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Ozone71
Caldari Kamikaze Fleet Command
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Posted - 2010.06.14 01:22:00 -
[1]
There is no clone of Chuck Norris
If you ever see a Chuck Norris clone - its the same Chuck, he just moves too fast for you
Chuck Norris is immunie to Interdiction - there is no stopping Chuck
Chuck Norris CAN rip apart civilian mining lasers and recycle them
CONCORD pays Chuck a montly fee to operate in his Universe
Before Chuck Norris, there were no shattered planets
Wormholes exist where Chuck Norris missed a target and hit empty space
Chuck Norris never misses
The above two statements are both true because Chuck says they are
Chuck Norris needs no Pod
Chuck Norris has a standing of 10 with everyone ... except Caldari...even Chuck hates Caldari
Chuck Norris can mine an ice asteroid until it pops ...He could, he just wouldn't because Chuck thinks mining is for wimps ....unless you are using a pick axe .....but Chuck mines with his bare hands
Chuck Norris can Compress Compressed Ore
Why is Chuck Norris so mad? ... Because of Falcon
Chuck Norris IS a blockade runner
Chuck Norris is Cap Stable
Chuck Norris has 4 high slots .. 2 hands .. 2 feet
The "All V's" option in EFT is actually Chuck Norris "Ozone is blue and smells faintly of geraniums." (Qi, BBC TV) |
Ozone71
Caldari Kamikaze Fleet Command
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Posted - 2010.06.14 01:29:00 -
[2]
Chuck Norris can train skills to Level VI.
No matter what system Chuck is in, that system is High Sec. "Ozone is blue and smells faintly of geraniums." (Qi, BBC TV) |
Whitehound
The Whitehound Corporation
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Posted - 2010.06.14 06:32:00 -
[3]
Edited by: Whitehound on 14/06/2010 06:36:51 Chuck Norris can fit weapons in mid-slots.
Chuck Norris gets a bonus to hull tanking. --
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Blane Xero
Amarr The Firestorm Cartel
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Posted - 2010.06.14 06:42:00 -
[4]
Chuck norris killed a Polaris Legatus Frigate. Twice. _____________________________________ Haruhiist since December 2008
Originally by: CCP Fallout Been there. Done that. Need antibiotics.
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Epegi Givo
Amarr Solstice Horizon
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Posted - 2010.06.14 06:52:00 -
[5]
m0o used to be a big pirate organization in lowsec. Then they met Chuck Norris. __________________________
My other alt is A Ferrari |
Ozone71
Caldari Kamikaze Fleet Command
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Posted - 2010.06.14 07:47:00 -
[6]
Chuck Norris can fit a weapon on to a freighter - himself as pilot.
Chuck Norris cares not for DPS, his alpha strike is always enough.
Chuck Norris wants to walk in stations ... so he can kick more a**
Chuck can fly a Dreadnaught in High sec - even a Rookie ship is considered a Dread if Chuck pilots
Chuck never fits modules to a ship, he just warps in, ejects and fights you hand to hand.
Chuck took on a Dreadnaught once in 1v1 PVP ... he punched it so hard it now thinks its a Hulk called 'Veldnaught'. "Ozone is blue and smells faintly of geraniums." (Qi, BBC TV) |
Dan O'Connor
Cerberus Network Dignitas.
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Posted - 2010.06.14 10:58:00 -
[7]
Chuck Norris once bet CONCORD he could survive a stargate jump without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 107, a naked Chuck Norris approached the stargate in Perimeter, activated it and jumped into Jita - the jump flash visible in 3 systems, reaching speeds up to 100 AU per second and temperatures of 10,000 degrees. An embarrassed CONCORD publicly claimed it was a stargate malfunction, and still owes him a Quafe.
Apply | Sigs
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Reptail
Caldari Cool Rampage Amongst Zeus 1
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Posted - 2010.06.14 11:02:00 -
[8]
Chuck Norris met Reptail, Chuck Dies. End of story.
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Ozone71
Caldari Kamikaze Fleet Command
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Posted - 2010.06.14 11:36:00 -
[9]
Originally by: Reptail Chuck Norris met Reptail, Chuck Dies.
...laughing "Ozone is blue and smells faintly of geraniums." (Qi, BBC TV) |
Dan O'Connor
Cerberus Network Dignitas.
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Posted - 2010.06.14 12:41:00 -
[10]
Once, Chuck Norris ordered a Thorax from the Caldari State... and got one.
Apply | Sigs
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Khraunus
Amarr Black Forest Operatives Immortalis Militis Invictus
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Posted - 2010.06.14 20:55:00 -
[11]
The fastest U-turn in eve history was recorded on July 18, 2008 when Concord realized they were warping towards Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not warp; Stations and stargates are built around him. Most importantly, how are you supposed to tell whether this is part of my post or my signature? |
Zedic
Amarr Universalis Imperium
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Posted - 2010.06.14 21:34:00 -
[12]
I hate this meme and I hate chuck norris. What an 'effin dooosh.
"Zedic, would probably, somehow, make it all blow up." - Akima |
Simeon Tor
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Posted - 2010.06.14 21:36:00 -
[13]
Originally by: Zedic I hate this meme and I hate chuck norris. What an 'effin dooosh.
FINALLY! Someone who agrees with me!
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yfz3r0
Caldari Perkone
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Posted - 2010.06.14 22:12:00 -
[14]
Originally by: Simeon Tor
Originally by: Zedic I hate this meme and I hate chuck norris. What an 'effin dooosh.
FINALLY! Someone who agrees with me!
