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Luther Kincaid
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Posted - 2006.01.29 23:50:00 -
[1]
Ok, at the risk of getting a roundhouse kick to the head, what's with Chuck Norris and Eve lately? I don't go a day without someone on the forums or in game talking about what Chuck Norris would do, or how hard Chuck Norris is etc etc etc
I must be missing something here, anyone care to fill me in (non violently, preferably without too many flames)
Cheers
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He's NOT the Jovian ambassador, He's a very Naughty boy! |
Rod Blaine
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Posted - 2006.01.29 23:55:00 -
[2]
Mr. T pities the fools that don't understand the way in which Chuck Norris inhabits the hearts of everyone in the world.
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Pepperami
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Posted - 2006.01.29 23:56:00 -
[3]
http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty
___________________________
 Originally by: TheKiller8
anyone who disagrees with my opinion is a racist.
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Selena Sellion
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Posted - 2006.01.29 23:56:00 -
[4]
Top 11 Facts:
1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
5. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
6. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
7. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
8. Chuck Norris' blood type is AK+. Ass-Kicking Positive. It is compatible only with heavy construction equipment, tanks, and fighter jets.
9. Chuck Norris owns a copy of the Pax Amarria.
10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
11. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Additional Chuck Norris Facts
* Chuck Norris once roundhouse-kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
* Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*ck down.
* Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
* The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
* Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
* Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.
* If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
* Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
* When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.
* The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
* Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
* CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
* Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
* There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
* Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
* What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe.
* Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
* Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.
* Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
* Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
* A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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My grandfather
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Posted - 2006.01.29 23:58:00 -
[5]
Originally by: Luther Kincaid
Ok, at the risk of getting a roundhouse kick to the head, what's with Chuck Norris and Eve lately? I don't go a day without someone on the forums or in game talking about what Chuck Norris would do, or how hard Chuck Norris is etc etc etc
I must be missing something here, anyone care to fill me in (non violently, preferably without too many flames)
Cheers
You, sir, deserve a good roundhouse kick. To the head, like you suggested yourself.
Chuck is talked about a lot because of only one reason: He is Chuck Norris. The sheer awesomeness of Chuck is indescribable, and therefore Chuck > all.
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Gamer4liff
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Posted - 2006.01.29 23:59:00 -
[6]
Vin diesel could kick chuck norris's pansy little arse.
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Luther Kincaid
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Posted - 2006.01.30 00:03:00 -
[7]
yep, read those years ago, just wondering why they've surfaced again, and why suddenly loads of people in eve are going on about it?
And btw, chuck is now 65, if he can still do a roundhouse kick, then props to him! personally I think Jet Li would beat the living C**p outta him, but that's just my opinion 
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He's NOT the Jovian ambassador, He's a very Naughty boy! |
Rod Blaine
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Posted - 2006.01.30 00:07:00 -
[8]
Fool, chuck Norris does not age, he simply counts backwards sometimes and makes the world spin in reverse.
Anyway, it's just some fad, just like that golden ratio thing a while back.
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Hllaxiu
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Posted - 2006.01.30 00:13:00 -
[9]
Edited by: Hllaxiu on 30/01/2006 00:14:05
Originally by: Rod Blaine
Anyway, it's just some fad, just like that golden ratio thing a while back.
Bah! All your base are belong to Chuck Norris!
I suggest checking wikipedia for any internet phenomenon for which you are not familiar. The entry on Chuck Norris has some info on the internet stuff. I think its fairly safe to blame Conan O'brien.
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Wendat Huron
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Posted - 2006.01.30 00:15:00 -
[10]
He's so lame some people thinks he's gone full circle to become cool again, well, they're wrong.
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Leandro Salazar
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Posted - 2006.01.30 00:16:00 -
[11]
http://www.ultimateshowdown.org
Special Guest Star Chuck Norris!
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Idara
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Posted - 2006.01.30 00:23:00 -
[12]
Originally by: Wendat Huron
He's so lame some people thinks he's gone full circle to become cool again, well, they're wrong.
You fool! You'll bring the wrath of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick into your puny skull!
--------------------------------------------------------
Ensign
BSC Military
The maximum image file size allowed for signatures is 24kb. --Jorauk |
Jester87
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Posted - 2006.01.30 01:57:00 -
[13]
Chuck is half man, half god, half centaur or something.. I dont even know..
Either way I have a framed picture of him I sleep with every night!
