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Istvaan Shogaatsu
Caldari Guiding Hand Social Club
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Posted - 2010.05.12 14:29:00 -
[1]
Fellow veteran pilots of GalNet - I have a silly question.
I am suffering from frequent headaches... migraines, really... as well as occasional nosebleeds. These seem to occur more frequently with each skillpack I train. More worrying is the fact that I am now able to hurl small objects with the power of my mind.
I realize I don't live the healthiest lifestyle - I smoke, I drink, I snort, I've been cloned twice now, had dozens of implants done... uploaded tons and tons of neural data. Hell, my neural port looks worse than a Jin-Mei hooker's moneymaker after the Brutor circus passed through town.
So, how do you keep your teraflop-hole clean and sanitary? How can I combat these headaches? And how do you deal with these pesky manifestations of telekinesis?
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Scarlet Strange
The Scoop
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Posted - 2010.05.12 14:37:00 -
[2]
So, how do you keep your teraflop-hole clean and sanitary? Daily cleaning. If there is yellow discharge, see a doctor.
How can I combat these headaches? Analgesics. Or boosters. Though from the last question there, you probably already have had too much of those.
And how do you deal with these pesky manifestations of telekinesis? Therapy, and realizing there is no bending spoon, it is simply you who are imagining it. Or you forgot to unplug your VR set. Unplug from the pod once in a while. Take a walk. Realize that there is more to life than simply the pod, the goo, and the teraflop-hole.
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Istvaan Shogaatsu
Caldari Guiding Hand Social Club
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Posted - 2010.05.12 14:39:00 -
[3]
I'm not insane. I have proof, I asked a number of doctors, and they categorically stated I was perfectly sane.
I did this at gunpoint, so I know they were telling the truth.
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Scarlet Strange
The Scoop
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Posted - 2010.05.12 14:42:00 -
[4]
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu I did this at gunpoint, so I know they were telling the truth.
See, that's your mistake. You shoot them, make sure they are terminally wounded, and then ask for the truthful answer. After making it clear they are dying anyway and have no reason to lie.
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Andreus LeHane
Gallente Mixed Metaphor
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Posted - 2010.05.12 16:47:00 -
[5]
Edited by: Andreus LeHane on 12/05/2010 16:46:50 Regular sex with attractive men. -----
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Cap Tyrian
Guiding Hand Social Club Dystopia Alliance
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Posted - 2010.05.12 16:52:00 -
[6]
Edited by: Cap Tyrian on 12/05/2010 16:52:27
Originally by: Scarlet Strange See, that's your mistake. You shoot them, make sure they are terminally wounded, and then ask for the truthful answer. After making it clear they are dying anyway and have no reason to lie.
Why would an intellectual tell the truth to the person ho initiated his painful death. At gunpoint is just fine.
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Istvaan Shogaatsu
Caldari Guiding Hand Social Club
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Posted - 2010.05.12 17:04:00 -
[7]
*a confused Slaver hound sails gently, upside-down, through the air in the comm-feed background, waving its paws frantically*
See? I told you I wasn't kidding about the telekinesis.
Maybe... maybe we just weren't meant to go over 100 million SP. Great, now I have another nosebleed.
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Viktor Cage
Caldari Deep Core Mining Inc.
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Posted - 2010.05.12 17:06:00 -
[8]
Could be your tobacco products are being grown in a contaminated environment? Perhaps a change in brand is in order.
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Verone
Gallente Veto Corp
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Posted - 2010.05.12 18:45:00 -
[9]
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu *a confused Slaver hound sails gently, upside-down, through the air in the comm-feed background, waving its paws frantically*
See? I told you I wasn't kidding about the telekinesis.
Maybe... maybe we just weren't meant to go over 100 million SP. Great, now I have another nosebleed.
That's ****ing awesome...
Do a minibar next!
>>> THE LIFE OF AN OUTLAW <<< |
Zarro Starkiler
Caldari Infernus Hypertech
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Posted - 2010.05.12 18:46:00 -
[10]
I see the standards for becoming a pod pilot have again been lowered.
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Nicolai Martov
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Posted - 2010.05.12 19:08:00 -
[11]
Originally by: Zarro Starkiler I see the standards for becoming a pod pilot have again been lowered.
I disagree. Clearly the bar has been raised to require new heights of brain damage and substance abuse.
Originally by: Andreus Lehane Regular sex with attractive men.
Also, three cheers for that idea. Probably not an effective therapy, but certainly a lovely idea all the same.
