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Life in Goonswarm

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Vincent VanDamme EVE University Ivy League 37	Posted - 2012.06.26 09:33:00 - [1] - Quote Hoping this might not be threadnaughted with screams and flames. Anyway, The view from outside Goonswarm is pretty weird. The perception is fairly toxic and there are threads upon threads of "MOFG THE GSF SUX BAN THEM" as well as "STFU PUBBIE SCUM HATE WILL GANK YOU LOLOLOLOL". I'm actually not interested in that. I'm actually interested in the reality. GSF members, could I ask you. What is it actually like in your alliance? The few Corps/alliances i have been part of have been a lot of fun, with some great camaraderie. A few good events etc. With the size of your alliance, i'm sure you guys have some awesome anecdotes of stuff you have done. I'm just interested. (If you don't like GSF, please dont rage here. Make a new thread please?)
Signal11th 546	Posted - 2012.06.26 09:48:00 - [2] - Quote I imagine they are like every other alliance out there, just with added Americans. God Said "Come Forth and receive eternal life!"-á I came second and won a toaster.
Beautiful Frelcia Enlightened Industries Test Alliance Please Ignore 13	Posted - 2012.06.26 10:33:00 - [3] - Quote Im not in GSF but: - Oh we have a new bro in fleet. He just lost his rifter... Please show him your love and ISKs. 250 pilots in fleet donating "newbro" 1M-10M instantly. -(In TEST/ENL-I) New bro needs Drake. If i have it i will give it (hul+fit)... (oh and i will pay insurance) - New bro cant do anoms? Low on SP. have my destro. Salvage and enjoy. Shadown pawn? Cool take it too. (im not joking) -We are paying for PVP. (up to 1B per month). Yes we will pay for your ship too. - + newbros are special snowflakes on LOGI watch list. - no drama, fun only Join us! ........... "Hold your cloak and wait for me - little bees, little bees"
Father Snuggles GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 32	Posted - 2012.06.26 10:55:00 - [4] - Quote I find the experience to be pretty dreadful. I constantly get mocked for being black and german, though I'm not sure from which of those attributes more ridicule is coming from. I'm constantly broke because the whole isk-for-newbies thing is a lie. Being broke is also why I spend most of my time on my knees attempting to siphon miniscule amounts of isk out of rather non-miniscule, hose-shaped objects. But I get by, I guess...one day at a time.
Ivan Ward Wildly Inappropriate Goonswarm Federation 76	Posted - 2012.06.26 11:45:00 - [5] - Quote Never not turn on mwd in TEST jumbridge network. "Hot pilots we have problems too, we're just like you."
Ivan Ward Wildly Inappropriate Goonswarm Federation 76	Posted - 2012.06.26 11:47:00 - [6] - Quote Father Snuggles wrote: I find the experience to be pretty dreadful. I constantly get mocked for being black and german, though I'm not sure from which of those attributes more ridicule is coming from. I'm constantly broke because the whole isk-for-newbies thing is a lie. Being broke is also why I spend most of my time on my knees attempting to siphon miniscule amounts of isk out of rather non-miniscule, hose-shaped objects. But I get by, I guess...one day at a time. Stop being black AND german then. "Hot pilots we have problems too, we're just like you."
