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Chance Card and Help from the Community

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Author	Thread Statistics \| Show CCP posts - 5 post(s)
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:02:00 - [1] Ok.. I have a feeling this is going to get messy but I need some intelligent help from the community. I am currently working on a something called Podo, which is in the final stage, concentrating on the sillier aspects of Eve. When finished I hope to release it to all So here what I need help on. There are chance cards, and I want these to reflect eve. To give you an idea of the things I am looking, below is the list of some of the ones I already have. I have lots but need more... many more... please help. Thxs Examples : You fall asleep at the keyboard and wake up in a pod The Damsel in distress falls in love with Krull and wont leave CCP nerf Janitors Your Exotic dancers all fall pregnant resulting in lots of baby janitors You are mention on Warpdrive active after Urban Mongral undocks by accident and you kill him. After several hours of mining your mind snaps and the roids attack you. Hug a Carebear, Kill a pirate, squish a Rat, and tickle a dev. Make Eve fun....
Tamia Clant New Dawn Corp New Eden Research	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:17:00 - [2] Am I the only one who has no clue what the OP is talking about?
Lucille Austero	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:19:00 - [3] seems like he's creating a monopoly type game based on eve. and needs ideas for the "chance" cards you would draw.

CCP Navigator C C P	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:24:00 - [4] You undock from Jita 4-4 in an ibis with 3 bil in Faction/Officer mods. You have a welp day

Faife Blackrain Solutions Twilight Trade Cartel	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:27:00 - [5] if you're making an eve monopoly clone, then this is a brilliant idea. "Ha ha! I have a monopoly on stain AND 3 PoSes on that square. 1.2bilion isk to me"
Fifth Horseman	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:27:00 - [6] You were warned to set a long skill training, miss a turn while you whine on the forum.
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:28:00 - [7] Originally by: Lucille Austero seems like he's creating a monopoly type game based on eve. and needs ideas for the "chance" cards you would draw. Yep that is right Lucille. Its more like game of life then monopoly, but I got some Friends to try out first draft and it works... sort of.. but need more humour. Hence the forums
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:32:00 - [8] Originally by: Faife if you're making an eve monopoly clone, then this is a brilliant idea. "Ha ha! I have a monopoly on stain AND 3 PoSes on that square. 1.2bilion isk to me" As above not with Pod-oh!.. but you give me a idea for the next one... It will happen. I promise he he
Estel Arador Minmatar AFK	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:32:00 - [9] You trash an implant while trying to plug it in.
Tarminic Forsaken Resistance The Last Stand	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:34:00 - [10] Quote: You accidentally hit the wrong F key while attempting to repair a friend. Say Hello to CONCORD! Quote: It turns out that guy you smacktalked in local really IS a BoB alt! Quote: You undock into a low-sec pirate war. It turns out shuttles can't tank very well. Quote: That's a templar, an Amarr Fighter. It's also the last thing your crew will ever see. Quote: Forget to check the contents of that mineral contract. You've just purchased one unite of Tritanium for the price of one million! Quote: That can labeled "Free Ammo" over there? It wasn't.
Faife Blackrain Solutions Twilight Trade Cartel	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:34:00 - [11] You can flip a battle badger. Spend a turn scrammed and webbed. You went to Jita, lose a turn. You find a T2 Quafe BPO. You make 500 million before CCP shuts you down.
Dyvim Slorm BladeRunners INC	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:34:00 - [12] Go straight to Jita, Do not pass Go. Do not collect 200! You'll also need the "Get Out of Jita Free" card
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:35:00 - [13] Originally by: CCP Navigator You undock from Jita 4-4 in an ibis with 3 bil in Faction/Officer mods. You have a welp day lol love it
Roy Batty68 Caldari Immortal Dead	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:51:00 - [14] - You inherited some isk from Uncle Iskseller. Wallet set to negative eleventy billion. - Suicide Gankers pop a faction mod hauling shuttle right in front of you. You gain 1 Chelm's Waffle Iron (or whatever) - Your friend quits and leaves you all his nano'd ships. +3 to next 3 rolls. - The forum mods did not find your 5000 consecutive posts in the thread, "Threadnaught? What threadnaught?" to be amusing. At all. Go straight to jail. - Scam successful! You've made off with 2 carriers, 13 large towers, 3 jump freighters, and a sexy new minmatar shuttle! Inherit eleventy billion isk. - Rapier decloaks and double webs you. -3 on next three rolls. - Take a ride on the Interbus. Advance to Rens Avenue and collect 200 Isk! - Busted! Teh Goonies saw through your alt spying plan and are now dry humping the mining ships of everyone you know. Spend next 3 turns on the forums.
Faife Blackrain Solutions Twilight Trade Cartel	Posted - 2008.04.17 16:54:00 - [15] Corp thief! Lose your PoS! War decced by a blackmail corp. Pay 400m or lose a turn docked. You scan down a Kernite belt in hi sec, roll again. Gistii Ambusher dropped a Domination Invulnerability Field. Roll again.
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.17 19:13:00 - [16] Excellent suggests. My favourite one so far is "It turns out that guy you smacktalked in local really IS a BoB alt!" Keep them coming
Danny Ackbar Gallente Dirty Deeds Corp. Axiom Empire	Posted - 2008.04.17 19:37:00 - [17] Warped off without your Drones. Go back 2 spaces You stop to read CAOD. All other players advance 3 spaces while you cry in despair You fight of the gatecamp with your "Honour Tank" lose 2 turns

