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Dal Thrax Multiverse Corporation	Posted - 2009.01.05 17:20:00 - [31] The best Darwin Award I ever heard of, and I wasn't involved in this so I'm going solely off the forum story: Back in the days when T2 cost as much as faction does now, a pirate was drunk at a gate camp and killed and podded his own alt in a hauler full of T2 loot. Stupidest way I ever died, being in an afterburned equipped ratting Thorax in 0.0. At least I got the satisfaction of taking one of the tackle frigs that grabbed me as I was ABing out of the sling bubble with me. Got another cruiser into hull to. You know, now that I stop to think about it that was a pretty loose gatecamp...
Serapo Petrotestes Caldari 22nd Black Rise Defensive Unit	Posted - 2009.01.05 18:49:00 - [32] Originally by: mr passie but my most epic loss was in a mission I had my alt salvaging while there were still rats and he got tatgetted and warp scrambled. I send in drones on the rats with my main. Then to check on my alts ship I targetted him instead of switching accounts. I had autofire on and got concordonokkened with my main and my alt got popped by the rats... We have a winner!!!
Karrade Krise Galatic P0RN Starz	Posted - 2009.01.05 19:10:00 - [33] Roommate and I were in our first pirate corp together, we went out looking for trouble found nothing. Decided to go out and get something to eat, so we warped back the station and left. About the time when we got there I realized that I didn't remember actually docking... So I had my roomate call his GF whom was living with us, and he explained to her what to do to get me docked. The hilarious thing is that she ABSOLUTELY HATES EVE...because my roomate spent more time on it than with her. At first she said she wouldn't do it, then Chris told her she wouldn't get any for a week...Ouch. Voluntold, New Webcomic
Antonius Hari BoB Enterprises Veni Vidi Vici	Posted - 2009.01.06 00:55:00 - [34] About 1 year ago we had a small fleet out in some 0.0 space. We were in our then home pocket, when a scorpion and a Astarte entered system. There were 4 of us so we made chase, they left our pocket, and because we were busy we decided to let them run as there were some huge warps ahead and the system they entered is very deep to scan down. Anyway we keep playing in our local, but this time we see a pod come back in. We sent our buzzard pilot into the system where the Astarte and Scorpion were. Our buzzard gets a 0 metre scan on the Astarte, next to it is the scorpion, now the best bit. The Astarte is empty, and his pilot is the pod in the neighbour system. We set up our dictor to keep the pod trapped. Unfortunately for us, we have no command ship pilots at this stage, we are only young group. BUt the best part, our dictor pilot pods the the capsule three times while he trys to rescue his ship,, as we head out and kill his unmanned Astarte. We wished we could have stolen it, it would have been more fun, but anyway, we found and killed an unmanned command ship , because a pod pilot tried to be to clever ..
Heloise ChateauBriande	Posted - 2009.01.06 09:21:00 - [35] Originally by: Sputnik Tsygan ...or accidentally lock and shoot an NPC station in the middle of a fight you know you can win... This. I'm not proud of it either. Lost about 80M and any pride I had. - Helo
Serious Rikk The Legendary Fleet	Posted - 2009.01.06 11:40:00 - [36] Got a couple 1. Decided to go an hassle a pirate corp for a few days with my alt in a triple trimark geddon. Had some good fights with them but neither of us ever made the kill, until the day that I tinkered with bracket settings and forgot I had drones on my target when I de-aggressed. Needless to say I was cursing all the way through structure - still fun mind! 2. Sorry, a mission one. Fail none the less though. I think it was serpentis blockade adn there were 4 of us cleaning the mission out in remote rep ships My CEO had aggro so I was repping him, I also had aggro (We were both in trimark/plate megas) meanwhile I was getting a bit of repping love from my salvage alt and corpie 4 was handing out cap to all of us. My CEO accidently placed his remote rep on a rat and not me. Four pretty explosions later... -- Noble Scumbag
Gambuk	Posted - 2009.01.06 20:56:00 - [37] Cruising around looking for targets and going "damn nobody around..." So I warp into this system, and I scan... Holy crap, a hulk mining! I warp over, lock the hulk, scramble/attack the hulk... Get promptly blown up by concord. Why don't they have a "High Security" warning when jumping...
