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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.05 00:40:00 -
[31]
Woohoo! I got a Blog set up to post, concurrent with the forum thread. For more convenience for all, no doubt.
http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/
I'm a bit wary about comparisons to Innominate Nightmare though. He's of course, the legendary man in a shuttle. I'm merely a player who barely has a million SP, and now enjoys the joys of a (mostly) symetrical Ferox. No rollover crashes for me! :D ~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/ |
Patch86
Di-Tron Heavy Industries Freelancer Alliance
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Posted - 2006.11.05 00:45:00 -
[32]
Originally by: Aries Acheron
I'm a bit wary about comparisons to Innominate Nightmare though. He's of course, the legendary man in a shuttle. I'm merely a player who barely has a million SP, and now enjoys the joys of a (mostly) symetrical Ferox. No rollover crashes for me! :D
Lets face it, theres no avoiding it: Inny is the legend who all subsequent EVE blog writers are guarunteed to be compared to. No use fighting it -----------------------------------------------
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Aceoil
Anti-Macro Coalition
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Posted - 2006.11.05 02:19:00 -
[33]
Originally by: Patch86
Originally by: Aries Acheron
I'm a bit wary about comparisons to Innominate Nightmare though. He's of course, the legendary man in a shuttle. I'm merely a player who barely has a million SP, and now enjoys the joys of a (mostly) symetrical Ferox. No rollover crashes for me! :D
Lets face it, theres no avoiding it: Inny is the legend who all subsequent EVE blog writers are guarunteed to be compared to. No use fighting it
It's good to get in early before the market is saturated with writers. __________________________________ Tired of the Macro Miners? Take control! Join the Anti-Macro Coalition |
Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.05 08:46:00 -
[34]
Edited by: Aries Acheron on 05/11/2006 08:47:17 Part 3 - Things get economically viable!
ôWhat do you want? I hate beggars.ö Came a voice, spat out in the rudest tone IÆve ever heard.
I stood plainly, mouth agape at the man sitting at the desk. He was middle aged, wearing an odd type of clothing I had never before seen, with sunken cheeks and clearly lacked even basic skills in personal hygiene. It soon became apparent once my eyes set upon his nametag.
Originally by: "Nametag" æDuogh Birik. Level 1 Advisory. Quality: -19.Æ
Not exactly a flattering job title. I certainly wouldnÆt want the words æQuality: -19Æ following me wherever I went, no matter how accurately it described the man before me. I supposed he had good reason to be surlyà Either way, I coughed awkwardly. Obeying some strange desire within me, I responded in the only way the voices in my head let me.
ôI want work. Do you have any?ö
He glared down upon me, and immediately began to list details. Before I could space out to blissful daydreaming, his annoying voice took my attention and I waited impatiently with a sigh, mentally undressing the Achuranese Secretary typing to one side. IÆd talk to her if I could, but Level IVÆs like her just donÆt bother with little people like meà my little thought bubble broke back to the mission briefing.
Originally by: "Quality -19 Mission Agent" àSince I am so very busy at all times of day, youÆll need to get a few things done for us. As weÆre very security-conscious, we need trusted hands to transport paperwork to the copy machine, then to deliver copies back. This is precisely why weÆre offering the job to you, complete stranger.
Now, take this [mission critical document] to the copy machine on the fourth floor. When youÆve made copies, return to me. The payment for this will be $5.15, your hourly wage. If you can complete this task within six minutes and twenty five seconds, you will receive a bonus of eight 9-volt batteries I keep in my desk.
As he spoke, my own mind wandered to various thoughts. Not the least of which was the question of how this kind of a business model could ever prosper. Why was this man offering me batteries as a reward for swift service? I decided to boldly shrug. He did offer some money after allà
ôI accept your mission.ö I said, all officially. He seemed satisfied, and told me to get the hell out of here, tossing the æimportant papersÆ onto an empty section of his desk. I took them without further fuss, to venture for the fabled fourth floor copy machine. I double-timed it to the elevator, pressing the æcallÆ button. That pleasant feminine voice from earlier returned soon after tormenting me again with her polite rejectionà
Originally by: "Elevator Traffic Control" You are now 6th in queue to enter the Elevator. Please wait.
