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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:32:00 -
[1]
I love Eve, always have and if left alone in a room with my shiny pc and eve, can be stuck playing the game for hours on end.....
.....this is what it was like 3 yrs ago....until i met a woman!!!!
Eve playing continued and things were ok until she was getting a little bit jealous of my relationship with eve, arguments ensued and in the end the vile female one and my eve account was cancelled 
Anyway back to present day, i still have the eve bug and have started out again with a trial account, now i have managed to play about twice for a good few hours and have got the bug back so want to subscribe again but how do i run it passed the missus? How can i let her know that she comes first and eve comes a (very very close) 2nd? She doesnt believe me and hates/doesn't understand mmorpgs anyway.
I want to continue playing and would like to dedicate at least an hour a night to my beloved eve without my partner overeacting and thinking im having a love affair with my computer!!
Any help would be much appreciated!! Er.....SIGNATURE |

Jaikar Isillia
The Vinlanders Dark Matter Coalition
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:36:00 -
[2]
2/10.
Old and unoriginal.
2 point's for being addicted to eve though.
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Patch86
Di-Tron Heavy Industries Atlas Alliance
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:36:00 -
[3]
Option 1: Get a girlfriend who isn't anally retentive about video games. Option 2: Make sure you only play in your FREE time, and not when she's after your attention. Option 3: Find something she spends an hour a day doing, and bring it up whenever she tries to yell. Option 4: Get her addicted to EVE (or another game) to level the playing field. Option 5: Eunuch. You know it makes sense. --------
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:37:00 -
[4]
It might be old and unoriginal but that doesn't detract from the fact that its still a common problem that has had no solution!! Er.....SIGNATURE |

sableye
principle of motion Interstellar Alcohol Conglomerate
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:39:00 -
[5]
tell her your studying mmorgs to write a book she might thinkyour doing something useful with your time.
Join The Fight With Promo Today |

The Rincewind
Reign in Blood Hydra Alliance
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:41:00 -
[6]
Edited by: The Rincewind on 09/07/2007 13:42:31
Originally by: Ruddnic I love Eve, always have and if left alone in a room with my shiny pc and eve, can be stuck playing the game for hours on end.....
.....this is what it was like 3 yrs ago....until i met a woman!!!!
Eve playing continued and things were ok until she was getting a little bit jealous of my relationship with eve, arguments ensued and in the end the vile female one and my eve account was cancelled
My condolence, it goes me exactly that way :((
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:42:00 -
[7]
what im trying to get across is:
1.hasn't anyone else out there had/dealt with this problem? 2.How did you deal with it/get around it?
  Er.....SIGNATURE |

sableye
principle of motion Interstellar Alcohol Conglomerate
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:44:00 -
[8]
Originally by: Ruddnic what im trying to get across is:
1.hasn't anyone else out there had/dealt with this problem? 2.How did you deal with it/get around it?
 
I had the problem me and my GF broke up I'd like to say it was'nt due toeve but I know it was :/
Join The Fight With Promo Today |

Death Kill
Caldari direkte
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:45:00 -
[9]
Try slipping some drugs in her soda when you play EVE.
Originally by: myself The Amarr templar joke is a joke stupid people can laugh at. Its the joke any dumb person can laugh at.
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:47:00 -
[10]
Originally by: sableye
Originally by: Ruddnic what im trying to get across is:
1.hasn't anyone else out there had/dealt with this problem? 2.How did you deal with it/get around it?
 
I had the problem me and my GF broke up I'd like to say it was'nt due toeve but I know it was :/
Thats what im trying to avoid Er.....SIGNATURE |

sableye
principle of motion Interstellar Alcohol Conglomerate
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:51:00 -
[11]
Originally by: Ruddnic
Originally by: sableye
Originally by: Ruddnic what im trying to get across is:
1.hasn't anyone else out there had/dealt with this problem? 2.How did you deal with it/get around it?
 
I had the problem me and my GF broke up I'd like to say it was'nt due toeve but I know it was :/
Thats what im trying to avoid
I don'nt think its really possible, she either does'nt care about youplaying or if she does it willslowly grind on her, of course you can get around this by only playing occasionally but thats hard eve is a very intensive mmorg.
The only other way is to get them to play eve with you, but thats extremly tough as most women don'nt like sci-fi and spaceships in fact he momant you mention spaceships it seems to repulse them :) maybe ambulation will help with this ccp really need todo ambulaton right though.
Join The Fight With Promo Today |

Ringleader
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:53:00 -
[12]
Turn on the tv and select Operah.. then go sit in front of you computer.
But seriously. You both have hobbies? do you tell her what hobbies she can have or not? So why should she decided your hobbies?
Just make sure you are smooth about it and not play 24/7 and specially not when she wants attention.
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Mallikanth
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:55:00 -
[13]
Edited by: Mallikanth on 09/07/2007 13:55:06 I play when the wife is getting her fix of TV soaps. Works for us (Mostly)

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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:57:00 -
[14]
I think its that she doesn't understand that its a hobby. All she thinks is - Arrrgh computers oh no my partner is going to turn into a geek, wear glasses and **** himself in front of the pc as he cant be arsed to leave the game and use the loo. I have tried telling her otherwise but there doesnt seem to be any further clarity for her.
Oh and just to add im not a 16 year old with a crush on a schoolgirl, im 24, have 3 kids and have lived with my partner for 2 and a half years now. Er.....SIGNATURE |

