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Yama Epona
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
1
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Posted - 2015.05.06 20:19:42 -
[1] - Quote
Catastrophic Operations is a successful PvP corporation in LAWN Alliance.
We are looking for more PvP pilots to expand our ranks;
What we offer - Very active player base in EU/US timezones - Small gang to Coalition scale PvP - Highly experienced FC's - Upto 100% SRP on doctrine ships and 120% on Logi - Great PvE systems
You need to be - Very active on Eve and on Mumble - Able to fly T2 logi as a minimum - Have 30 mil SP or above (there is some flexibility for exceptional players) - A full API key in your application for all Eve online accounts.
We're also looking for industry pilots to help us build and grow our industrial team!
Although we're interested in all aspects of industry, our primary focus is mining and large-scale shipbuilding.
What we bring to industry - A very quiet dead-end pocket deep in null space - Almost 24x7 maximum Rorqual and Orca boosts - Frequent mining ops - Ore buy back program - Industry index 5 system with multiple ice belts - PI buy back program for corp-needed PI resources - Free PI skill books. command centers, and T1 industrial ship for those who harvest corp-needed PI resources - Great ratting next door if you need a break from mining - Lots of PvP if you need a break from mining and ratting - Jump freighter service available - we'll move your stuff down for free! - Willingness to participate in the occasional important CTAs (100% SRP for doctrine ships) - Friendly and helpful corp members
What you can bring - You like to shoot space rocks - You like to build big things - You're flexible and can shift industry focus as the corp needs change - Occasionally, you'll participate in corp logistics, such as refueling POSes - You understand the value of teamwork - You want to be part of something bigger than yourself
If you're interested, feel free to contact us in our in-game recruitment channel "CAT0P Public" or send me an eve mail.
Thanks.
~ Recruitment Officer ~ Catastrophic Operations ~ LAWN Alliance ~
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Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.07 20:40:26 -
[2] - Quote
Come join us :D |
Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.05.10 21:14:30 -
[3] - Quote
BUUUUMP, come shoot stuff with us!
I like beer.
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Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.05.12 23:25:07 -
[4] - Quote
Get on my level. Bump.
I like beer.
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Yama Epona
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
1
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Posted - 2015.05.13 20:13:54 -
[5] - Quote
We're having great fun in our new space - always something going on.....corp roams, alliance and coalition fleets.
Contact us in game to find out more!
~ Recruitment Officer ~ Catastrophic Operations ~ LAWN Alliance ~
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Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.05.14 17:16:19 -
[6] - Quote
Have some Bump-Sauce.
I like beer.
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Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.15 19:40:08 -
[7] - Quote
more bump-sauce |
Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.05.16 17:12:59 -
[8] - Quote
bumpalicious
I like beer.
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Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.17 17:58:49 -
[9] - Quote
fun times to be had come join us :D |
Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.18 21:32:44 -
[10] - Quote
bumpasarus |
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Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.05.19 01:48:23 -
[11] - Quote
damn you jimtom, stealing my thunder.
I like beer.
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Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.05.20 16:06:12 -
[12] - Quote
Bump.
I like beer.
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Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.21 16:29:15 -
[13] - Quote
Bumpster |
Heim Dal
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
0
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Posted - 2015.05.22 10:48:37 -
[14] - Quote
We want YOU to join Catastrophic Operations :) Don't hesitate and take a look in our pub channel 'CAT0P Public' |
Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.24 08:31:32 -
[15] - Quote
Come join our pub channel 'CAT0P Public' for a friendly chat |
Jimtom
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
25
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Posted - 2015.05.25 19:12:19 -
[16] - Quote
another bumpasarus |
Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
266
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Posted - 2015.05.26 17:10:33 -
[17] - Quote
New alliance, new space, still the same person posting, new opportunities to shoot stuff in the face
come talk to us.. time well spent
EU Pilots always welcome.
Alright, alright. My CEO has "reminded" me that US and AU tz Pilots are also welcome.
What do we offer?
Pain , turmoil, anguish, more pain.......
PVP... that's what I meant to say. PVP in all its infinite majesty and glory.
We have corp roams (drunk and sometimes sober) We have alliance fleets, both fun and uber serious We have other fleets ranging from small groups to hundreds of ships for specific purposes ranging from picking on poor lonely supercap and titan pilots, to ganking evil miners in their ships of mineral atrocity.
