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Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 6 post(s) |
Dimitri Chandler
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Posted - 2006.02.13 19:15:00 -
[61]
Nice post.
Have you tried CBT?
It's working for my brother who is in a similar situation.
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LOSE CHUCK |
Callie Nefarious
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Posted - 2006.02.13 19:20:00 -
[62]
Hope ya will be better soon man
chin up and try to keep smiling
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Ikvar
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Posted - 2006.02.13 19:31:00 -
[63]
 Originally by: Benilopax
Edited by: Benilopax on 13/02/2006 03:28:18
I needed to say this to all of you as it helps me sort myself out. I wanted this to be in general chat as most of my friends are here. Today i tried to destroy my own corp. I stole everything and locked everyone out of the pos' we had. This is the mail i sent explaining why:
As you all know i have been quite sick since christmas the medication i have to take causes me confusion depression and paranoia. I struggled through this and tried to
continue as CEO.
*deleted* kept picking at my actions until i couldn't stand him anymore. Aswell as my paranoia causing me to think *deleted* was trying to take the corp from me through *deleted*. When
i saw *deleted* demand the vote take place in game i realised he had a bulk of the shares. I paniced and ran for it thinking that i was being forced out.
During today I have been feeling guilt and fear that one of you will find me out of game, all due to the drugs, and even now im scared that you will find me. The pills have
caused more problems than they prevented. I am seeing the doctor on wednesday and im going to get help.
If i am right and you did plan to get rid of me my heart is broken. I need help i can admit that. I have returned everything and now i don't know what to do.
I'm sorry i have struggled with this trying to be normal and pretend i was fine but something is wrong with me.
I felt bullied by some corp members and felt stupid. Some of you have still tried to speak kindly to me I thank you.
And now i will take my ship to alpa and face my punishment................. I'm sorry everyone.
This game is a powerfull thing people say it's just a game but it can suck you in so much things like this happen.
Yet i do love it so much.
I'm on the road to getting better and i hope i can return to you all soon.
Thanks
Benilopax.
Lol.
Originally by: Avon
I actually enjoy crafting in EQ2.
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Kurren
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Posted - 2006.02.13 19:32:00 -
[64]
You know, 'cept for a few people, this thread makes me wonder why people think so poorly of the Eve community!
I know what its like Ben. I was put on Welbutrin for depression and the problem only got worse. I stopped taking it and realized that "people are people and are going to be people, there is nothing I can do to change how they are" and BAM, like an Interceptor with an MWD on it, I started feeling better.
Hang in there, you'll be fine in no time!
SobaKai.com
-Devs, please don't destroy my ENTIRE signature next time!-
Noted - Please send more ISK -Capsicum
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Coranor
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Posted - 2006.02.13 20:27:00 -
[65]
I hope you get yourself sorted out good man. Really it takes a lot of courage to stand up and apologise and accept that you need help for something like this so I salute you for it.
Best of luck.
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The AntiCrust
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Posted - 2006.02.13 20:45:00 -
[66]
If the drugs made you act as you did then they, as mature people, will understand. They will band together and help you through what ever problems you have.
Unfortunatly, if they do not, they are not friends.
Hope all is sorted as fast as possible for you, and dont let the paranoia get to you.
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Harry Voyager
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Posted - 2006.02.13 20:50:00 -
[67]
I've been on medications with mind altering effects before. In my case it was an antibiotic that, for me, caused mild dementia.
I ended up presenting a second of my senior design project under the full influence of it. I had had to break it down for transit, and when I attempted to reassemble it, I ended up scramblign the wiring on it. I had one of the batteries shorted to itself, the op amps wired in backwards. It was a mess, and I wasn't even lucid enough to realise how badly I had screwed it up.
Fortunatly, it wore off a few hours after takign each dose, so I did sober up enough to realise what had happened. I altered when I was taking my doses, and fortunatly was off it before the filan report had to be turned in. Still, the over all effect cost me at least half a letter grade on the project.
Re: Blackhole: This has very little to do with Eve. This is a pure chemical imbalance in his brain causing him to act this erratically, and turning off every computer in the house isn't going to fix this any more than it would fix a case of whooping cough. That being said, it would still be for the best to reduce your corp responsibilities dramatically for the duration. Even if staying home with the cough doesn't shorted the duration much, it still isn't terribly helpful to go tearing around the neighborhood with it.