Tarminic
Black Flame Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.09 13:59:00 -
[15]
Actions speak louder than words - if you want to show her that she's more important than EVE, well, show her. Spending time on EVE isn't the problem, it's when you do that at the expense of your job, chores, or relationships that will annoy the hell out of your lady (trust me ).
1. Do little things to remind her that she's still number one in your life. Send her an e-card on occasion for starters, even if it's something small with just a one-line message. Suprise her by doing some chore that is usually hers to take care of, things like that. 2. Realize that if you're going to do this the things you can do in eve are somewhat limited by the amount of time you will or will not be able to commit. Don't promise an alliance to show up to seige some POSes if you know your lady friend will not like you sitting at a computer for hours deconstructing a POS. 3. Try to orient your activities in EVE so that you can stop them fairly quickly if you need to. A.K.A. if you know that you and your lady friend are planning on going somewhere that night, don't delay your departure because you just wanted to clear one last belt in EVE, this will annoy the hell out of her.
Keep those three things in mind and you should be fine. 
*Link removed from signature - not appropriate for Eve Forums teen rating - Timmeh* IBTL! IBDS/DC! IBTC! 1st in a BoB post! And other such forum tom-foolery. |

ApaKaka
Lone Starr Corporation
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:00:00 -
[16]
1. Get her a job 2. Quit your job 3. Play Eve for the blissful 8 hours she's gone, then pay attention to her when she gets home.
She pays bills, you play Eve.
You win.
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Needa3
Minmatar Templars of Space Sparta Alliance
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:01:00 -
[17]
Originally by: Patch86 Option 1: Get a girlfriend who isn't anally retentive about video games. Option 2: Make sure you only play in your FREE time, and not when she's after your attention. Option 3: Find something she spends an hour a day doing, and bring it up whenever she tries to yell. Option 4: Get her addicted to EVE (or another game) to level the playing field. Option 5: Eunuch. You know it makes sense.
1) rather difficult. Although i met some nice women in eve, computer games are generally a male dominated envirement
2) good point
3) will never work. Ever tried resoning against a woman? Especially with pointing out their weaknesses ... will get you instapopped
4) I tried, I failed... she just doesn't get it. Learning curve to steep, boring first month and generally doesn't see what we (eve players) like in the game
Best is to make a deal in which you say that you want to play the game for like an hour/ day or so. She will understand. After that hour you can say you'll be hers for the rest of the evening/ day
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Fog Render
Mirage Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:04:00 -
[18]
the answer is simple.
Marry her. Then when she complains, remind her who is boss in the family.
Getting a divorce is a hassle, maybe she'll put it off for a few years, by that time you'll have had enough of eve.
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Tarminic
Black Flame Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:05:00 -
[19]
Originally by: Fog Render the answer is simple.
Marry her. Then when she complains, remind her who is boss in the family.
Getting a divorce is a hassle, maybe she'll put it off for a few years, by that time you'll have had enough of eve.
Tried it, doesn't work. My wife can complain with her fists.
*Link removed from signature - not appropriate for Eve Forums teen rating - Timmeh* IBTL! IBDS/DC! IBTC! 1st in a BoB post! And other such forum tom-foolery. |

hUssmann
Caldari Veto. Veto Corp
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:06:00 -
[20]
I'm very lucky in having a girlfriend that lets me play EVE.
'At least you're not out getting drunk, taking drugs or sleeping with other women'
Yah, EVE is my only vice. 
Ginger Magician > You are merely an effective ganker of haulers who runs at the first sign of combat. |

Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:15:00 -
[21]
Originally by: Fog Render the answer is simple.
Marry her. Then when she complains, remind her who is boss in the family.
Getting a divorce is a hassle, maybe she'll put it off for a few years, by that time you'll have had enough of eve.
She has already been divorced once so don't think that will help lol.
Nice try though. Er.....SIGNATURE |

Great Artista
Caldari Purple Cloud
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:21:00 -
[22]
I have no social life. (Not because I play eve, but due to the fact that I have hard time giving a crap about other people) _______ Great Artista Co-CEO
My opinions are mine and they are the right ones. Bye. |

MrTriggerHappy
Caldari Interstellar eXodus R0ADKILL
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:26:00 -
[23]
Originally by: Patch86 Option 1: Get a girlfriend who isn't anally retentive about video games. Option 2: Make sure you only play in your FREE time, and not when she's after your attention. Option 3: Find something she spends an hour a day doing, and bring it up whenever she tries to yell. Option 4: Get her addicted to EVE (or another game) to level the playing field. Option 5: Eunuch. You know it makes sense.
You know i had one of these, emphasis the "HAD" it didn't work out too well and I haven't been playing eve properly since November! --------------------------------
My Comments in no way reflect my corp or alliance |

