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An Open Letter to Sir Molle: The Road Back to Revelance

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Xystance Caldari Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:38:00 - [1] Hello Sir Molle, I've recently resigned my commission as Military Director of the Goonswarm Federation renter Test Alliance Please Ignore. Additionally I've resigned my position as Skymarshal of the Fountain invasion due to gross competence and success on the battlefield, both of which are completely unacceptable for our alliance. While I am looking forward to a break from revamping and managing internal alliance logistics, encouraging fleet participation, reimbursing losses, coordinating military assaults, deciding which systems to take... taking them, speaking with allies, you know... All the stuff that goes into running a successful military operations, I realized this is an opportunity. I noticed you're having some issues with FC participation (the lack of), the coordination of activities between your two major engagement fronts, making sure your capital pilots are in the right positions, and keeping your pet alliances happy, engaged, and motivated. I'd like to offer my help. While TEST alliance is best alliance, I feel I can help bring IT into a new age, An age where we can motivate people through encouragement and social rewards instead of threatening them, An age where we can treat our pets as valuable assets instead of worthless cannon fodder, An age where we value our allies as vital components to an overall military strategy instead of turning our backs on them, An age where we aren't afraid to use our overwhelming capital, supercapital, and titan advantage because our subcapital fleet is incapable of living on the field for more than a few minutes, ... and many many more. While I have many valuable action items I'd like to bring to your attention, I'd only like the following in return. - The In-game title: Admiral of the Maverick Navy - A monthly allowance of 1 billion: I can make my own isk and buy my own ships, but if you'd like me to spend my time getting our CEOs in line and our people motivated, I may not be able to make enough isk to actually log into the game - The keys to the oil tanker budoir you currently house Lady Scarlet in so I may see her, pay my respects, apologize for any comments my alliance has made about her in the past, and keep her bathed and clean on a daily basis as to not let any more "issues" develop. - The authority to use our liquid assets to commission the manufacture of sovereignty structures and ships for the benefit of our alliances and pets. No access to any holding corps is necessary, I'm not looking to scam after all, but a modest payment to an alliance wallet would make things easier. I believe we can re-make IT Alliance into a force to be reckoned with again. Also I'm a swinger, and the four of us would make a beautiful "team".
Alina Wize Caldari Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:43:00 - [2] we'll miss you <3
Headerman Minmatar Metanoia. Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:44:00 - [3] I have free ice cream and a balloon for each IT member if i am accepted as Xystance's right hand man.... if you know what i mean ;) I DO know how to motivate people to win.
Rick Rothsar Minmatar Ghosts of Ragnarok Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:47:00 - [4] Originally by: Xystance Also I'm a swinger, and the four of us would make a beautiful "team". this is as personal as it will ever get
zero9300 Caldari Autistic Sharks Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:47:00 - [5] I will do it for half the allowance, no title, and without the keys to your life partner.
BoodaBooda Minmatar Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:49:00 - [6] Edited by: BoodaBooda on 11/01/2011 23:49:46 So what you're saying here is... LadyScarlet is fat.
Levarr Burton Gallente B0rthole Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:52:00 - [7] As one of TEST Alliance's brave and marginally-competent Gamma Commanders Who Even Sometimes Log In, I too offer my assistance to IT in their rebuilding. I would be willing to instruct your current FCs in advanced tactics including, but not limited to, my highly acclaimed instructional courses "When to not primary Drakes" (Spoiler: Is there something not a Drake? Don't primary Drake) and "Making sure everyone has the POS password before I fleet warp to it." I would try to make my courses fit as well as possible with your current command doctrine, and as such I wouldn't need a monthly isk stipend. Adopting your "don't log in unless it's Euro-prime and there's no timers coming out and nobody will ask you to FC anyways" doctrine will lower my ship expenses considerably. I would however like the title "Supreme Overseer of All Things" and POS roles, the latter purely to set up a glistening sphere dedicated to me and me only. Also, Xystance and I make a great tag-team, if you know what I mean. In ur engineering, fixin' ur warp core.