Harry Voyager
____________________
I'm not an idiot; I just play one on the forums. |
revren
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Posted - 2006.02.13 20:59:00 -
[68]
Good Luck with everything
I hope that your meds get sorted out, and that in turn every tihng else does.
Revren
Friend of Bill W.
Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones. You sure you got today's codes? |
Major Skillz
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Posted - 2006.02.13 21:18:00 -
[69]
Drugs kills.
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CiNi
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Posted - 2006.02.13 21:35:00 -
[70]
this took real guts to do
as everyone said u are getting help and thats the hardest part of all over with.
good luck to you Benilopax
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Velocitee
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Posted - 2006.02.13 22:24:00 -
[71]
It takes both courage and insight to admit a problem within yourself. I admire and respect that in a day and age where it is so easy to not take responsibility for your own actions, health, and life.
/signed, with respect and sympathy.
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Nyphur
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Posted - 2006.02.13 22:45:00 -
[72]
I haven't done quite as much as you but I have definitely let my corp and probably my alliance down. I've been depressed for about a year now. Some corpmates left eve due to boredom. They came back when I was having a good time but it didn't last and now I'm only ever on eve once a day for POS maintenance and maybe a few hours throughout the week for other things. I'm sure my corp are getting mighty bored. I'll occasionally feel bad about it and if I'm sufficiently happy at the time I'll start some kind of corp venture but it always ends up dying or being particularly underwhelming when I get depressed again and lose enthusiasm. I throw isk at them, as if to make up for it and make myself feel less guilty.
I'm not on medication for my depression but it's been a year now and it doesn't seem to be getting any better. For what it's worth, if you're reading this Pillowsoft, I'm sorry for not being active enough and taking enough interest in eve and in you guys. I'll try to make it up to you. Next week we can all go complex hunting in a COSMOS constellation or something.
Eve-Tanking.com - For the ultimate tanking spreadsheet and resources. |
Supox
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Posted - 2006.02.13 22:51:00 -
[73]
Benilopax,
I sincerely hope you get through this and I suggest that you consult with a psychiatrist while you are taking this medication to try and deal with these borderline mania symptoms. My wife suffers from bipolar disorder, and while she does very well with a combination of medications to help regulate her mood, I am very familiar with this kind of behavior.
People here should know that in cases of psychological health, everyone will react differently to a medication. What will work for one person may have nasty effects for another. The key is to get a good doctor to work with you regular physician to help you deal with these mood issues/dark thoughts you are having. You are already on our way to getting the help you need, you just need to go a little farther. Whatever you do, make sure you tell your family and good friends what is going on, because when you are not well you may not be able to communicate all of your symptoms to your doctor about what is happening (and that is where your family & friends need to know so they can help you). I have had to personally take my wife to the hospital before when she was 'not well', and I know how important it was for me to be there not only as a loving husband but as the primary observer of my wife's behavior and was able to talk to the doctor on staff about her condition and what led to her having a manic episode (for those wondering, those that suffer from bipolar disorder have serious problems when their sleep cycles are disrupted - they need a full 8 hrs of restfull sleep or else problems may develop that can lead to a manic episode).
I sincerely hope you get the medical attention you need right now and hope you get better. We all have our real life problems, for some they are less visible than others.
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Wrangler
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Posted - 2006.02.13 22:59:00 -
[74]
Sorry to hear about it, I hope you'll get better. Sometimes you just have to give it time.
If there's anything we (CRC/ISD) can do for you, please contact me using the [email protected] email.
[Read the Rules!] - [Contact us]
I <3 Imaran, he is for teh sexeh winÖ; But Eris Discordia beats them all ; Apart from Imaran, because he's Teh PwnÖ; IBTL - Imaran; *click* -Capsicum; IATL - Ductoris; h4x - Imaran  ; Jacques - the fastest lock in teh Galaxy; I are t3h roxeur - Eshtir; /me 4TW - Imaran; Be my godfather? - Santi; Hi Mom! o/ --Jorauk; Wrangler likes sheep -Zhuge
Due to lack of funds the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off, remember to upgrade your clone! |
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Galk
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Posted - 2006.02.13 23:28:00 -
[75]
Seriously.