CCP WeatherMan C C P	Posted - 2008.04.17 19:46:00 - [18] -You are charged of 1 bil by CSPA for occupying the GMs' secret hotline! Thank you for your contribution to the Polaris spa system. -Stop aside! You are speeding with that rigged nano engine. Buy our officer freighter disguise or you'll be subjected to an extended downtime for the next nerf patch. -Congratulations! You are awarded another reimbursement petition slot for surviving with only 1% structure left from the 5268974125639th lagfest. Lucky you!

Lord Flatulence Caldari Spack Lords	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:02:00 - [19] SQL error in your favour - collect 100mil ISK
An Anarchyyt Gallente Battlestars GoonSwarm	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:05:00 - [20] Originally by: CCP WeatherMan -You are charged of 1 bil by CSPA for occupying the GMs' secret hotline! Thank you for your contribution to the Polaris spa system. -Stop aside! You are speeding with that rigged nano engine. Buy our officer freighter disguise or you'll be subjected to an extended downtime for the next nerf patch. -Congratulations! You are awarded another reimbursement petition slot for surviving with only 1% structure left from the 5268974125639th lagfest. Lucky you! Who are you? Are you the new Prism X?
Tchell Dahhn Amarr Deny Reality	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:09:00 - [21] "Go directly to Rancer. Do not keep your ship or pod. Do not collect insurance." The Tchell Dahhn Manifesto
Shadow Joy	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:11:00 - [22] The six pack of beer you drank waits until you are engaged in combat to ask to be let out. Forgot to check the contact. What you thought was a Navy Raven is a standard Raven. Forgot to check the map. That courier mission requires 4 low sec jumps.
Tchell Dahhn Amarr Deny Reality	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:11:00 - [23] "Advance ship to the nearest asteroid belt. If unmined you may mine it from 11km. If Veldspar, throw dice and pay Chribba a total ten times the amount thrown." The Tchell Dahhn Manifesto
Patch86 Di-Tron Heavy Industries Atlas Alliance	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:15:00 - [24] Originally by: An Anarchyyt Originally by: CCP WeatherMan -You are charged of 1 bil by CSPA for occupying the GMs' secret hotline! Thank you for your contribution to the Polaris spa system. -Stop aside! You are speeding with that rigged nano engine. Buy our officer freighter disguise or you'll be subjected to an extended downtime for the next nerf patch. -Congratulations! You are awarded another reimbursement petition slot for surviving with only 1% structure left from the 5268974125639th lagfest. Lucky you! Who are you? Are you the new Prism X? What happened to the old Prism X? ------ Originally by: Dark Shikari The problem with killing Jesus is he always just respawns 3 days later anyways.
Goumindong Amarr Merch Industrial GoonSwarm	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:18:00 - [25] Originally by: Lord Flatulence SQL error in your favour - collect 100mil ISK Brilliant.
An Anarchyyt Gallente Battlestars GoonSwarm	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:19:00 - [26] Originally by: Patch86 What happened to the old Prism X? He died when I found out he wasn't actually a woman.

