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Kachak
Genos Occidere
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:15:00 -
[1]
Everything was so nice until today. I was happily salvaging wrecks in my tristan, thinking of how the caldari could beat the gallente blobs that kept harassing our systems. I was making good isk off of abandoned wrecks, and I was looking forward to honing my battle skills so I could actually fight one day.
Then, out of the blue, this supreme battle plan occurred to me. Now that it's too late to do anything about it, I see no troubles sharing it with you here:
THE SUPREME PLAN TO WIPE OUT GALLENTEANS OUT OF SPACE:
1. kill all gallente
2. salvage the wrecks
3. gain great victory
4. profit
Yes I know.. It's such a clear cut plan, not like the many others where the midstep to profit is blurred. I had the perfect plan, I only needed the powers to get it in action.
Then something magical happened. She invited me to fleet. She should have telepathically learned about my plan, or maybe I just slipped it out and she liked it. Anyways, there I was, the General of a huge x ship fleet (see, I promised you I would never do the same mistake again).
I was 40 jumps from where the fleet was gathering, so I began burning to the rendezvous point in my tristan. I was dreaming about the glorius days that awaited us - for the Caldari, and for me and her.
Then, this El'tar guy suddenly began harassing me. He was her ex it seemed, and he was mad that I was now the General of fleet. Rational as she was, she kicked El'tar out of fleet, and his skunky mates. I was more confident, more happy, and only 28 jumps out.
I wish I had never kept track of milita communication channel. I saw El'tar speaking about me, not in the nicest tone, I must admit. So I couldn't resist responding.
One thing led to another, and he scammed me into telling the size of our fleet. The moment I slipped that out, she denounced me from the fleet.
I cannot put in words how terrible I felt. I apologized, and asked to be forgiven but I wasn't. I swore El'tar that I would jump him one day and get my revenge, but he only ridiculed me. Dishonoured and outsmarted, I lost all my will to live on.
I pressed the selfdestruct button on my last ship, and sent all the isk I have to a poor guy who asked for my stuffs in comms. I was at the end.
But then, miraculously, as my tristan was blown into smithereens, my pod somehow survived. Sitting in a tight sphere full of goo and tears, I came to realize the obsolete truth.
I was not meant to die this way. I was the chosen one, to lead the Caldari to victory. All that happened today was just a test, and I had survived. I only had to go on and do it, grab it, and call it mine.
Unfortunately, as I am dictating this public message, all I have is the pod I'm sitting in. I have no guns, have no iskies, have no salvagers. So I am at a turning point.
Which is really why I shared all this with you guys. If you think I am the one, if you think I will be over this in no time, and get to lead the militia again, and even make up to her and win her heart back, this is the time you must do something.
Please help me get on my feet again. Send me a couple isk, or contract me some ammo. I have nothing left in this universe, except my pod and my dreams. This is your chance to make a difference.
I heartfully thank in advance to all those who feel empathy and give a hand.
I repeat my wow agains El'tar, who destroyed my world in half hour.
And I ask her once more to be forgiven.
End of message
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Another Liberthas
Caldari
Galactic Rangers
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:20:00 -
[2]
...What?
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Haradgrim
Tyrell Corp
INTERDICTION
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:20:00 -
[3]
Get help, this isn't a troll, I'm serious 
--
 Originally by: CCP Oveur
...every forum whine feels like a baby pony is getting killed
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los ojos
COGNET SpaceSystems Ltd
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:21:00 -
[4]
methinks you meant to post this in the RP thread
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Obsidian Dagger
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:23:00 -
[5]
*Slow, loud handclappings*
I missed reading these.
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Sodium Phosphate
Gallente
Killer Koalas
Kingdom of Butan
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:25:00 -
[6]
Halp....get sum.
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niroku
Gallente
KIA Corp
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:29:00 -
[7]
boohiss .
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P'uck
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:35:00 -
[8]
Edited by: P''uck on 27/08/2008 20:35:15
Now you see what happens if you leave out the "??????" step.
It's not pretty, I tell ye.
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Drunk Driver
Gallente
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:37:00 -
[9]
Uh...........
