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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.13 14:10:00 -
[1]
Edited by: Velsharoon on 13/09/2006 14:16:00
Yours is not to ask why, yours is to do and dieà
So goodbye Molden Heath!
But donÆt worry we arenÆt leaving, you are 
All pilots who live in Molden Heath under the alliance Namtz'aar kÆin have a choice to make, submit to us as your masters under the following terms and we wonÆt raze Molden Heath to the ground.
Arrogance? I think its simply a matter of numbers, we have 22 you have 448, its simply a matter of time before we bring you down so we have decided to give you a chance to give up your sordid life styles in the sickening den of carebearing that is Hedalofwhatever you call it. Not only are you Carebears your Carebears with an agenda as this memo from your alliance boards proves. What it proves we are not sure, possibly Aariss sucks with MS paint, but for now I am inclined to believe you really are just a bunch of cowboys who grief the people of Molden Heath whenever the inclination takes you, one could almost say your pirates!
So for the salvation of Molden Heath our terms are thus, every corporation in Namtz'aar kÆin must deliver
100 million units of tritanium
100 Exotic Dancers
1 Unit of Livestock (last time it was for Danks, but he left to go ômercenaryö but ekundo has taken the place of our old sadistic nympho dwarfö
100,000 Units of Spirits (we like our drink like you like level 4 missions and Gallente children)
50 Long Limb Roes
100 Units of Tobacco
One faction ship of any Ship Class
A Noob ship of any race, fully T2 fitted. Mining lasers are welcome.
Half a ton of bananas. We will pm you jungle jims address when all other conditions have been met.
1.2lb of catnip. Yes Xune is a cat, really.
On top of this we humbly suggest that every member of Namtz'aar kÆin commits ritual suicide for their sins, by self destructing their capsules in Gelfiven while pronouncing that ôVelsharoon rocks my socks offö and ôHinik is sexyö alternately until their capsule explodes with a little squishy sound. Then you can come on to our Ventrillo Server and sing the lemmings theme tune, and if this doesnÆt exist (I havenÆt checked) you can write one yourself, but no vowels are allowed.
Finally I would request a haiku from Elsebeth Rhiannon or Smeggy, whoever is more literally minded. Please note that as per any institutions rules plagiarism is strictly prohibited in the BDSM Boudoir.
I hope that you realise how your alliance has grievously erred in blobbing up and thus denying an honest pirate alliance to make a living, and I trust we can reach an amicable resolution that involves a lot of bloodshed and alcohol fuelled debeate on the the merits of spanking versus whipping to keep you rebellious minnies in line.
Farewell from your local friendly Carebear corp
Velsharoon
PS DonÆt even try be smart and point out contradictions in my post. There arenÆt
Edit: bad formatting
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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.13 14:19:00 -
[2]
I appreciate the spelling ****s I typed it this morning still hungover and it wasnt spotted until my faithful minion Hinik went OMG DONT POST ITS RAZE in corp, disaster averted.
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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.13 16:03:00 -
[3]
Yes why have we announced it now. No idea tbh. Quite simply theres to many of you, as I said 22 vs whatever.
And what do you expect us to do magically summon the forces to take you on 
O wait...
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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.13 16:52:00 -
[4]
There are no contradictions!
And actually honest and pirate do not mutually exclude one another. If i kill you after you pay a ransom then yes that would be dishonest, and I would be a dishonest pirate. BDSM wont do that to you thus we are honest pirates 
And the war was just to remove sentries from what we thought would be reasonable fights like we had in ATUF or even when we had empire war decs on NMTZ, in fact we didnt even make a post on our own forums about it. Blame the alliance executor and whatever minion he asked before he did it. Possibly me...
Now we are actually gonna make an effort...see?
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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.14 13:05:00 -
[5]
 Originally by: Seleene
Edited by: Seleene on 14/09/2006 05:46:54
Vels, your banner would have been better with Funshine Bear. 
Thats been my msn pic since I was in frick 
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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.15 17:28:00 -
[6]
You know we can protect ourselves, and are happy in Molden Heath, and have been since we came here, in fact 99.9% of our members think its amazing.
If you want to come after us when the contracts over and wipe us out do it.
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Velsharoon
Gallente
Corsets and Carebears
Whips and Chains
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Posted - 2006.09.18 21:38:00 -
[7]
look at our killboards? We also pirate heimatar to ;)
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