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Aleria Angelis
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Posted - 2006.01.24 21:57:00 -
[1]
*Aleria Angelis's smiling face flickers onto the screen as she eagerly awaits to present The Summit with her latest findings*
Today the Scope received the results from its most recent survey into the visual trends of the empires pod-pilots.
The report showed an alarming increase in what some people would term "Ugliness" outside the Federation.
In response to these findings The Scope has launched a
project of a charitable nature, aimed at helping aesthetically chalenged pod-pilots.
Unsurprisingly the area which we found most transgressions against fashion were of course within the Caldari State. Here we were spoilt for choice! Our first volunteer was Mr Bruno Maffias, and as you can see from the image below, he was in desperate need of our help:
Before Make Over
This is Bruno after some Gallentian charity:
After Make Over
This is what Bruno had to say about it:
 Quote:
WOW! I feel like IĈve been living down a well all my life and Aleria has pulled me out and shown me the light! Its great to get back to my roots again! After all we were once apart of the Gallente Federation and I think we left a large part of our culture behind when we left it. I would recommend Aleria Angelis to all my Caldari friends.
Thanks Bruno! This projects been an amazing success and we hope to hold many more like this in the future.
This is your host, Aleria Angelis of The Scope, signing off.
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Lav ya lots!
-Aleria |
Joshua Foiritain
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Posted - 2006.01.24 22:03:00 -
[2]
Oh my god, where did i put my pitchfork? 
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Cerwyn Taraman
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Posted - 2006.01.24 22:51:00 -
[3]
There's got to be some sort of law being broken here..
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Kyoko Sakoda
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Posted - 2006.01.24 22:53:00 -
[4]
Originally by: Cerwyn Taraman
There's got to be some sort of law being broken here..
Fashion law, definately.
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Merv Tring
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Posted - 2006.01.24 23:00:00 -
[5]
The man really doesn't look too happy with his makeover. Or perhaps it's just his gargantuan jaw that prevents him from assuming any other facial expression; what do I know?
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Hermes, take pity upon thy faithful servant! Deliver unto me the bits for my new computer, as the last one blew up on me and EVE-withdrawal's a pain.
[i]"Out ri |
Exioce
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Posted - 2006.01.24 23:03:00 -
[6]
Originally by: Kyoko Sakoda
Originally by: Cerwyn Taraman
There's got to be some sort of law being broken here..
Fashion law, definately.
what, you don't like neon pink? 
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Samuel Rackham
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Posted - 2006.01.24 23:31:00 -
[7]
Aaaghh! You sick, sick, sick Scope reporter! My eyes, my EYES!
Keep your damned pink fruitsuits in the Federation!!
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Davion Vrynn
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Posted - 2006.01.25 00:51:00 -
[8]
Keep your sick fashion trends to your decadent Federation, thank you. The Caldari have no need of your "makeover" services.
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Captain, TCS Atropos
Security Division |
Tsual
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Posted - 2006.01.25 01:06:00 -
[9]
The wide quality spectrum of scope reportages never ceases to amaze me...
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Tsual - Highly ore adddicted. |
Kaeleron
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Posted - 2006.01.25 01:53:00 -
[10]
I think this article made me forget things I already knew.
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Karl Shade
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Posted - 2006.01.25 02:08:00 -
[11]
Originally by: Aleria Angelis
The report showed an alarming increase in what some people would term "Ugliness" outside the Federation.
Well, there certainly is one now. Makes me wish I were colour-blind.
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Malthros Zenobia
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Posted - 2006.01.25 02:10:00 -
[12]
Way to show that Gallente fashion is as big a joke as the Federation itself.
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu
I'm probably one of the biggest Bush fanboys in Eve...
This is like, Darth Vader, can't-reach-climax-without-killing-a-puppy evil.
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Jenny Spitfire
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Posted - 2006.01.25 02:12:00 -
[13]
What's next? Make-over torpedoes? 
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RecruitMe@NOINT! |
Leogan
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Posted - 2006.01.25 05:50:00 -
[14]
I, for one, find it quite becoming of the Caldarian. Those that submit themselves to the fickle vanities of The Scope fit themselves for what inevitably follows.
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Nos Gainah
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Posted - 2006.01.25 05:52:00 -
[15]
A fitting testament to Gallentean collaboration.
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Steiner
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Posted - 2006.01.25 09:35:00 -
[16]
Quote:
The Scope is the leading news agency in the world of EVE. Though based in the Federation the company takes pride in its total independence and operates separate agencies throughout the world. The Scope swings slightly to the left, but its conservative enough to be considered a reliable news agency even to the toughest businessmen and politicians.
Is this realy conservative?, what agency are you working for ? and I cant possable say this would be considered a reliable news.
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Ishtu Taakori
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Posted - 2006.01.25 09:40:00 -
[17]
Edited by: Ishtu Taakori on 25/01/2006 09:40:21
Goddamn double posts 
We are recruiting Click Me! |
Ishtu Taakori
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Posted - 2006.01.25 09:40:00 -
[18]
I knew the Federation was sick and corrupt but this is just disgraceful.
We are recruiting Click Me! |
Choke Slam
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Posted - 2006.01.25 12:41:00 -
[19]
Filthy ...
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Verone
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Posted - 2006.01.25 16:08:00 -
[20]
Verone reads with intrigue, his face curling into a broad smirk as he views the before image. Suddenly as he views the second, the comms channel erupts with a roar of laughter as he vanishes from view, and a loud thud can be heard as he falls from his chair, still crying with laughter.
Veto Member Movies |
Laocoon
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Posted - 2006.01.25 16:29:00 -
[21]
Lao stares blankly, looking confused and at a loss at what to say
wha... wh... ho... erm.... ...never mind.