UMEE	Posted - 2009.01.06 22:07:00 - [38] Originally by: oodin camping a station alone in 0.0 when we was sieging them..suddenly my kid fell down the stairs so i had to run.. came back after 20 min and i still sat there camping it oh i get it, you neglected your child for a video game. hahaha.
UMEE	Posted - 2009.01.06 22:10:00 - [39] Originally by: Karrade Krise Roommate and I were in our first pirate corp together, we went out looking for trouble found nothing. Decided to go out and get something to eat, so we warped back the station and left. About the time when we got there I realized that I didn't remember actually docking... So I had my roomate call his GF whom was living with us, and he explained to her what to do to get me docked. The hilarious thing is that she ABSOLUTELY HATES EVE...because my roomate spent more time on it than with her. At first she said she wouldn't do it, then Chris told her she wouldn't get any for a week...Ouch. man, that hoe must be desperate. im sure your nerdy friend can't be that good.
Max Tux	Posted - 2009.01.07 01:00:00 - [40] a hauler which we where at war with decided to undock from the station that i was camping in my HAM drake, tried to target it - got the target is invulnerable message, kept control clicking while warming my point, finally get a lock, nad a message pops up , "are you sure you want to do that", i blindly click yes, as i do, i realize i had the station targeted, i don't warp off and stay long enough to point the hauler while my corpies warped in and took over, lol. warped of to a planet only to have the NPC bs's follow me, while asking on vent where the nearest non gallentee system was, lol. made it to the gate in 80% armor, never good on a drake lol, still was more fun that popping a hauler

MC Purge	Posted - 2009.01.07 04:54:00 - [41] Originally by: Dasquirrel715 Edited by: Dasquirrel715 on 31/12/2008 11:11:12 Edited by: Dasquirrel715 on 31/12/2008 11:10:19 I was multi-clienting, my alt had a t2 fitted thorax shooting my poor tristan in highsec, I had him tackled was afterburner-orbiting at 1km, and I alt tab before turning on my small armor repair (which I can run for a few minutes on autorepeat with my AB and guns) and tried to warp in my RR + cruiserkiller Megathron ready to roll, at 0 seconds remaining to lock my tristan and RR it, my tristan pops, and the rax runs from my mega. The small armor repair would have given me MORE than enough time to get my two LRAR's on it to keep it alive forever, while I slowly eat away at the capacitor (and therefore the tank) of the rax, and if it ever hit my mega, well...you know. There goes my t2 loot because I forgot to turn on one module/don't own two computers. And for a bit of showing-off, I can run two clients at 53 FPS on fullscreen and max premium settings....on my 1,500$ laptop :) Protip: You don't need 2 computers, just get a 2nd screen. If you run the clients in windowed mode you can just mouse between them. It makes dual accounting heaps easier. I often run 3 accounts across 3 monitors without too much trouble.
Janis Kallisti	Posted - 2009.01.07 07:48:00 - [42] I was to cyno in a low sec station hot drop in a kesstrel with a nice BS fight outside. I undocked and lit it up...but never did. I got nuked real quick along with a few corp mates. Forgot to load the fuel.
Dr Sheepbringer Gallente	Posted - 2009.01.07 08:45:00 - [43] Chasing a guy with a ceptor through 0.0 and just to jump out from a gate and aggro him...only realize he was in low sec now and gates have gunz.... Stop whining.
Mithos Victus Aurelius Federation Apotheosis of Virtue	Posted - 2009.01.07 15:14:00 - [44] Edited by: Mithos Victus on 07/01/2009 15:16:07 One of my old corpsmates was one of those brash arrogant types who liked to ride dirty, and then claim he was all powerful when he didn't get blown up. He ran L4s solo in a faction fitted Navy Mega with only 150 tank and an AB. In the course of the two weeks the following happened: 1. Lost Navy Mega #1 in an L4 (down 500mil) 2. Bought Navy Mega #2 3. Set course from Jita to mission hub 4. Course goes through low sec pipe near Jita 5. Sets autopilot 6. Lost Navy Mega #2 (down 350mil, was unfitted) 7. Borrowed 400mil from EVE Bank 8. Bought Navy Mega #3 9. Lost Navy Mega #3 in an L4 (down 500mil) 10. Still owed 400mil to EVE Bank 11. Ships left that he owned: Hulk, Hyperion 12. Money left in wallet: 100mil 13. Do the math And what clinches it all for me at least: 14. Still tried to tell everyone he knew what he was doing... _______________________________________________ [...a lion lurking in the plain]
Absolom Hues Gallente The Triangle Veneratio Venator Alliance	Posted - 2009.01.07 17:02:00 - [45] Originally by: Commander Yassir clicked self destruct by accident when trying to change ship name, coulden't figure out how to stop it That one made me laugh ___ Doing what's right isn't always the easiest thing... it's just right.