Did I mention the PVP? I did? why are you still reading then. Apply today. Avoid the ridicule of serving with lesser corporations.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
266
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Posted - 2015.05.27 10:53:37 -
[18] - Quote
Is this thing on? ok, can you hear me at the back? yes? right..
Catastrophic Operations
What is it we do exactly?
Well........
er........
We shoot stuff that's trying to shoot us
We shoot stuff that isn't trying to shoot us
We shoot stuff that's trying to shoot us even though we weren't trying to shoot them at the time (a rare occurrence but it has happened)
We help our friends shoot stuff
We shoot total strangers
We shoot "Stuff(tm)"
Win, lose or draw , we shoot stuff.
We do other things as well, but yeah mainly we just shoot stuff.
If YOU like shooting stuff ,enjoy interacting with your corpmates and can converse in more than monosyllabic grunts, then perhaps , just perhaps, we might be the corp for you.
Right any questions from the audience?
Yes , you at the back...
Seriously dude??? were you asleep during my talk? What do we do? You seriously want to know what we do?
Sigh
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Thomas Sajuuk
THE AESIR. Black Legion.
2
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Posted - 2015.05.27 11:58:41 -
[19] - Quote
I though you are cool corp....but since you joined goons I must delete you from my cool corp list lol. |
Tenaya Masai
7
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Posted - 2015.05.27 14:13:26 -
[20] - Quote
Regardless of which alliance they with. still the nicest corp out there.Always a good laugh with them.
My friendly bump |
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
268
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Posted - 2015.05.28 09:13:11 -
[21] - Quote
Tenaya Masai wrote:Regardless of which alliance they with. still the nicest corp out there.Always a good laugh with them.
My friendly bump
Kind words indeed
Right my little munchkins.
Another bump from the desk of the Marvellous Mithandra, recruiter for the fabulous people at Catastrophic Operations.
But wait Mithandra darling, I hear you say, are you or are you not part of LAWN, which in turn is part of the Imperium, which in turn is controlled by those daemonic, child eating deviants known as the Goons? Why yes, yes we are.
There there dear one, your seizure will pass, and to be honest? throwing holy water at me won't do anything but get me wet.
We are tucked up in Vale of the Silent, a little region we like to call home. What do we do here in our little "Pied a Eve" ?
There's the usual ISK making pastimes such as shooting red crosses, ravaging the roids, exploring, anoms, escalations, building and market trading. The thing is darlings, the IMPORTANT thing is shooting stuff is our raison d'etre, our Joie de vivre, our centre, our reason for waking up in the morning and NOT climbing a clocktower with a high powered rifle.
We adore the PvP. If it had a younger sister with loose morals and a penchant for miniskirts and 6 inch heels we still couldn't love it more than we already do.
Do YOU love the PVP? Do YOU agree that the only reason to take part in tthose other activities is to fund your next PVP ship? Do you dream darlings? Do you dream of seeing your name on a Titan or Super kill? Of carving your name in the annals of history as the greatest, blood thirstiest combat pilot known to the four races of old earths descendants?
If you do; if PvP gives you a tingle in your boy/girl parts, then Catastrophic Operations would love to hear from you.
Our specially trained counsellors are waiting to help you in channel "cat0p public"
Remember, you are special, come join people who understand that.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
268
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Posted - 2015.05.29 14:11:26 -
[22] - Quote
Lo there, do I see my CEO, Lo there, do I see my FC, my sisters and brothers, Lo there, do I see the line of my clones, back to the beginning, Lo, they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them, In the halls of Cat0ps where the brave may pew forever
The stars like icy pinpricks on the velvet cloth of night. calling out to me they offer vistas of inestimable delight.
Fiery gas clouds and nebulas; in my battered soul they ignite such a bright burning passion, that unfortunately I cannot recite.
look to the skies then my lady and understand why I compare thier transcendental beauty to the diamonds in your hair.
Lord Admiral Bavin D'Actaca The wooing of Lady Anathwien
Imperial Amarr Archives, Amarr Prime.
Now that I have your attention dear ones, let me get to the crux of the matter.
PVP. It's addictive; it's a drug that is hard to wean yourself off. Its cheaper than PCP and Crack, and what's more its legal.... well, mostly legal.