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Darveses
DAEDALUS X The Star Fraction
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Posted - 2010.05.12 19:15:00 -
[12]
Originally by: Andreus Lehane Regular sex with attractive men.
Ahh...thanks for reminding me why you're awesome. I almost forgot.
--- The Providence Gazetteer Star Fraction YouTube Channel |
De'Veldrin
Minmatar Special Projects Executive The Obsidian Legion
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Posted - 2010.05.13 00:21:00 -
[13]
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu *a confused Slaver hound sails gently, upside-down, through the air in the comm-feed background, waving its paws frantically*
See? I told you I wasn't kidding about the telekinesis.
Maybe... maybe we just weren't meant to go over 100 million SP. Great, now I have another nosebleed.
Frankly, I'd try podding yourself. Let's face it - it clears up every other illness known to man.
You discover you have cancer? Off yourself and wake up in a pristine body that has never known the ravages of the world outside it's clone tube.
And to think that people used to consider that sort of thing immoral. Now it's a modern medical marvel. --Vel
Originally by: Jiseinoku
Mining is the path to enlightement.
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Istvaan Shogaatsu
Caldari Guiding Hand Social Club
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Posted - 2010.05.13 19:43:00 -
[14]
As someone who has made it a business to screw with folks' ability to resurrect, I don't really trust the cloning process. I'm frankly terrified of being podded - no telling if someone got lucky and messed with one of my clones. One moment I take a stupid risk in one of my obscenely expensive frigate-class hot rods, the next thing you know, I'm reborn with no arms, eight legs and an arse for a face, only able to communicate via Brutor throat-singing, and unable to recall the past few decades.
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Elaron
Jericho Fraction The Star Fraction
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Posted - 2010.05.13 21:41:00 -
[15]
There are some who would consider that the result of a typical night of debauchery.
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Jev North
Caldari State Protectorate
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Posted - 2010.05.13 21:56:00 -
[16]
Indeed, some people wake up with an ass for a face every morning.
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Galdrin Shiltok
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Posted - 2010.05.13 22:07:00 -
[17]
I'm more afraid that I'll wake up from my clone and realize It's the wrong sex, seriously talk about awkward.
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Andreus LeHane
Gallente Mixed Metaphor
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Posted - 2010.05.13 22:11:00 -
[18]
Originally by: Jev North Indeed, some people wake up with an ass for a face every morning.
I would remark that most people are generally polite enough not to tell Amarr men the truth about their faces, though. -----
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Sinti Vailatti
Epitoth Fleet Yards Curatores Veritatis Alliance
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Posted - 2010.05.13 23:45:00 -
[19]
Oh, I totally agree with Scarlet!
Like, you spend too much time slotting programs in your head and living in space.
ItÆs like these kids you see who just spend hours if not days at a time in front of a NeoCom playing whatever dreck Kryptik Studios or DDQ or one of those other companies comes out with.
Like they pay a few ISKies a month, (usually their parentÆs money) and they just sit there immersed in a fake world with a meat pocket and a can of Qaffe next to them while the whole galaxy goes to hell in a hand basket around them. What a world of ****ers!
Listen here chummer. Do yourself a favor. Go to the nearest temperate planet with a reasonable gravity. Get out of your ship and start walking. Walk on a beach or in a town or in the country, but put down the chips and step away from the NeoCon!
Maybe, just maybe you might even gain the attention ofàa girl!
If after this, youÆre still experiencing strange discharges and telekinesis then youÆre on your own.
Serving the Dark Amarr |
Galdrin Shiltok
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Posted - 2010.05.14 01:58:00 -
[20]
Man the last time I was out of my pod and had the attention of a girl I woke up 36 hours later handcuff to a station bunk and a billion isk poorer, seriously it just not worth it anymore. You can pleasure yourself just as well as any girl can, heck I have to say the androids are pretty good at it too and a lot cheaper, Yes I am one of those what did those ancient humans call em...oh yes Otaku.
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Istvaan Shogaatsu
Caldari Guiding Hand Social Club
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Posted - 2010.05.21 01:48:00 -
[21]
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
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Kyoko Sakoda
Caldari Veto. Veto Corp
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Posted - 2010.05.21 02:46:00 -
[22]
Better get that looked at, sweetie. Looks painful.
