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Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 1 post(s) |
RomeStar
Astra Research
25
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:33:00 -
[1] - Quote
I will start
What does the Bermuda Triangle and Goons have in common?
They've both swallowed a lot of seamen. |
Corina Jarr
Spazzoid Enterprises
Purpose Built
910
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:35:00 -
[2] - Quote
Isn't a joke supposed to be funny? |
Surfin's PlunderBunny
Blue Republic
RvB - BLUE Republic
1591
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:39:00 -
[3] - Quote
There's no sea in space |
Nyreanya
Serenity Labs
New Eden Research.
256
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:42:00 -
[4] - Quote
But there's no space in seaman either.
Not everyone thinks the same way you do. This doesn't automatically make them wrong. |
Lady Hek
Pyramid Celestial
0
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:43:00 -
[5] - Quote
Nyreanya wrote:But there's no space in seaman either.
lots of seamen have been in goons though |
Roc Wieler
Tribal Liberation Force
Minmatar Republic
168
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:45:00 -
[6] - Quote
While training to be Dusters, an Amarr and a Caldari jump from a dropship in low atmosphere. Both forgot their parachutes. Which hits first?
The answer? Who cares?
Yes, this joke is incredibly funny to Minmatar everywhere.
Never start a fight you can win.
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Surfin's PlunderBunny
Blue Republic
RvB - BLUE Republic
1591
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:53:00 -
[7] - Quote
Roc Wieler wrote:While training to be Dusters, an Amarr and a Caldari jump from a dropship in low atmosphere. Both forgot their parachutes. Which hits first?
The answer? Who cares?
Yes, this joke is incredibly funny to Minmatar everywhere.
Don't think they use chutes... reckon it's more like Roughnecks 
http://youtu.be/zdq9HHnI-Es?t=6m46s |
Kyle Ward
Tribal Liberation Force
Minmatar Republic
127
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:56:00 -
[8] - Quote
I'm not even going to dignify this thread with a post.
The Sandbox, you're playing it wrong! |
Surfin's PlunderBunny
Blue Republic
RvB - BLUE Republic
1591
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Posted - 2012.06.27 16:59:00 -
[9] - Quote
Ok here's a joke, 2 Amarrians walk into a bar carrying a brutor on their shoulders. The bartender looks at them and asks "Is this a joke?" |
Xercodo
Disturbed Friends Of Diazepam
Dark Matter Coalition
1156
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:03:00 -
[10] - Quote
Roc Wieler wrote:While training to be Dusters, an Amarr and a Caldari jump from a dropship in low atmosphere. Both forgot their parachutes. Which hits first?
The answer? Who cares?
Yes, this joke is incredibly funny to Minmatar everywhere.
They use inertial dampeners built into their suits.
The Drake is a Lie |
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ISD Dorrim Barstorlode
ISD Community Communications Liaisons
27
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:05:00 -
[11] - Quote
What do you call a null sec fleet in a wormhole?
Trapped.
ISD Dorrim Barstorlode
Ensign
Community Communication Liasions (CCLs)
Interstellar Services Department |
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Christopher Dulson
Royal Amarr Institute
Amarr Empire
40
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:06:00 -
[12] - Quote
Normal Joke
A horse walks into a bar and the barman says "why the long face"
The horse says "because i have Cancer"
Eve version
A horse walks into a bar and the barman says "why the long face"
The horse sayw "because i have space Cancer"
(Karn Dulake approves this message) |
Teinyhr
A Club for Reputable Gentlemen
38
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:09:00 -
[13] - Quote
These two player avatars walk in to a virtual bar.... |
Nostradamouse Riraille
Blackreach.
SRS.
32
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:45:00 -
[14] - Quote
Damn, where is my corpmate with all his "yo mamma so fat" jokes about eve...? |
Ottersmacker
Genos Occidere
HYDRA RELOADED
166
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:48:00 -
[15] - Quote
A pirate with a warp disruptor attacks a missioner with a warp drive stabilizer. The missioner warps away. The pirate finds him later and attacks him again but the missioner once again warps out.
The missioner asks "Why do you keep attacking me?"
The pirate replies, "I'm not sure now, I'm starting to think this might be.. ~* pointless *~"
(ba dum tish, shameless repost i know, not taking credit)
The Order of the Falcon or Hin +ˇslenska f+ílkaor+¦a is a national Order of Iceland |
Carmine Terriv
The Faction
0
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:52:00 -
[16] - Quote
In Soviet Timezone, ISK buys you!
-------------------------------------------------
Simple Steps to Complex Problems |
Lin-Young Borovskova
Science and Trade Institute
Caldari State
378
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:55:00 -
[17] - Quote
Op
You joke makes me feel like this 
Try again !
brb |
stoicfaux
1170
|
Posted - 2012.06.27 17:57:00 -
[18] - Quote
RomeStar wrote:I will start
What does the Bermuda Triangle and Goons have in common?