Going cold turkey? Not getting your fix? let Cat0ps hold your hand and mop your fevered brow. We have what you crave.
Come talk to us in Cat0ps Public and we'll hook you up.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
268
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Posted - 2015.05.30 14:04:35 -
[23] - Quote
Aright!!
Listen up you mouth breathers and farm boys.
Sure. You bulls eyed fedos in your Magnate back home, but I'm pretty sure those Fedos weren't strapped in to top of the line Caldari Merchandise, and i'm absolutely certain they didn't have cyno generators fitted to call in reinforcements at need.
So, what I'm trying to say here is, for those of you with linguistic and interpretational difficulties, is it doesn't matter how good you are as an individual Pilot. It doesn't matter how skilled you are. Unless you can mesh in properly with your team, you are undoubtedly a statistic waiting to happen, and the damned thing about that is, you'll probably drag your team down with you into oblivion.
Its a harsh Universe out there Ladies and Gentlemen. Harsh, brutal and unforgiving. Your training here will be harsh, brutal, and your team leaders will be unforgiving. We do not do this because we hate you, though I will admit to mildly disliking each and every scum sucking pond dwelling organism standing in front of me today, each daring to believe that they have what it takes to join my beloved corp. We do it to ensure that when you do screw up and die, it won't because we didn't do our best for you, that WE didn't prepare you for your future in the corp, however brief it might be.
Mesh with your team mates, listen to your FC's, pay attention to your scanners, learn from your mistakes, for as sure as the god of wormholers is called BoB, you will make mistakes.
You will not always win. While you are thinking of ways to destroy your foe, said foe is doing his or her level best to think of ways to ensure your demise. The best laid plans can unravel in a heart beat. Accept that. You will not always win.
That doesn't mean you don't have to try.
Orientation speech to recruits Saila VII Moon 14 Caldari Navy Commander Reg Dalon Senior Instructor Exerpt declassified and released by request
As the good Commander said my little love puppets, we here at Catastrophic Operations value team work. Most activities involving human beings turn out to be much more fun in groups, and a few of the more interesting activities are heavenly with the right partner or partners.
On your own, you will either die, or possibly go blind, if the old wives tales are to be believed. We offer structure and chaos in equal measure, so our dream recruit must be skilled; we prefer 30mill sp or more, but for the right skill set we'll settle for less. Our dream recruit must also be able to follow a plan, and be able to improvise when all hell breaks loose. Our dream recruit must be able to discuss the merits of pegging as a tool for social and interpersonal bonding. Our dream recruit must not be a total asshat; semi-asshattery is acceptable, but complete asshattery is most definitely not. Finally, our dream recruit must be able to use mumble and be in channel whenever they are on line.
Do you think you have what it takes to be a Member of Catastrophic Operations? are you active? and by that dears I don't mean sexually active. Are you EU or US? (though other Tz are also welcome) Can you hold a conversation that isn't one sided and all in your head? If the answer is yes then please, come join us in channel "cat0p public" for a chat. Who knows, we may rock your world.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
268
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Posted - 2015.05.31 10:20:55 -
[24] - Quote
Why hello there again my PvPcentric love puppets.
Welcome to another session of Q and A with moi, Mithandra. Pull up a Louisiana lounger and we'll get right to "da bidniss"
Comfy?
Then I shall begin..
Q Mithandra are you indeed as magnificent as you claim
A. Why yes dears, yes I am. I am a legend in my own headspace.
Q. I am an industrialist. Is there room in your heart for me?
A. Of course there is you poor poor pilot you. A few sessions on my couch should cure you of your industrialists droop. Soon you will indeed be a rampant , red blooded, nail chewing testosterone/oestrogen drenched powerhouse of PvP debauchery. If you want to be the eve equivalent of a cross dresser in fleet downtimes you can do it. Just be prepared for the gentle hazing.
Q. I am curious. What is this pegging thing of which you speak?
A. It is the preferred Cat0ps disciplinary procedure for naughty Pilots. It would appear that we have a LOT of naughty repeat offender Pilots.