Ealiom
Infinitus Morti R0ADKILL
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:27:00 -
[24]
Comment on the fact that she enjoys watching those crap soaps and reads those soul destroying celeb magazines. Im pretty sure 1 hour of you & eve time is allowed if she can pour time & energy into that sort of hollow timesink.
Im lucky enough to have a fiance who values the concept of having a little space to breathe now and then. Nowadays that times spent playing EVE and CS:S.
She's has recently started playing CS:S with me after work. Try as i might though i cant interest her in EVE!
Executioner Model Blackbird Model |
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GM Voodoo

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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:39:00 -
[25]
You need to have a frank, honest conversation with her about the fact that you enjoy playing games (don't focus on just EVE) and that it is something which makes you happy and lets you relax. Ask her if she would have similar issues if you took up golf or tennis or model ship building or any other hobby which would also mean that you would be spending an hour a day away from her. Gaming is as valid a choice of hobby as any of those, albeit less healthy than the sports option.
Obviously she thinks that the moment you start playing again you will while away all hours of the day in EVE, and given the first line of your post there is a risk that you will veer in that direction again. So you need to make sure that you really do show her, through your actions, that you are putting her first. So if you are playing, you need to stick to your promises and switch off EVE within a certain time period. Perhaps agree to play it while she's watching her soaps (watching TV together is hardly a relationship building experience imho) and have dinner or something once you're done.
This is a problem with many MMO's...actually with gaming in general. While you may be socially active on the screen, the flesh and blood people around you will inevitably feel neglected. The responsible gamer makes sure that friends and family are given the time they need to keep the relationship going. And this includes not talking only about your gaming when you interact with them. Read some books, watch the news, go see movies just do something apart from gaming which will give you something to talk about with non-gamers. It's part of being a healthy, balanced individual.
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:41:00 -
[26]
do i get a reduced subscription fee for only playing for an hour a day lmao  Er.....SIGNATURE |

Tarminic
Black Flame Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:42:00 -
[27]
Originally by: GM Voodoo You need to have a frank, honest conversation with her about the fact that you enjoy playing games (don't focus on just EVE) and that it is something which makes you happy and lets you relax. Ask her if she would have similar issues if you took up golf or tennis or model ship building or any other hobby which would also mean that you would be spending an hour a day away from her. Gaming is as valid a choice of hobby as any of those, albeit less healthy than the sports option.
Obviously she thinks that the moment you start playing again you will while away all hours of the day in EVE, and given the first line of your post there is a risk that you will veer in that direction again. So you need to make sure that you really do show her, through your actions, that you are putting her first. So if you are playing, you need to stick to your promises and switch off EVE within a certain time period. Perhaps agree to play it while she's watching her soaps (watching TV together is hardly a relationship building experience imho) and have dinner or something once you're done.
This is a problem with many MMO's...actually with gaming in general. While you may be socially active on the screen, the flesh and blood people around you will inevitably feel neglected. The responsible gamer makes sure that friends and family are given the time they need to keep the relationship going. And this includes not talking only about your gaming when you interact with them. Read some books, watch the news, go see movies just do something apart from gaming which will give you something to talk about with non-gamers. It's part of being a healthy, balanced individual.
I think we're the only people taking this post seriously.  ------------ LAG - Hopefully teen-appropriate now. IBTL! IBDS/DC! IBTC! 1st in a BoB post! And other such forum tom-foolery. |

Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:48:00 -
[28]
Originally by: Tarminic
Originally by: GM Voodoo You need to have a frank, honest conversation with her about the fact that you enjoy playing games (don't focus on just EVE) and that it is something which makes you happy and lets you relax. Ask her if she would have similar issues if you took up golf or tennis or model ship building or any other hobby which would also mean that you would be spending an hour a day away from her. Gaming is as valid a choice of hobby as any of those, albeit less healthy than the sports option.
Obviously she thinks that the moment you start playing again you will while away all hours of the day in EVE, and given the first line of your post there is a risk that you will veer in that direction again. So you need to make sure that you really do show her, through your actions, that you are putting her first. So if you are playing, you need to stick to your promises and switch off EVE within a certain time period. Perhaps agree to play it while she's watching her soaps (watching TV together is hardly a relationship building experience imho) and have dinner or something once you're done.
This is a problem with many MMO's...actually with gaming in general. While you may be socially active on the screen, the flesh and blood people around you will inevitably feel neglected. The responsible gamer makes sure that friends and family are given the time they need to keep the relationship going. And this includes not talking only about your gaming when you interact with them. Read some books, watch the news, go see movies just do something apart from gaming which will give you something to talk about with non-gamers. It's part of being a healthy, balanced individual.
I think we're the only people taking this post seriously. 
Believe me im serious, just need to get the balance right by the looks of things. Its just difficult trying to talk to her about it because as soon as i mention PC Game or computer then she switches off. Will try though  Er.....SIGNATURE |

