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Muad 'dib
The Imperial Fedaykin
Amarrian Commandos
1166
   |
Posted - 2013.06.27 14:45:00 -
[1] - Quote
After a few very amusing chats on voice comms recently something that has proved colourful and entertaining is adapting existing and creating new, EvE related your momma jokes.
Some favorites so far:
Your mommas so fat that she cant use jump gates
Your mommas so fat that shes all you can see on D-Scan
Your mommas so fat that TiDi starts with only her in system
Your mommas so stupid after putting in a set of +5s her intelligence was still -1
*Please bare in mind that these jokes are a work of fiction and only apply to ingame personality's. Characters, places and incidents either are products of the authorGÇÖs imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to anyone's actual mother or locales, living or dead, is entirely coincidental*
Cosmic signature detected. . . .
http://i.imgur.com/Z7NfIS6.jpg
I got 99 likes, and this post aint one.
|
Mizhir
Red Federation
RvB - RED Federation
25969
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 14:49:00 -
[2] - Quote
Funny
This thread does show up once in a while 
Can't really remember any good ones though
We will never forget you Saede!
I bet you dont see things like this so often in EVE |
Emergent Game Play
State War Academy
Caldari State
2
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 15:16:00 -
[3] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat they use her to collapse U574s.
Yo momma's so fat, Supercaps dock in her ass crack.
etc... |
Kirjava
Lothian Enterprises
23148
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 16:02:00 -
[4] - Quote
An old one.
Yo mommas ass so fat, BoB invaded and set up pets in her ass crack!
Haruhiists - Overloading Out of Pod discussions since 2007.
/S¦¦GùòGÇ+GÇ+GùòS¦¦\
Unban Saede! |
Anubis Joringer
Hot Caldari Babes
19
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 16:05:00 -
[5] - Quote
Only one I can think of is "Yo mama's so fat it takes Caldari Freighter V just to drive her down the street." |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
269
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 17:16:00 -
[6] - Quote
I'm not gonna say yo momma's fat, but she does have her own customs office.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
4757
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 17:28:00 -
[7] - Quote
Yo mommas so fat, she needs s cyno to get to the kitchen.
Yo mommas so fat, goons are mining her for Tech.
Yo mommas so fat, she appears on EVERYONES overview.
Yo mommas so old the sleepers reverse engineer HER.
Yo momma is so big it takes a jumpgate network to put her belt on.
Yo momma so fat jita docks in her.
Yo momma so old that when she came to new eden, the evegate collapsed behind her.
Yo momma is so fat that people drop her on PL titans.
Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings? |
Zimmy Zeta
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
24072
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 18:22:00 -
[8] - Quote
Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:Yo mommas so fat, she needs s cyno to get to the kitchen.
Yo mommas so fat, goons are mining her for Tech.
Yo mommas so fat, she appears on EVERYONES overview.
Yo mommas so old the sleepers reverse engineer HER.
Yo momma is so big it takes a jumpgate network to put her belt on.
Yo momma so fat jita docks in her.
Yo momma so old that when she came to new eden, the evegate collapsed behind her.
Yo momma is so fat that people drop her on PL titans.
Sadly, all this doesn't keep yo momma from wearing yoga pants 
Just think of how bad an average post by me is, and then realize half of them are even worse |
Random McNally
Red Federation
RvB - RED Federation
19209
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 21:12:00 -
[9] - Quote
Zimmy Zeta wrote:Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:Yo mommas so fat, she needs s cyno to get to the kitchen.
Yo mommas so fat, goons are mining her for Tech.
Yo mommas so fat, she appears on EVERYONES overview.
Yo mommas so old the sleepers reverse engineer HER.
Yo momma is so big it takes a jumpgate network to put her belt on.
Yo momma so fat jita docks in her.
Yo momma so old that when she came to new eden, the evegate collapsed behind her.
Yo momma is so fat that people drop her on PL titans. Sadly, all this doesn't keep yo momma from wearing yoga pants
Oh, there's a mental image I cannot bleach out. 
Red Fed Grunt.-á Co-Host of the High Drag Podcast. http://highdrag.wordpress.com/
UNBAN SAEDE!-á ALICE SAKI FOR OOPE MODERATOR!-á Make it so! |
Micheal Dietrich
Kings Gambit Black
1961
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 21:32:00 -
[10] - Quote
Random McNally wrote:Zimmy Zeta wrote:Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:Yo mommas so fat, she needs s cyno to get to the kitchen.