Q. I am not very good at PVP. Can you help.
A. I would love to help you with your "performance" issues however I am kept busy being magnificent. We have Pilots in the Corp more than willing to help you reach PVPgasm. They will teach you, tease you, torment and pleasure you with their PVP karma sutra skills. You will be taken beyond the limits of pleasure into new realms of experience that you will in future crave like the very air you breathe.
Q. Where do you live? I'd like to check out the neighbourhood, see where the shopping centres are, amenities etc
A. We my darlings live in a little piece of eve known as the Vale of the Silent. I can only assume it was named thusly as an Ironic homage, for daily the peels of joyful laughter ring across the region. Laughter and other sounds usually uttered behind closed doors, in private with a close friend or three. Promiscuous PvP is de rigour here in the Vale. We'll do it any time, anywhere, and with anyone. We live in the modern age Eden, and life is good.
Q. I'm a stay at home single Mom/Modern Dad and don't get out much. What do you have to offer me?
A. Oh you poor dears. Of course we have something to offer you. We enjoy lengthy chats on mumble, long roams in ships that might almost have been designed for an Ann Summers catalogue, and we have private "rooms" where you can spend an anonymous hour or three with a partner or partners of your choice.
Q. How do you fund your PVPfetish?
A. Oh my, I'm all tingly. There are SO many ways and I personally love them all. I'll try anything once, and if I like it or its frowned upon in more than one region of space, I'll try it more than once. I'm in Catastrophic Operations, Not the Virgin Brides of Christ. Its all about the tingle. In Catops, we get good tingle.
Well that's all I have time for my dear ones. If you want to know more about Catastrophic Operations there are several methods
1. Join Channel "Cat0p Public" for a chat 2. Post your questions here in our recruitment love channel 3. Contact either myself or another recruiter. We will treat your notes as confidential.
Toodles
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Capt Handbanana
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
23
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Posted - 2015.06.01 05:34:00 -
[25] - Quote
Im not going to write an essay like my dear friend Mithandra, but heres a sweet little love bump.
I like beer.
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
272
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Posted - 2015.06.02 09:14:01 -
[26] - Quote
Ok time for a maths and art lesson.
HEY where are you going. Get back here.
They say a picture paints a thousand words therefore (picture = 1000 words)
Now in maths you can reverse an equation, therefore (1000 words = picture)
I see the math I hear you say, what the hell does that have to do with pictures.
Well, pictures allow us to view our surroundings, events, situations, emotions. They convey ideas.
Now, stay with me. Its brain stretching time..
If I want to paint a picture of catastrophic operations I would do so best in the minimalist style
Minimalists distanced themselves from the Abstract Expressionists by removing suggestions of biography from their art or, indeed, metaphors of any kind. This denial of expression coupled with an interest in making objects that avoided the appearance of fine art led to the creation of sleek, geometric works that purposefully and radically eschew conventional aesthetic appeal.
now based on the above premise (minimalism=(words/100))
Which means to paint a picture of Catastrophic Operations in the minimalist style I only need 10 words.
We do the pew and eschew the jew. Join us.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
282
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Posted - 2015.06.03 00:47:31 -
[27] - Quote
Is it not enough that I stand and fight? With my back towards tomorrows light Is it still not enough that I give my all? and fight with valour, until spent, I fall Is my duty and honour of so little worth? that my grave consists of paupers earth
Will you care for the ones I left behind? or will you instead, pay them no mind Will you honour your fine oaths to me? as I honoured mine to keep you free Will you with your life, honour my death? as I held to my oaths till my dying breath
The Soldiers lament Author unknown Thought to date back to earths final diaspora, before the collapse of the new eden wormhole
Come join Catastrophic Operations. You may not know you want to , but trust me, you really do.
Contact me in game, by convo or evemail. Mithandra.
Join our public channel cat0p public
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
282
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Posted - 2015.06.04 12:38:53 -
[28] - Quote
So.
Eve. What is it?
Eve is a Socioeconomic and political experiment designed by the Icelandic board of psychiatry in conjunction with the chamber of commerce, and Icelandic political parties. Its main goal is to answer an age old question. What happens when you let the lunatics run the asylum.
If you let 30,000 (rough estimate of subscriptions on line at any one time) sociopaths loose in an environment that condones their behaviour, what social structures will emerge? What becomes the new norm? If it IS the new norm, can it still be considered divergent or aberrant behaviour? How will markets develop in this new social reality and what political system(s) will emerge?