Guvnor RBM
Welsh Commanders 3asy Company
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:50:00 -
[29]
Edited by: Guvnor RBM on 09/07/2007 14:54:14 I had the same problem...
a) work from home, she can't be there 24/7 , but you can ! b) Does she drink, Smoke, go out, have friends, ect ect ? ? ? Then ask why she can have her "own" Thing and you can't ?
c) Ask your self is EvE > Sex/love/Company , Then make your mind up...
PS, if shes there just for the company, then ditch her now.
But to be stright, ask your self, are you shunning her for EvE ? I've made that mistake once, got her back and very quickly found my self wanting back EvE. She could sit and watch TV, play lemmings or bull**** on myspace for hours, but I spent 30 secs checking e-mail and there was hell to pay.
Just sit down and ask your self , What do you want ? , what do you need ? can you both come to a understanding ?
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Fink Angel
Caldari The Merry Men
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Posted - 2007.07.09 14:54:00 -
[30]
Edited by: Fink Angel on 09/07/2007 14:53:54
I'm married and only play Eve really casually compared to most people. Some weeks I might play for 10 hours spread over the week, wome weeks barely log in to check training.
If my wife ever has a problem with my gaming, I mention other male friends of ours who go rock climbing a lot or spend every Saturday while the football season is on going to home / away games.
Generally that actually reminds her I'm a pretty reasonable guy.
However I don't think she'd be too pleased with "I can't come out to dinner tonight as I'm signed up for a fleet war / gate camp etc." so I don't play at that "in deep" level.
Swings and roundabouts. I enjoy Eve, and I enjoy my life outside of Eve. But given the choice, Eve would lose.
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Tarminic
Black Flame Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:02:00 -
[31]
I'm somewhat entertained by the fact that the majority of posts in this thread have been oppositional in nature - do you really think trying to armwrestle your spouse into submission is going to work? Unless they're extremely avoidant that will fail miserably, and even if you just bully her into submission she won't be happy and she'll end up leaving you anyway - and if that's your point then just dump her and save you both the trouble.
 
------------ LAG - Hopefully teen-appropriate now. IBTL! IBDS/DC! IBTC! 1st in a BoB post! And other such forum tom-foolery. |

Locus Bey
Gallente Qalandar
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:06:00 -
[32]
Your biggest problem is how much time EVE can consume. If you have kids, a job, wife, etc etc, your time is already limited. By the sounds of it your ability to play EVE other than as a really casual gamer is ziltch. You'll be there waiting for a fleet battle to ensue, grinding through a storyline mission, and she will be on your ass to get off the computer and wash the dishes, dress the kids, come to bed, and so on. "I won't be long," or "this is important," isn't going to wash. Face it your screwed 
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Kalahari Wayrest
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:07:00 -
[33]
I think the problem with MMOs instead of other hobbies that significant others find difficult to deal with is time + immersion. If you're playing for an hour or so a night I don't see a problem - if you can stick to that. And it would be a difficult thing to stick to, as if you get involved in something, or something crops up that needs your attention, or a friend in game needs help...
Because it's such an immersive thing (and fun), time can pass very quickly to the person playing it. (But obviously very slowly to the significant other feeling neglected)So you could spend hours in it and not have realised. Aditionally, it requires a lot of attention unless you're travelling long distances and are going afk a lot. Any kind of fighting is going to require attention, as are any conversations that are going on in corp, gang, etc. It's easy while this is going on to put rl on autopilot because you're so involved, and answer "yes dear" irl, when yes dear really wasn't the correct answer 
If it's got to the point where she's so dead against it, then there's not much you can do really. If she's given you an ultimatum, then that's either your decision made or you should find someone who doesn't give you ultimatums.
But here's what I think anyway:
It's less to do with how much you're playing eve and more to do with how much less time you are spending with her. I think the perception that eve time is cutting into her time is the problem.
tell her when and for how long you'll be playing eve and stick to it
if you can, try and get some of this time to fall when she's doing something else
if you're at any point where you could go afk, don't just get up, go to the toilet, get a drink, and sit back down. Go and give her a hug, tell her snippets of what's been going on, what you've been doing, and try and involve her.
set up a test account for her. might backfire if she's got to the point where she despises them, but then again, it might give her more of an understanding about what you're up to. go through it with her.
set a little time every day, or a lot of time once a week, to spend some quality time with her. It's not really important what you do, just that she feels she's special and warrants some time and attention.
That's all I got. If she won't budge, she won't budge. I'd try being open, honest and managing your time effectively so she doesn't get po'd you're spending it all in eve. Hope it helps. __________________________ Indulge Me Consider Yourself Indulged - Immy ♥ Wow immy scored - Xorus |