Yo mommas so fat, goons are mining her for Tech.
Yo mommas so fat, she appears on EVERYONES overview.
Yo mommas so old the sleepers reverse engineer HER.
Yo momma is so big it takes a jumpgate network to put her belt on.
Yo momma so fat jita docks in her.
Yo momma so old that when she came to new eden, the evegate collapsed behind her.
Yo momma is so fat that people drop her on PL titans. Sadly, all this doesn't keep yo momma from wearing yoga pants Oh, there's a mental image I cannot bleach out.
sweaty down the middle yoga pants.
That image really is burned in my mind, for over a decade now.
Out of Pod is getting In the Pod - Join in game channel IG OOPE |
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
4764
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 21:40:00 -
[11] - Quote
Micheal Dietrich wrote:Random McNally wrote:Zimmy Zeta wrote:Sadly, all this doesn't keep yo momma from wearing yoga pants Oh, there's a mental image I cannot bleach out. sweaty down the middle yoga pants. That image really is burned in my mind, for over a decade now.
One too many trips to the bunk over it eh? 
Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings? |
Micheal Dietrich
Kings Gambit Black
1961
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 21:53:00 -
[12] - Quote
Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:Micheal Dietrich wrote:Random McNally wrote:Zimmy Zeta wrote:Sadly, all this doesn't keep yo momma from wearing yoga pants Oh, there's a mental image I cannot bleach out. sweaty down the middle yoga pants. That image really is burned in my mind, for over a decade now. One too many trips to the can over it eh?
fix'd
Out of Pod is getting In the Pod - Join in game channel IG OOPE |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
270
|
Posted - 2013.06.27 21:56:00 -
[13] - Quote
Yo momma is so ugly the best the plastic surgeon could do was make her look like a Moa.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Indahmawar Fazmarai
2485
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 06:45:00 -
[14] - Quote
Yo momma so fat that she doesn't warps, the universe warps around her.
Yo momma so fat she doesn't hotdrops on grid, the grid is hotdropped on her.
Our logs show nothing, yo momma so fungry she ate them.
Yo momma so old she was old before before Soon started.
Yo momma so borked that CCP chose to iterate EVE instead of her.
The Greater Fool Bar-áis now open for business, 24/7. Come and have drinks and fun somewhere between RL and New Eden!-áIngame chat channel: The Greater Fool Bar |
Samoth Egnoled
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
20051
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 06:49:00 -
[15] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat, i had to take 3 jumps in a Carrier to get on her good side!
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
-Winston ChurchillGäó |
Adunh Slavy
1055
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 14:14:00 -
[16] - Quote
Yo mamma so fat that when the FC tells her to haul ass, she has to make two trips, in a charon. |
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
4780
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 17:04:00 -
[17] - Quote
Yo momma is so fat that there is a DUST battle going on in her navel.
Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings? |
Zimmy Zeta
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
24147
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 18:45:00 -
[18] - Quote
Samoth Egnoled wrote:Yo momma's so fat, i had to take 3 jumps in a Carrier to get on her good side!
SAMOTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU ARE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!
*glomp*
Now report to LAGL immediately, don't leave your loyal fanbase hanging.
Just think of how bad an average post by me is, and then realize half of them are even worse |
Totalrx
NA No Assholes
106
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 19:36:00 -
[19] - Quote
Your momma so fat, when she bumped a Hulk - she broke it. |
Feanira Darr
Perkone
Caldari State
9
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 19:52:00 -
[20] - Quote
I undocked and saw this http://i.imgur.com/9BvqDK3.jpg
"Tibus Heth could also benefit from working 'The Plan'." -DMC |
Khergit Deserters
Crom's Angels
1259
|
Posted - 2013.06.28 21:26:00 -
[21] - Quote
Your momma's such a ho, when she has a party, they call it "Mommageddon." |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
275
|
Posted - 2013.06.29 02:20:00 -
[22] - Quote
Yo momma's so ugly that one glance at her made the whole Jovian race want to die.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Feanira Darr
Perkone
Caldari State
11
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 11:42:00 -
[23] - Quote
Ila Dace wrote:Yo momma's so ugly that one glance at her made the whole Jovian race want to die.
favorite
"Tibus Heth could also benefit from working 'The Plan'." -DMC |
Liafcipe9000
Smeghead Empire
6772
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 11:46:00 -
[24] - Quote
Ila Dace wrote:Yo momma is so ugly the best the plastic surgeon could do was make her look like a Moa.
yo mama IS a Moa 
You may gain the knowledge, but you will lose your belief, with all its mystery and comfort. If there was proof, absolute and certain, there is an afterlife, why not quit this life, and be done with it?