Father Snuggles GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 33	Posted - 2012.06.26 12:25:00 - [7] - Quote Aww, who am I kidding, we all know that wasn't the truth. But heck, I have a couple of spare minutes, I might as well write up a few lines about how life really is in Goonwaffe. So my name is Father Snuggles and I've been with the Waffe for about 8 months now, I believe. Upon joining, I learned that the corp and the alliance itself if in a fairly straightforward military hierarchy, but I guess that makes sense what with the huge numbers. Upon joining, assuming you're joining as a single member, not with a corporation, you are assigned to a regiment (like a squad in other corps), there are 4 "regiments" in total, "Alpha", "Sigma", "Rho" and "Omega". I was assigned to Alpha and was told I could advance to other regiments depending on my skill and k/d-ratio and while I believed this initially because of most of the more experienced guys I had heard of were in Rho, it turned out I was just being trolled because there is no real measure of skill or k/d in goonswarm, as is public knowledge. (alas, I didn't have this figured out in the beginning) Each regiment is divided into 3-4 battalion-sized units that are divided by timezone to make the organization easier and allow for a better projection of activity. US-battalion, Euro-battalion, Ociania-battalion and so forth. So each regiment has a european, american, etc. unit. Living in germany, I ended up in Euro-battalion and, as battalions get to choose their own names for a more personalized feel of the whole goonswarm-experience, ours is called "European Goonion". Battalion commanders are chosen by competence as well as social skills and appointed by the council of goonswarm, which, in turn, is headed by the chairman of the council, The Mittani. (This is also where the chinese-themed propaganda poster "Chairman lmao" came from, by the way) The battalion commander of European Goonion (which, we just refer to as "The Unit" ourselves) is a guy called Dominionix who is this massive irish-sounding dude with a deep baritone voice and he works as a complaint consultant for a rather large maritime research corporation, so he knows what he's talking about. He is pretty much constantly angry and not a very friendly guy over comms, but as long as you stay out of his line of fire (and most of us do), you're fine. Then there's Tomytronic, Domi's top-lieutenant and enforcer. He pretty much is in charge of day-to-day operations and keeps everyone toeing the party line. He's also the one in charge of battalion reimbursement so you don't want to **** this guy off, which, unfortunately, I managed to do within the first weeks of being in the unit. I mentioned my affectionate love for a TV show called "The Wire" and he just completely trashed it, saying it's vastly inferior to shows like "Entourage" and "Nip/tuck". I haven't seen either of those, so I'll probably try to watch them to get back onto his good side, but being yelled at over a personal preference by one of the most important guys was pretty hurtful. Tomy is also in charge of all the battalion-newsletters (we get one for each month) and sends them out punctually on the first of the month, except in cases where the 1st is on a sunday of national holiday, in which we get our update a day early. Our reimbursement program, by the way, is one of the most renowned ones in goonswarm. Each battalion has their own approved fittings for ships and gets a certain allowance in tech-money from the council to pay out to its members. This guarantees that each battalion has an overview of what their members can and should (!) fly. Some battalions dish out waay to much money for Machariels and such which is a complete waste if you ask me. We get a reimbursement bonus if we specifically train for ships that are asked for. Currently I'm training for the Hyena, which is going to be used in a new battalion-doctrine (because of the new target painter being introduced) and that'll almost net me 5 million isk in profit per (!) lost hull. Every battalion is overseen by a regimental inspection officer that is appointed by the council to make sure everyone runs their ship nicely and not in a fashion that wouldn't really work with the alliance's direction. Our oversight officer is a chick called Ivana Twinkle. I think she's croatian or something, but I can't really place the accent. She's pretty hot too since she posted a couple of pictures of her job as a waitress in a beach club. (and you just know they only choose the hottest croatian chicks for that job ;) ) She's kinda the good soul of the unit that everyone goes to when they got yelled at by Domi. She built me back up morally when Tomy completely crushed me in my first week and even gave me a free T2 fit hurricane (that I couldn't fly back then, but I had something to live and train for) Then there's deadtear, who I think is from finland. He's pretty much a veteran having been in the game for a long time, but oddly never got into a position of responsibility. I'm not entirely sure why, but I think it's because he's happy at his level flying with regular line members. I can't really see him in any role of leadership of capital piloting. Deadtear is the kind of reasonable, friendly dude that would step into a verbal conflict and mediate with arguments of reason to calm the waves. I'm pretty sure European Goonion would end up hacking itself to pieces over petty bickering if it weren't for him. Deadtear and Tomy are pretty good friends, which is weird, because Deadtear took me under his wing immediately while I think Tomy absolutely despises me.
