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Santiago Cortes
Caldari
Forum Moderator
Interstellar Services Department
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Posted - 2007.02.14 05:09:00 -
[121]
Update:
With a surprise attack the nefarious alliance K1DS took out HA1-R.
RENTS have been accused of a desperate early-morning combover to thwart the attack and both sides have been petitioned to GR4ND-MA.
Rumours that RENTS have had to retreat to TOU-P+ are at the moment unconfirmed.
RENTS have tried to negotiate their surrender to KIDS with the offer of COOK1-ES but after someone failed with their ginger nut levels, J4R was exposed and put into reinforced.
But fear not RENTS, we have yet to introduce our sekwet weapon, codenamed "AUN-T1E" which we hope will spread confusion amongst the KIDS' ranks.
Currently I am having trouble sourcing an AUN-T1E and would appreciate it if someone could find such an item. I hear a credit card and some sweet talk will secure such an item quicker than a 7-nanoed megathron.
Remember, even if we suffer a few losses on the way, we only have to hold out till they're 18.
forum rules | [email protected] | Our Website! |
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Aiolos Caci
Caldari
British Space Corporation
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Posted - 2007.02.14 06:46:00 -
[122]
Priceless 
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Ragnar Black
Dusk and Dawn
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Posted - 2007.02.14 07:20:00 -
[123]
lol keep it up great thread , what's the latest from the warzone?
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Brunswick2
eXceed Inc.
INVICTUS.
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Posted - 2007.02.14 07:21:00 -
[124]
Unfortunately, Drakma just won EVE. We're all going to die.
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Chochko
KIA Corp
KIA Alliance
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Posted - 2007.02.14 07:22:00 -
[125]
-------------------------------------------
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Davlos
Caldari
Omerta Syndicate
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Posted - 2007.02.14 09:04:00 -
[126]
<3
Fu*king hilarious thread.
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Trigo
Caldari
Da Dark Star
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Posted - 2007.02.14 09:11:00 -
[127]
Best posts i've seen in a long time.
------------------------------------
 Originally by: Eris Discordia
Do it yourself minmatar thong; duct tape. Underwear and wax in one.
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Noveron
Caldari
Celestial Horizon Corp.
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Posted - 2007.02.14 09:50:00 -
[128]
Dont get too overconfident Drakma, the fight ahead will still be tough... you still have to clean the WC's on 2 bathrooms.
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Kam SingDu'k
Singularity.
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Posted - 2007.02.14 10:06:00 -
[129]
Originally by: Santiago Cortes
Update:
With a surprise attack the nefarious alliance K1DS took out HA1-R.
RENTS have been accused of a desperate early-morning combover to thwart the attack and both sides have been petitioned to GR4ND-MA.
Rumours that RENTS have had to retreat to TOU-P+ are at the moment unconfirmed.
RENTS have tried to negotiate their surrender to KIDS with the offer of COOK1-ES but after someone failed with their ginger nut levels, J4R was exposed and put into reinforced.
But fear not RENTS, we have yet to introduce our sekwet weapon, codenamed "AUN-T1E" which we hope will spread confusion amongst the KIDS' ranks.
Currently I am having trouble sourcing an AUN-T1E and would appreciate it if someone could find such an item. I hear a credit card and some sweet talk will secure such an item quicker than a 7-nanoed megathron.
Remember, even if we suffer a few losses on the way, we only have to hold out till they're 18.
Drakma? or am I being in 5T00-PID
Your signature exceeds the maximum allowed dimensions of 400x120 pixels and filesize of 24000 bytes -Taiatia (mods@ccpgames) |
Kam SingDu'k
Singularity.
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Posted - 2007.02.14 10:07:00 -
[130]
UPDATE:
I am stoopid. sorry guys I tried my best, anyone out for hugs?
Your signature exceeds the maximum allowed dimensions of 400x120 pixels and filesize of 24000 bytes -Taiatia (mods@ccpgames) |
DaneelROlivaw
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Posted - 2007.02.14 10:16:00 -
[131]
even me as a robot had to lough
DRO
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Unbeliever Kresmoreen
Pro Valde Justicia
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Posted - 2007.02.14 10:51:00 -
[132]
Edited by: Unbeliever Kresmoreen on 14/02/2007 10:48:21
Made my day at work  . Good to hear all those fake battle reports, but the real ones have a more lasting impact  .