CCP Prism X C C P	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:19:00 - [27] Why do I need to be replaced? And believe me, the only thing you get from SQL errors are node deaths and an excessively agitated Prism X on the forums.

Kazuo Ishiguro House of Marbles Zzz	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:24:00 - [28] I suggest people add some of the 'session change in progress' variants...
Tchell Dahhn Amarr Deny Reality	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:31:00 - [29] "You are unable to warp because you are warp scrambled. Go back three spaces."
Arous Drephius Caldari Caldari Provisions	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:33:00 - [30] Spend a turn breaking Scotty's nose for not letting you change ship.
An Anarchyyt Gallente Battlestars GoonSwarm	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:38:00 - [31] Originally by: CCP Prism X Why do I need to be replaced? Ever read Logan's Run?
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:38:00 - [32] Edited by: Brigitte Helm on 17/04/2008 20:43:18 Originally by: Arous Drephius Spend a turn breaking Scotty's nose for not letting you change ship. My new fav... thxs Arous Meant to add... as well as all the bad ones... I really need some good news ones
Orchid Ix Behind The Stars	Posted - 2008.04.17 20:40:00 - [33] Session change in progress... lose a turn.
Roy Batty68 Caldari Immortal Dead	Posted - 2008.04.17 21:05:00 - [34] Lose a turn theme: - You can't do that to a planet. Lose a turn. - The Tritanium Alloy Dice are already SortOfRandomNumberGenerating. Lose a turn for being impatient. - We're Sorry, Something Happened... Press F5 and lose a turn. - You can't activate this Chance Card while in warp. Lose a turn. - It would make more sense to talk to yourself directly rather than through this Chance Card. Lose a turn. - You may not assemble this Chance Card as this action is reserved only for Chance Cards. Lose a turn. - This Chance Card is starting up in 5.. 4.. 3.. 2.. 1.. This Chance Card is starting up in 5.. 4.. 3.. 2.. 1.. This Chance Card is starting up in 5.. 4.. 3.. 2.. 1.. Lose so many turns you might as well go do something else. Sig removed, inappropriate content. If you would like further details please mail [email protected] ~Saint
Lord Flatulence Caldari Spack Lords	Posted - 2008.04.17 21:08:00 - [35] Those Chance Cards are not stackable - lose a turn
Patch86 Di-Tron Heavy Industries Atlas Alliance	Posted - 2008.04.17 21:10:00 - [36] Originally by: Lord Flatulence Those Chance Cards are not stackable - lose a turn ------ Originally by: Dark Shikari The problem with killing Jesus is he always just respawns 3 days later anyways.

CCP Prism X C C P	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:09:00 - [37] ~ You imply a Dev is a fossil, on the forums. Lose the game. ~ Prism X EvE Database Developer Relocating your character to a cozy, secure container since 2006

