Pages: [1] :: one page |
|
Author |
Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 0 post(s) |
Signal11th
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 13:04:00 -
[1]
Just thought I would start a thread on the hassles of being in IT support. Some of the humorous answer's I have had from talking the customers. These are legit from my own experience so if you post please make them legit ones not the urban myths ones we all hear.
Q: So what have you got on your desktop? A: Err, a pad and some paperclips......
Q: What Windows do you have? A: Doubleglazed....(this one from last week)
Q: When did you say you received the email? A: January 12th 1972 Q: 1972?? A: Err yes which was funny as I hadn't been born then! Q: Have you checked your date and time? A: Ahhhh thanks alot!
Q: I cannot get connected using my VPN connection. A: Ok can you log me in remotely, go to "website" and click on remote support please? Q: Ahh I can't I have no internet at the moment.
And my personal favorite from when I was a travelling engineer goes to a certain Goverment office in Newcastle-Upon-Tyne.
I had a call from them saying that when they printed out an order there was a red smudge appearing on the paper. So I travel fours hours to get there just to find a mouthful of jam doughnut underneath one of the rollers. Obviously everyone denied knowing anything about it!!
|
SirSpectre
Gallente Harbingers Of Destruction
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 15:57:00 -
[2]
Edited by: SirSpectre on 07/03/2011 15:58:11 Few of my Personal favorites I've gotten
Me Q: Can you click this link I sent you in your email? User A: (hospital nurse) How do I click a link?
User: My monitor won't turn on. Me: What color are your lights on it? User: um...White I guess..kinda long. Hidden behind glass Me: What? On the monitor? User: OH! The monitor lights! I was looking at the office lights ----
Sig here. ---> X |
Pr1ncess Alia
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 16:22:00 -
[3]
I do IP networking support for global isp and tier 1 provider.
Most the people I talk to are (allegedly) accomplished engineers and professionals. I can barely handle the idiocy and incompetence I face every day from these people.
If I did end user IT support I'd probably just kill myself. I'd like to think I'd just get another job but worst case scenario I'd blow my brains out.
--- Players are losing faith and loyalty in CCP due previous expansions not living up to player expectations. The CSM and CCP agreed that expectation management can be improved |
Vogue
Short Bus Pole Dancers
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 20:14:00 -
[4]
IT support is not really that stressful 95% of the time. It can be when a external provider has a fault - such as your corporate ISP. Then you are p*****g in the wind.
Though when I started in IT I was supporting Windows 9x desktop that had Novell Clients that mixed AD and Novell. It was like playing kerplunk.
What is most stressful in IT is managing the transition from old systems to new systems. It is easier to get rid of a director in a company than a decrepit old system that is critical to business operation.
.................................................. Coming soon politico trollatron V3.0 - With higher yield truth ¬
|
Lutz Major
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 21:19:00 -
[5]
"Bastard Operator from Hell"
A must read for everyone in IT support!
|
Barakkus
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 21:35:00 -
[6]
Edited by: Barakkus on 07/03/2011 21:36:36
Originally by: Vogue
Though when I started in IT I was supporting Windows 9x desktop that had Novell Clients that mixed AD and Novell. It was like playing kerplunk.
Groupwise ftw! lol When I started where I'm at it was Novell/NT4 lol.
I think the thing that drives me nuts the most is getting support tickets that say "xxx is broken, thanks", or "I got an error message, please fix, thanks", then spending an hour trying to pry what the problem is exactly out of someone. Usually filled with "Oh I don't know what it said, I just clicked OK."
Typical Day At the Office (I showed this to one of the network guys and I've been seeing tickets with "I rebooted 3 times too..." in them lol) - - [SERVICE] Corp Standings For POS anchoring
|
NIJofleyUK
Gallente Incidental Damage -Mostly Harmless-
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 21:51:00 -
[7]
Phone system Tech for a software PBX.
Q: OK, So is there any text on the display of your phone? A: No its blank, its very hard to see if there is anything on it.
Q: Why's that? A: We had a power cut 15 mins ago.
(Feeling sorry for her stupidity)
Q: Just so you know my dear, your Phone system relys on Electricity. Once the power comes back on... As if by Magic, your phone system will start working after 30-50 seconds. A: Oh Really.... That wasn't in the original tender for the phone system!!!
(Kinda getting the feeling that Tesla Electricity actually exists as a theory in this clients mind)
Ahh well... to be a tech requires a certain amount of PATIENCE and a damned thick skin!! Or I would have became a serial killer by now!