Impatience set in. I tapped a foot and growled. Why the hell does everything have this godawful wait?
Once the elevator opened, I scrambled in and began to mash the æ4Æ button. Thankfully no further delays occurred, and I stepped out, making my way down a well marked path to the photocopier.
At once, I found myself sweating.
Why was this so easy? Where was the suicide bomber standing in the doorway, taunting me to come closer? Where were the inexplicable post-it note messages or long delays?
Nothing would have prepared me for what happened inside the copy room...
(To be continued...) ~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/ |
INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.11.05 09:28:00 -
[35]
Expression Of Hearty Support
Aries,
I enjoyed reading these first three parts immensely.
You write extremely well and I would like to wish you continued success in your stunning new adventure to interpret the glittering world of EVE.
Being someone who was at first called a "Bard", and then a "Journalist", and then "A cross between Paris Hilton and Ernest Hemingway" and then "A Gonzo Journalist" and then "Celebrity", I would like to warn you that your readers will viciously attempt to categorise you and label you in the most shocking manner.
As a fellow author, I will pre-empt this outrageous slander, and will start off by ridiculously labelling you as:
Swiss Chocolate
(probably to be continued...)
The 0.0 Experiment
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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.05 19:02:00 -
[36]
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE Expression Of Hearty Support
Aries,
I enjoyed reading these first three parts immensely.
You write extremely well and I would like to wish you continued success in your stunning new adventure to interpret the glittering world of EVE.
Being someone who was at first called a "Bard", and then a "Journalist", and then "A cross between Paris Hilton and Ernest Hemingway" and then "A Gonzo Journalist" and then "Celebrity", I would like to warn you that your readers will viciously attempt to categorise you and label you in the most shocking manner.
As a fellow author, I will pre-empt this outrageous slander, and will start off by ridiculously labelling you as:
Swiss Chocolate
(probably to be continued...)
Labels! Egads, I had never considered such a possibility. Hmm. I shall accept your title, of 'Swiss Chocolate'. It is quite descriptive. I salute you.
Perhaps in the End Times, where only Journalists/Bards/Paris Hilton/Import Candy roam the earth, and all are forced to turn upon each other for survival, we shall see then who gets in the last label.
Until then, I will recipricate your generous show of favor, by dubbing thee 'Literary Princess. ~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/ |
BLAIYNE
Shadow Play
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Posted - 2006.11.05 19:12:00 -
[37]
Originally by: Aries Acheron Why was this man offering me batteries as a reward for swift service? I decided to boldly shrug.
Now that's funny! Keep it up!
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Taram Caldar
Caldari Acheron Vanguard Armada The Shadow Ascension
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Posted - 2006.11.05 19:20:00 -
[38]
Originally by: BLAIYNE
Originally by: Aries Acheron Why was this man offering me batteries as a reward for swift service? I decided to boldly shrug.
Now that's funny! Keep it up!
I LOL'd on that one myself :)
Very nice work. I now have two threads to check every sunday at work (what can I say... sundays are kinda slow).
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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.06 09:29:00 -
[39]
Edited by: Aries Acheron on 06/11/2006 09:31:54 Part 04 û Public Relations
ànothing happened. I wasnÆt ambushed, attacked or trapped under a stack of discarded crates left around for advertising purposes!
Before I even realized my status still resided as ælivingÆ, I possessed the photocopy of the [mission critical documents]! Wasting no time, I returned to the lobby where my Quality -19 friend waited. I smiled, half wishing to give him a piece of my mind by telling him that I didnÆt have time for his stupid missionà but a combination of polite sense and my own desire not to starve to death as a bum won over.
ôI finished the job.ö I stated simply. He shrugged, tossing me a wad of cash and an 8-pack of batteries into my chest. I fumbled and caught it.
