to log off Setec had enough time to do his business :)
Stained	Posted - 2003.06.24 17:29:00 - [41] Heh....Here's one from Beta: I was flying around in my little rifter in .2 system. I was picking up some heavy missles for my nice no missle launchers. After I leave the station I am at, 4 people jump in all about the same time. They start ranting on the local chat about how they are going to *&^% these asteroids into oblivion with their shiny new Probes. I'm thinking "Great! I could make a few isk off of this." I politley ask which roid field they are strip mining, and low and behold they tell me. I begin my preperation for my attack. I warp in, warp scramble one ship while firing as much firepower as the Rifter's capacity can hold at another. The Probe goes down. now the other 2 Probes who I had not targeted had already warped out. The guy with now with his nice new pod was following in close suite. I know turn my attention to the warp scrambled Probe. I begin slowley taking out his Probe (Damn Cap!) and once I destroy it I begin to warp lock his egg. I say on local chat "If you don't want to see your freind podded, you will proceed to place 150k isk into my account ;)." One of the Probe's that got away starts blantley cursing, while the pod I have scrambled starts pleeding with them to just do it. Eventually they give in and transfer the money to my account, and I let the poor guy go. =D ___________________________________________________________________ Hair is Over-rated.
Setec	Posted - 2003.06.24 18:14:00 - [42] I blew up the Unwise Trader's ship, but I didn't podkill him. I still get a kick out of the people who think it's some kind of problem for me if they simply reveal that I'm a pirate. Sort of reminds me of a little kid tattling, "I'm telling my alliance on you!" The unreasonable threats are funny, too. People often promise to employ far more resources than I know they're willing to commit to seek revenge for some really minor loss. According to currently accumulated threats, there are about 185 Moas currently hunting me full-time. Oddly enough I have not encountered any of them. What luck! I had a somewhat amusing story from this morning to post but I edited/erased it since it was too long to fit in 3 posts. I'll probably post it later with other stories on a website or something. Edited by: Setec on 24/06/2003 18:25:03 ___________________________________________ Space Invaders website: http://www.si-corp.net
Saladin	Posted - 2003.06.24 18:17:00 - [43] Hi, I'm not a pirate, though I lost 2 ships to pirates (and destroyed one pirate ship myself). In any case, this story happened near a station. I was just outside the station waiting for a friend, and rifter comes up to me and locks on. He then warp scrambles me, and I'm thinking to myself "Why is he doing this at a station?". I don't move and decided to see what will come next. He starts firing at me and I was about to fire back but noticed that my shields were barely taking any damage at all. He kept firing for like 5 seconds more until the sentry guns took him out. This was obviously a new player who wanted to pirate, and I felt sorry for him. Though a rifter may seem cheap to alot of people, it is your pride and joy when you are starting out. I sent him an e-mail saying that I was sorry for the loss of his ship, and warned him about the sentry guns at stations. I went to his cargo container and took his items, 2 250 arty's, a warp scrambler and 17 units of Titanium sabot. As I put the items in my hangar I felt a wave of shame come over me. There was no honor in taking this loot. I felt like I was taking advantage of a newbie, pirate or not. I won't mention his name lest people make fun of him. But if you want your stuff back please e-mail me.
Setec	Posted - 2003.06.24 18:18:00 - [44] Edited/erased: Message was just too long. :P I may repost this and other conversations at a later time. Edited by: Setec on 24/06/2003 18:24:01 ___________________________________________ Space Invaders website: http://www.si-corp.net
Mach	Posted - 2003.06.24 18:29:00 - [45] The chat log post that setec deleted involved him destroying a lone frigate. Very pirate like of him. I hope Sarkos and Hippey catch up with him one day and his band of rif raf
Setec	Posted - 2003.06.24 18:35:00 - [46] Yeah, I destroyed a lone rifter from a wealthy corporation. I was going to hold him up for 150k but he refused to enter a chat with me so I blew him up. I didn't pod him. Feel free to think I'm the devil, etc. ___________________________________________ Space Invaders website: http://www.si-corp.net
billy	Posted - 2003.06.25 11:58:00 - [47] Well setec done me to seems to be one of best kinda pirates around if you do bump into him just give him what he wants and you should be fine Good work setec try not to be like the others
Reddari	Posted - 2003.06.25 12:12:00 - [48] Setec has an interesting reputation. He seems to have quite a lot of ECM/ECCM stuff going on so I advise those wishing to take him down to take some equipment along themselves. He was last seen in a blackbird which has **** for shields but a galore of slots to fit all that nice ECM/ECCM stuff. Just counter this and you'll take him down in an instant. ECM/ECCM is just simple math, his Blackbird has a number of ECM point, his modules have others and your problem is to find the weak spot. You just need to look carefully at all the ECM stuff you have lying around and at the Blackbirds stats and voilß... next time it's Setec telling an amusing story of his encounter with an opponent that got the better of him. ----------------------- DROP - we didn't cut it -----------------------
Endureth	Posted - 2003.06.25 19:10:00 - [49] I don't have the exact log but it went something like this: Me: Drop your cargo. Them: No Me: Drop your cargo now. Them: I don't have any cargo. Me: Then eject from your ship, I own it now. Them: What? Get lost. (we are getting closer to the gate) Me: This is your last warning, do as I say or die. Them: Get lost, you can't kill me before I get through the gate anyway. Me: You don't want to go through that gate. Them: Whatever, bye. (victem jumps through the gate to be greated by a second cruiser which opens fire and destroyes the ship) Them: WTF? COME ON, that's NOT RIGHT. Me: You were warned. Turns out the guy didn't have any cargo after all. -E
Linak'h	Posted - 2003.06.25 19:18:00 - [50] These aint funny stories. More like Circle Jerk or Ego Stoking Tales.