They've both swallowed a lot of seamen.
Sigh. At least have the courtesy to try.
Q: Why are Goonswarm members some of the brightest individuals in the known galaxy?
A: Because of the amount of sunshine blown up their arses by Mittens.
Disclaimer: Nowhere is it written that humor has to be funny.
You can tell me what is and isn't Truth when you pry the tinfoil from my cold, lifeless head.
|
Joe Hinken
Cetan Consortium
3
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Posted - 2012.06.27 17:58:00 -
[19] - Quote
Ottersmacker wrote:A pirate with a warp disruptor attacks a missioner with a warp drive stabilizer. The missioner warps away. The pirate finds him later and attacks him again but the missioner once again warps out.
The missioner asks "Why do you keep attacking me?"
The pirate replies, "I'm not sure now, I'm starting to think this might be.. ~* pointless *~"
(ba dum tish, shameless repost i know, not taking credit)
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 
EDIT: My contribution:
There was a Caldari pilot, a Gallente pilot and a Damsel sitting together in an InterBus shuttle going through Essence. The shuttle's pilot made an apologetic announcement that the passenger lighting was faulty and may go out for periods of time during their journey.
Right on cue, the shuttle lights went out and it was completely dark.
Then there was a kissing sound, followed by the sound of a really loud *SLAP*. When the lights came back on, the Damsel and the Caldari pilot were sitting as if nothing had happened, and the Gallente had a nasty red slap mark on his face.
The Gallente guy was thinking: "The Caldari fella must have kissed the Damsel and she missed him and slapped me instead."
The Damsel was thinking: "The Gallente fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Caldari fella and got slapped for it."
The Caldari pilot was thinking: "This is great. The next time the power goes out, I'll make another kissing noise and slap that Gallente guy again." |
stoicfaux
1170
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Posted - 2012.06.27 18:06:00 -
[20] - Quote
Newbie: Faction Warfare, is it fun?
Goonswarm Vet: Our CFJ just loves it!
Newbie: CFJ?
Goonswarm Vet: Chief Financial Jew.
Disclaimer: Humor doesn't have to be funny to everyone.
You can tell me what is and isn't Truth when you pry the tinfoil from my cold, lifeless head.
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Possum's Awesome
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo
34
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Posted - 2012.06.27 18:11:00 -
[21] - Quote
ISD
Possum's Awesome : Awesome Possum
Unjustly accused and condemned for his crimes. |
stoicfaux
1170
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Posted - 2012.06.27 18:15:00 -
[22] - Quote
Possum's Awesome wrote:ISD
Q: How many ISDs does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Thread locked. Discussion about forum moderation is not allowed.
You can tell me what is and isn't Truth when you pry the tinfoil from my cold, lifeless head.
|
Dark Assassin15
Failed Diplomacy
64
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Posted - 2012.06.27 18:52:00 -
[23] - Quote
Knock Knock, who cares ?
[img]http://www.invokemethod.com/repo/failedsig.png[/img] |
Ssakaa
Murientor Tribe
Defiant Legacy
201
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Posted - 2012.06.27 19:18:00 -
[24] - Quote
Q. Why did the chicken double-cross the road?
A. It was an Ammatar chicken.
*tumbleweed*
Prawnscape: Torment |
El Puerco
Abh Academy
Abh Alliance
10
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Posted - 2012.06.27 19:31:00 -
[25] - Quote
A room full of goons up to their chin in ****. what's wrong?
Not enough ****.
:P
Errare humanum est. |
Ohanka
Aggressive Narcissists
SpaceMonkey's Alliance
162
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Posted - 2012.06.27 19:39:00 -
[26] - Quote
i find it humerous because the goons are the butt of the joke.
Other than that.
its poor |
Malphilos
State War Academy
Caldari State
126
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Posted - 2012.06.27 19:54:00 -
[27] - Quote
Soon. |
Gaellia Bonaventure
Royal Amarr Institute
Amarr Empire
72
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:03:00 -
[28] - Quote
What did the Amarr slave say as his master was whipping him for stealing a handful of rice?
Nothing, because Amarr slaves can't speak with their lips sewn shut.
(this cracks 'em up at your local Amarr pub)
Bring your possibles. |
Devious Relation
Brutor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
20
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:06:00 -
[29] - Quote
Eve is the joke sir, eve is the joke...... |
Devious Relation
Brutor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
20
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:08:00 -
[30] - Quote
Caldari women are like the crust..... everyone touches them but nobody wants them |
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Joe Hinken
Cetan Consortium
7
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:22:00 -
[31] - Quote
A Gallente Iteron IV was descending for a landing at a Jita Station they had never been to before. The pilot looked out the windshield and suddenly exclaimed to his copilot,"Holy Stuff! Look how short that runway is! I've never seen one so short!"