ôGood. Come back to me later, and IÆll have something else for you to do.ö
Alright, that sounded reasonable. This all left me feeling happy. I made money. I had a place to get work. I hadà a pack of batteries?
I waited a few seconds when ælaterÆ came and then I asked for a new job. More of this kind of cakewalk paper-copying and IÆd be set to move somewhere nice, like Southside Gallente Hills, where thrills abound and life is cheap. IÆd drown my sorrows with Quafe Spritzers and enjoy afternoons with those French ladies and their transparent clothing.
I felt so good in fact for my newfound $5.15 and the priceless batteries, that I even paid attention to his request this time through. I smiled and hummed nostalgic oldies tunes as he spokeà
Originally by: öMission:ö öMinmatar protesters have been picketing our building for days because we apparently exploit minorities. This has been bugging me somewhat, so I want you to go outside and eliminate them.ö
My Quality: -19 Pal said this in the calmest manner in the world. I stared at him incredulously. Did a guy working for a bookstore just ask me to kill people? What the hell kind of place was this?
He continued, completely oblivious to my look of alarm and confusion.
Originally by: öMission:ö öThe reward for this mission is fifteen dollars. If you complete it within twenty one minutes, and four seconds, you will be awarded an additional bonus of fifteen bags of garbage.ö
I was going to kill peopleà for the wondrous bounty that was corporate garbage and fifteen dollars? I gaped and almost told him to shove ità but then again, money was money.
I took the job hesitantly, leaving the building with great anxiety washing over me. Would these people be reasonable and leave without me having to fight them? Or would they tell me off, and stick to their principles to continue the protest? As I pondered such issues, I saw the trio of protesters I was sent to æeliminateÆ on behalf of the Barnes and Noble Corporation.
They looked tough and strong and menacing. Each carried a picket sign, made from rusted corrugated iron nailed sloppily on a bent brass pole, rusted through and through with words lazily written on them. I guess the poor Mataris didnÆt even have access to proper cardboard these days.
A CONCORD police officer walked along only a few yards away, so I decided to play it cool and be a sensible negotiator with the protesters, using all of my cunning, charisma, and the soul of a kind, decent human being.
I had no idea that it was going to be the stupidest thing IÆve ever done to that pointà
(To be continued)
~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/ |
Seleene
Body Count Inc. Mercenary Coalition
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Posted - 2006.11.06 09:38:00 -
[40]
Edited by: Seleene on 06/11/2006 09:40:49
Okay... after part four, now I am interested!!
EDIT - I must admit to being curious as to how far you can take this. -
Movie: 9UY - Got Fighters? |
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Luthien Ze
Mindstar Technology United Confederation of Corporations
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Posted - 2006.11.06 09:54:00 -
[41]
Must....read....part....5!
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Valkazm
Amarr Cursed Spawn SMASH Alliance
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Posted - 2006.11.06 10:40:00 -
[42]
Originally by: Aries Acheron I was going to kill peopleà for the wondrous bounty that was corporate garbage and fifteen dollars? I gaped and almost told him to shove ità but then again, money was money.
love it
Cursed Spawn recruitment |
nutbar
Caldari State War Academy
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Posted - 2006.11.06 11:07:00 -
[43]
I can't stand chocolate, but I'm truly enjoying your stories :) I'll have to re-label you "Pizza" or something tastier (though it's not always healthy, the stuff still tastes good after being left out for 4 days - can't go wrong with that!) :)
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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.06 11:15:00 -
[44]
Originally by: Seleene Edited by: Seleene on 06/11/2006 09:40:49
Okay... after part four, now I am interested!!
EDIT - I must admit to being curious as to how far you can take this.
Eep! It's Seleene, of that nice Carebear Miner Corp!. I'm so starstruck by the visits. Next thing I know, it's gonna be Killer9 showing a flash movie while Cyvok asks to be portrayed as an man armed with a nuclear rocket launcher sitting on a small mobile continent...
(looks to the W.W.I.N.D. bracelet).