<channel closed>
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(paint sigs ftl :'( )
i collect heads
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Samuel Rackham
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Posted - 2006.01.25 16:35:00 -
[22]
Originally by: Verone
Verone reads with intrigue, his face curling into a broad smirk as he views the before image. Suddenly as he views the second, the comms channel erupts with a roar of laughter as he vanishes from view, and a loud thud can be heard as he falls from his chair, still crying with laughter.
What're you laughing at, Verone!?
That's your hairstyle they stole.
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Alexandre Desaix
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Posted - 2006.01.25 16:59:00 -
[23]
It really is time someone shut The Scope down - it's embarassing reading the *******s they print these days *sighs*
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Monty Tomasi
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Posted - 2006.01.25 17:02:00 -
[24]
He has a certain rugged handsomeness that the make-over helps bring out in him. If only heĈd squint a little less, then I am sure that there are some Gallente gentlemen friends of mine whoĈd be falling over themselves to be introduced to this man.
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Takitoo
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Posted - 2006.01.25 17:11:00 -
[25]
Is that that Scope reporter who was illiterate while she was in the Summit and spread a rumor to further support her own story ?
I think it is. But that's just Scope News, I guess. My advice for your CEO: Screen your applicants for literacy and basic knowledge of news media and behavior. They are supposed to mimic reporters, no ?
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Sei du selbst. Steh zu Dir.
Die Wahrheit wird gelebt und nicht doziert. |
Verone
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Posted - 2006.01.25 17:29:00 -
[26]
Originally by: Samuel Rackham
Originally by: Verone
Verone reads with intrigue, his face curling into a broad smirk as he views the before image. Suddenly as he views the second, the comms channel erupts with a roar of laughter as he vanishes from view, and a loud thud can be heard as he falls from his chair, still crying with laughter.
What're you laughing at, Verone!?
That's your hairstyle they stole.
My hair is fine, I've had no complaints, but it just looks, so wrong on a caldari.
Veto Member Movies |
Aleria Angelis
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Posted - 2006.01.25 18:26:00 -
[27]
Edited by: Aleria Angelis on 25/01/2006 18:28:08
Originally by: Merv Tring
The man really doesn't look too happy with his makeover. Or perhaps it's just his gargantuan jaw that prevents him from assuming any other facial expression; what do I know?
Yes there are still lots of mysteries about Caldari social habits we have yet to understand. I believe his expresion to be the typical Caldari grimace of pleasure.
Originally by: Monty Tomasi
If only heĈd squint a little less, then I am sure that there are some Gallente gentlemen friends of mine whoĈd be falling over themselves to be introduced to this man.
Whilst Mr Bruno has definitely found an appreciation for his pink side, I don't think he'll be making any major lifestyle changes just yet.
Originally by: Takitoo
Is that that Scope reporter who was illiterate while she was in the Summit and spread a rumor to further support her own story ?
Unlike you we don't allow our selves to be hindered by our own egotistical elitism, any "rumour", no matter how lowly its source will be investigated in full. Rumours lead to stories Miss Takitoo, I would not be doing my job if I didnĈt ask a few questions.
You also stated in our discussion that you would rather talk to the Amarr Intelligence branch than The Scope, now might be a good time to follow your own advice.
Its interesting that everyday Gallentian fashions are taken in a completely different context when displayed on a Caldari. From viewing the comments here I can only conclude that the state is suffering from a permanent cultural repression and is too bitter towards the Federation to accept any new ideals or principles. I am glad IĈve freed at least one person from the States oppressive grasp.
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Lav ya lots!
-Aleria |
Malthros Zenobia
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Posted - 2006.01.25 19:44:00 -
[28]
I'd just like to be there when he 'thanks' you with a few missiles ripping apart your flight pod.
I still can't believe the Scope was able to hit rock bottom... then find another hole to fall in.
Originally by: Istvaan Shogaatsu
I'm probably one of the biggest Bush fanboys in Eve...
This is like, Darth Vader, can't-reach-climax-without-killing-a-puppy evil.
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Samuel Rackham
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Posted - 2006.01.25 23:07:00 -
[29]
Quote:
Its interesting that everyday Gallentian fashions are taken in a completely different context when displayed on a Caldari. From viewing the comments here I can only conclude that the state is suffering from a permanent cultural repression and is too bitter towards the Federation to accept any new ideals or principles. I am glad IĈve freed at least one person from the States oppressive grasp.
Freed him?! You've doomed the poor man to a lifetime of ridicule for wearing that pink fruitsuit you call a fashion statement. And what the hell's on his forehead? Some kind of trendy nano-tattoo? You'd might as well tattoo the word 'FAILURE' onto his forehead. I strongly doubt he'll get anywhere in the State dressed in drag. The exotic dancers that pay rent for housing in one of my hangars dress more accordingly than that spacewreck of a man!
I can't see how you think you've changed this man in a positive way. You've brainwashed the poor bastard, haven't you?! You must be with Vance and Stats! I knew it!!
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Leon 026
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Posted - 2006.01.26 01:08:00 -
[30]
Edited by: Leon 026 on 26/01/2006 01:11:41
Only the Gallente are vile and twisted enough to dare sully a man of his dignity and pride with such mockery as a "fashion" that does little more than stimulate their hormones that they are so enslaved by.
This is yet another reason why the Gallente race, most importantly those within the mockery of a news organization, 'The Scope' must be exterminated as a whole for the betterment of the future Federation.
Quote:
I, for one, find it quite becoming of the Caldarian. Those that submit themselves to the fickle vanities of The Scope fit themselves for what inevitably follows.
That Caldari disgrace needs to be stripped of his rank.
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Be Caldari, be proud.
Haak-kin k'len
Leon / LN026
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