The copilot looked out the windshield. "Wow! you're right! That's insane! Are you sure we can make it?"
"Well we better, were almost out of fuel."
So the captain got on the intercom and notified the station to prepare for anemergency landing. Then he set the flaps to full down and slowed the ship to just over stall speed.
The Iteron came screaming in, on the ragged edge of control. The pilot's hands were sweating, the copilot was praying. They touched down and came screeching to a halt JUST before the edge of the runway, the tires smoking.
"Whew! That was close!" yelled the captain." That runway was short!"
"Yeah!" said the copilot,"and wide too!" |
Xavier Kaine
Valeth Imperial Command
Black Core Alliance
22
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:31:00 -
[32] - Quote
yo momma's so fat, when she goes to buy groceries your dad has to light a cyno.
stole that one from my ceo |
BuckStrider
Nano-Tech Experiments
72
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:36:00 -
[33] - Quote
ISD Dorrim Barstorlode wrote:What do you call a null sec fleet in a wormhole?
Trapped.
How does an ISD guy make a funny joke about EVE?
He rips it off from the WH guy's presentation at EVE Fanfest 2012 |
lanyaie
424
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:43:00 -
[34] - Quote
What do you call..aah **** it I'm going to bed
I dont post often, but when I do i'm probably trolling you Currently offering 100% legit hulkageddon security sponsored by the mittani, send 50m to me and 50m to him |
Mike Azariah
Gallente Benevolence Association
Greater Realms
201
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Posted - 2012.06.27 20:56:00 -
[35] - Quote
"Knock knock"
"For gods sake, stop that, you know I can't open the door"
m |
Ursula Thrace
Red Federation
RvB - RED Federation
71
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Posted - 2012.06.27 21:52:00 -
[36] - Quote
Mike Azariah wrote:"Knock knock"
"For gods sake, stop that, you know I can't open the door"
ok, that was pretty funny.
Eve Online Original Intro |
Veronica Kerrigan
Hand Of Midas
My Other Laboratory is a Distillery
33
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Posted - 2012.06.27 21:52:00 -
[37] - Quote
I saw a brutor tribesman carrying a TV down the street, and I thought to myself "Did someone steal mine?!" Then I remembered, mine was at home, mowing the lawn.
A goon and a pig walk into a bar. The bartender says "What are you doing, bringing that filth in my fine establishment." The pig replies "My apologies fine sir, I will tie it up outside." |
Christopher Dulson
Royal Amarr Institute
Amarr Empire
41
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Posted - 2012.06.27 21:55:00 -
[38] - Quote
A twink walks into a bar and the barman says "Hi Mittans" |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
51
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:04:00 -
[39] - Quote
Xavier Kaine wrote:yo momma's so fat, when she goes to buy groceries your dad has to light a cyno.
stole that one from my ceo
Also...
Yo momma's so fat, they won't let her dock in stations anymore.
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
rodyas
Tie Fighters Inc
521
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:18:00 -
[40] - Quote
Why did the hilmar cross the road?
The kind of funny answer only costs 5 million ISK.
The Most funny one will cost ya 5,000 Aurum.
I will not be voting in the CSM election, so you need to go vote to make up for me. |
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Arcturus Archangel
Sons of Michael
81
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:23:00 -
[41] - Quote
Yo momma so fat, she cant fit inside a freighter.
Corporations and their Interstellar Kredits are soon parted. |
Ila Dace
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
51
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:28:00 -
[42] - Quote
There once was a miner from Azer
Who had not the grid for a laser
His drones pulled the Veld
While his shields barely held
And Goons took him out with a razor
If House played Eve: http://i.imgur.com/y7ShT.jpg |
Sekket
Dissident Aggressors
Mordus Angels
22
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:28:00 -
[43] - Quote
Surfin's PlunderBunny wrote:There's no sea in spaCe
Oh the irony.
- CQ isn't a refuge, it's a cage.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iu4iekX3WE |
Eugene Kerner
TunDraGon
62
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:37:00 -
[44] - Quote
A lanky Caldari walks into a bar...
The bartender asks, "why the long face?"
The Caldari, incapable of understanding the concept of humor,
draws his sidearm and shoots the bartender in the face.
(not taking credit for it...) |
Eugene Kerner
TunDraGon
62
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Posted - 2012.06.28 06:38:00 -
[45] - Quote
Ila Dace wrote:There once was a miner from Azer
Who had not the grid for a laser
His drones pulled the Veld
While his shields barely held
And Goons took him out with a razor
wonderful |
Chokichi Ozuwara
Royal One Piece Corporation
Deadly Unknown
347
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Posted - 2012.06.28 07:36:00 -
[46] - Quote
Yo Momma so fat, every time she logs on, she triggers time dilation.