If it's that bad, there's one thing you realy don't want to be doing, playing eve... sorry to say, but this game is very bad for you if your suffering that way.
Best advice i can give you for depression is good times with your friends, work hard, and keep an active mind.
You won't be able to stop it all of the time (you will dwell on things), but you can cut most of it out by doing that sort of stuff, and time heals the rest....
It's good advice, even if i don't swallow it myself all of the time. Been through a couple of serious situations in my life and come out smiling the other side, allways makes me feel stronger talking about it with others when i see others struggling in life, sharing my experiences with people and understanding theirs, it normaly helps in the shorterm, one person makes the difference in the end.
Gl with yourself.
______
Long ago one gorgeous night, we let the stars grow free.
We let Zhuge do that once, he came back carrying a traffic cone, a forsale sign and three empty bottles of dutch lager. He also lost his Zimmer Frame... - Imaran
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Nyphur
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Posted - 2006.02.14 01:43:00 -
[76]
For what little it's worth, if things don't work out with your corp, you're welcome in my humble little corp. I've only ever allowed people I have known for years and trust into it. Or maybe we could get together with your corp and have some fun somewhere?
If this thread has shown anything, it's that you have a lot of would-be friends in eve, even if some of your corpmates who hold a lot of shares don't rank among them.
Eve-Tanking.com - For the ultimate tanking spreadsheet and resources. |
Karistis
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Posted - 2006.02.14 03:51:00 -
[77]
Get well soon. 
Posting like this took some serious guts. *salutes*
_________________________________________
2005.01.17 22:04:22 combat Chackle [PUSY] perfectly runs from you, wrecking for 1500 cowardice. |
Waldo Barnstormer
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Posted - 2006.02.14 05:12:00 -
[78]
good luck and get better soon
loose = "not rigidly fastened or securely attached" | lose = "fail to win" |
Soulita
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Posted - 2006.02.14 10:40:00 -
[79]
Respect hombre.
Your post shows you have the inner strength to pull through this easily. You just need to activate it (but you probably already have, takes guts to do a post like yours)
Take the situation as it is as a challenge, cause thats what it is.
GL and get better soon!
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Steven Dynahir
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Posted - 2006.02.14 10:50:00 -
[80]
Originally by: BlackHole Bob
Originally by: My grandfather
Originally by: BlackHole Bob
Edited by: BlackHole Bob on 13/02/2006 04:21:55
At this time till you get grounded you honestly should not play any mmo...
seriously...
you have addiction and social issues beyond eve...
get help...first step cancel you eve accounts until you get grounded....
most off all...dont turn your computer on unless you have to use one at work for 90 days...
I am dead serious...you have issues that need resolution beyond eve for sure...and eve is NOT the issue...nor are the players your dealing with...
its like any addiction...you will need proper and positive help
Please read the post carefully before replying. He doesn't say he has an addiction, or any other problem with eve. His problems are purely RL.
Ben, You'll pull through. I'm sure of that. You already showed you are willing to search help, and that is 50% of the way.
I read the post carefully...very in fact...
Read my reply carefully...ecspecially the last few lines...
am dead serious...you have issues that need resolution beyond eve for sure...and eve is NOT the issue...nor are the players your dealing with...
its like any addiction...you will need proper and positive help
then go back and read his carefully..ecspecially this line...
During today I have been feeling guilt and fear that one of you will find me out of game, all due to the drugs, and even now im scared that you will find me. The pills have
caused more problems than they prevented. I am seeing the doctor on wednesday and im going to get help.
obviously if hes feeling like people are coming to get him in real life then he doesn't need to devote anytime to any game until he cleans up his pills and social and real life bro...
intervention is great when done well..
in this case there is nothing anyone here can do but offer him sympathy and support...
i will leave that up to professional experts on mental health...
either way, as bad as he sounds overall in or out of game he needs to see a professional and not eve online forum player help.