Father Snuggles GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 33	Posted - 2012.06.26 12:25:00 - [8] - Quote Then there's a guy called School Nickname Worldmonkey (I don't know how he got to that name either), who is our battalion's pvp officer. Basically, if you need fitting advice or pointers on how to fly any specific ship in the game, you go to him. Occasionally, he'll even take you out himself for a couple of flying lessons. After I was capable of flying a hound, he volunteered to bridge me around in his deadspace-fitted Sin. He's also the guy that get's to approve hulls for your reimbursement profile. I'm currently approved for all minmatar T1 frigs, assault ships, interceptors, the hound and the hurricane. I'm currently working toward being approved for the Maelstrom, which is one of the most important ships in our Alphafleet doctrine. Then there are a couple of guys that run the counter-intelligence team for our battalion, mephistophelesse, Emmerik and Rikard Stark. Ironically, they're all german and, with the battalion being led by a pretty much all-anglosaxon cabal, that was the last thing I expected to see. They're the guys that you don't want to joke around about intel, capital ship movements, etc. because you'll be purged pretty quickly and blacklisted from the entire CFC. Also, every battalion has their own posting-commissar. I'm not sure if this is public knowledge, but Goonswarm is pretty serious about posting. There are no internet colloquialisms, memes, or image macros allowed and your posting is kept under pretty close scrutiny by one of these guys. Ours is a guy called Lord Xander, who was chosen for his exceptional posting over several years. You don't get appointed into a position like that for nothing. While he's a relatively nice dude, he's what he calls GÇPstraight-edgeGÇ£, which I've never heard, but it's basically abstaining from alcohol and drugs and stuff like that, so it's pretty hard to be around him sometimes since he get's pretty preachy and condescending towards people that even talk about beer or weed. Sjinta is, i think, the rl-wife of Mister Vee, but I've never heard her over comms, so I'm not sure if I'm being trolled here. She runs an alliance-wide lottery where you have to submit My-Little-Pony-related fanfiction (it's a bit of a Goonswarm in-joke, I don't think they're serious about it) so she's one of the more well-known people in Goonswarm. She also runs the regiment's capital construction program. (we only have one per regiment, because one per battalion would be too complicated in terms of supercap construction, I hear) Ironically, she hates everything about actually flying supercaps, so while you'd see the fruits of her work crapping out titans fairly quickly, you'd never actually see her go near one despite being talked into it by Vee. Mister Vee is easily the second-best FC in Goonswarm and while his friends get to call him Vee, line members have to adress him with his full title until they're experienced or important enough in the alliance. I've been on quite a few fleet ops led by him, but I don't really appreciate his style of leadership. Everything needs to be hopped-to immediately and there's a generally militaristic atmosphere on comms once he logs in. You have to use words like GÇPaffirmativeGÇ£, GÇPnegativeGÇ£, GÇPclicksGÇ£ instead of kilometers, GÇPten fourGÇ£ and so on. I'm not really opposed to concepts that promote fleet discipline, but the way Mister Vee enforces it is maybe a little too much. He constantly gets angry over people breaching comm silence and then goes on minute-long rants in his weird russian accent. Someone once said he's the rl-brother of Shaddoo, but that makes no sense whatsoever and I know for a fact that Shaddoo is from Portugal. Isphirel is our battalion treasurer, which is funny because in yiddish his name literally translates into GÇPhe who gets drunk while naked at a cash registerGÇ£, but hey, that's goonswarm for you. He works all the spreadsheets and makes sure Tomy doesn't pay out too much cash or pays out to the wrong people that may not be approved for certain shiptypes. That's pretty much my five cents, if there's anything you'd like to know outside of this, feel free to drop me a line. Right now I have to get back to my hangar because Mister Vee sent out another jabber broadcast in cyrillics that we have to put into google translate first. Something about Delve or so, I don't know. Russians...
Vincent VanDamme EVE University Ivy League 37	Posted - 2012.06.26 13:16:00 - [9] - Quote Father Snuggles wrote: SNIP That's pretty much my five cents, if there's anything you'd like to know outside of this, feel free to drop me a line. Right now I have to get back to my hangar because Mister Vee sent out another jabber broadcast in cyrillics that we have to put into google translate first. Something about Delve or so, I don't know. Russians... Thanks a lot. It actually was a very interesting read. I can see why GSF has a lot of really committed members. I think we demonise too much so its a refreshing change to get knowledge of the nitty gritty and to realise that the guys/gals in GSF are just the same as the rest of us, trying to have fun. Thanks for taking the time to give a rundown, and some anecdotes.