I'm lucky enough not to have encounters with these systems yet. Perhaps in the future ill wage wars with the infamous [KIDS] Alliance 
quality anyway!
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Sethris
British Space Corporation
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Posted - 2007.02.14 10:55:00 -
[133]
Originally by: Vandervecken Smith
I hope you managed to keep the House and Furniture BPOs.
Here's hoping your MOM pilot wasn't headhunted by an alliance with T2 House BPOs, that would suck
If MOM jumped out of system with furniture bpo's from your corp, feel free to contact [IKEA] corp to help you out with that. They are very accomodating with that sort of things. Though you need to have PE lvl5 and Flat Pack Assembly lvl5 to use the furniture bpc's and construction parts supplied. Hope it helps...
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Eta Carinea
British Space Corporation
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Posted - 2007.02.14 11:42:00 -
[134]
I defiantly advise against introducing the corporation [KIDS] with the System [M-FI] as all hell is known to break lose. I have known noobs in the [KIDS] corp use such underhanded tactics as using item [display toilet] in a covert ops fashion to all allied corps whilst subtly betraying themselves to the enemy corp [STAFF]. This tactic i have come to call [Check Mate] only recourse is diplomacy and a deep SS.
PS
this is a great thread i have recently become a grandad at a young age i might add. sooooo [WTB] hardners, all types needed. :)
Eta
Quid Si Coelum Ruat
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Quetzl
Amarr
Merch Industrial
We Are Nice Guys
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Posted - 2007.02.14 11:47:00 -
[135]
I have disturbing news regarding the ex-corp member MOM. I have it on good authority that she is a CSR and partially responsible for the account creation of the KIDS corporation who you are currently at war with.
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Pcash
British Space Corporation
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Posted - 2007.02.15 11:07:00 -
[136]
Oh My God what an excelent post laughing out load in the office some funny looks
Sig removed, please keep it under 24,000 bytes, email [email protected] if you have any questions - Xorus |
DinoC
ZiTek Deepspace Explorations
Prime Orbital Systems
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Posted - 2007.02.15 12:02:00 -
[137]
Finally something worth reading... Thanks Drakma for this thread.
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Apple Boy
Gallente
Thundercats
RAZOR Alliance
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Posted - 2007.02.15 21:03:00 -
[138]
This weeks events lead to major changes within the war.
In the [K1DS] alliance, the [GANGSTA] corp of those that had graduated from the school of applied knowledge have taken on some nasty habits, including drinking spirits, smoking tobacco, gathering small arms, and renting out exotic dancers to fund their war efforts. in a push back against CONCORD the [GANGSTA] group have been using those with licenses for bigger ships to yield titans and carriers, using alts to drop cynos and attack CONCORD from behind.
In the process, CONCORD has added a curfew, only allowing the other corporations in the [K1DS] alliance permission to be in the system [B3-D] with all others being shot on sight. [K1DS] being angry about the massive downtime from 2100 to 700, along with the downtime on weekdays now going from 1000-1500 allowing them to only enter [SCH-0l] decided to make a deal with CONCORD to kick the [GANGSTA]s out of the alliance in return for shorter curfews.
In the negotiations stage, CONCORD conferred with it's NAPed partners, including [TEACHERS] and [PARENTS], to make sure if they reset [KIDS] from red to neutral that they would not act on NBSI and move to only attack if provoked again. In agreement, settings were changed by all parties, CONCORD removed the late night curfew, and changed it's attentions towards the abandoned [GANGSTA]s corp. [PARENTS] on the other hand, controlling the regions around [K1DS] set certain times for NBSI and warned [K1DS] anyway.
With the loss of ability to use any of the outposts owned by any of the alliances, including those in empire space guarded by concord, [GANGSTA]'s CEO unveiled it's Titan by killing many of CONCORD's ships. CONCORD decided it needed reinforcements and asked the [TEACHERS] and [PARENTS] alliances for help but they said they required Zor's DNA as proof that it was [GANGSTA]s doing.