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Donis Ardis
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Posted - 2006.01.30 01:59:00 -
[14]
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the GoldenRatio
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Biosman
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Posted - 2006.01.30 02:03:00 -
[15]
Quote:
The sheer awesomeness of Chuck is indescribable
That's as "in awe" of the indescribable legend that is Chuck Norris.
originally by other chuck fans on this thread
http://oldforums.eveonline.com/?a=topic&threadID=283499
but these are my favorites
It is impossible to attack Chuck Norris with drones. Not only are the drones too scared to attack Chuck, he can also roundhouse kick them back to sender so hard, they vaporise their mothership
The offspring of Chuck Norris are Caldari
Every time Chick Norris takes a ****, a Gallente is born
The collapse of the Eve gate was caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick
When Chuck Norris travels trough space, his ship doesn't move. He moves the space around it
When Chuck Norris decides to pirate in secure space, Concord looks the other way.
Chuck Norris once ate a huge Veldspar asteroid in just half an hour. He would have done it faster if he didn't had sex the first 29 minutes with all the Carebears mining in that belt
Before jumpgates were invented, Chuck Norris had to roundhouse kick all travellers to other solar systems. There where no survivors
Ever saw those huge ancient derelict hulls floating around in space? Leftovers from titans daring to fight Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris has 100% resistance on any damage type
Chuck Norris doesn't mine. He roundhouse kicks the roids directly to station
Chuck Norris optimal range is 500km. He could go higher, but he wants to give his enemy a false sense of hope
Mindflood and drop are made from Chuck Norris tears
Every time you use a drone, Chuck Norris kills a kitten
It is impossible to tank Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris has every skill on level 6
Chuck Norris can get free clones at any station. They can do that because Chuck Norris never gets podded anyway
Every time something gets nerfed, the devs have to ask permission to Chuck Norris
It is impossible to find a safe spot when Chuck Norris enters local
Chuck Norris can see cloaked ships
There are already tech 3 ships in Eve. Too bad that only Chuck is allowed to fly them
You can't jam or scramble Chuck Norris. The instant you try, you wake up in a new clone
Chuck Norris doesn't need different sized arms to beat up lil kids, so why does the raven need different sized missiles?
Chuck Norris doesnt need to RHK, his enemies throw themselves into his foot
The reason minmatar use duct tape on their ships is so they are easily replaceable when Chuck Norris has them pwned.
chuck norris dont use warp core stabilizers. ever.
when you see a railgun mounted on chuck norris ship. its not a real railgun. its just a simple pipe conected to chucks pod from where he roundhouse kicks the charges at hyper sonic speed at his aim.
you can't see chuck norris in local but he can see you.
CCP didn't just made up EVE, it is the true future seen by one of the devs after he got roundhouse kicked into the future by Chuck Norris.
Shortly after arriving he got kicked back by Chuck Norris who were there waiting for him.
Chuck Norris gets 100% refines by crushing Veldspar with his pelvis. This yields 50% Morphite and the rest equal amounts of Zydrine, and Nocxium, Megacyte, instead of Tritanium.
When God was creating the parts the universe now known as "deadspace", he got roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris so those parts were unfinished.
Chuck Norris does not use jump gates, the universe moves around him to where he wants it.
Chuck Norris wtf pwned 3 dreadnoughts in an ibis ... and he only had mining lasers fitted
BIOSMAN-OcUK:GUARDIAN AND PROTECTOR OF THE DAMSEL |
Surfie
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Posted - 2006.01.30 02:50:00 -
[16]
Chuck Norris isnt that lame.
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Malthros Zenobia
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Posted - 2006.01.30 02:53:00 -
[17]
Originally by: Gamer4liff
Vin diesel could kick chuck norris's pansy little arse.
Sorry, but Vin Diesel is about as big of a blowhard as you can possibly find in hollywood these days.
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu
I'm probably one of the biggest Bush fanboys in Eve...
This is like, Darth Vader, can't-reach-climax-without-killing-a-puppy evil.
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Fuujin
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Posted - 2006.01.30 02:58:00 -
[18]
Please guys, we've come a long way from barrens chat. I thought the EVE crowed was a bit more mature than silly internet fads.
_______________
The sword has to be more than a simple weapon; it has to be an answer to life's questions
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Dr Happy
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Posted - 2006.01.30 02:58:00 -
[19]
heres the question:
Do you think Chuck Norris knows about this?
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Cvuos
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Posted - 2006.01.30 03:01:00 -
[20]
Something Awful invents it, rest of internet catches on later but won't let go.
Today's traffic news, bandwagons are bumper to bumper on the information superhighway.