Kudos tho to the really thick people tho that you can wind up a little and then spring the joke on them.... Tact required!! Be Warned!! ZOMG.... I Dont Believe IT!! |
nahtoh
Caldari Brotherhood of The Saltire R-I-P
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 23:52:00 -
[8]
ISP support here,
Number 1 Muppet. Why is my dial up not working? and hurry up I am calling from a phone box!!!!
Me. Can I ask why your calling from a phonebox?
Muppet. BT cut off my landline for not paying my bill, but thats not important!!!! I need my internet!!!!
Me. Well that will be why your getting no dial tone.
Muppet. But I paid you!!!!
Me. You need to pay them as well...
Muppet. Why is my internet not working I paid you!!!!!
(q about 15 mins of back and forth) sigh...
Then there was the email exchange about someone saying they were dialing into a UK ISP 0845 number from canada and wanting us to pay for it.
Muppets point "it did not say on the site that it was UK only!!!!!!" ========= "I am not saying there should be capital punishment for stupidity, but why can`t we just take the safety labels off everything and let the problem fix its self |
Salyan
Twilight Sparkle Fan Club
|
Posted - 2011.03.07 23:58:00 -
[9]
At my first job running around and upgrading peoples' desktops and laptops:
Me: Ok, the new laptop is all set up; all of your data has been transferred and all the apps you had on the old one are installed. Can you test it out to make sure everything is working for you? Office lady: Well... How would I know?
The next day, I do the same for another lady and she replies with:
Her: "Well, I am missing my buildings!!!" Me: "Buildings?" *Takes a few minutes for it to become clear that she is talking about an icon on her desktop that looked like a picture of buildings* Me: "Ok, well, what application was it?" Her: "What?" Me: "...What was the name of the app that had the building icon?" Her: "... I don't know" Me: "Ok, what did it do?" Her: "... I don't know, but I need it to work!"
After a few minutes we get one of her coworkers to show me what the "buildings" icon looks like. Her new computer has that app - but it is a newer version with an fancier icon that she didn't recognize...
|
Barakkus
|
Posted - 2011.03.08 00:00:00 -
[10]
I got fired from an ISP back in 1997 because I lost it on a guy who kept calling but refused to tell me the settings he had setup for his dial up networking ****. I think I got his call like 5 times in a row and he just wanted to yell at someone so I basically told him to **** off in an epic sort of way and hung up on him. He turned out to be friends with one of the *******s that were running the company lol. - - [SERVICE] Corp Standings For POS anchoring
|
|
Master Gotama
|
Posted - 2011.03.08 05:12:00 -
[11]
say what you will about the end user, but this is what i have to deal with whenever i call for IT support.
|
Deviana Sevidon
Gallente Panta-Rhei Butterfly Effect Alliance
|
Posted - 2011.03.08 08:27:00 -
[12]
The worst customer call I ever had were a few years ago when I worked at another company. Basically she complained about her Antivirus-Software and wanted it removed. The reason was, that the software (legit software, no scareware) notified the customer with pop-up windows about malware found on her PC. The malware was quite persistent and the AV could detect but not completely remove the problem.
That was the situation when the customer called, but this cow in her infinite stupidity insisted in having the antivirus-software removed, because the malware threat alerts annoyed her.
Quote: Disclaimer: All mentioned above contains my opinion and is therefore an absolute truth (for me anyway, my universe, muhahaha.....ok, done
|
Sidus Isaacs
Gallente
|
Posted - 2011.03.08 12:08:00 -
[13]
I usually have more of a problem calling IT support since I know more about the topic at hand then they do (and I only call once I know there is no issue on my side), and when I try and explain, all they do is tell me to reboot and nothing is solved :/ --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://desusig.crumplecorn.com/sigs.html |
Reiisha
EVE University
|
Posted - 2011.03.08 16:09:00 -
[14]
Recently started working in tech support...
Q: I can't send emails! A: Apparently the email server crashed. I rebooted it, should work now.
Automated response: Cannot send ticket update, email server crashed.
"If you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all"
|
Mister Rocknrolla
|
Posted - 2011.03.08 16:13:00 -
[15]
I prefer completely unknowledgeable users over the "self-trained, I setup my network at home" types. I work with a lot of restaurants, and for the most part they're happy to hand over full control at the smallest hiccup. I hate the calls that start with "The problem started about a week ago, so Justin (high school kid who washes dishes) said he could help."