Ponder about these things all your life, and you're a philosopher. Compress these ponderings into a couple of pages, and you'll go mad. |
Feanira Darr
Perkone
Caldari State
12
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 11:57:00 -
[25] - Quote
she puts the moa back in momma knawmeen
"Tibus Heth could also benefit from working 'The Plan'." -DMC |
Krixtal Icefluxor
INLAND EMPIRE Galactic
18484
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 12:48:00 -
[26] - Quote
She so ugly, she inspired the design of the next Minmatar ship............... |
Liafcipe9000
Smeghead Empire
6779
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 12:50:00 -
[27] - Quote
Krixtal Icefluxor wrote:She so ugly, she inspired the design of the next Minmatar ship...............
the Harbinger Navy Issue is not a Minmatar ship
You may gain the knowledge, but you will lose your belief, with all its mystery and comfort. If there was proof, absolute and certain, there is an afterlife, why not quit this life, and be done with it?
Ponder about these things all your life, and you're a philosopher. Compress these ponderings into a couple of pages, and you'll go mad. |
Feanira Darr
Perkone
Caldari State
12
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 13:38:00 -
[28] - Quote
it's hot drop your mom o'clock
"Tibus Heth could also benefit from working 'The Plan'." -DMC |
KaptainKatie
Ladies Auxiliary
0
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 17:32:00 -
[29] - Quote
Your Momma sooo fat you have to make 2 trips in an Obelisk to bring her lunch. |
Kitty Bear
Disturbed Friends Of Diazepam
Tribal Band
721
|
Posted - 2013.06.30 18:28:00 -
[30] - Quote
your momma is so loose her sex-toy is an erebus |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
277
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 02:11:00 -
[31] - Quote
Minmatar ships are so fast because they're all trying to get away from yo momma... She's that smelly.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
277
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 02:14:00 -
[32] - Quote
Yo momma's so stupid she got excited about the news reports of food hauler ganks. She thought they said long-limbed hoes and were about her.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
277
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 02:17:00 -
[33] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat it costs her two Plex for a resculpt.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Feanira Darr
Perkone
Caldari State
13
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 03:55:00 -
[34] - Quote
you momma's so ugly, ibtl
"Tibus Heth could also benefit from working 'The Plan'." -DMC |
Samoth Egnoled
T.R.I.A.D
20057
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 07:56:00 -
[35] - Quote
Yo Momma's so stupid, She took from a can marked 'Free Stuff' outside a station.
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
-Winston ChurchillGäó |
Zane Tekitsu
D.I.C.A.D. Solutions
20
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 21:00:00 -
[36] - Quote
Yo mamma's so ugly, she looked at the server and caused the last great crash!
yo mamma's so fat, her ass displaced S2N.
yo mamma's so fat, she collapsed in on herself, and the science behind the doomsday was discovered. |
ShahFluffers
Ice Fire Warriors
Late Night Alliance
2770
|
Posted - 2013.07.01 21:58:00 -
[37] - Quote
Ila Dace wrote:Yo momma is so ugly the best the plastic surgeon could do was make her look like a Moa.
Here's a better one:
Yo momma so UGLY... that when the Moa saw her, it felt pretty.
And there are these gems...
Yo momma so FAT... that even CCP's logs show her!
Yo momma so EASY... that she made kidnapping the Damsel in Distress seem hard!
Yo momma so MEAN... that when the Mittani met her, HE threatened to kill himself (still too soon?)
Change isn't bad, but it isn't always good. Sometimes, the oldest and most simple of things can be the most elegant and effective. |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
279
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 01:25:00 -
[38] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat she holds her pants up with an asteroid belt.
Yo momma's so stupid that when I gave her a billion ISK just to see what she'd do, she gave me double back.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Sublime Rage
Corpus Alienum
Game 0f Tears
161
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 09:09:00 -
[39] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat she cant even dock ! |
Muad 'dib
The Imperial Fedaykin
Amarrian Commandos
1173
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 09:25:00 -
[40] - Quote
Your mommas so fat, when she fitted and fired a smartbomb, she hit everyone in new eden!