Omarvelous Destry's Lounge	Posted - 2009.01.07 18:37:00 - [46] Originally by: Janis Kallisti I was to cyno in a low sec station hot drop in a kesstrel with a nice BS fight outside. I undocked and lit it up...but never did. I got nuked real quick along with a few corp mates. Forgot to load the fuel. LMAO! Dude I remember that fiasco!
Maxpie Cross Roads	Posted - 2009.01.07 19:45:00 - [47] At one point in my Eve life I was doing courier missions (don't ask). Anyway, on more than one occasion I made long trips in a hauler only to arrive at the destination only to realize I forgot to bring the cargo. He put... creatures... in our bodies... to control our minds. He made us... say lies... do things.
Strike Valheru Caldari Divine Retribution Sons of Tangra	Posted - 2009.01.07 22:14:00 - [48] Well I live in 0.0 so I though one day "hmm gona train up for this new ship, I'll get an implant set to make it quicker, and while im at it ill get the other implants for agility" So couple days later my implant set arrives I go to station select all 10 of them and plug them in. Next thing I see over alliance channel "10 man gang camp, x up bs composition". So I warp to other station get in my torp raven, join fleet jump in system and warp to fight. Well more hostiles jumped in we tore through alot of them but in the end of the 3 ships our side lost mine was one of them, including a pod, with implants, that I just plugged in 10 minutes ago. Well that saved me about hmm half a minute of training time for a cost of 100+ mil. My death mail: http://bulg.otel.net/kb/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=49368 You can click on related kills to check the battle outcome Another nice fight that happened few days ago prior to my raven loss. I finaly managed to have someone jump in my drake from empire, on alliance comms "100+ man gang in nearby system" ok so we form up chase them, engage them, local up to 245. So im sittin there at gate pwning some primaried targets when finaly I am so lagged out I had to warp out. Thinking well since we got carriers in I'll warp to this cyno, so if I get primaried I'll get some remote reps from them. So I initiate warp to cyno, while in warp fc yells "all caps jump out". I finaly land there 170km from gate, first thing, get tackled, next I see alot of ships flashing red, I launch drones, I get jammed, drones few minutes later abandon me - I guess due to fact that they were on some ceptor and went out of my control range - so I finaly decide well I cant do much since im perma jammed, I allign for the gate and go my 110ms and occasional web of 60ms. 10mins later while tanking half of the small ships there and 80km from the gate im still traveling towards it. Untill finaly I get primaried at which time theres 400+ in local and only handfull of friendlies out of those. Tanked total of 109k hp and had 179 people on my death mail. If you're interested here it is, my death mail: http://bulg.otel.net/kb/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=49037 nice fight but 148 friendly against 450 hostile although we sort of held good 93 kills for 101 losses, although we lost some caps.
Esna Pitoojee Amarr Heavily Utilized Mechanic Mayhem	Posted - 2009.01.08 03:34:00 - [49] #1: So a hostile enters our 0.4 home in a Machariel (Angel faction BS, 800M). First mistake: He's flying a faction ship for PvP alone. Mistake 2: There's a Genolution station in the system, so he decides to play station hugging games with us (for those of you who haven't visited them, Genolution stations have a roughly 30km docking radius). Mistake 3: After 20 minutes, when around 30 of us have gathered to try and bump him off the station, he doesn't leave. So, when an alliance member brings out a heavily nano'ed BS, he gets bumped around 6-7km off the station in one hit. Locked, webbed, popped. Total ISK loss estimated around 1B, given the faction fittings. Second is my first loss, a cruiser. Ironically, it was in the same system in the first, although I was in the starter corp at the time. Basically, I jump in. There's a bestower sitting AFK on the gate, so I think 'Hey, how bad can it actually be?' I warp to belt and open up on a couple cruisers. Shortly, a drake, a prophecy, and a blackbird warp in. 'I'll wait and see if they are friendly,' I think. They deploy drones. "Maybe they want to help kill the rats," I think (I was such an epic noob...). 10 seconds later... splat Finally, when we were seiging a POS, to fend off our BSes one of the hostiles warped a carrier on the POS. Yep, you guessed it - he either forgot to input the shield password or put it in wrong. Hours later, the same character deployed a mothership in a nearby lowsec system we inhabited. He got it trapped on a gate, so he self-destructed it. I think we ended up collecting something like 22 of his fighters in the end. Actually, theres a pic of the Mom SD'ing on our KB, but I can't figure out how to link it.