Jenny Spitfire Caldari LoneStar Industries Veritas Immortalis	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:11:00 - [38] Kongrasulation, yuo are Jenny Spitfire. --------- Technica impendi Caldari generis. Pax Caldaria! Recruitment -KB-
Rana Ash Minmatar Aeon Trinity	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:15:00 - [39] You make a killing on the market collect x number of isk The salvage was awsome collect x ammount All the shuttels you made earnd you a nice ammount of isk collect... Investing in jitas market paid off, collect x ammount of isk ¦on Trinity is recruting, inquire within for details lyret dedreen
Alty MacAlterson Alt Corporation	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:21:00 - [40] Edited by: Alty MacAlterson on 17/04/2008 22:21:30 Hulks don't tank very well against a hundred Velators. You fall asleep while ratting in your Navythron and wake up in an Ibis. Patch day! Lose 10 turns.
Elles D Caldari The Black Rabbits The Gurlstas Associates	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:22:00 - [41] The alt key broke, lose a turn whilst you enter a state of deep psychosis which results in a failure cascade. Please resize image to a maximum of 400 x 120, not exceeding 24000 bytes. If you would like further details please mail [email protected] ~Saint
Lord Flatulence Caldari Spack Lords	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:46:00 - [42] You disguise your old Quafe cans as Cap Booster 800s and contract them in Jita - collect 200mil ISK.
Neddy Fox Hadean Drive Yards	Posted - 2008.04.17 22:59:00 - [43] You remote repped a rat, you loose 100 mill. 67.000.000 is not 67k, you loose 67 mill You looted a wreck in lowsec and got away with it, you win 50 mill You succesfully tanked a GS suicide, after looting his wreck you got a 100 mill reward.
Tommy TenKreds Animal Mercantile Executive	Posted - 2008.04.17 23:36:00 - [44] - Negatives - * The client crashed and you are now 99th in the queue for login... * Overheating your warp core stabilizers was a bad idea... * You clone jump to your current station, destroying your Snake implant clone... - Positives - * You corner the Expanded Cargohold II market... * Your probe has located a wormhole to the Jove regions... * You discover an Opux Luxury Yacht on contract for 1 ISK...
Dealth Striker Caldari Striker Ltd	Posted - 2008.04.18 00:05:00 - [45] - Warp to 0 in lowsec is actually a roll of DND dice - oops you rolled 01 - you fail - you stop 15km from stargate. - you attempt to jump on warp 0 to destination and msg pops up 'you have to been with 2.5 km to jump - you have 2 more attempt.. use them wisely or you have to wait 5 minutes to use jump again' - you jump into Jita.. msg pops up 'Maybe it is a good time to do those house chores now' - you are in a massive battle and the game starts grinding to a very slow crawl, msg pops up.. 'we are experiencing technical difficulties but that is nothing compared to what your ship is currently experiencing. Don't look caz you are not going to like what you see. - your enemy just asked to fleet join you.. you cannot stargate jump in lowsec for a minute - your ship is blown up.. msg pops up: You paid $$$isk for the ship You paid $$$isk for the modules that were blown to bits Your cargo destroyed you paid $$$isk and is worth $$$isk Your modules that survived the destruction has netted that winner person $$$isk Your cargo that survived the destruction has netted the lucky scooper $$$isk Lag was thrown in for free Total cost to you and time spent with this ship $$$$$isk Experience of becoming broke once again - priceless - been Concorded for the 3rd time this week - insurance revoked! - your lucky day.. that 1.5 billion isk BPO contract is actually on sale since the contract owner accidently put it in for .15 billion isk - the pirate actually lets you go after you pay the ransom - you accidently click on the yes button to the msg 'this is a dangerous act do you really want to do this?' and a 2nd msg comes up 'are you really really sure you want to lose that expensive ship on such an obvious stupid move?' --------------------- Communication is Key!
An Anarchyyt Gallente Battlestars GoonSwarm	Posted - 2008.04.18 00:46:00 - [46] Originally by: CCP Prism X ~ You imply a Dev is a fossil, on the forums. Lose the game. :cripes:
Nomakai Delateriel Amarr Viziam	Posted - 2008.04.18 01:10:00 - [47] "Due to a 'Target is invulnerable' message your target managed to avoid your gatecamp. To vent your range you spend your next turn popping MACRO haulers. Skip your next turn and collect 500 tritanium" "Your voice server is being ventrilo harassed. Miss your next fleet op. On the upside, apparently someone in your alliance has 'balls of steel'"
Neth'Rae Gallente Neth's Workshop	Posted - 2008.04.18 01:44:00 - [48] Edited by: Neth''Rae on 18/04/2008 01:44:36 If CCP Released an Official EVE Monopoly I'd buy it instantly! And hey, you've already had success with board games before!!
Thargat Caldari North Star Networks Triumvirate.	Posted - 2008.04.18 02:36:00 - [49] Negs: - CONCORDOKKEN (You accedently pop a can during a mission, -200mil) - ET PWNS HOME? (Your homesystem is DDd by ET, you spend one round cleaning the mess up) - OHGOD BEES (you're blessed with a velator "inconvenience OP", you lose your ship and need to spend a round looking for your dignity) - Desynched (your're actually not where you think you are, move back 1D) Positives: - Can I have your stuffz? (It actually works this time, +1bil ISK) - Can't take the heat? (a nanomach burns his midrack due to lag as he tries to gank your domi, you gain a random officer module) - Blue on Blue? (A hostile gang crashes the gatecamp you just got stuck in and you escape as local is filled with diplomatical lamentation, this card negates "warpscrambled" card) - Gankaton (go to denmark for one round and then spend one additional round sobering up) Neut: - This is Moon (nothing happens) - Extended DT (nothing happens, all players must wait 1 turn)
Detritus Thermopyle Minmatar	Posted - 2008.04.18 03:27:00 - [50] Your 'loss due to lag' petition generates an 'our logs show something' response from a GM, collect xxx isk and take an extra turn. Your 'loss due to lag' petition generates an 'our logs show nothing' response from a GM, lose 2 turns while complaining on the forums. A lie can travel halfway around the universe while the truth is un-docking. ~ Mark Twain (paraphrased)