Garat Mant
Minmatar Moons of Pluto
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:14:00 -
[34]
Some people spend all their non-work time playing eve. Get home, start eve, finish eve, go to bed. If you're in a relationship with that person, well, it is quite understandable that you'd feel neglected.
Some people spend every waking hour watching TV, or playing golf, or chatting on IRC, or reading blogs. Other people spend all their money on gadgets or cars, or drugs or drinking out at a bar.
For many people, eve is just a computer game. It's not a serious hobby like woodworking or classic car restoration or whatever. It also is related to the other most heinous of crimes, wasting money; you spend money on multiple accounts, upgrading your PC etc etc.
Now there are ways around this source of friction in a relationship. The non-game player can spend time with their friends, take up hobbies, go to evening classes, read, watch TV etc.
Where some problems happen is when one of the people in the relationship have nothing to do with their time, and expect the other to "entertain" them. Especially during summer months, or during a period when the non-eve player doesn't have much going on.
First off, you need to ask yourself "Is what my partner asking reasonable?". If you really are being asked to spend little to no time on the PC, then that is unreasonable. If you have taken care of all the chores, laundry, yardwork and you have spent time with your partner, asked them about their day, talked about their problems and fears, then you can reasonably be expected to spend time doing the things you enjoy.
Do you demonstrate to your partner that you love them? If you are spending all your waking hours obsessing about eve, then they are going to feel second best in your life. My wife knows that eve is a time sink, she knows that skills happen in real time, so sometimes during a TV evening, I may open the laptop (hers!) and fire up eve to change a skill. I also send my wife flowers now and then, chat to her at work, ask her about her day and show interest in her life. Most of the time, she knows that she is the most important thing in my life. Sometimes, she is vulnerable, upset, afraid, and I need to spend an evening, a whole day or weekend, talking to her and letting her know that she is OK.
Your girl needs to know that MMORPGs are a valid way to spend your time.
You need to know that at least an hour a night may be too long, especially if you are neglecting your girl or your responsibilities.
You need to understand that a hobby/eve should absolutely be the lowest priority in your life; Kids/Wife > You > Family/Friends > Home > Work > Hobbies. You need to know that relationships take CONSTANT work, you don't get one and then stop trying, as so many people do.
Digging your heels in and thinking your are right will only lead to one thing, loss of your girl. Compromise, tact, attention are all needed in a relationship. Once you know her friends names, how her work day is going, what she likes and dislikes and her hopes and fears, you're getting somewhere. Then when you've done all your chores, yardwork etc, you're getting further. When after all that, you can sit down with her and say "this game is important to me, it's not even close to you in my priority list, but it's something I enjoy. I want to spend X hours a week doing this, and I think that's fair if I continue to fulfill my responsibilities"
At that point, if she still says no, ask her to leave.
-G
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DarkMatter
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:18:00 -
[35]
Edited by: DarkMatter on 09/07/2007 15:21:55 Well, if you were single and didn't live with or have children with this woman you could have just dumped her for EVE. She certainly would not have been the first woman dumped for an MMO...
Problem is, you do live with this woman and you have had children with her, you have made your bed now you must sleep in it... You have to grow up and be a man now, not a kid...
That bed obviously does not include EVE, or any other MMO for that matter. Looks like you didn't pick well when you picked a woman... Mine has no problems letting me do my own thing, and I let her do hers. We see each other 1-2 days a week or so, and MSN the rest of the time, and that's all we need... It's great...
Building the homestead
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:31:00 -
[36]
Originally by: Garat Mant
At that point, if she still says no, ask her to leave.
-G
Love it!!
Anyway on a serious note...my work takes up a lot of time and (thankfully) money isn't an issue as we both earn comfortable amounts of money. Generally i will play eve in the evnings after dinner and when everyone is relaxing. My partner is the most important thing in my life and if push comes to shove then eve will have to take a backseat. BUT i just want to make her see that it is not this huge ogreish thing that will engulf my life. I just have trouble understanding why this is so hard to do Maybe im goin about it all the wrong way, tonight i will sit down with her after all the chores and other things are done and i will talk it through with her. I will report back here with the results. Watch this space   Er.....SIGNATURE |

Tarminic
Black Flame Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.09 15:35:00 -
[37]
Originally by: Ruddnic BUT i just want to make her see that it is not this huge ogreish thing that will engulf my life. I just have trouble understanding why this is so hard to do Maybe im goin about it all the wrong way, tonight i will sit down with her after all the chores and other things are done and i will talk it through with her. I will report back here with the results. Watch this space  
She probably has a negative association with online games - that would be my guess anyway. Perhaps she knew someone who allowed them to control his/her life, or maybe she's some negative press about them. The best thing you can do is just explain it very reasonably and tell her that if you start playing it more than a certain amount of time per day/week, then she has every right to ask that you stop playing altogether. I think that's your best bet. ------------ LAG - Hopefully teen-appropriate now. IBTL! IBDS/DC! IBTC! 1st in a BoB post! And other such forum tom-foolery. |

Pisi Mopsu
NET Profit Trading
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Posted - 2007.07.09 22:00:00 -
[38]
OMG You sound like the male versio of me. Check out my bio in game sometime. LOL I don't think non-EVE players can really accept the level of addiction we experience... and sometimes even loved ones who play can't accept it.
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Veea Tsunoda
Sanctum's Edge
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Posted - 2007.07.09 22:17:00 -
[39]
I say somehow convince her eve is fun... and lure her into it.... Thats what my boyfriend did to me, and now we have 2 computers side-by-side in my room and play together!! Strange but true. Eve is a fun game I think most woman would like if they gave it a go. Just making the char was fun enough to get me into the game :)
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Shameless Avenger
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Posted - 2007.07.10 03:32:00 -
[40]
OP,
IMHO it all comes down to one thing. A girl needs to know she is more important than EvE. And they don't like to be just above it. They need to know they are *far* more important than the game. In my case, I love my wife deeply. Even if her anti-eve arguments are ridiculous and unfounded, I let her win most of the time because I like to see her happy. Making the wife happy > EvE.
Also keep in mind that some girls don't really care about EvE, MMOs, Games or whatever it is that you are doing. They just hate the fact that you are doing it. Trying to show them any good side of the hobby is futile.
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Lithalnas
Amarr Hadean Drive Yards Archaean Cooperative
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Posted - 2007.07.10 03:55:00 -
[41]
i just had a wonderful idea, EvE online hug pillows/real dolls. Have both the ability to play eve as much as you want and at the same time have a perverted romantic(snicker) obsession.
Im going to make so much money with this... ------------- Hadean Drive Yards The EvE inflation, 80 Macro miners, 1.5b isk/day |