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Saint Lazarus
Spiorad ag fanaiocht
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:37:00 -
[10]
Originally by: los ojos
methinks you meant to post this in the RP thread
Defnitely, entertaining tho ^^
-----------------
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Another Forum'Alt
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:42:00 -
[11]
LOL WUT
RP forums are that way ----->
Save EVE's most famous landmark: Linkage |
Atlas Oracle
Minmatar
Native Freshfood
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:47:00 -
[12]
i wasn't going to tell you this before, but in your hour of need i can see intervention is necessary:
You are, indeed, The One.
i will not be sending you isk, however.
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Siberys
Gallente
Nebula Sharks
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Posted - 2008.08.27 20:48:00 -
[13]
You fail at planning.
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Jana Clant
New Dawn Corp
New Eden Research
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:05:00 -
[14]
You beggars are getting more and more elaborate.
9 out of 10 blueprints prefer New Eden Research!
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Esu Nahalas
The Night Corporation
RONA Alliance
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:06:00 -
[15]
This is one of the few threads I've seen where "Can I have your stuff?" is not a response. Well done.
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The Djego
Minmatar
merovinger inc
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:11:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Esu Nahalas
This is one of the few threads I've seen where "Can I have your stuff?" is not a response. Well done.
Well you canŠt get stuff from someone that got nothing left. 
Will donate 100 Charges of Antimatter S later for the poster if he backsabs Caldari and lead Gallente to the victory. 
----
Nerf Tank - Boost Gank!
Originally by: Amantus
Real men don't need to get into blaster range.
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GallenteCitizen20080615
Gallente
Federation War News
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:13:00 -
[17]
i will help you out
*send isk to gallente orphanage*
oo i was talking to the kids 
-_/-_/-_/-_/-
Please return trays to their upright position.
Thanks you for riding the forums |
london
Jericho Fraction
The Star Fraction
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:14:00 -
[18]
Since you are a supposedly elite pod pilot, your given faction has provided you with a new n00b ship upon docking.
It's a start.
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Feilamya
Minmatar
Pelennor Swarm
G00DFELLAS
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:27:00 -
[19]
I read it from bottom to top and stopped at the third line.
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Cygnus Zhada
Amarr
Reckless Corsairs
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:32:00 -
[20]
One of dem Garmon boys.
Stay clear or you might get cuties.
------------
We didn't want that boot.ini anyway |
niroku
Gallente
KIA Corp
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:34:00 -
[21]
Originally by: Cygnus Zhada
One of dem Garmon boys.
Stay clear or you might get cooties.
didn't you leave ?
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Cygnus Zhada
Amarr
Reckless Corsairs
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Posted - 2008.08.27 21:36:00 -
[22]
Account's not closed yet, I'm determined to have as much fun with the last days as possible. Take that as you will.
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We didn't want that boot.ini anyway |
Larkonis Trassler
Neo Spartans
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Posted - 2008.08.27 22:05:00 -
[23]
Can we get a tl;dr plox?
Assumption of Risk |
Spectre3353
Gallente
The Python Cartel
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Posted - 2008.08.27 22:07:00 -
[24]
Go go Kachak :)
-----
My Pirate Blog: http://evenewb.blogspot.com/
My Ransom Board: http://www.pcransomboard.com/ |
Joey Meow
MURAKAMI INDUSTRIES
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Posted - 2008.08.27 22:09:00 -
[25]
You should really consider stopping posting dumb threads...
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Taipan Leviathan
The Maverick Navy
Interstellar Alcohol Conglomerate
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Posted - 2008.08.27 22:53:00 -
[26]
Dock up
Recieve ship
Kill gallente
Profit
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Takon Orlani
Caldari
Chaos Monkeys
Monkey Religion
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Posted - 2008.08.27 22:56:00 -
[27]
gb2/abudban kachak. 
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Tsiros
Minmatar
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Posted - 2008.08.27 23:18:00 -
[28]
my name is BOND.
James Bond.
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Rawr Cristina
Caldari
Omerta Syndicate
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Posted - 2008.08.27 23:20:00 -
[29]
cookie!
- Infectious - |
Synapse Archae
Amarr
Demonic Retribution
Un-Natural Selection
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Posted - 2008.08.27 23:41:00 -
[30]
wat.
Originally by: CCP Garthagk
While these forums may not give you everything that you want, they will usually let you post.
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