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.25 23:34:00 - [51] Linka'h, I would have started a funny miners story but rocks aren't funny and neither are you. Have a nice day
Prada	Posted - 2003.06.26 00:13:00 - [52] Already posted this once before. I was approaching a gate in a 0.9 system after purchasing a new Thorax. Another Thorax piloted by a pirate named ChandraGupta (ProjectMayhem) locks onto me as soon as I come out of warp, and does something that causes my ship to flash (no clue what it is). I assume he fired on me because shortly afterwards, the area was swarming with CONCORD police and he dropped or lost his lock on me. He was near a gate, so I'm not sure if he managed to escape or not, but I assume he was webbed and scrambled by CONCORD.
Setec	Posted - 2003.06.26 04:07:00 - [53] Quote: next time it's Setec telling an amusing story of his encounter with an opponent that got the better of him. I've actually got a couple of those, though both are from before I'd done any serious pirating myself. And it was closer to release so I didn't understand the game as well as I do now. I've lost two cruisers since release. My first Moa: I was pretty happy with how I was set up with my 250mm gauss guns, kicking butt against NPC pirates out in Venal. I was actually mining (not something I do often) with one laser and fighting off NPCs with a few 250s, and some blackbird (Acuna Traos) warped in. I figured he was like the others who'd passed by, not there to harm me. Then he targets me and start shooting right as guristas spawn on me. I was pretty shocked that I'd actually encountered a PK, and I started firing on him, thinking I'd kick his butt... but I couldn't do decent damage at all! I tried to microwarp away, but the pathing code around a big asteroid kept me from moving and he tore me to pieces with hardly a scratch. That was my first lesson in the power of shield hardeners. My first Blackbird: After I lost that first Moa I decided to try out some player pirating in a blackbird. I wanted to use all the pirating goodies--passive targeter, cargo scanner, webifiers and disruptor and everything to "do it right," lurking and quietly scanning and picking my victims carefully. I decided to try it out in a roid field and find some miners, when I ran into a rifter using projectiles and doing surprisingly good damage against me. To my surprise HE warp jammed ME and his friend in a stabber warped in and they killed me--they were actually a pair of pirates hunting in the same system I was. So I learned a big lesson there: filling my medium slots with modules that don't help me kill will get me killed. So I started out as a noob and I still have plenty to learn, but I'm a fast learner and I haven't lost a ship since then. That was something like a month ago. ___________________________________________ Space Invaders website: http://www.si-corp.net
Janus Rebelknight	Posted - 2003.06.26 04:57:00 - [54] some great stories there especially from setec. You roleplay your character very well. Totally unforgiving!! I'd have let a total newbie go with a good shield wacking but your actions have a sinisterness to them I hope you don't take back into real life with you! People should realise however that there are powerful pirates out there. Its only common sense. Howvever this reminds me of the guy in Freelancer (very similar in how pirates stalk their prey) who was attacked by player pirates around New Berlin. I killed a few to clear the space lanes, but they just kept coming back up from the surface so the trader guy was stuck. I messaged him to say to stay there, or to leave with NO cargo an to say NOTHING to provoke the pirates. However he kept on buying equipment to trade and kept on leaving New Berlin mouthing off at the pirates as he did so. Of course the pirates would then ignore me for the 5 seconds to lock onto him and blow him away. He did this no less than 4 times! Soon enough I was able to draw the pirates away by 'warping' off as they killed the trader with them in hot pursuit as they were bored with killing him. Whats worse is the trader started following me around, abusing me and demanding cash for what he'd lost. I gave him a 100K to get going again (I had bags of cash) but he'd lost '3 mil' and wanted it back. If I didn't pay he'd never play again. I had to shield stomp him a few times to convince him that he wasn't getting anymore than 100K lol. Of course in Freelancer, pirates can see where the other players are, and tend to hang around Manhatten in max level ships destroying new characters as they leave to start playing for the first time. I've been iced 5 or 6 times by pirates as i left manhatten. very frustrating. the moral of the tale. bad apples on both sides spoil it for everyone. Its individual reps I worry about not corps or a certain type of player. ----- Janus "I'm not a stripper, I'm a miner."