One time someone was having problems and rather than risk having to pay for a service call, chose to have a customer from the bar "take a look." Manager returns 30 minutes later to find guy gone and server in a dozen pieces on the office floor.
Or the calls that start with "I don't know...it just stopped working." are usually full of **** Tracy type investigation. One guy says the computer stopped working "for no reason.". Finally send a tech on-site. Tech asks the guy about all of the plastic tarps in the office. Guy says they had a pipe burst day before yesterday and things were just drying out. This was the first chance they had to use the computer and that's when they noticed it wasn't working "for some reason."
But, as my wife says: "90% of tech support seems to consist of 'Turn it off and back on.'" and she's right, so these interesting calls make the job fun.
|
Kryschek
|
Posted - 2011.03.09 17:27:00 -
[16]
I work in the data encryption field for mobile devices.
We mostly deal with competent technicians but sometimes we get people who seem to have received their degrees from a box of Cracker Jacks.
A couple my favorites are like this.
In order to perform decryptions on some systems, we have to have the assisting technician use a recovery file placed on a bootable CD. Once the recovery is complete, the technician simply needs to remove the CD and re-start the system.
Several times we've received calls stating that the program is still on the system until we tell them to remove the CD from the tray and re-start the computer.
My second favorite is when a tech contacted me asking me to remove the data encryption software from a system that did not have it's HDD in it! They guy honestly thought he would be able to harvest information from a system without a brain!
|
jason hill
Caldari Clan Shadow Wolf Fatal Ascension
|
Posted - 2011.03.09 20:30:00 -
[17]
Edited by: jason hill on 09/03/2011 20:33:49 alas ...theres too many to mention one that does spring to mind in the 90`s ..user logs a call "printer not working!worked ok yesterday. "IMPORTANT DOCUMENTS TO BE PRINTED" its a new printer utmost importance an engineer site visit needed ........ i travel half to the other side of london from berkshire to .........put paper into the paper tray ... suffice to say the dept was sent the bill.funnily they never logged another request for months .... untill the ink ran out .ho hum
destroy everything you touch |
LegitGuy WithCandy
Caldari Serious Legitimate Hauling and Trade Corporation
|
Posted - 2011.03.09 21:09:00 -
[18]
Originally by: Master Gotama say what you will about the end user, but this is what i have to deal with whenever i call for IT support.
Quite user, you only speak when spoken to.
|
Odarin
Dark Nebula Gallente Division Dark Nebula Galactic Empire
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 04:55:00 -
[19]
I do level 2/3 support... got this in an email one day...
/facepalm ____________________________________________ \\DNGD Director á\\DANGR Contact
|
Alonzo Harris
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 08:38:00 -
[20]
http://notalwaysright.com/
|
|
Alotta Baggage
Amarr Imperial Manufactorum Armada Assail
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 08:57:00 -
[21]
Originally by: LegitGuy WithCandy
Originally by: Master Gotama say what you will about the end user, but this is what i have to deal with whenever i call for IT support.
Quite user, you only speak when spoken to.
I think you mean 'quiet...' hit this guy with a paradox and his head might explode
Originally by: Valkoinen Heteromies
I for one would love to be able to walk on stations and fly spaceships in the body of a little cute catgirl!
|
Vampirella Becker
Gallente Viborg Odyssey IT Alliance
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 09:40:00 -
[22]
Edited by: Vampirella Becker on 10/03/2011 09:41:53 "My coffee holder is broken." "Your what?" "... you know, the holder that pops out when you push the button on the front of the computer" "!!" -- my favorite.
|
Toshiro GreyHawk
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 10:06:00 -
[23]
I'm a retried Sys Admin ... so I dealt with things both ways - users we provided services to and net work people and such who provided service to us.
My experience was that most people were competent at their job - otherwise - they wouldn't have it. They just weren't competent at my job - which was why I was doing it.
So I always tried to treat people with respect and courtesy ... even vendors ... even if I knew just what they were trying to pull ... and cursed them up one side and down the other (which my time in the Marines taught me how to do on an epic level) once I hung up.
A few things helped there:
1) The knowledge that Burning Bridges - didn't help things - I could easily have to work with that person again.
2) The person I was dealing with - probably did not create the policy that was causing me a problem and had no power to change it.
3) Learning to tell where I could make a difference - and where I couldn't - as well as learning NOT TO CARE once I had done all that I could do. (That was really hard but over the years I managed to do it).
Basically - it was all about getting things done - and I left my ego at the door.