To get the help, CONCORD got a spy into [GANGSTA] who headed into [L05-A] in the [CALI] constellation and grabbed it from [GANGSTA]s last remaining POS structure and took it to CONCORD. After CONCORD showed this to the NAPed alliances, they all wardec'ed the [GANGSTA] corp and sent a massive fleet of capital and battleships into [H1D-0UT] and crushed them all. In the battle, [GANGSTA]s CEO tried to use the Titan again, but it just couldn't do enough damage to the capital ships to stop them. Unfortunately no fraps were taken as none in the victorious alliances knew enough about computers to make them. Many [GANGSTA] members quit and were never seen again after that.
Most of their trade goods were blown up, and all of the exotic dancers were taken back to the school of applied knowledge. CONCORD then took some of the Commander's dog tags and put them on display at the billboards in the constellations [K1DS] had sovereignty over to remind them what happens if they step too far out of line.
For the time being, peace (and ratting to fatten the wallets) have fallen throughout the universe again.
(But the [K1DS] alliance were secretly planning something )
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Yakoff
Star Scream Inc.
Tactical Narcotics Team
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Posted - 2007.02.15 23:21:00 -
[139]
It was a long day in the W-0RK system. I was just about to finish up capital production,
When the B-033 told me there was a design change. Our users decided to nerf some of the systems to take away from the lag. New reports came in, and I had to change my production immediately. These changes were also going to require a switch in my skill training û causing about 2 weeks of delays.
After 10 hours of setting up a new POS, it was time to go H-0M3. Sitting two hours in my slow moving BS through Traffic Delays and Advisories, an interceptor to my left attempted to bump/tackle me. Being on guard, I hit MWD and accelerated to my starboard.
Unknown to me, a concord agent was behind me. He pulled me over for exploiting the traffic rules. After being given a T2 over priced ticket, I was left to go with a nice ôDrive safelyö remark.
Upon reaching H-0M3, I realized I was missing the key into the complex. I go back into BS to retrieve said key and am happy once again that I get entry into H-0M3. Ah, my day is brought back to life as I see daughter (D2) with a smile on her face. It lit my day up seeing her. However, I never did quite catch that the smile was hiding something behind it. Where is MOM and D1, I ask. D2 gave me intel that they have gone to Empire buy some new Faction gear on market.
ôWhat, T1 is not good enough?ö I ask. D2 quickly responds, ôYou just donÆt understand how hard it is being a noob, do you?ö
Oh well, instead of getting into this argument, I decided it was time for some R&R. I go to my Command Center. Ah, the C&C. Basement as some call it. Dungeon, as referred to by MoM. Yes, IÆm growed up û it is okay for me to retreat to the Basement. Fully stocked Keg-erator filled with home brewed DUFF. Got the BPO if you want to buy it.
Ah, a good hour goes by of quietly carebearing it up in a hidden complex. Then all hell breaks loose. MoM and D1 have returned. I hear the yelling, I just was not listening.
Eventually, MoM comes down to the C&C. ôWill you please do something about your daughters?ö she commands. (MoM, btw, is 100% FC when at home).
OK, sure. I shall handle this petty border skirmish. According to D1, D2 had invaded her sovereignty constellation. D1 further accused that D2 entered the CL0-S3T system
And stole her Guristas, as it respawned. D2 yelled out, P or STFU.
Well, only one way for me to figure this one out. Logs and research. Hmm, no logs show that D1Æs region had ever been entered. There goes that. So, I decided to do a quick search in D2Æs region. Also asked D1 to give me a full list of items that have gone missing from the CL0-S3T system.
Some of D1Æs missing items were found. However, D2 went on the offensive. D2 yells out, ôShe had some of my stuff in there! She stole my stuff. I just wanted it back!ö
ôFine,ö I reply, ôbut why did you have to take her stuff?ö
D2 then answers, ôWell, she took my stuff first, and I just wanted her to see how unfair it was.ö
ôOkay, fine,ö I retorted. ôPlease return the items belonging to D1, back!ö
D1 then yells, ôyou never punish her. You always let her go. This is not right!ö
After going 20 posts from D1 and D2 over the skirmish, I came to one conclusion.
