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2 billion isk investment up for grabs, paid auditor wanted

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Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 13:35:00 - [1] I have a good amount of isk but I'm seeing it drop down as I pay for more and more PVP and do less and less money making. I'd like to invest about 1-2bill, but I also don't want to manage my money as I don't have much experience. What I'm asking for is two services. One: Something of a financial adviser, or, if preferred, someone to personally invest my money in something profitable and scam-free. You can also just use it for trade profit. I want lots of offers and I will pick the best one. Basically someone who can make money with my money and make a cut. Post what % of the profits you'll want, and details of your plan, and I'll be considering all reasonable offers. Two: An auditor/adviser who will (unless they want to work for free) get their requested % of the profits up to a 100m (negotiable) isk cap. They will also serve the purpose of confirming the legitimacy/profitability of offers. I will be looking for well-known people, and I ask the community for guidance to recommend me a trustworthy person for those role. If any of my two requests are blatantly unreasonable, it is due to my lack of experience and is not a scam meant to harm anyone, and I will immediately reshape my request to be more reasonable for the parties involved. Hopefully we can all make money off of this because I have some isk rotting around. If a time frame is requested, I have none in mind, but I won't like something that has my money tied up for more than a month without any money to show for it, I want the return on this investment to help, if not completely pay for PVP.
SetrakDark Caldari DarkCorp Technology and Finance	Posted - 2009.12.20 15:03:00 - [2] You are vastly overestimating the returns that an honest money-maker will pay you for the use of your funds. The fundamental weakness of all that goes on here is the ratio of available funds to genuine investment opportunities. Read the forums and invest your money in offers that match your risk/return parameters, just like everyone else does.
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:01:00 - [3] Am I? Did I even mention a flat return or even a % return that I want? Before you assume I think Im going to be making a bill a month and try to shut down my offer, let people who are interested post here and those who aren't can move along.
SetrakDark Caldari DarkCorp Technology and Finance	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:10:00 - [4] Originally by: Allahs Warrior I'd like to invest about 1-2bill Originally by: Allahs Warrior Two: An auditor/adviser who will (unless they want to work for free) get their requested % of the profits up to a 100m (negotiable) isk cap. 1) I pieced it together from this. Not complicated. 2) Chiiiiiiiil, Winstahn.
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:19:00 - [5] Edited by: Allahs Warrior on 20/12/2009 17:19:11 I have a friend (who would scam me so Im not paying him any money plus he's got almost 100b now so doesnt need it) who made billions from less than 100mil in a few months (outside of his scams) doing regional buy orders in many regions with many many characters for super cheap and picking them up using a freighter or transport and an alt scout on his second computer. I don't have the time to do that nor would I have much fun, I'd rather pay someone to do that for me, or whatever idea they have...and therefore I made the thread.
SetrakDark Caldari DarkCorp Technology and Finance	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:23:00 - [6] Sure, but people can get money here to do that at 4-8%/month, so why would they pay you more?
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:25:00 - [7] Originally by: reading comprehension If any of my two requests are blatantly unreasonable, it is due to my lack of experience" So I'll take whatever offers, 4-8% or w/e, that are given to me
SetrakDark Caldari DarkCorp Technology and Finance	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:32:00 - [8] Originally by: Allahs Warrior So I'll take whatever offers, 4-8% or w/e, that are given to me ...then after you pay your private auditor you will see returns in 2-4 months. Or you can invest in public offers like everyone else and get those same returns in 1 month.
Roguehalo Caldari Kimoto Innovations	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:41:00 - [9] I could use 2b for 2 months at 5% per month
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 17:58:00 - [10] Originally by: SetrakDark Originally by: Allahs Warrior So I'll take whatever offers, 4-8% or w/e, that are given to me ...then after you pay your private auditor you will see returns in 2-4 months. Or you can invest in public offers like everyone else and get those same returns in 1 month. Consider this a thread where public offers can be advertised to me that meet my funding reqs if they are underfunded.
SetrakDark Caldari DarkCorp Technology and Finance	Posted - 2009.12.20 18:04:00 - [11] Originally by: Allahs Warrior Consider this a thread where public offers can be advertised to me that meet my funding reqs if they are underfunded. Now you're talking. Roguehalo is a good example of someone who's been publicly vetted. You should also ask for links to their current and/or past offers.
cosmoray Bella Vista Holdings Corp	Posted - 2009.12.20 18:07:00 - [12] 2B at 3%
Vasta Magna Yarex Shipyards	Posted - 2009.12.20 18:34:00 - [13] I'll offer 10% on 2B, but no audit, and only for one month as I'll be busy by February. Saves me the trouble of typing up a bond offer. To be used for a combination of regional trade and T1 manufacturing. Here is a previous bond I did with a slightly different emphasis: Linkage
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 18:44:00 - [14] Good offers so far Originally by: Vasta Magna I'll offer 10% on 2B, but no audit, and only for one month as I'll be busy by February. Saves me the trouble of typing up a bond offer. To be used for a combination of regional trade and T1 manufacturing. Here is a previous bond I did with a slightly different emphasis: Linkage reason for no audit? Not questioning you as it seems two of the people before this thread have had good business with you, just curious why you would specify.