___
Latest video: Future Proof (720p) 2D Animator |
Aria Jenneth
Caldari Kumiho's Smile
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Posted - 2010.05.21 03:09:00 -
[23]
Edited by: Aria Jenneth on 21/05/2010 03:12:07
Originally by: Sinti Vailatti Maybe, just maybe you might even gain the attention ofàa girl!
Ms. Vailatti, you're not ... terribly clear on who this is, are you? Let me bring you up to date.
Istvaan Shogaatsu is the head of the Guiding Hand Social Club and the perpetrator of the most famous heist in New Eden history. His is an organization that (in addition to getting up to its own escapades) honors particularly impressive scam artists, thieves, and infiltrators by inviting them to join the corp for about three seconds, then kicking them out.
That's right. Scale the greatest heights of infamy in New Eden, and you get to be very distantly associated with the fellow. He is Bad People in the sexiest possible way.
He does not need to take time off to meet women.
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Anabella Rella
Minmatar Gradient Electus Matari
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Posted - 2010.05.21 03:49:00 -
[24]
Originally by: Aria Jenneth
Ms. Vailatti, you're not ... terribly clear on who this is, are you?
She regularly uses the word "chummer". Why would you expect her to know anything of one of the greatest conmen in the history of the cluster Pilot Jenneth? What you want is irrelevant. What you've chosen is at hand. |
Aria Jenneth
Caldari Kumiho's Smile
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Posted - 2010.05.21 04:16:00 -
[25]
Edited by: Aria Jenneth on 21/05/2010 04:20:52
Originally by: Anabella Rella She regularly uses the word "chummer". Why would you expect her to know anything of one of the greatest conmen in the history of the cluster Pilot Jenneth?
Is that significant?
I'm afraid I'm not all that familiar with what sort of slang Matari (or Ammatari) of various walks of life use, Ms. Rella. Well, outside the Thukker, anyway. Does "chummer" denote a particularly backward upbringing in some way?
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Celeste Fauconnier
Gallente Lai Dai Infinity Systems
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Posted - 2010.05.21 04:48:00 -
[26]
I apologize for the rather personal question, but have you had a recent buffer sift and purge? While I'm happily quite unaware of the particulars of your skillpack usage, I suspect it might have included the eidetic memory program at an early stage.
I generally find it tedious that I can recall with perfect clarity the details associated with everything I've experienced since installing that damn pack. While I rarely indulge in such recollections, just knowing that the information's lurking in my subconscious and every future moment will join it there ... ah, you poor dear! I can only imagine how much more you must be suffering, if you've not been able to take advantage of the services of a competent cognitive surgeon.
Good luck with finding one who doesn't want to puree your entire brain instead of just straining it through cheesecloth. |
Graelyn
Amarr Deus Imperiosus Acies
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Posted - 2010.05.21 06:33:00 -
[27]
Originally by: Aria Jenneth He does not need to take time off to meet women.
Good Lord. We all need a hobby.
-------
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Freyya
Advanced Planetary Exports Intergalactic Exports Group
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Posted - 2010.05.21 08:41:00 -
[28]
Congratulations on becoming something more than normal capsuleers. However, your body and brain seem malequiped to be able to cope with it. Sometimes that happens, nature and all.
I suggest you will have to be podded with an out of date clone to aleviate some of the neurological pressure your sizable brain is performing. Lose some of that mass and then you can start over again..Perhaps it's just a clone that's a little bit malfunctioning and a fresh one will clear up any issues... ___________
NOW COLLECTING ISD AND CCP AUTOGRAPHS It'll be worth something someday. -Rauth
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Shikobo Nonu
Minmatar
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Posted - 2010.05.21 08:51:00 -
[29]
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Can I have some of that booster you're abusing? It looks and sounds like a fun trip.
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Anabella Rella
Minmatar Gradient Electus Matari
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Posted - 2010.05.21 16:01:00 -
[30]
Originally by: Aria Jenneth Edited by: Aria Jenneth on 21/05/2010 04:20:52
Originally by: Anabella Rella She regularly uses the word "chummer". Why would you expect her to know anything of one of the greatest conmen in the history of the cluster Pilot Jenneth?
Is that significant?
I'm afraid I'm not all that familiar with what sort of slang Matari (or Ammatari) of various walks of life use, Ms. Rella. Well, outside the Thukker, anyway. Does "chummer" denote a particularly backward upbringing in some way?
Apparently Ammatar slang for "friend" and yes, indicates a very...shall we say, provincial...education and world view. What you want is irrelevant. What you've chosen is at hand. |
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