Sociopathic behaviour is a broad brush term that covers many recognised personality disorders. Breathe easily my lovers, I'm not going to go in to any great depth on the subject. I'll just pick and choose a few to put my point across.
Paranoid personality disorder Cluster A
A person with a paranoid personality disorder is extremely distrustful and suspicious. Other features include:
GÇóthinking other people are lying to them or trying to manipulate them GÇófeeling they cannot really trust their friends and associates GÇóworrying that any confidential information shared with others will be used against them GÇóthinking there are hidden meanings in remarks most would regard as innocent
My personal favourite and one I can relate too. In Eve its actually emerged that people with this particular disorder make pretty good CEO's, because their corporations rarely if ever suffer from espionage or theft. So, if a disorder becomes a survival trait can it still be considered a disorder?
Antisocial personality disorder Cluster B
A person with an antisocial personality disorder sees other people as vulnerable and may intimidate or bully others without remorse. They lack concern about the consequences of their actions.
Symptoms include:
GÇólack of concern, regret or remorse about other people's distress GÇóirresponsibility and disregard for normal social behaviour GÇólittle ability to tolerate frustration and to control their anger GÇólack of guilt, or not learning from their mistakes
Can you say HIsec ganking corp, gatecampers and griefers? You have all experienced this, or have indeed been the perpetrator. Tears are the currency this type of personality craves.
Dependent personality disorder Cluster C
A person with dependent personality disorder feels they have no ability to be independent. They may show an excessive need for others to look after them and are "clingy". Other features include:
GÇófinding it difficult to make decisions without other peopleGÇÖs guidance GÇóneeding others to take responsibility over what should be their own important life choices GÇófinding it difficult to start new activities due to a lack of confidence
I can see a lot of CEOs out there going "god damn that sounds like half my corp, bitching on about nothing to do, but not going out to create content themselves"
As I can see you switching from personality disorder to attention deficit disorder I'll finish this monologue with tthree points.
There are more personality disorders in Eve than the three I've mentioned (one from each cluster type).
Even though the study is ongoing, it has shown that just like oil and water, if you mix several different types of personality in a closed system, they will separate out into distinct groupings. Those groupings don't always react well together.
Its probably safer for society that most of us are locked away in our rooms giving EVE our time rather than being allowed to interact with the general population.
I have been the Marvellous Mithandra and I've probably just set psychiatry back a hundred years.
Now. JOIN CATASTROPHIC OPERATIONS please.
Until you do, I have to spend my time in the recruitment channel, which is like EVE distilled down to its most quintessential essence of nastiness ever. Even the U.N is considering branding the recruitment channel as cruel and unusual torture.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
289
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Posted - 2015.06.05 00:30:07 -
[29] - Quote
Why hello my little pew pew munchkins.
After a week of being marvellous, Catastrophic Operations has inducted a whole colony of eager beavers, all itching to get thier pew on.
Now now darlings, don't cry. We still have room for some more special snowflakes.
I shall spare you all from another Marvellous Mithandra Monologue. My CEO wants me to "stick to the recruiting facts Ma'am."
We are indeed looking for more pilots interested In the Pew, however we are also looking for an EU tz Industrial Power House. Someone to gather up the rains of an ad-hoc military-Industrial machine and turn it to the Corporations Advantage, producing "stuff" to shoot at other pilots or to get blown up in.
We already have an awesome captain of industry for the US tz, but bless his little cotton socks, he can't be on twenty four hours a day. He has to sleep sometime. Advanced age is creeping up on him, so we want to lighten his load wherever possible.
What skills will a potential candidate require? Well my hopeful little monopoly boot, if you have to ask the question then you are probably not the Industrial Power House you think you are.
If you are interested in the position of EU Industry Manager, please contact either:-
Mithandra Yama Epona Spacetart
We look forward to bringing the successful candidate into the Catastrophic Operations family. Might that be you?
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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Mithandra
Catastrophic Operations Get Off My Lawn
289
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Posted - 2015.06.06 06:17:16 -
[30] - Quote
Catastrophic Operations Lawn Alliance Imperium PVP
If you managed to read all the way through that then well done. It's quite possible that there is a place for you in our Corporation.
Eve is the dark haired, totally hot emo gothchild of the gaming community
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