Originally by: nutbar I can't stand chocolate, but I'm truly enjoying your stories :) I'll have to re-label you "Pizza" or something tastier (though it's not always healthy, the stuff still tastes good after being left out for 4 days - can't go wrong with that!) :)
Nutbars aren't healthy for you either! Nuts contain free radicals, you know. And in Bar form? Puh-lease! That's so 2004. Pizza also is greasy. I'm more of 'Orange Soda' than Pizza. :P ~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/ |
Rana Ash
Minmatar Aeon Trinity
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Posted - 2006.11.06 18:05:00 -
[45]
Wonderful,stunning,such grasp of the world of EVE I applaud your efforts, i will follow this with intrest..
¦on Trinity is recruting, inquire within for details lyret dedreen
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Plymer Ization
ISS Navy Task Force Interstellar Starbase Syndicate
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Posted - 2006.11.06 18:21:00 -
[46]
Awesome stories, you're quite the writer. I definitely laughed out loud at the batteries as well, causing the people I was sitting with at lunch to give me a strange look... but definitely an awesome series.
Looking forward to part 5 - keep it up
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Imzadi dax
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Posted - 2006.11.06 18:41:00 -
[47]
niiiice. LOL null |
Drahcir Monarchy
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Posted - 2006.11.06 19:04:00 -
[48]
I love it. Keep up the awesome work, you are getting a nice fan base here. I caught myself laughing out loud a few times.
Cheers,
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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.07 01:00:00 -
[49]
Part 4.5 And now a word from our sponsors:
Action! Suspense! Jita! is brought to you by... Caldari Automotive Corporation, building working, affordable ships, no matter how they look and by the continued funding and sponsorship by readers like you.
(fades to some random public EVE-o-Vision commercials) ~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/
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Gindar
Dragonfire Intergalactic Crusaders of Krom iPOD Alliance
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Posted - 2006.11.07 01:03:00 -
[50]
Originally by: Aries Acheron Part 4.5 And now a word from our sponsors:
Action! Suspense! Jita! is brought to you by... Caldari Automotive Corporation, building working, affordable ships, no matter how they look and by the continued funding and sponsorship by readers like you.
(fades to some random public EVE-o-Vision commercials)
rofl
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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.07 19:48:00 -
[51]
Edited by: Aries Acheron on 07/11/2006 19:50:05
~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/
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Aries Acheron
Caldari The Valour
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Posted - 2006.11.07 19:50:00 -
[52]
Part 05 û ItÆs a vicious cycle.
ôHi!ö I called out wittily to the group of three Minmatar protesters I was sent to æeliminateÆ. ôHow about we talk about your concerns? I think we can come to a reasonable resolution that will ensure all parties are satisfied.ö
I stood there, eyes bright and hands resting at my side. I had offered conciliation to these people, smiling in wait for their undoubtedly friendly reply. Suddenly, a strange feeling seemed to grip me. Their eyes met mine, and they all stared silently and intently, in the same manner a wolf stares at sheep. I felt as if they were locking onto my poor, soft body.
Immediately, the group charged forward, lunging ferociously. Spittle exploded from their lips as they went into a completely unexpected fit of aggression. I looked to the CONCORD police officer still walking by, completely uninterested by the fact that I was about to get beaten upon. No help would from that guy, it seemed. My taxpayer dollars sure were being well spent.
The rusted steel protest signs reading æNo Blood for AmarrÆ started bashing down on me. I did the only thing that I could, and started randomly flailing to hurt them back first. In a daze, I fought those dirty rats, kicking their surprisingly incompetent hides without much trouble. Snatching one of the rusted metal signs from the smallest one, I began to swing with wide arcs. I fought one off, taking him out of the fight with a swift chopà and then the next. I realized these three had barely laid a scratch on me, so my fears of my own death faded. Dispatching the last protestor and heroically smashing his face upon the ground, I finally tossed aside the weapon. I was covered in sweat now. I had killed.
A sudden sense of guilt struck me, and I closed my eyes. Three lives extinguished by the whims of the Barnes and Noble mega-corporation, at my hand. I decided to sate my disturbed soul the only way I could.