The thing was - often - either I could not have done that other persons job - or sure as hell wouldn't want to - so I just treated them with respect (either for expertise I didn't share - or the **** they lived with every day) and tried to work the problem.
Scott Adams in The Dilbert Principle said:
Quote:
Including me. Everyone is an idiot, not just the people with low SAT scores. The only differences among us is that we're idiots about different things at different times. No matter how smart you are, you spend much of your day being an idiot.
Which I have found to be almost universally true.
So - when I had people who were otherwise brilliant scientists ask me to do mind bogglingly stupid things - I kept that in mind.
Of course - that didn't mean that I wasn't acquainted with brain dead, back stabbing, ego maniacal, mother ****ing ass holes - 'cause I was, it's just that you get that everywhere. Before I got my tech job I worked in several other fields and had the same things there.
The real problem - isn't the stuff - it's the people using it. So ... I always saw my job as a Sys Admin to be partially an educational one. I wasn't going to turn everyone into a techy ... but the more they knew - the more educated explanations I got from them when they had a problem.
I usually try to refrain from discussing anything specifically associated with any of my employers so ... I'll not be adding any stories at this time as ... those would be specifics ... but I have been part of more monumental screw ups than I even want to think about ... and a lot of those were involving some very intelligent people ... just not so intelligent about the thing they happened to be ****ing up at the moment ...
But - no matter how bad things got - all I had to do was look back at some of the other things I had done and bless the day I got hired to do technical work. Since the problem was always the people - the less I had to do with people - the ****ing better. The thing is - no one can get away from that entirely ... so when you do have to deal with other people ... do it professionally and with a kind thought in your heart (if they aren't ass holes) or at least a forced smile on your face (if they are).
For dealing with Ass Holes - I generally applied the knowledge I had gained in the Marines. I would look at said ass hole and think, "I'm only going to have to deal with this ****ing ass hole for X amount of time - but they - are going to have to deal with their-****ing-selves for the rest of their ass hole existence - so - I've got the better deal."
*shrug*
.
Orbiting vs. Kiting Faction Schools |
Vogue
Short Bus Pole Dancers
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 12:19:00 -
[24]
Edited by: Vogue on 10/03/2011 12:22:14 The best IT departments are those where the team is routing for each other. With no petty internecine wars going on. Including skilled IT workers who guard their own mole hill and skill base.
A lot of my IT jobs were as an IT contractor. I made an effort to get the users on side and be willing to do any task for my IT department that my skill set allowed. With IT support you will go far if you are actually honest about some issues you that can't provide an immediate response for.
A lot of IT departments claim they are short of money but yet maintain support contracts with external providers that are not that necessary costing hundreds of thousands of ú\$ a year. |
Barakkus
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 16:42:00 -
[25]
I've found web developers are even worse than end users a lot of the time.
I've been following a an email chain the past few days from the account staff and the web developers regarding a new set of pages put into production recently. Today I see an email "xxx is not a valid code, maybe we should make an enhancement to validate what is entered on the page with the lookup tables in the database"
/facepalm - - [SERVICE] Corp Standings For POS anchoring
|
Master Gotama
|
Posted - 2011.03.10 22:01:00 -
[26]
Originally by: LegitGuy WithCandy
Originally by: Master Gotama say what you will about the end user, but this is what i have to deal with whenever i call for IT support.
Quite user, you only speak when spoken to.
hehe, actually you're quite right. i've already been lectured once about speaking to the "help".
|
Mire Stoude
The Undesirables
|
Posted - 2011.03.11 03:51:00 -
[27]
These topics always degenerate because people get offended when they find out Tech/IT Support makes fun of them. It goes both ways really. I know for a fact that when I make a mistake (or even if I don't) an unhappy customer is going to make some comment about the mistake and vocalize his perception of my intelligence to his acquaintances (SEE ME USE BIG WORDS?!).
That being said, I remember one call (paraphrased of course): - CUSTOMER: I can't get online. - ME: What lights are on your modem? - CUSTOMER: (after a long period of silence) Let me ask you something. Do you need power to have internet?
|
Kazuo Ishiguro
House of Marbles
|
Posted - 2011.03.11 20:24:00 -
[28]
Originally by: Vogue The best IT departments are those where the team is routing for each other.
Freudian slip? --- 34.4:1 mineral compression |
Vogue
Short Bus Pole Dancers
|
Posted - 2011.03.11 20:38:00 -
[29]
Nah I just have atrocious grammar
..................................................
|
|
|
|
Pages: [1] :: one page |
First page | Previous page | Next page | Last page |