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Jake Monroe
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Posted - 2006.01.30 03:24:00 -
[21]
Originally by: Dr Happy
heres the question:
Do you think Chuck Norris knows about this?
Yes, Chuck Norris knows about the Chuck Norris Facts. He even stated he finds some of them funny.
Originally by: TomB
Originally by: Einheriar Ulrich
Mining in a dreadnaught.....Should be banned
/signed
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Zikke
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Posted - 2006.01.30 03:41:00 -
[22]
I find the whole "Chuck Norris" fad a bit boring and annoying. But hey, that's just me!
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Get over it. (TM) |
Necrologic
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Posted - 2006.01.30 03:46:00 -
[23]
Originally by: Pepperami
http://www.4q.cc/chuck/index.php?topthirty
can't...breath...ahahahahahahahahaha
Official Nos Troll |
Biosman
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Posted - 2006.01.30 03:55:00 -
[24]
Edited by: Biosman on 30/01/2006 03:56:13
yeah and lets cap it off with some real facts in respect for chuck.
Chuck fought and won the World Professional MiddleWeight Karate championships by defeating the World's Top Fighters. He held that title until 1974 when he retired undefeated.
Chuck is also founder and President of United Fighting Arts Federation with over 2,300 black belts all over the world.
In 1997, Chuck achieved another milestone in his life by being the first man ever in the Western Hemisphere to be awarded an 8th degree Black Belt Grand Master recognition in the Tae Kwon Do system. This was a first in 4,500 years of tradition.
end of thread
BIOSMAN-OcUK:GUARDIAN AND PROTECTOR OF THE DAMSEL |
Shin Ra
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Posted - 2006.01.30 04:01:00 -
[25]
Originally by: Gamer4liff
Vin diesel could kick chuck norris's pansy little arse.
Chuck Norris could kill Vin Diesel by thought alone.
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w0rmy
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Posted - 2006.01.30 04:03:00 -
[26]
Originally by: Gamer4liff
Vin diesel could kick chuck norris's pansy little arse.
Vin Diesel would loose a 1 on 1 to my mum.
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MrPops
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Posted - 2006.01.30 05:44:00 -
[27]
I always find it odd how some people worship others. What's even more odd is how they always seem a step away from doing sexual favors for them.
Let me put it this way, is talking about Chuck Norris going to get you laid? Out of all the fads you can follow, this has got to be the lamest. Way to much time and energy spent on some dude who is past his time. No matter how hard you guys try Chuck Norris is not cool.
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Malthros Zenobia
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Posted - 2006.01.30 06:07:00 -
[28]
I have a question:
Has eBaumsworld 'legally received' lots of Chuck Norris pics/flashes/etc yet?
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu
I'm probably one of the biggest Bush fanboys in Eve...
This is like, Darth Vader, can't-reach-climax-without-killing-a-puppy evil.
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Cowboy
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Posted - 2006.01.30 06:13:00 -
[29]
Chuck Liddell>Chuck Norris
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Cowboy
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Posted - 2006.01.30 06:13:00 -
[30]
Edited by: Cowboy on 30/01/2006 06:13:16
meh
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Walker Ranger
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Posted - 2006.01.30 06:44:00 -
[31]
Luther Kincaid, hes just that good.
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CitzNo 097864
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Posted - 2006.01.30 06:50:00 -
[32]
Oh hey a Chuck Norris thread.
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SHINJI AKARI
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Posted - 2006.01.30 06:58:00 -
[33]
Chuck wins again.
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Tony Fats
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Posted - 2006.01.30 07:28:00 -
[34]
Have you guys seen Chuck's workout machine?
I hear Christy Brinkley likes the smooth up and down motion...
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Jack Thurner
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Posted - 2006.01.30 14:52:00 -
[35]
Edited by: Jack Thurner on 30/01/2006 14:52:02
Don't forget about how it all started!
http://media1.break.com/dnet/media/content/snlchuck.wmv
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Adonis 4174
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Posted - 2006.01.30 15:22:00 -
[36]
Mr. T can walk on water. He can also walk on fire. His preference however, is to walk on fools.
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Caldari battle chef
I was a geek before it was cool |
Spartan239
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Posted - 2006.01.30 17:10:00 -
[37]
must not respond....
Bruce lee is the masta
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Xoria Krint
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Posted - 2006.01.30 18:51:00 -
[38]
Originally by: Spartan239
must not respond....
Bruce lee is the masta
Cool so i own you?
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Space Invader | Unknown | Xoria Krint
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KingsGambit
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Posted - 2006.01.30 19:34:00 -
[39]
Originally by: Selena Sellion
* There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
That one has had me in stitches for the last 10 minutes! LOL. 