WIggs	Posted - 2003.06.26 07:38:00 - [55] Most of these stories are sad...
Lord Zap	Posted - 2003.06.26 11:58:00 - [56] I have an amusing story. Early in the game a bunch of us were hunting in the gusandall area, we were all ganged and were camping the station. After a quiet spell The Reverend was getting an itchy trigger finger and so he decided to fire a missile at the station. We all warped out immediately to avoid the sentry gun fire which considering we were in merlins/rifters at the time were pretty nasty. Unfortunately (hahaha) Commander Diaz took that precise moment to undock and could only watch dumbfounded as he got owned by the sentry guns. This was his 3rd ship in 1 week and to compound the situation the sentry guns podded him too ;p. I was still laughing the next morning.
Riddari	Posted - 2003.06.26 12:42:00 - [57] Quote: and does something that causes my ship to flash (no clue what it is). That was a little gift from him. He must have hit all his F-buttons and one of them had a shield transporter unit. He just gave you some extra shield power :p Edited by: Riddari on 26/06/2003 12:47:38 ¼©¼ a history
Linak'h	Posted - 2003.06.26 13:31:00 - [58] My oh my. Crepiscule you are such a sad little pirate. Do you feel inadequate in some way that you need approval from others for screwing somebody over in a game? I feel has if the whole world has come crashing down on me because Crepiscule says I am not funny! Let me tell you something Crepiscule in language that you might understand. Linak'h not trying to be funny. Linak'h was just telling it like Linak'h was reading it. Linak'h was reading sad little stories for the sole purpose of inflating the egos of sad little pirates. Never thought I would read a thread where pirates were kissing each others behinds with stories of how they ruin other players days. And you guys have the balls to sometimes say that your victims actually enjoyed being blown out of space or riped off? How big are your heads? Hope you found this post funny. I lied. I really don't care if funny or not. Why? Because I think pirates are scum and lower then lawyer ****. Bye bye. Hugs and kisses. See you on the flip side.
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.26 15:34:00 - [59] Linak'h, I sense a lot of hostility in you. I can understand where your frustration must be coming from. Since you couldn't even understand my first post where I said, "If you are a pirate and have a funny story please post it. With all the pirate bashing going on we all could use a good laugh." I'm going to guess that EVE may be a bit too advanced for you. You see, contrary to what many players think, there is some thinking involved. Let me suggest a few alternatives that may be better suited to your skill level. 1. Tetras (an oldie but goodie) 2. The little mermaid. (Sing happy songs with that funny lobster. It's a favorite with my 4 year old. 3. And of course Asteroids. (I'm sure your more than qualified for this one) Now here's a ticket for a return trip back on that short bus. Go away and grief some other thread. Or better yet, just go away.
Linak'h	Posted - 2003.06.26 15:53:00 - [60] How very sweet of you Crepiscule. Kiss Kiss. Giving me pointers on the type of games you pirates like to play on your off time. And such manly games at that! I am suprised you even responded to my post. Since I am just a "thread griefer" and has we all know grifers should be ignored. Am I hitting a little close to home on the "kissing behind part", the "ego" part, or could it be the "big head" part? Or are you haveing a slow day burning noobs at the stake? Oh, a little word to the not-so-wise, I am just having a little fun. Not quite on par with the fun I am sure you are having with ruining peoples weeks in the game (is that like pulling wings off of flys?). I just got to ask (in case you somehow didn't realise because of your Pirate Coolness that this might happen) but what do you expect by starting a love-fest-aint-I-a-cool-pirate-by-ruining-some-peoples-fun thread and not expect a response? And another thing. I aint going away. I think you really like me and don't want me to leave you party just yet. Bye bye. Hugs and kisses. See you on the flip side.
Reathe	Posted - 2003.06.26 16:59:00 - [61] Yeah Was aproaching a jumpgate, everything looks normal in warp. Screen pauses for 20 seconds and then . . I guess that my po. . .Ahhhhhhhh . . .Back to clone central then ! Oh Sorry, thats not funny is it!