I have watched many a friends life go down the tubes over online games from divorce to addiction to loss of jobs and assets and more... all over a SOCIAL GAME.
In the end the only thing that truly helped was to first remove the social disorder access and that means computers and implement new paths to social and mental solutions rather then pills and games.
just like removing the booze and not going to the bars...
his pills and online gaming it seems combine to deliver what seem to be paranoid delusions...all revolving around social behavoir
im no mental health expert but i know online gaming addiction and social disorder when i see it..
I DO WISH ALWAYS, IN ANY ASPECT, A SPEEDY RECOVERY.
GO spend time with a loved one out of game...get support and intervention from people whom you can see touch smell and feel. Reaching to the forums for it is more like a cry for sympathy and a misguided path to denial. Admitting it to your closest loved ones will do alot more then to some people he will never meet here on the forums.
seek professional help...I hope somehow life works out for you and eve continues to a form of enjoyment rather then an aweful addicted socially horrible expierience because you take to many pills.
I read this line...
Quote:
As you all know i have been quite sick since christmas the medication i have to take causes me confusion depression and paranoia.
..and it seems to imply that he has some sort of sickness, which is treated with medication. And this medication makes him paranoid.
Say an example, you got an narcolepsia and get anphetamine for that => possibility for paranoidic behavior.
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Regional Sell orders |
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Skellibjalla
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Posted - 2006.02.14 10:56:00 -
[81]
Amazing... This game is a powerful thing because it is real to such a great degree.
Life is a garden of perceptions. Pick your fruit.
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Zekks MarKeys
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Posted - 2006.02.14 12:11:00 -
[82]
Hey something similar happened to me when i was at uni. I was struggling to sleep so started taking nitol.
These pills did not have a good affect on me and i got paranoid which ended with me thinking this guy in my class was out to destroy me. I made his life hell for 2 weeks nothing to serious i'd put him
down and talk about him to people totaly out of character. Anyway my friends started to get worried about me and told me to stop taking the nitol. Few days later i was back to normal and spoke to the
guy i'd been paranoid about he was really shocked and understanding and i had to go around explaining that he wasn't a bad guy it was the meds i'd been taking. So now you've explained hopefully they will understand 
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Eddie
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Posted - 2006.02.14 12:27:00 -
[83]
Get well again soon m8
Originally by: TomB
It is a good day to be Jove
oh thank GOD! I thought you were gonna wave the nerf bat around in this thread
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Mr Blue
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Posted - 2006.02.14 12:38:00 -
[84]
OMGWTFPWND!! FREGE SUCKASS //zcinner
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jukriamrr
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Posted - 2006.02.14 12:39:00 -
[85]
RL first first first...
Go take a walk to the mountaintop and breathe fresh air.
All the best, and congratulations for the honesty of your post, which should come forward as a reminder of MMOG's dangers!
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CdCommander
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Posted - 2006.02.14 12:39:00 -
[86]
Originally by: Mr Blue
OMGWTFPWND!! FREGE SUCKASS //zcinner
rofl
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Lord Wamphyri
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Posted - 2006.02.14 13:00:00 -
[87]
/SIGNED
Good luck with everything dude, I hope things work out for you real soon.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
If I was a bit more clever I could think of a witty sig :(
Consider yourself done - Cortes |
Dumus
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Posted - 2006.02.14 13:20:00 -
[88]
Peace to you and yours. See you when you get back.
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Virida
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Posted - 2006.02.14 13:25:00 -
[89]
Good luck, hope your doctor can help you getting an better treatment, i know of some in my family with simmiliar problems, and know how hard it can be.
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Raem Civrie
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Posted - 2006.02.14 13:28:00 -
[90]
Originally by: The AntiCrust
If the drugs made you act as you did then they, as mature people, will understand. They will band together and help you through what ever problems you have.
Unfortunatly, if they do not, they are not friends.
Hope all is sorted as fast as possible for you, and dont let the paranoia get to you.
You'd be surprised. It's extremely hard for people to understand severe depression and the many little niggling problems that can follow it (anxiety, paranoia, sociophobia, etc), if they haven't experienced it themselves or witnessed it firsthand.
The sad fact is that often, patients stand alone.
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God-King of Genitalia |
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