ThatÆs it I decided. IÆm grounding both of them and shutting the system down. ôGo to your Outpost, without dinner,ö I order.
I return to C&C, and am greeted by MoM. ôDid you really have to send them to their Outpost? IsnÆt that a little harsh?ö
ôYou told me to take care of it. I did,ö I answered.
ôShouldnÆt you consult me about this?!ö She snapped.
After several minutes of more bickering, I shall find myself spending time alone in C&C on C-0UCh during downtime tonightà..
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Apple Boy
Gallente
Thundercats
RAZOR Alliance
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Posted - 2007.03.06 18:53:00 -
[140]
any updates? this battle owns all others and must keep going
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Rochel Hakiri
principle of motion
Interstellar Alcohol Conglomerate
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Posted - 2007.03.06 20:10:00 -
[141]
Awesome thread
..just lol
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NereSky
Gallente
Rage of Angels
Morsus Mihi
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Posted - 2007.03.06 20:38:00 -
[142]
GM WIFE has Nerfed my activities with EVE after a NODE failure in the System BED ,
this node failure has resulted in total weopan failure and system crash,
because of this i may get a online ban or forum moderation shortly :(
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Punchin' Monkeys
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Posted - 2007.03.06 21:05:00 -
[143]
They blobbed me. I would retreat to empire, but all the gates leading out of low sec are malfunctioning. Clone Jump to GR4-M4?
2007.03.04 23:05
Victim: Punchin' Monkeys
Alliance: HOM-3 FRON7
Corp: T3HF4M1LY
Destroyed: Sanity
System: BE-D
Security: 0.0
Involved parties:
Name: Petey
Security: -1.7
Alliance: Hoodboiz
Corp: Patrick Henry Elementary Academy
Ship: OhBrother!
Weapon: Medium XT-9000 Runny Nose
Name: Sarah
Security: 0.2
Alliance: NinjaBarbies
Corp: Patrick Henry Elementary Academy
Ship: Punkin
Weapon: Phased Array Pout II
Name: BigDan
Security: 0.0
Alliance: CanineCannibals
Corp: M4n5 B357 FR13ND
Ship: Doghouse
Weapon: 'Malkuth' Standard Slobber Array
Destroyed items:
Basic Soap Dispenser I
Cross-Lateral Clean Towels, Qty: 2
Titanium Lamp
290mm Light Beers, Qty: 5
Extra Strength Headache Repairer, Qty: 2
Photon Scattering Self-Adhesive Bandages, Qty: 3
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mucklavee
Minmatar
The Shadow Order
Hydra Alliance
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Posted - 2007.03.06 22:30:00 -
[144]
BEST THREAD EVER! THE MOST I LAUGHED IN AGES!
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hybridundertaker
Amarr
Beagle Corp
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Posted - 2007.03.07 02:14:00 -
[145]
i think ill go camp BE-D after this good laught...
EvE +NLINE - T+TALHELLDEATH SUPPORTER |
Riddal
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Posted - 2007.03.07 02:44:00 -
[146]
hehehehehe , thats a good read.
Just as long as a Titan belonging to Outlaws[INLWS] is not deloyed out near the X-Wfe constellation everything will be fine.
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Golden Helmet
Caldari
Chaos Reborn
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Posted - 2007.03.07 02:44:00 -
[147]
Best thread in the history of Eve, no way to argue that
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Dahak2150
Chaos Monkeys
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Posted - 2007.03.07 02:53:00 -
[148]
Posting in an epic thread.
Sheer awesomeness.
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If you're on IE, pretend this is transparent while you get a browser that supports .png. |
Apple Boy
Gallente
Thundercats
RAZOR Alliance
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Posted - 2007.03.07 05:47:00 -
[149]
although my earlier post was rather cheesy (creative writing isn't my strong suite) I'm glad I resurrected this thread 
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Drakma
Gekidoku
Koroshiya Buntai
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Posted - 2007.03.07 06:10:00 -
[150]
I'll give a full update as soon as I can. Unfortunately, the noob [KID] only has Potty Training skilled up to level 1 and I am having to spam POS (Paper Osmoses Systems) in every solar system in the H0-M3 constellation to maintain sov.....
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Gekidoku is recruiting - Ingame channel Gekidoku |
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