Cosmic signature detected. . . .
http://i.imgur.com/Z7NfIS6.jpg
I got 99 likes, and this post aint one.
|
Sublime Rage
Corpus Alienum
Game 0f Tears
208
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 09:51:00 -
[41] - Quote
yo momma's so fat a black hole couldn't even move her |
Liafcipe9000
Smeghead Empire
7008
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 10:27:00 -
[42] - Quote
yo mama so stupid she fell for my killrights scam and paid a billion isk to activate them 
You may gain the knowledge, but you will lose your belief, with all its mystery and comfort. If there was proof, absolute and certain, there is an afterlife, why not quit this life, and be done with it?
Ponder about these things all your life, and you're a philosopher. Compress these ponderings into a couple of pages, and you'll go mad. |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
283
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 21:27:00 -
[43] - Quote
Yo momma's so ugly that every time she deploys drones they go rogue.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
4852
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 21:36:00 -
[44] - Quote
Yo momma is so.... um.... yo momma is so d..... yo m......
Im trying to come up with something clever....but im being distracted by Ila Dace's boobs....
.... yeah...
Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings? |
Jayem See
Biohazard.
285
|
Posted - 2013.07.02 21:51:00 -
[45] - Quote
If she is as fit as my Mother they would stack up.
If I could get my mother some decent sex I would definitely look you guys up.
Sad problem is that she has had sex with enough freaks already.
So yo momma might be wet enough to sleep with some of you - but mine has enough respect not to.
Momma.
Ed - looked ok in my head - sry
Aaaaaaand relax. |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
283
|
Posted - 2013.07.03 02:16:00 -
[46] - Quote
Jayem See wrote:If she is as fit as my Mother they would stack up.
If I could get my mother some decent sex I would definitely look you guys up.
Sad problem is that she has had sex with enough freaks already.
So yo momma might be wet enough to sleep with some of you - but mine has enough respect not to.
Momma.
Ed - looked ok in my head - sry
Yo momma's so incoherent I don't even.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
283
|
Posted - 2013.07.03 02:30:00 -
[47] - Quote
Yo momma's so stupid she mines ice in a Machariel.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Hetalia Villen
Serenity. CORP.
Diggers Inc.
0
|
Posted - 2013.07.03 03:40:00 -
[48] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat i set warp shortest and it still showed the distance in weeks.
Watch me blunder about in Faction Warfare @-áhttp://noobshipgo.wordpress.com/-á |
Mahasti
Hedion University
Amarr Empire
0
|
Posted - 2013.07.04 03:39:00 -
[49] - Quote
Yo momma's so fat she has TWO titans - one for each half. |
Rain6636
Team Evil
620
|
Posted - 2013.07.04 09:51:00 -
[50] - Quote
Sublime Rage wrote:yo momma's so fat a black hole couldn't even move her
you almost had me at black
Free Thanatos Raffle-Lottery? ...Thing? |
Amarant'h
Fistful of Finns
Confederation of xXPIZZAXx
7
|
Posted - 2013.07.05 09:01:00 -
[51] - Quote
Yo momma is so big that when people thought that they finally found the edge of the space, they were just exiting from her vagina.
Yo momma is so fat that when she ate, she collapsed, and created a black hole.
|
Muad 'dib
The Imperial Fedaykin
Amarrian Commandos
1198
|
Posted - 2013.07.05 09:29:00 -
[52] - Quote
Your mommas so fat; when she jumps, everything falls over.
Cosmic signature detected. . . .
http://i.imgur.com/Z7NfIS6.jpg
I got 99 likes, and this post aint one.
|
Rain6638
Team Evil
625
|
Posted - 2013.09.04 13:05:00 -
[53] - Quote
/!\language/!\
your momma's so ugly... when she played Mortal Kombat....
Scorpion said "STAY OVER THERE!!!!"
Yo Momma Jokes! best of volume 1
I'M A GENIOUSSS!
[ 2013.06.21 09:52:05 ] (notify) For initiating combat your security status has been adjusted by -0.1337
yo dawg, we heard you liek industrials, so we put an industrial in yo industrial so you can loss while u loss |
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| Pages: 1 2 :: [one page] |