P3109
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Posted - 2007.07.10 06:00:00 -
[42]
Originally by: Ruddnic I love Eve, always have and if left alone in a room with my shiny pc and eve, can be stuck playing the game for hours on end.....
.....this is what it was like 3 yrs ago....until i met a woman!!!!
Eve playing continued and things were ok until she was getting a little bit jealous of my relationship with eve, arguments ensued and in the end the vile female one and my eve account was cancelled 
Anyway back to present day, i still have the eve bug and have started out again with a trial account, now i have managed to play about twice for a good few hours and have got the bug back so want to subscribe again but how do i run it passed the missus? How can i let her know that she comes first and eve comes a (very very close) 2nd? She doesnt believe me and hates/doesn't understand mmorpgs anyway.
I want to continue playing and would like to dedicate at least an hour a night to my beloved eve without my partner overeacting and thinking im having a love affair with my computer!!
Any help would be much appreciated!!
Moved from EVE General Discussion - Ductoris
dude i say that your lucky to have a girl, alot of other pepole would give up eve for a girlfriend......imso lonely

 -------------------------------------------------- Arvald's temporary alt....damn creditcard company not letting me put money on me card >< |

Tony Allizzar
Mortis Angelus
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Posted - 2007.07.10 08:11:00 -
[43]
Once a girlfriend of mine tryed to get a mate of mine to stop me playing eve, by getting me to go out drinking and clubbing all the time. all that actually happened is he now plays eve more than me HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
These days I do not have a problem, I am lucky enough to have a lady who has no problem with me playing. I told her early on about this 'internet game' i play with my 'friends' etc...
she has a very good job which requires her to be still sat at her laptop till 10pm working most evenings, so it really dont bother her.
I gues im lucky.
I would not ever let anybody come between me and something i enjoy. Yes im grown up, im 30 years old, but I realy think that you should not have to stop doing something you enjoy, and i dont mean just eve, could be anything, because some one is telling you to. Its not fair and that person obviously does not respect the person you are or your intrests.
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Christopher Scott
Caldari
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Posted - 2007.07.10 08:11:00 -
[44]
Edited by: Christopher Scott on 10/07/2007 08:14:16 1.) Have great sex with her, make sure she has at least ONE orgasm, or enough for her pass out on your bed/couch/floor. Play EVE as much as you want. Have food and beverages waiting for when she wakes up, she will be hungry.
2.) Play EVE at your friends house. Make her believe you are having "time with the guys."
3.) Play EVE while her favorite TV show is on.
4.) If she wants to lie down and cuddle, then use a body pillow to prop yourself upright while she lies down next to you. When she falls asleep, have a laptop plugged-in and within reach, so you are ready to play eve.
5.) Don't spend too much time on EVE when she approaches her period. That's the time to back off, and spend some quality time with her.
I find those work really well.
------------------------------------ I support the following changes:
Make warp acceleration faster! |

Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.10 11:49:00 -
[45]
Well last night didn't go too well as my better half was pretty ill. Thought it would not be the best time to broach the subject. Maybe i will have a better opportunity tonight.
Will keep you lot updated with the results. Er.....SIGNATURE |

ElrondHubbard
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Posted - 2007.07.10 11:51:00 -
[46]
my gf and i have PCs next to each other so whilst i play computergames, she can play solitaire, talk **** and irritate me.
she thinks it's great :(
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.10 11:54:00 -
[47]
Originally by: ElrondHubbard my gf and i have PCs next to each other so whilst i play computergames, she can play solitaire, talk **** and irritate me.
she thinks it's great :(
The worst thing is we actually have 3 P.C's, 1 Laptop, a PS3, an Xbox and numerous handhelds within the house.
You would think she would be used to it. Hell my boy and girl spend most of their lives glued to the computer and she doesn't moan about them!! Er.....SIGNATURE |

Lucian Alucard
Caldari Black Vice Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.10 11:59:00 -
[48]
If your married,your screwed. Unless you can get her to play as well,then its all good.
The other possibilities are pretty grim.
If she is your girlfriend still then get a new one that likes the things you like or can at least tolerate them,I did it and I am now a happily married aman and I have played for over 3 years. Women are more acceptant of us being addicted to our cars then to a video game which they see as silly and childish and frankly most of the reason why people play is due to the need to escape from the bs and drama of real life. IMO if someone is willing to ditch you or cause a fuss because you like to play a game and won't even make the effort to see why you like it so much then you really shouldn't be with them because frankly they do not care enough to get to understand you better. We all play for different reasons with that said if she wanted to dig to find them out she probably would find issuses that need addressing,the lack of prying is a bad thing inshort.
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The Captian
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Posted - 2007.07.10 12:36:00 -
[49]
Originally by: Ruddnic Generally i will play eve in the evnings after dinner and when everyone is relaxing.
Personaly I see this is where you are going wrong, it's good you are having dinner together and I assume doing the chours together, but you shoukd be spending that time relaxing WITH her.
You will have both had busy days so there will be nothing better that just sitting there with each other, yes you may just be sitting watching the tv but it really is needed.
After this time together go have your hour of EvE or what ever.
But hey what do I know :P |