Vasta Magna Yarex Shipyards	Posted - 2009.12.20 18:56:00 - [15] Originally by: Allahs Warrior reason for no audit? Not questioning you as it seems two of the people before this thread have had good business with you, just curious why you would specify. The short answer is I have no truly good reason. The long answer is that it's a minor annoyance and the currently available auditors are pretty green (no offense guys). The 10% rate I'm offering is a premium in acknowledgment of my lack of transparency.
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.20 19:06:00 - [16] Ill be waiting a day or two to see more offers develop, although 200m over 2 months for zero work on a vetted dude is a pretty good offer.
Dr Karsun Gallente HUSARIA Curatores Veritatis Alliance	Posted - 2009.12.21 11:48:00 - [17] Find a 0.0 alliance that puts up outposts... Invest 2b in the outpost together with a group of other people willing to invest 20-30b together. . . . Slowly profit untill someone takes over the outpost (which with the new sov system is... Well... Never?
flakeys T.H.U.G L.I.F.E The Volition Cult	Posted - 2009.12.21 12:35:00 - [18] Originally by: Allahs Warrior Ill be waiting a day or two to see more offers develop, although 2 billion loss over 2 months because of zero collateral on a one-offer dude is a pretty good offer. Changed it to reflect the actuall way it usually goes.
Allahs Warrior Gallente Reverse Psychology.	Posted - 2009.12.21 14:34:00 - [19] like I'd accept anything without collateral lol
Vasta Magna Yarex Shipyards	Posted - 2009.12.21 14:53:00 - [20] Edited by: Vasta Magna on 21/12/2009 14:53:43 Originally by: flakeys Originally by: Allahs Warrior Changed it to reflect the actuall way it usually goes. Bah. I may not have an MD Platinum Card but I'm no fly by night. I've held unsecured funds and am invested in a couple public bonds/IPOs. Originally by: Allahs Warrior like I'd accept anything without collateral lol Ah I was assuming unsecured. If you want full collateral I can only offer 5% on 1.5 bil. But my earlier offer stands if you change your mind.
flakeys T.H.U.G L.I.F.E The Volition Cult	Posted - 2009.12.21 15:06:00 - [21] Originally by: Vasta Magna Edited by: Vasta Magna on 21/12/2009 14:53:43 Originally by: flakeys Originally by: Allahs Warrior Changed it to reflect the actuall way it usually goes. Bah. I may not have an MD Platinum Card but I'm no fly by night. I've held unsecured funds and am invested in a couple public bonds/IPOs. Originally by: Allahs Warrior like I'd accept anything without collateral lol Ah I was assuming unsecured. If you want full collateral I can only offer 5% on 1.5 bil. But my earlier offer stands if you change your mind. I was not saying you where a scammer i was pointing out how pinky the OP made it seem wich investing is not.This is reflected by your remark to him towards the collateral.
Vasta Magna Yarex Shipyards	Posted - 2009.12.21 15:22:00 - [22] Originally by: flakeys I was not saying you where a scammer i was pointing out how pinky the OP made it seem wich investing is not.This is reflected by your remark to him towards the collateral. Fair enough. I also wouldn't quite call me a "vetted dude," as I haven't been publicly audited to date. Although I do like the phrase. Maybe I'll make Vetted Dude my corp title. VD for short? Wait, sounds like I have syphilis
Kalrand Charles Ponzi School of Business GoonSwarm	Posted - 2009.12.21 15:44:00 - [23] Edited by: Kalrand on 21/12/2009 15:45:41 Edited by: Kalrand on 21/12/2009 15:45:17 Get the 3% BMBE bonds advertised in another thread, though I think that rate is absurdly low. Torn and Co have been around forever. You don't have 5b. never mind. Cosmo up above would also work. I bet if you told him 4%, or even 5%, he'd take it. You could probably buy some "titans 4 u" shares somewhere, and depending on your purchase price, you should do ok. I'd offer you some of my bonds, but your about a week and a half late for that party.
Roguehalo Caldari Kimoto Innovations	Posted - 2009.12.21 16:45:00 - [24] Edited by: Roguehalo on 21/12/2009 16:47:43 Originally by: flakeys Originally by: Allahs Warrior Ill be waiting a day or two to see more offers develop, although 2 billion loss over 2 months because of zero collateral on a one-offer dude is a pretty good offer. Changed it to reflect the actuall way it usually goes. I think the op was commenting on my offer. I'm not totally sure why you think my offer isn't totally legitimate and completely rock solid.

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