Tidanis Gallente Did I just do that Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:54:00 - [8] Edited by: Tidanis on 11/01/2011 23:57:10 Edited by: Tidanis on 11/01/2011 23:56:23 Edited by: Tidanis on 11/01/2011 23:55:19 I also offer my service to the alliance of IT and their pets. I have 17mil isk and I can help I can dance if I want to I know how to follow primaries I'm not afraid of using a subcap fleet in the face of overwhelming odds I'm part of BEST KOREA: hail the GREAT LEADER I can post on the forums unlike most of your alliance I can type long drawn out lists This line doesn't start with an "I" I'm currently docked in TN-T, so I'm pretty close to your borders I have some items in your region I would love to retrieve so I'm isk motivated I know how to titan bridge I show up to fleets and can fly logistics: unlike your alliance I still have 3357 characters left to post I hope you haven't read this far I was recruiter once so I can make IT gain members instead of lose them at epic proportions I also know that having a high tax rate is disastrous on an alliance. If you want people to log in at home: give them incentives to do so. I make a lot of funny-to-me posts on our alliance forums. I see nothing but rage on yours[/*] I also dig fat chicks - with a shovel[/list] Ok, I'm done: Hello Kitty EZ-Bake ovens for all participants. Just send your 5mil isk to this character and I'll send you some pizza rolls and an EZ bake oven in the mail. -------------------------------------------- Currently Training: Avoiding Homework, Level 4
Genorator Gallente Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:56:00 - [9] Originally by: BoodaBooda Edited by: BoodaBooda on 11/01/2011 23:49:46 So what you're saying here is... LadyScarlet is fat. We're not saying that, we're just saying she has her own sov tower. And if you anchor a pos on her you could crush the market with the amount of petroleum and methane you'd mine off of her.
Gerard Gendri Gallente Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.11 23:58:00 - [10] [move][/move]
Tidanis Gallente Did I just do that Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:00:00 - [11] Originally by: Gerard Gendri [move][/move] I'd upvote you if I could. -------------------------------------------- Currently Training: Avoiding Homework, Level 4
Vasili Z Minmatar Cosmic Odyssey BricK sQuAD.	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:10:00 - [12] Originally by: Xystance An age where we can motivate people through encouragement and social rewards instead of threatening them, An age where we can treat our pets as valuable assets instead of worthless cannon fodder, An age where we value our allies as vital components to an overall military strategy instead of turning our backs on them, pansy ------- Going to kill you in Dust 514 (wait a minute, micro-transactions are dumb)
Noir Avlaa Amarr Therapy. Wildly Inappropriate.	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:11:00 - [13] Edited by: Noir Avlaa on 12/01/2011 00:11:38 Originally by: Tidanis I can dance if I want to Can you leave your friends behind?
SMT008 Caldari Les chevaliers de l'ordre Wildly Inappropriate.	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:12:00 - [14] Poasting in a TEST Thread, just to check if it works or not ? BUT THIS IS NOW A WIDOT THREAD, NO MATTER WHAT, NO QUESTION ASKED ! (And I can probably dance, never checked)
ovenproofjet Caldari Therapy. Wildly Inappropriate.	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:13:00 - [15] Edited by: ovenproofjet on 12/01/2011 00:13:58 Originally by: Noir Avlaa Edited by: Noir Avlaa on 12/01/2011 00:11:38 Originally by: Tidanis I can dance if I want to Can you leave your friends behind? Because his friends don't dance?
Headerman Minmatar Metanoia. Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:16:00 - [16] Originally by: ovenproofjet Edited by: ovenproofjet on 12/01/2011 00:13:58 Originally by: Noir Avlaa Edited by: Noir Avlaa on 12/01/2011 00:11:38 Originally by: Tidanis I can dance if I want to Can you leave your friends behind? Because his friends don't dance? Well if they don't dance
Tez Saurus Amarr Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:22:00 - [17] What the **** is revelance.