CCP WeatherMan C C P	Posted - 2008.04.18 03:34:00 - [51] Drank too much beer and mistook your war targets for the Red Cross rescue team. Now meet the real nurse and choose a new clone! WeatherMan Community Representative EVE Online, CCP Games Email/Netfang

Amastat Caldari Omegatech	Posted - 2008.04.18 03:59:00 - [52] You made a inappropriate forum signature, CCP Navigater beats the crap out of your signature with the nerf bat. (lose 2,000,000 ISK) Your Tempest breaks down and you are forced to peruse an Amarrian rental service. CCP beats you with the nerf tree. (lose 5,000,000 ISK) It's patch day! Your formally worthless trade stock has now quadrupled in value. (gain 5,000,000 ISK) Uh-oh! A quantum singularity appears and you are sucked into Jita! (you lose a turn)
Jurgen Cartis Caldari Interstellar Corporation of Exploration Nex Eternus	Posted - 2008.04.18 04:17:00 - [53] Character Sold for ISK. Go back to Start, collect ten billion ISK. You jumped to your old EC-P8R jumpclone. Turns out TRI is better at station camps than the last guys who tried. Lose 2 turns waiting them out. Go to M-0EEB in an Osprey to ninja mine. Welcome back to the clone vats. Falcon Alt Uncloaks. Negate one negative chance card (it may not be redirected). Newbie Scout Alt. Avoid one negative chance card (it may be redirected). Suicide Gank. Steal three hundred million ISK from one player of your choice. CONCORD lags out his square for the next turn, anyone who goes through it loses 2 squares of movement. Log into Jita on Sunday. Lose 1 turn waiting for the GM to move you. You fall asleep at the keyboard, and your alliance mates spend the next 5 hours guarding your Dreadnought. Spend next 2 turns bashing POS to make up the favor to them. Call in a few favors. Draw another chance card. Ransomed by pirates. Lose 50 million ISK. Ransomed by pirates. Lose 50 million ISK, and your ship. You fail to read the patch notes. Lose one turn wondering why your favorite ship won't undock. You find a stealth buff/nerf on SISI. Make 20% of your current ISK stockpile speculating. Stumble into CAOD. Spend 20m on brain bleach. Forum ***** a little too hard. Turned pink for 3 turns. Goonfleet causes a Node Crash. Everyone within 10 spaces of your position on the board loses 1 turn. Exploration pays off big time. You make 2 billion ISK. Go on a Goonfleet slosh op. Spend next turn getting over hangover and piecing together how you ended up in Venal in an Auguror. AFK Cloaker! You can ignore him and move again, or lose 2 spaces movement avoiding the system. AFK Cloaker isn't AFK. Played in response to ignoring AFK Cloaker. Opponent loses 1 turn/ship. Hauler Spawn! Gain 200 million ISK, but lose a turn hauling it. Newbie piwat attacks you in a belt. Lose 1 turn laughing at his horrendous Thorax fit. It turns out Mallers are known as Bait-class for a reason. Lose one ship. You get to be the Forlorn Hope and draw fire on a POS warp in. Lose your current ship. Trolled on the forums. Lose one turn in flamewar before mods lock the thread. Fit a BS Microwarpdrive on your HAC. Go forward as far as you can, in a straight line, then spend 1 turn stopping and getting your cap back up. -------------------- ICE Blueprint Sales FIRST!! -Yipsilanti Pfft. Never such a thing as a "last chance". ;) -Rauth