Tyrannosaurus Alan
Minmatar Republic Military School
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Posted - 2007.07.10 12:43:00 -
[50]
bought my gf an Xbox... it soon shut her up 
==================== I'll 'av you for breakfast! |

ElrondHubbard
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Posted - 2007.07.10 12:58:00 -
[51]
Originally by: Tyrannosaurus Alan bought my gf an Xbox... it soon shut her up 
you beat her to death with the controller?
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Araxmas
The Blue Dagger Mercenery Agency
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Posted - 2007.07.10 13:22:00 -
[52]
Originally by: ElrondHubbard
Originally by: Tyrannosaurus Alan bought my gf an Xbox... it soon shut her up 
you beat her to death with the controller?
haha,
Well my advice is just inject her with a couple of vials of stfu. When she is sleeping have fun with eve. But on a serious note just give her some rohypnol... ...but on the REAL serious note just play eve and pay attention to her when she wants it. Don't just grunt or mutter a yes when she is talking. --------
Robbie Rotten left me |

Kindakrof
Caldari Cruor Frater Coalition of Carebear Killers
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Posted - 2007.07.10 14:23:00 -
[53]
If you're reading this then you're doing the wrong thing. Quit EVE. GTFO. Give me you stuff and never come back. No jokes. |

Tarminic
Black Flame Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.10 14:47:00 -
[54]
Edited by: Tarminic on 10/07/2007 14:47:08
Originally by: Kindakrof If you're reading this then you're doing the wrong thing. Quit EVE. GTFO. Give me you stuff and never come back. No jokes.
Enjoy your visual depictions of nekkid ladies.  ------------ LAG - Hopefully teen-appropriate now. IBTL! IBDS/DC! IBTC! 1st in a BoB post! And other such forum tom-foolery. |
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CCP Eris Discordia

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Posted - 2007.07.10 16:06:00 -
[55]
Show interest in her hobbies and if she likes Desperate Housewives buy her that game, if she can connect to any game it will make it easier for her to understand why you like it. To avoid having her feel like she is the one to adapt also show a genuine interest in one of her hobbies you can participate in.
If she doesn¦t like Desperate Housewives try to find another game that might appeal to her, it¦s hard to predict really what kind of game women tend to like tbh. What works for some doesn¦t work on others..kinda reminds you of something else.
Anyway, goodluck and Voodoo¦s suggestion is a must too, it¦s not good if she forbids you to persue a hobby.
Pink Dread has been hijacked
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Father Weebles
Repo Industries
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Posted - 2007.07.10 23:11:00 -
[56]
Originally by: Pisi Mopsu OMG You sound like the male versio of me. Check out my bio in game sometime. LOL I don't think non-EVE players can really accept the level of addiction we experience... and sometimes even loved ones who play can't accept it.
Thats cool. Too bad 95% of gamer girls are obese.
"You leave anything for us?" "Just bodies." |

Hyper Drive
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Posted - 2007.07.11 00:04:00 -
[57]
Originally by: Patch86 Option 1: Get a girlfriend who isn't anally retentive about video games. Option 2: Make sure you only play in your FREE time, and not when she's after your attention. Option 3: Find something she spends an hour a day doing, and bring it up whenever she tries to yell. Option 4: Get her addicted to EVE (or another game) to level the playing field. Option 5: Eunuch. You know it makes sense.
There is also... Option X.
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KingsGambit
Caldari Knights
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Posted - 2007.07.11 00:08:00 -
[58]
Originally by: ElrondHubbard
Originally by: Tyrannosaurus Alan bought my gf an Xbox... it soon shut her up 
you beat her to death with the controller?
The controller is a little off balance, so you get a wobbly downswing. The Wii controller is much more solid, and while waving your arms like a loon playing Wii Sports anyway...accidents happen... -------------
My T2 Shop |

Avery Eclipsen
Minmatar 54th Knights Templar O X I D E
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Posted - 2007.07.11 00:25:00 -
[59]
my gf plays eve and so do my other 2 female roomates :D ___________________________________________
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Ruddnic
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Posted - 2007.07.11 08:02:00 -
[60]
Originally by: Hyper Drive
Originally by: Patch86 Option 1: Get a girlfriend who isn't anally retentive about video games. Option 2: Make sure you only play in your FREE time, and not when she's after your attention. Option 3: Find something she spends an hour a day doing, and bring it up whenever she tries to yell. Option 4: Get her addicted to EVE (or another game) to level the playing field. Option 5: Eunuch. You know it makes sense.
There is also... Option X.
Ha Ha Ha>>>>COUGH!! Maybe Not  Er.....SIGNATURE |