Ivana Twinkle GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 256	Posted - 2012.06.26 13:27:00 - [10] - Quote Hi, good story. Don't worry about that jerk dominionix, He can't help himself.

Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1170	Posted - 2012.06.26 13:37:00 - [11] - Quote why aren't i in your summary, snuggles? jesus christ, some people
Polly Oxford GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 44	Posted - 2012.06.26 13:37:00 - [12] - Quote Since I'm in the same battalion as Father Snuggles, I can confirm pretty much everything he says. It sounds like it's hard work, but when you finally understand the dynamics of the group you really get to have a whole lot of fun.
Enaris Kerle GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 92	Posted - 2012.06.26 13:43:00 - [13] - Quote As a Rho, I can only laugh at the terrible players in Alpha. When playing with real human people instead of pond scum, you just get 150b ISK of our tech money each month to reimburse your own ships as you see fit. Gallente born and raised, and tutored as a pleasure slave and courtesan to the exotic tastes of the Amarri court. Jade's career veered violently off course when a diplomatic envoy's transport was blown to pieces in mysterious circumstances and she was rescued from the escape pods by the enigmatic genetic mastermind Athule Snanm.
Garnoo Eternity INC. Goonswarm Federation 58	Posted - 2012.06.26 14:03:00 - [14] - Quote we are so terrible that there are plenty of guys willing to pay billions to join us! People are going to try to ruin your day. Get together with others, ruin their day back - this is EvE
Vincent VanDamme EVE University Ivy League 37	Posted - 2012.06.26 14:08:00 - [15] - Quote Garnoo wrote: we are so terrible that there are plenty of guys willing to pay billions to join us! Ill give you ten pence and two buttons. Actually, one button. With your Tech loot you should be paying me, just for being awesome. ;)
Aryth GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 432	Posted - 2012.06.26 14:33:00 - [16] - Quote There are probably a lot of things we do that other alliances do also. We just do it in a bigger scale. For example: We have a jabber channel called gs_isk. 200-300 Dudes sit in this channel discussing general economic stuff about EVE. How to make ISK, how to trade, how to market manipulate, how to speculate, picks to invest in etc. Now, other people might have similar areas to hang out in, and there are even in-game channels to facilitate this. However, it functions quite differently when you are all in the same allied alliances and have common goals. The end result is something that has the power to move any market in EVE. (Note, this doesn't always work out well for us) It's one thing to do something in EVE well, it's quite another to do it well with 200 other dudes able to do it well and support you also.
Vincent VanDamme EVE University Ivy League 37	Posted - 2012.06.26 14:50:00 - [17] - Quote Aryth wrote: There are probably a lot of things we do that other alliances do also. We just do it in a bigger scale. For example: We have a jabber channel called gs_isk. 200-300 Dudes sit in this channel discussing general economic stuff about EVE. How to make ISK, how to trade, how to market manipulate, how to speculate, picks to invest in etc. Now, other people might have similar areas to hang out in, and there are even in-game channels to facilitate this. However, it functions quite differently when you are all in the same allied alliances and have common goals. The end result is something that has the power to move any market in EVE. (Note, this doesn't always work out well for us) It's one thing to do something in EVE well, it's quite another to do it well with 200 other dudes able to do it well and support you also. Now that piques interest. The economics of the game is a very cool part of the experience, and having like minded people...awesome.
Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1170	Posted - 2012.06.26 14:59:00 - [18] - Quote someone tells me how to spend my money, and i do it
Signal11th 547	Posted - 2012.06.26 15:41:00 - [19] - Quote Garnoo wrote: we are so terrible that there are plenty of stupid guys willing to pay billions to join us! fixed, also where's the tache gone Blawrf? God Said "Come Forth and receive eternal life!"-á I came second and won a toaster.
Reduvius GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 136	Posted - 2012.06.26 15:43:00 - [20] - Quote At first I thought that being forced to go on mining ops lasting several hours sucked, but I have come to accept the way things are. Sometimes the overseer even pays me a bit of isk if I go above my weekly mineral quota.

Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1170	Posted - 2012.06.26 15:44:00 - [21] - Quote Signal11th wrote: Garnoo wrote: we are so terrible that there are plenty of stupid guys willing to pay billions to join us! fixed, also where's the tache gone Blawrf? i'm not sure barf ever had a tache?
Signal11th 548	Posted - 2012.06.26 15:46:00 - [22] - Quote Blawrf McTaggart wrote: Signal11th wrote: Garnoo wrote: we are so terrible that there are plenty of stupid guys willing to pay billions to join us! fixed, also where's the tache gone Blawrf? i'm not sure barf ever had a tache? humm I;ve really got to stay off the drink. God Said "Come Forth and receive eternal life!"-á I came second and won a toaster.
Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1170	Posted - 2012.06.26 15:47:00 - [23] - Quote http://i.imgur.com/KOfy5.jpg no you're right he did
Signal11th 548	Posted - 2012.06.26 15:49:00 - [24] - Quote Blawrf McTaggart wrote: http://i.imgur.com/KOfy5.jpg no you're right he did Cool, can stay on the booze for now then. God Said "Come Forth and receive eternal life!"-á I came second and won a toaster.
Bruce McKenna GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 3	Posted - 2012.06.26 16:17:00 - [25] - Quote Reduvius wrote: At first I thought that being forced to go on mining ops lasting several hours sucked, but I have come to accept the way things are. Sometimes the overseer even pays me a bit of isk if I go above my weekly mineral quota. I've never even been paid the combined months of mining I've done. :(
Ivana Twinkle GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 257	Posted - 2012.06.26 16:46:00 - [26] - Quote Uh yea the mining :( Some days when I'm sitting in my mining kestrel in VFK, I think that I'll never make this weeks quota. What's really bummer is that many times some dumb goon will shoot my jetcan.
Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1172	Posted - 2012.06.26 16:54:00 - [27] - Quote Ivana Twinkle wrote: Uh yea the mining :( Some days when I'm sitting in my mining kestrel in VFK, I think that I'll never make this weeks quota. What's really bummer is that many times some dumb goon will shoot my jetcan. usually me, sorry.
Snot Shot Interstellar Brotherhood of Gravediggers The 0rphanage 280	Posted - 2012.06.26 16:54:00 - [28] - Quote IGÇÖll step in here for a noteGÇªGÇªGÇªGÇª.your title and poast contradicts itself which is throwing people off a bit. GÇ£GoonSwarmGÇ¥ is the Alliance which took down BoB and fought in the epic battles of Delve I & II. GÇ£GonnSwarm FederationGÇ¥ is the name The Martini used when he lost the name GÇ£GoonSwarmGÇ¥ and was too embarrassed to put DOT at the end of the new Alliance he made.... I hope this helpedGÇªGÇªGÇª.carry onGÇª.. . GÇ£God grant me the serenity to accept the things I canGÇÖt shoot, the courage to shoot the things I can, and the wisdom to GTFO!!GÇ¥GÇô Snot Shot - 2012.....Yeah I'm a killin machine..... http://eve-kill.net/?a=pilot_detail&plt_id=50753
Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1172	Posted - 2012.06.26 16:54:00 - [29] - Quote i mistake it for a guristas eradicator
Blawrf McTaggart GoonWaffe Goonswarm Federation 1172	Posted - 2012.06.26 16:54:00 - [30] - Quote Snot Shot wrote: IGÇÖll step in here for a noteGÇªGÇªGÇªGÇª.your title and poast contradicts itself which is throwing people off a bit. GÇ£GoonSwarmGÇ¥ is the Alliance which took down BoB and fought in the epic battles of Delve I & II. GÇ£GonnSwarm FederationGÇ¥ is the name The Martini used when he lost the name GÇ£GoonSwarmGÇ¥ and was too embarrassed to put DOT at the end of the new Alliance he made.... I hope this helpedGÇªGÇªGÇª.carry onGÇª.. . hey snot shot just shot snot all over this thread how are you snot shot?



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