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.26 17:02:00 - [62] Here's another tip. If these bother you so much don't read them. For Linak'h and anyone else for that matter, who are worried about loosing weeks of work to pirates, go find another game. No matter how hard you may want to believe that EVE is one big hug fest, it just isn't so. This game is PVP. Let me say it slow for you so you can understand it. P V P. That means player verses player. Not player verses Plagioclase. Edited by: Crepiscule on 26/06/2003 17:02:33
Ilia Volyova	Posted - 2003.06.26 17:05:00 - [63] Well, for gatecamping pirates it's basically Player vs Plagioclase. Don't see much difference between a ship which cannot react on a threat for 10s and a rock.
Linak'h	Posted - 2003.06.26 17:18:00 - [64] I knew you liked me or you wouldn't have wrote my name. Am I bored or what? I felt the force and just had to come back. I just love your classic "If these bother you so much don't read them". Such a comeback. One of your pirate buddies give you that one? Now it is my turn to bring in to question your reading comprehension skills. Where in all that I wrote did I say anything about losing a weeks worth of MY work. Dude, buddy, pirate scum, it only takes me a weekend to get a Stabber (if I am lazy). I was talking about the people just starting out who don't know the kind of ****s (scum-sucking-grifing-pirates) that the game has in it now. Oh, I know the game aint a love fest. But I get a laugh out of you pirates having a group love-in thread. Kiss kiss. Hug hug. I beg to differ on this Player Vs Player fantasy that you oh so cool Pirates have about Eve. It's more along the lines of "Which bug/defect in the game can I use today to screw up somebodies fun" game. Let me count the ways: 1. Ammo range restrictions not in game yet and wont be when next patch comes out. 2. Lag is a big problem when a lot of containers/roids are being loaded. Gatecampers love this one. 3. Lets blockade a choke point in the middle of Empire space. Security level of system is only 0.4. Concord aint coming for us, they are eating dounuts at Krispy Kream. Should I go on? Can your pirate brain handle anymore? Bye bye. See you on the flip side. Bye bye. Hugs and kisses. See you on the flip side.
Buddy Bruehller	Posted - 2003.06.26 17:39:00 - [65] This time I am fly a rifter and ambush the player. Ships of 12 come to me and I are lock them all and demand the money and cargo they had in them. When they are all empty of the cash and loot I opened the fire on all of them. Tyhe all scream to me to stop and I laff to all of them. Then I did to them a kill the pod./ I was to laff so hard. I can wait hardly to do it this time again.
Crepiscule	Posted - 2003.06.26 18:53:00 - [66] I apologize to everyone who has had to read the last few posts. Apparently the only kind of posts that someone can make on these boards are about how evil M0o is or how much pirates are ruining the game. I will remember that next time and make sure any I start in the future are based on those topics. Maybe a moderator can lock this before it degenerates any further. Have a nice day.
Cachorro Louco	Posted - 2003.06.26 19:05:00 - [67] Hi mom! Mad Dog says: Bet I'm the only true Reverend in the game. It says so on the printout I got from an Internet site.
Linak'h	Posted - 2003.06.26 19:11:00 - [68] Oh my! I made Crepiscule whine. I feel so bad being a thread grifer. Remember this next time pirate. A thread concerning pirates backslapping themselves on a job-well-done is usually a low security (0.4 or lower) thread and is fair game. And it will take a while for a moderate to come out and blast me. But there is a bright side. You don't have to worry about lag because there isn't any. Bye bye. Hugs and kisses. See you on the flip side.
Teutobod	Posted - 2003.06.26 19:12:00 - [69] I say keep the stories coming. Some of them are dumb, while others are funny. I personally prefer Setec's stories, and I hope he posts some more. I don't see this as an "ego" thread, anyone can start a thread with stories about unfortunate pirates that got sunk and podded, or did someting mindbogling stupid. My five cents. ---------------- Killing Amarr Scum & Liberating Slaves Since Birth
Bentguru	Posted - 2003.06.26 19:15:00 - [70] not so much a pirate story as the story of my one and only encounter with a PK. I'm cruising along in my brand new Maller, outfitted with the best equipement i could grab on her (which admittedly wasn't the best). I knew that "The Gang" has been camping a gate in Poitot pretty well for the past 2 weeks, but being rash as i was i decide to hell with it and attempt 2 run the blockade. I checked the local before going in and saw 2 Gang members, so i decide that i can probably get through. I warp 2 the gate and only 1 is there, name of Trap, conveinitly sitting about 5k out from me. I'm not targeted in the 1st few seconds so i start thinking i might get through this peacfully, wrong. Sure enough i get stasis and scrambled and Trap opens up with (i think) 2 turrets. Needless to say i'm not likeing the current state of affairs and open up with my 5 turrets. Doesn't take him very long to run away. But the part that makes me appreciate how lucky i was is that about 3 seconds before i jump i check the local again and low and behold, the rest of the Gang (about 6) appear. lucky me, eh?

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