I looted their bodies for money.
Not bad. I had now made twenty five bucks, and even found a new pair of æArbalestÆ Medium Socks. As I sat and counted my newfound loot, and tried on my newfound footwear, I barely noticed a Quafe Truck driving by to the intersection. Before the truck stopped at the light, it ran over one of the now penniless bodies, creating enough of a bump to dislodge a box of Quafe.
I looked over to the fallen crate, standing up then. ôOh lookà refreshments.ö I smiled to myself. I really needed something to drink after all that carnage and murder. I casually walked away from the pile of corpses to take a single can from the box. I was so distracted by my thirst, that I didnÆt notice the small warning post-it note about stealing that floated down featherlike from the sky, telling me that I had stolen from the driver and was now 'fair game'.
The driver stepped out of the truck, staring down at me. I meanwhile, popped the top off a can and drank it down contently. The taste of ice cold Quafe was refreshing enough to distract me from the sensation of having my lungs shot out by the driver, now firing a very large handgun repeatedly into my chest.
Precious life fled my body. Things grew dark around me, and I knew I was dead. Things became blacker and I felt sereneà as if in a safe, tranquil place. The feeling vanished however, once I felt the hands of the truck driver taking my newly fattened wallet, and those expensive named socks. I swore silently, before a white light engulfed meà
(to be continued?)
~~~ Action! Suspense! Jita! http://survive-eve.blogspot.com/
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Godar Marak
Amarr Return Of Red Dawn
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Posted - 2006.11.07 20:01:00 -
[53]
Edited by: Godar Marak on 07/11/2006 20:01:58 Yeah! *pumps both fists*
You are a great writer, dont ever stop!
*pumps fists again* -------------------- \0/\0/\0/\0/\0/ Cant we all just get along? Wheres EVE heading? |
Splagada
Minmatar Tides of Silence
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Posted - 2006.11.08 02:58:00 -
[54]
i love the commercial break :D ------
relaxed corp looking for members |
Kesslan Osefice
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Posted - 2006.11.08 04:47:00 -
[55]
Bloody brilliant. :D
And, as your forever now doomed to be compared to the most noble Inno, I must say, at the same time your story while equally quite well writen and ammusing, is also, very different.
I look forward to reading more
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Phelan Boots
Queens of the Stone Age Anarchy Empire
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Posted - 2006.11.08 04:53:00 -
[56]
This is absolutely amazing. I 'd in rl.
Quote: info It's not a good idea to place an Exotic Dancer in a Giant Secure Container. The Exotic Dancer will not survive intact, if transported in such a container.
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Toros Revoke
STK Scientific Ascendant Frontier
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Posted - 2006.11.08 05:30:00 -
[57]
I laughed and subsequently coughed due to feasting on Tortilla chips, I've a mind to set some thugs from the Mormon coalition on yu for that!
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
Besides, tea must always take precedence over war....
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Zartmann
XUKRUT
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Posted - 2006.11.08 05:51:00 -
[58]
Keep it up... I'm ROFL for almost 3 minutes... Great stuff!
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Malev Volos
Caldari Fortunate Few
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Posted - 2006.11.08 06:22:00 -
[59]
Edited by: Malev Volos on 08/11/2006 06:22:49 Edited by: Malev Volos on 08/11/2006 06:22:28 I must say, wildly refreshing!! Just like Orange Soda ^_^
I cannot place this in a bin with Inny, even if people would like to, its a different genre and very well written. Enjoy them and hope to read more, great capturing the feel of EVE with every day life, like the 9v batteries compared to getting 8 small capacitor batteries, hehehe wonderful indeed.
Keep up the good work, will read more and more!! Its my sig.. if you don't like my sig, don't read it ^_^ |
Seleene
Body Count Inc. Mercenary Coalition
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Posted - 2006.11.08 07:33:00 -
[60]
Okay, that's it. I'm addicted now. -
Movie: 9UY - Got Fighters? |
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