Make that 2 people. We don't speak that man's name anymore. See reason below:
Chuck Norris AKA Ned Flanders
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Thuranni
The Dark Space Initiative Revival Of The Talocan Empire
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Posted - 2010.06.14 22:14:00 -
[15]
This **** was funny briefly in 2003.
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Zions Child
Caldari Carthage Industries
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Posted - 2010.06.14 22:19:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Zedic I hate this meme and I hate chuck norris. What an 'effin dooosh.
/signed
Also, since when did OOPE become the Barrens chat of WoW?
Whats next, dead baby EVE jokes?
Originally by: CCP Shadow *snip* Castration successful. Shadow.
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So Sensational
GREY COUNCIL Gentlemen's Club
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Posted - 2010.06.14 22:51:00 -
[17]
Originally by: Zions Child
Originally by: Zedic
Also, since when did OOPE become the Barrens chat of WoW?
Whats next, dead baby EVE jokes?
What's worse than a dishonest pirate? A baby with a full-grown fontanelle.
What's the difference between a baby and a rifter? After being beat up day after day the rifter still functions with a bit of duct tape repairs, I can't say the same for babies.
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Zivoril
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Posted - 2010.06.15 01:36:00 -
[18]
All I can add is Bruce Lee beats Chuck.
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Whitehound
The Whitehound Corporation
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Posted - 2010.06.15 08:47:00 -
[19]
Originally by: Zivoril All I can add is Bruce Lee beats Chuck.
Bruce Lee beats Iron Man! --
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Dan O'Connor
Cerberus Network Dignitas.
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Posted - 2010.06.15 15:54:00 -
[20]
Chuck Norris is the only person known to man who can, in fact, refine refined minerals.
Chuck Norris CAN do PI in Jita.
Chuck Norris does it in a Kestrel. All of it.
Apply | Sigs
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Exploding Tukey
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Posted - 2010.06.15 16:18:00 -
[21]
Chuck Norris uses corpses as ammo. He never runs out.
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Dan O'Connor
Cerberus Network Dignitas.
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Posted - 2010.06.15 17:04:00 -
[22]
Chuck Norris does not pay taxes. If the CEO asks him to do so he only EVEMails him a link with an image of him, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck never had to pay corp taxes, ever.
Apply | Sigs
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Jim McGregor
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Posted - 2010.06.16 17:33:00 -
[23]
Edited by: Jim McGregor on 16/06/2010 17:38:51
--
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Nali Kceb
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Posted - 2010.06.21 22:34:00 -
[24]
Edited by: Nali Kceb on 21/06/2010 22:36:27 I have some too:
There is no "deadly Jovian disease" Chuck Norris didn't like most Jovians.
Chuck Norris solo killed a Titan, in his pod.
The most challenging thing Chuck ever did on EVE was holding a veldspar mining content with Chirriba and his alts. Again he was in his pod, it was that challenging since he was 55 minutes to late.(the content lasted 1 hour).
Chuck Norris never updates his clone, nobody can kill Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can copy BPC's, That's where BPO's come from.
There are 5 damage types in eve: Thermal, kinetic, explosive, EM and Chuck Norris.
Not all Chuck Norris his skills are lvl 5, some are higher.
If you have 1m isk and Chuck Norris has 1m isk Chuck Norris has more isk than you.
The design for the titan avatar is rumoured to be based on a certain part of Chuck Norris body.
The Apocrypha wormholes opening is the result of Chuck Norris sneezing.
Chuck Norris don't need skill books, he writes them.
Chuck Norris doesn't get concorded, concord gets Chuck Norrised!
Chuck Norris can destroy a pos in reinforcement mode.
Chuck Norris has allot of chars every time he plays out eve he starts a new char.
Chuck Norris don't need stargates, he can create a wh to everywhere by roundhouse kicking space!
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Dan O'Connor
Cerberus Network Dignitas.
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Posted - 2010.06.22 00:18:00 -
[25]
Edited by: Dan O''Connor on 22/06/2010 00:18:58 In 106, Chuck Norris did 12 jumps for a 23 jump route, falling short of his personal best by 3 jumps.
In the rare occurence that Chuck ever does mine, he mines Tritanium and refines it to Dense Veldspar.
If one could actually harness the energy released by Chuck Norris' Pod for 1 hour, it could power all stargates in the vincinity of about 10 lightyears, for 6 months - even without requiring being near a star.
CONCORD has forbidden to allow a clone of Chuck Norris, as their scientists might be afraid that Chuck would find a way to release his clone without Pod-kill, and if both their pods were to collide in space, it could literally mean the end of New Eden.
Sigs
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Gistatis Tribunus
The Unknown Bar and Pub
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Posted - 2010.06.22 00:42:00 -
[26]
Chuck Norris kills himself whenever he hears these jokes. Chuck can't die though, so his alternative is throwing cinderblocks around the world at 10000km/h and repeatedly hitting himself in the face with said blocks, killing 100 people each block thrown.
Time Flux Detected You are going too fast! Wait five minutes and try again. |
Epegi Givo
Amarr Solstice Horizon
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Posted - 2010.06.22 01:47:00 -
[27]
As the final, key part of their construction, A hair of Chuck Norris is stroked against a CONCORD ship, imbuing it with all the power it has.
We do not fear Earth because of their far superior technology, we fear Earth because Chuck Norris is there. __________________________
My other alt is A Ferrari |
Herzog Wolfhammer
Gallente Aliastra
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Posted - 2010.06.22 02:50:00 -
[28]
No not this. I would rather be Rickrolled.
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