Doctor Miyage	Posted - 2009.01.08 04:31:00 - [50] Being a new player, I often find myself dying stupidly. On my first go-round with EvE, several months ago, I was stupidly flying around in low-sec. In poorly outfitted frigate. This was maybe my second or third day of playing. I randomly warp to an asteroid belt, when all of a sudden I get a target lock. I didn't even have time to try and warp out. Three or four missiles from a Caracel popped me in a single volley. Kablooey. Another glorious death, this one involving much more stupidity, fell on me a couple days later. I was flying around .6 and .7 systems, enjoying feeling like a big dangerous bad guy, when I see some wrecks. This was before I knew that yellow=somebody else's. So, I start looting them, brushing off the warning that I was stealing for somebody. I figured it was a glitch, or that if it wasn't he was long gone and probably didn't care. I loot a couple when a big freakin boat warps in and begins targeting me. Panicking, I flee through two systems, this guy somehow only a step behind me the whole way. With me desperately trying to find a station to dock at, he finally catches up long enough to blast me once. Boom. Sad death. He then gloated about it, calling me a thief and a coward (using less kind words). Genuinely confused as to why he was allowed to explode me, I settle on the notion that the ships I looted must have been NPC allies to him. Somehow. Since the ships were NPC slaver rats, I say, "Maybe you shouldn't work with slavers, this confusion could've been avoided."

Tractory	Posted - 2009.01.08 10:10:00 - [51] Not me, honest, but getting warp scrammed in a mission and watching a nightmare go down has to hurt.
SwoopingHawkeye We See Dead People	Posted - 2009.01.08 10:59:00 - [52] Well when i first started to learn exploration and finding plexes was told if you didn't know what something was book mark your ship and warp to it in your pod. OK makes sense i think. So i find this nice plex in 0.0 bm my ship, eject and go check it out. its a gate so i think cool, warp to planet then back to where i had my helios at. I end up going back to the plex gate. Think ok i made a mistake so try it again with same results. so now here i am 10 jumps from nearest station in 0.0 in a pod. Well aparently where i left my ship was same grid as plex gate and it defualt warped me to the gate. Had to get a gang together to do the plex just to get my ship back. That was also the last time i ejected from a ship to check something out.
baagpus Beyond Divinity Inc	Posted - 2009.01.08 12:44:00 - [53] Some funny **** here, over the last 5+ years IÆm sure IÆve had many a moment but luckily high levels of alcohol has erased them from my memory however one still stands out Back when I joined my first pirate corp as a raw noob, I had made a tracking computer an integral part of my setup which worked surprisingly well so much so that one of my corp mates was running a pretty much identical setup. After months of flying around like this, during a camp I accidentally click the tracking comp instead of a warp scram and stare in amazement as it begins to flash. Seeing the comedy in the situation and laughing as I explained what happened over vent I meet with complete silence for a few moments followed by a barley audible click from my comrade in arms.
Peneios	Posted - 2009.01.08 14:00:00 - [54] I lost a T2 fitted scorpion to CONCORD because I fought an enemy wreck instead of the enemy ...couple of weeks later, same war, I asked my alliance leader at our SS if it would be ok to test my T2 fitted rook on his domi...I forgot he is not in my corp and we are in empire... I have a file now at the CONCORD headoffice now
Adaera	Posted - 2009.01.08 18:05:00 - [55] When I was new I thought it'd be a good idea to take on an assault missile fitted Caracal in a multispec Griffon. Yeah.