Cors It's A Trap	Posted - 2008.04.18 04:19:00 - [54] You you tried to flip a can with Tritanium in it from some guy with an odd name. He comes back in the Veldnaught equiped with 3 target painters, a web and a Scram. You think his name was something ending in "ibba"
SeismicForce The Shadow Order SMASH Alliance	Posted - 2008.04.18 06:42:00 - [55] - You were caught mining in a Procurer, go back 10 spaces - Your vagabond only had 1 nano mounted, lose 50% of your next throw - You were caught flying an Amarr ship, pay 100 million
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.04.18 13:34:00 - [56] Originally by: CCP WeatherMan Drank too much beer and mistook your war targets for the Red Cross rescue team. Now meet the real nurse and choose a new clone! He He me like... Thxs Guys these are all great... keep them coming the more I get the better.
Tommy TenKreds Animal Mercantile Executive	Posted - 2008.04.18 14:16:00 - [57] Originally by: Detritus Thermopyle Your 'loss due to lag' petition generates an 'our logs show nothing' response from a GM, lose 2 turns while complaining on the forums.
Mikal Drey Minmatar ORIGIN SYSTEMS Atlas Alliance	Posted - 2008.04.18 14:28:00 - [58] "You undock for a fleet fight, travel several systems . . . forget to put ammo in your cargo bay." same with freighter . "You undock your freighter for a trade haul, go afk. forget cargo :''(" "Your 1.0 exploration plex escalates serveral systems and ends up in a camped .4. you ninja past and the final waypoint to get rewarded with a Faction NPC Frigate" All the above actually happened :)
Sexiest Beast Caldari State War Academy	Posted - 2008.04.18 14:35:00 - [59] boot.ini not found. Go directly to NOL and do not pass Jita
Shanur Minmatar Republic Military School	Posted - 2008.04.18 14:37:00 - [60] Originally by: Detritus Thermopyle Your 'loss due to lag' petition generates an 'our logs show something' response from a GM, collect xxx isk and take an extra turn. Lose your beer as the GM drank it. Fixed Originally by: Malcanis Too many people confuse "Waah, I didn't get my own way" with 'poor customer service'.
Brigitte Helm Minmatar Flying Fox Industries	Posted - 2008.05.07 20:15:00 - [61] After discussion with the relevant people, I have been informed that I am unable to release this to the community. Once again thank you for you suggestions. Hug a Carebear, Kill a pirate, squish a Rat, and tickle a dev. Make Eve fun....
Kazuo Ishiguro House of Marbles Zzz	Posted - 2008.05.07 21:14:00 - [62] Under what terms and in what form were you originally planning to release it? Surely there's some sort of possible compromise? My research services Spreadsheets: Top speed calculation - Halo Implant stats
Khandara Seraphim StarHunt Fallout Project	Posted - 2008.05.07 21:20:00 - [63] -You installed Trinity on your windows XP partition. Set the board on fire and run out of the room screaming.
bio damage	Posted - 2008.05.07 21:23:00 - [64] i was thinking as i read through this topic of a great card You infringe the copy write of a trade marked game. you get sued by ccp

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