Yo Momma so fat, first time she saw a Providence, she called it a Twinkie.
Tears will be shed and pants will need to be changed all round. |
Joelleaveek
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
58
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Posted - 2012.06.28 07:55:00 -
[47] - Quote
A horse and a pirate walk into a bar..... i forget the rest but your mother is a *****. |
Cloned S0ul
Blood Fanatics
154
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Posted - 2012.06.28 10:29:00 -
[48] - Quote
Fang Khan: Davion, what's the difference between a pulse laser and a beam laser?
Davion Vrynn: Pulse laser goes "pew, pew, pew" and beam laser goes "zzzzzttttttttt"
Fang Khan: Thank you for the kindergarten version of that explanat...
Source EvE Bash
Teemo for president. |
TheBreadMuncher
Boxxed Up Industries
EPIC Alliance
140
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Posted - 2012.06.28 10:49:00 -
[49] - Quote
A new ISD walks into the forums.
All hell breaks loose.
"We will create the introduction thread if that is requested by the community. Also, we will have an ISD Seminar about the CCL team in the coming weeks in which you can ask your questions about the CCL team and provide some constructive feedback to us." - Countless pages of locked threads and numerous permabanned accounts later, change is coming. |
Barrak
Blue Republic
RvB - BLUE Republic
42
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Posted - 2012.06.28 10:50:00 -
[50] - Quote
Yo mamma's so fat...... but it's okay, she's got plenty of space for fuel. |
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Destiny Corrupted
Deadly Viper Kitten Mitten Sewing Company
699
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Posted - 2012.06.28 10:55:00 -
[51] - Quote
ISD Dorrim Barstorlode wrote:What do you call a null sec fleet in a wormhole?
Trapped.
Hahahahaha!
Can I have my money now?
(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST) |
Lilliana Stelles
Mindstar Technology
Executive Outcomes
55
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Posted - 2012.06.28 10:59:00 -
[52] - Quote
How do you double the value of minmatar capital?
Fill the fuel bay.
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pussnheels
434
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Posted - 2012.06.28 12:02:00 -
[53] - Quote
Did you know that all minmatar pilots are all jediknights
They use ductape as their force
For it has a darkside and asticky side
I do not agree with what you are saying , but i will defend to the death your right to say it...... Voltaire |
Pinstar Colton
Sweet Asteroid Acres
150
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Posted - 2012.06.28 12:02:00 -
[54] - Quote
How do you seduce a Caldari woman?
Show her your stock portfolio, complete with a substantial and diversified set of assets.
How do you seduce a Gallente woman?
Tell her you are Caldari but wish to 'join' her after all, in a way that is frowned upon by the Caldari state standards for intercourse.
How do you seduce an Amarr woman?
Offer to be on the bottom.
How do you seduce a Minmatar woman?
Find one in an unhappy marriage and offer to 'free her' from it.
In the cat-and-mouse game that is low sec, there is no shame in learning to be a better mouse. |
Alissa Solette
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
4
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Posted - 2012.06.28 12:11:00 -
[55] - Quote
Joe Hinken wrote:So the captain got on the intercom and notified the station to prepare for anemergency landing. Then he set the flaps to full down and slowed the ship to just over stall speed.
Space ships can't stall!
I request that your pilots licence be rescinded this instant! |
Toshiroma McDiesel
Lupus Draconis
Dragehund
31
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Posted - 2012.06.28 13:38:00 -
[56] - Quote
Yo momma so fat, she plugs black holes.
The Valdspar is Holy, it must be allowed to float free. Free of lesser rocks that try to clutter it's Holy Path though the Heavens. |
Veronica Kerrigan
Hand Of Midas
My Other Laboratory is a Distillery
35
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Posted - 2012.06.28 14:28:00 -
[57] - Quote
How much EHP does an avatar have? Depends on how many ragnaroks are on field. |
Lin-Young Borovskova
Science and Trade Institute
Caldari State
378
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Posted - 2012.06.28 14:39:00 -
[58] - Quote
So far in this thread there's nothing really funny as Eve joke.
There's the "door" and the "window", "lag" too, but no one can make a good joke about these 
brb |
Tao Arnst
Republic Military School
Minmatar Republic
32
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Posted - 2012.06.28 14:39:00 -
[59] - Quote
Inferno
.....now thats the biggest joke....
Most people embrace GOOD change
Parasites embrace BAD change
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pussnheels
437
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Posted - 2012.06.29 14:15:00 -
[60] - Quote
Did you know that caldari ships are made in italy and only have four control buttons
Button 1 mova da ship
Button 2 stoppa da ship
Button 3 fire da missiles
Button 4 boosta da shields
I do not agree with what you are saying , but i will defend to the death your right to say it...... Voltaire |
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