Deus Letus Chooch Inc.	Posted - 2009.01.08 21:16:00 - [56] Had just started doing inventions and invented a couple of eris and ishkur BPC's. So I open the market tab buy all the materials to build them. Hop into my MarkV fully rigged for max cargo of over 38Km3, and run off to pick up the supplies. Second to last jump I am going to get some materials jump in system warp to station get the delivery. Undock and can't understand why an abbadon and another minmatar BS (cant remember type) are attacking me. Hadn't realized I am in low sec. So i dock up just in time as armor is melting away. So now I am beiong camped by 2 BS's outside of a station in a low sec system and i have over 250mill woth of cargo in the hold of a 250 mill rigged out ship. So here I am waiting I undock again they agress I redock but in the time I notice one of the ships was called the ragnar danneskold. So I type in Local "Awe who is John Gault anyway" next thing he responds and we start talking about Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand and the correlation to Hillary Clinton's plan to offer a tax rebate on gasoline during the summer months. Which turns into a full discussion with the other pilots in local and the state of the world economy and how it is mirroring the novel Atlas Shrugged and what would AYn Rand think of what is happenning today. Suddenly I notice the 2 pirates have docked in the station next to me as we are carrying on this conversation. So I type a long thesis on what i thought post it in local count to 3 undock and warp to the gate while they are reading hit the gate and thank them for the insite while jumping out of system. Talk about being lucky. From now on I always check the system before i buy something
Doctor Miyage	Posted - 2009.01.08 21:25:00 - [57] While unrelated to the Darwin Awards of EVE, I would like it to be known that Atlas Shrugged is my favorite book of all time. That is all.
Schalac Caldari Apocalypse Reign	Posted - 2009.01.09 09:10:00 - [58] I recently helped an inty pilot out by being dumb. There I am in Tama and a red flashy is on planet. Crow tackles him and calls for help. We are in a 9 man FW fleet and I warp to him in my cormorant ready to kill. I get up on him and hit my point and laugh at his feeble attempts to kill my destroyer in an inty. Well he kills the crow and then starts working on me , I guess in his half structure he finally regains enough cap to activate MWD again, so he powers away from me less than half structure and I laugh and go back to looking for WT in local. Next thing I know a Vexor pops on grid. I say **** it to myself and engage. Next thing I know I am cap dead, drones all around me and quickly popped. I laugh at my stupidity, warp my pod out and go to get a new ship. I later check BC and see this Angel gets a free kill. I now challenge Angel to a frig duel. I'll bring my Merlin and he can bring his Claw. It will be fun.
Retail Therapy	Posted - 2009.01.09 10:22:00 - [59] My favorite personal comedy death came during a BS POS takedown. This is a tedious affair, so I'm a little distracted anyways. I'm doing a bit of cap xfer to a corpmate who's moved just out of my xfer range. I just click-click to move over a bit his way... At this point my 5yr old runs in with something terribly important to share (as all things to a 5 yr old are terribly important...), so I turn down Vent and pay attention to whatever it was that was so very important... All the while, my Domi is still moving...moving past the corpie and now moving well within POS gun range... The entire time, the gang is shouting at me in Vent and blazing away in corp chat...till, ya Boom, dead Domi. Oh well, it was insured and I didn't need those fits anyways. My favorite shared comedy death was from a friend that was inventing for a Deimios, and ended up with a Phobos. He says to himself, oh well, this could be fun too. Trains the couple of missing skills, fits it out and begins to play with his first Hictor. Problem was when he went to test the Warp Disrution Field Generator in empire without a script... concordokkened! As an additional footnote, I must say that I am pleased that an incidence of Atlas Shrugged has proven to demonstrate at once, an example of positive natural selection is saving the above's tragic losses, and at the same time demonstrating that the overall over-intellectualization of the average libertarian quite often undermines their effectuality, as in the case of the pirates that docked up and actually let you get away. P.S. One great book tbfh...
Sendinal Cortere	Posted - 2009.01.10 05:16:00 - [60] So me, a few days old, and my corpmate, even younger. decide to make a bit of ISK mining... In a 0.3 system... In destroyers... BOOM! "wut?" BOOM! "Why am I in a station?" "Me too!" Figured out later that it was a smartbombing battleship. We must of made their day.



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