Soldarius Caldari Northstar Cabal R.A.G.E	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:27:00 - [18] Confirming, TEST thread is BEST thread. Originally by: CCP Shadow ...I cannot guarantee (my) sobriety or decency.
Talon Reese Minmatar Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:32:00 - [19] Originally by: Headerman Originally by: ovenproofjet Edited by: ovenproofjet on 12/01/2011 00:13:58 Originally by: Noir Avlaa Edited by: Noir Avlaa on 12/01/2011 00:11:38 Originally by: Tidanis I can dance if I want to Can you leave your friends behind? Because his friends don't dance? Well if they don't dance Then there no friends of mine.
John Fandango Caldari Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 00:33:00 - [20] Originally by: Gerard Gendri [move][/move] I didn't know Gerard was Xystance's alt.
Vasentic Gallente Lyonesse. Wildly Inappropriate.	Posted - 2011.01.12 01:04:00 - [21] Originally by: Talon Reese Then there no friends of mine. I say, we can go where we want to.
Alina Wize Caldari Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 01:08:00 - [22] Revelance best lance
Cibo Matto Gallente Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 01:58:00 - [23] Originally by: SMT008 Poasting in a TEST Thread, just to check if it works or not ? BUT THIS IS NOW A WIDOT THREAD, NO MATTER WHAT, NO QUESTION ASKED ! (And I can probably dance, never checked) In before...GodDAMNIT!
Tidanis Gallente Did I just do that Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 02:17:00 - [24] Originally by: Talon Reese+ others... I can dance if I want to Can you leave your friends behind? Because his friends don't dance? Well if they don't dance Then there no friends of mine. I love you guys. The forums don't allow pyramid quoting i guess. and here's the song for the uniformed: Safety Dance -------------------------------------------- Currently Training: Avoiding Homework, Level 4
Konor Krzyzek Minmatar Dreddit Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 02:35:00 - [25] Originally by: Tidanis and here's the song for the uniformed: Safety Dance And the best uniform is the uniform you wear while doing the Safety Dance.
Noir Avlaa Amarr Therapy. Wildly Inappropriate.	Posted - 2011.01.12 02:37:00 - [26] Edited by: Noir Avlaa on 12/01/2011 02:39:24 Hey has anyone got an updated cloud ring JB map? Mine's all wrong! :(
ovenproofjet Caldari Therapy. Wildly Inappropriate.	Posted - 2011.01.12 02:54:00 - [27] Originally by: Noir Avlaa Edited by: Noir Avlaa on 12/01/2011 02:39:24 Hey has anyone got an updated cloud ring JB map? Mine's all wrong! :( I have one here for IT dude!
Easley Thames Gallente The Maverick Navy IT Alliance	Posted - 2011.01.12 03:32:00 - [28] My title? Dramiels at dawn, usurper! Actually, considering all I do is troll the rest of our leadership maybe it would make sense to let you fill in for a while. ---
Aerious Caldari Martyr's Vengence Test Alliance Please Ignore	Posted - 2011.01.12 07:50:00 - [29] Originally by: Easley Thames Edited by: Easley Thames on 12/01/2011 04:55:56 My title? Dramiels at dawn, usurper! Edit - Considering I spend most of my time trolling the rest of our leadership, maybe it would make sense to let you fill in for a while. I am Aerious of TEST. Resistance is futile. Your life, as it has been is over. From this time forward, You will service us!
Easley Thames Gallente The Maverick Navy IT Alliance	Posted - 2011.01.12 08:09:00 - [30] Originally by: Aerious Originally by: Easley Thames Edited by: Easley Thames on 12/01/2011 04:55:56 My title? Dramiels at dawn, usurper! Edit - Considering I spend most of my time trolling the rest of our leadership, maybe it would make sense to let you fill in for a while. I am Aerious of TEST. Resistance is futile. Your life, as it has been is over. From this time forward, You will service us! Darmok and Jilad at Tanagra. ---

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