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My T2 Shop |
Luther Kincaid
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Posted - 2006.01.31 10:57:00 -
[40]
Originally by: Xoria Krint
Originally by: Spartan239
must not respond....
Bruce lee is the masta
Cool so i own you?
in that case consider yeself wtfpwnd!
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He's NOT the Jovian ambassador, He's a very Naughty boy! |
Kalahari Wayrest
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Posted - 2006.01.31 12:41:00 -
[41]
Quote:
In 1972, he acted as Bruce Lee's nemesis in the movie Way of the Dragon,
I know who he is now 
__________________________
Indulge Me |
Orrin Danestarr
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Posted - 2006.01.31 14:47:00 -
[42]
It is a little known fact that Bruce lee is actually budded from Chuck Norris when he thought about having an asian son.
*Respect for Bruce*
"Imagination is the key that unlocks the door." - ME |
Nuck Chorris
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Posted - 2006.01.31 18:10:00 -
[43]
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Brolly
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Posted - 2006.02.01 04:58:00 -
[44]
Haven't had a good laugh for ages, those be some good 'facts'
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Dimitri Chandler
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Posted - 2006.02.01 08:20:00 -
[45]
You do realise that Chuck Norris is 65 years old?
Couldn't pwn his way out of a paper bag.
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M00dy
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Posted - 2006.02.02 21:12:00 -
[46]
/\
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M00dy
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Posted - 2006.02.03 18:47:00 -
[47]
Chuck > 
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HC MasiEEE
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Posted - 2006.02.03 18:49:00 -
[48]
Originally by: Luther Kincaid
Ok, at the risk of getting a roundhouse kick to the head, what's with Chuck Norris and Eve lately? I don't go a day without someone on the forums or in game talking about what Chuck Norris would do, or how hard Chuck Norris is etc etc etc
I must be missing something here, anyone care to fill me in (non violently, preferably without too many flames)
Cheers
Moved from EVE General Discussion - Ductoris
Look in my sig what chuck got too say about yous
____________
HC MasiEEE
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Conan O'Brian
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Posted - 2006.02.03 19:10:00 -
[49]
Originally by: Hllaxiu
Edited by: Hllaxiu on 30/01/2006 00:14:05
Originally by: Rod Blaine
Anyway, it's just some fad, just like that golden ratio thing a while back.
Bah! All your base are belong to Chuck Norris!
I suggest checking wikipedia for any internet phenomenon for which you are not familiar. The entry on Chuck Norris has some info on the internet stuff. I think its fairly safe to blame Conan O'brien.
blame me? 
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ATUF |
Cowboy
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Posted - 2006.02.04 15:05:00 -
[50]
Originally by: Luther Kincaid
Originally by: Xoria Krint
Originally by: Spartan239
must not respond....
Bruce lee is the masta
Cool so i own you?
in that case consider yeself wtfpwnd!
Ohh yeah well consider yourself OMGWTFBBQPWND
Even the mighty Chuck takes an ass whooping!!!
Sorry Chuck
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Drasked
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Posted - 2006.03.16 22:03:00 -
[51]
Sex vs. God
yep.. tought so.
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hired goon
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Posted - 2006.03.17 12:22:00 -
[52]
Chuck Norris doesn't need a cloaking device. He tells other people he's not there.
Chuck Norris doesn't mine. All the roids in a system refine themselves and wait patiently in his hanger when he enters local.
People who write 'first' in a topic are never first. Chuck Norris is.
Alliances don't own any space. Chuck Norris allows them to exist in his.
0.0 didn't exist until Chuck Norris joined the game.
Chuck Norris plays through downtime and patch deployments.
If Chuck Norris tries to fit a module on a ship but doesn't have enough CPU, it will decide to simply fit itself and not give him the message "you need more CPU"
When Chuck Norris runs out of turret hardpoints, he holds the guns in his hand.
Chuck Norris is the best fleet commander in the game, but he doesn't speak on teamspeak or type in game channels. People simply do what they think he might want them to, while he isn't even logged in. He's never lost a battle.
CCP never upgraded tranquility to 64bit IBM Blade servers. Chuck Norris told the old servers to work better.
Chuck Norris doesn't need BPOs. The BPCs are too frightened to run out of runs.
When Chuck Norris boards an Omen, it becomes a Zealot.
-omg-
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Usul Faust
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Posted - 2006.03.17 12:42:00 -
[53]
Didn't the chuck norris thing happen, like, years ago?
no skills, just luck.
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