Ruddnic
|
Posted - 2007.07.11 08:04:00 -
[61]
Anyway we had a bit of a chat last night and it seems to be positive. She seemed ok with the suggestion that i play a limited amount of time each week and was quite responsive to my likening it with her soaps/womens tv stuff. BUT....i haven't logged on as yet and the proof will be in the pudding. Gonna try and get an hour online tonight so will have to see what the reaction is then Er.....SIGNATURE |

super canard
Gallente The Scope
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Posted - 2007.07.11 09:25:00 -
[62]
Originally by: Ruddnic ... .....this is what it was like 3 yrs ago....until i met a woman!!!! ...
pod her - sorted. -------------------------------------------------- No trees were killed in the sending of this message. However, a large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced. -------------------------------------------------- |

Gariuys
Evil Strangers Inc.
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Posted - 2007.07.11 13:21:00 -
[63]
1. Make sure she always comes first. 2. Make it clear, that playing games is a part of who you are. Gaming is a lifestyle, just like quite a few other hobbies. And that the fact that she doesn't understand isn't exactly relevant. It's your lifestyle. 3. If she doesn't believe 1, either because you don't show it, or she has issues. 2 will never ever work out. 4. Tell her that you will not change who you are for her. Although some minor changes are ofcourse possible. If a mayor overhaul of who you are is needed, she's in the wrong relationship, and more importantly so are you.
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Erim Solfara
Amarr House of Solfara
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Posted - 2007.07.11 13:47:00 -
[64]
Dump the *****.
Alternatively, get her a trial account under the pretence you want to spend more time with her and share one of your biggest interests/pastimes with her.
Do it right and she'll have to at least try the trial.
A new tool in the fight for balance? |

Jastra
Gallente Gallente Venture Inc Daikoku Trade Syndicate
|
Posted - 2007.07.11 21:25:00 -
[65]
Originally by: Ruddnic I love Eve, always have and if left alone in a room with my shiny pc and eve, can be stuck playing the game for hours on end.....
.....this is what it was like 3 yrs ago....until i met a woman!!!!
Eve playing continued and things were ok until she was getting a little bit jealous of my relationship with eve, arguments ensued and in the end the vile female one and my eve account was cancelled 
Anyway back to present day, i still have the eve bug and have started out again with a trial account, now i have managed to play about twice for a good few hours and have got the bug back so want to subscribe again but how do i run it passed the missus? How can i let her know that she comes first and eve comes a (very very close) 2nd? She doesnt believe me and hates/doesn't understand mmorpgs anyway.
I want to continue playing and would like to dedicate at least an hour a night to my beloved eve without my partner overeacting and thinking im having a love affair with my computer!!
Any help would be much appreciated!!
Moved from EVE General Discussion - Ductoris
Negotiate your play time and when you're not playing make sure she gets genuine attention (not just you in front of the TV) - even better if she watchs soaps then agree to play whilst shes watching them
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Lehraen Rawr
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Posted - 2007.07.12 02:44:00 -
[66]
grow a pair. a vag may be fun to play with, lord knows they're hard to turn down. but letting one control what you enjoy doing with your free time is disgusting.
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Shameless Avenger
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Posted - 2007.07.12 02:46:00 -
[67]
Originally by: Lehraen Rawr grow a pair. a vag may be fun to play with, lord knows they're hard to turn down. but letting one control what you enjoy doing with your free time is disgusting.
What free time?  |

Chainsaw Plankton
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Posted - 2007.07.12 05:33:00 -
[68]
she likes shiny objects like diamonds gold and shoes
you like eve
victory!
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ry ry
StateCorp
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Posted - 2007.07.12 15:41:00 -
[69]
Edited by: ry ry on 12/07/2007 15:42:34
i'm going to give the GF my 10 day WoW trial as soon as i've got the internet in the new house.
i don't want the vicious ***** anywhere near eve!
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Lithalnas
Amarr Hadean Drive Yards Archaean Cooperative
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Posted - 2007.07.12 19:04:00 -
[70]
Originally by: ry ry Edited by: ry ry on 12/07/2007 15:42:34
i'm going to give the GF my 10 day WoW trial as soon as i've got the internet in the new house.
i don't want the vicious ***** anywhere near eve!
that actually doesnt work, what will happen is she will give it to you and say "please level me up /puppy eyes" then you will be playing wow, and paying for her sub and have your own account because she wants to play with you. This is the complex bit, she wants to play with you but do it on her own.
I have seen it before ry ry, dont fall for it, resist the puppy eyes. ------------- Hadean Drive Yards The EvE inflation, 80 Macro miners, 1.5b isk/day |

Gift
Amarr Chaos Reborn
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Posted - 2007.07.12 20:19:00 -
[71]
Simple Solution, leave Eve. Problem Solved.
Pirates of Eve, Join channel "Pirate" Today!
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smashsmash
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Posted - 2007.07.12 21:26:00 -
[72]
i'd choose the mmorpg.
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Brujo Loco
Amarr Brujeria Teologica
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Posted - 2007.07.13 03:01:00 -
[73]
this might represent the future , take it at your own risk:
"Your dual $14.95 EVE account, perfectly strikes MARRIAGE, Wrecking for $1,400.00 monthly in Alimony!!!" - Unknown Quote
LOL
"The Theology Council is watching ... YOU!!!" Viva VENEZUELA!!! |
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