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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.19 18:32:00 -
[91]
Edited by: Nachshon on 19/02/2007 18:34:20 Use marker to draw a sign to lure your victim to a safe spot out of town. Connect the joystick to a remote-control car with a VERY long wire. Drive the remote control car around the guy to tie him up. Smash the joystick. Use the pieces to cut him open. Perform Aztec heart sacrifice.
A cashew nut and a mousepad.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |
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BH Runner
ISD BH Interstellar Services Department

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Posted - 2007.02.19 21:36:00 -
[92]
Originally by: Nachshon A cashew nut and a mousepad.
Cut mousepad into several cm wide strips; tie series of strips together to make 3 lengths of rubber bind rope; use first length to bind victims hands; use second length to bind victims feet; use third length to gently strangle the victim until the point just prior to them passing out; release the bind around the throat; as they rapdily inhale a breath, flick the cashew nut into the back of their wide open mouth; generating a forcible inhalation the foreign object deep enough to create a blockage of their windpipe; skip using the released third rope whilst watching them die peacefully.
A blowtorch and a pair of pliers (remember novel methods only )
[Bug Report Here] - [Contact Us] |
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.19 22:37:00 -
[93]
Use blowtorch to melt pliers. Pour molten pliers down his throat.
A teddy bear and a box of Pokemon cards.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

Macrowarp
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Posted - 2007.02.19 23:09:00 -
[94]
Quote: A teddy bear and a box of Pokemon cards.
Make clean insertion into teddy with the Fire Turtle card, then insert Pikachu card into the stuffing, GRANTING HIM A SOUL OF ETERNAL WICKEDNESS AND DESTRUCTION. Convince him that your friend is a rival pokemon master hellbent on your destruction. Watch as teddy maims your friend with upmost glee and rejoice at the impact vapor flashes.
A red haired Scotsman and Kofi Annan.
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WarriorDuck
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Posted - 2007.02.20 07:22:00 -
[95]
Edited by: WarriorDuck on 20/02/2007 07:18:56
Originally by: Macrowarp
Quote: A teddy bear and a box of Pokemon cards.
Make clean insertion into teddy with the Fire Turtle card, then insert Pikachu card into the stuffing, GRANTING HIM A SOUL OF ETERNAL WICKEDNESS AND DESTRUCTION. Convince him that your friend is a rival pokemon master hellbent on your destruction. Watch as teddy maims your friend with upmost glee and rejoice at the impact vapor flashes.
A red haired Scotsman and Kofi Annan.
Send victim for 72-hole golf game with said Scotsman and Kofi Annan. Watch as Scotsman beats victim to death with 6-iron for not knowing scots invented the game, followed by Kofi using 3 Wood as a suppository on Scotsman as retribution for Rwandan genocide. Scotsman retaliates with Guiness bottle to the face, and Kofi calls UN nuclear strike in, annihilating all of scotland and saving us from kilts forever....
cup full of wet ciggarette butts and a bottle of Lousiana hot sauce.
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Copine Callmeknau
The Splinter Syndicate SMASH Alliance
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Posted - 2007.02.20 11:54:00 -
[96]
Originally by: WarriorDuck cup full of wet ciggarette butts and a bottle of Lousiana hot sauce.
Force victim to eat the wet cigarrette butts, when he's done smash the cup and cut open the abdomen. Attempt to replace any bodily fluids you may find inside any internal organs with copious quantities of hot sauce
Have sex with the corpse, the hot sauce will make for an interesting experience.
6 wooden toothpicks & An empty can of canadian club and coke
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Originally by: wrong on so many levels you couldn't be more wrong if you were tuxford
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.21 01:51:00 -
[97]
Break the can, use it to cut yourself. Pour all blood onto broken can, dip the toothpicks in them, then get a bandage. Stab victim in the eyes with the toothpicks. Watch him run around blind and in agony. Eventually, he will step on the broken can and cut himself. He dies of blood poisoning.
NOTE: Only works if you and your victim have incompatible blood types. If you have compatible blood types, jam the smashed can down his throat and stab him in sensitive places with the toothpicks.
A wireless card and an IDF yarmulke (IDF=Israeli Defence Forces, yarmulke=Jewish skullcap)
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

Curzon Dax
Eve University Ivy League
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Posted - 2007.02.21 13:10:00 -
[98]
Originally by: Crumplecorn
Originally by: Curzon Dax Neither a small novel nor a butterfly can be effectively used to kill someone.
Moving on....
A stick of gum and a pair of sunglasses.
Use small novel to crush butterfly, and while target is still feeling shocked punch repeatedly in the gut, until you reach the spine.

And Chew gum slightly. Offer sunglasses to target. Punch in lenses, damaging eyes of target. Attempt to insert chewed gum into anus (their's, not your's). Target runs into busy street and gets hit by bus.
Alvarr, you said that just because my creative talent cant'c ome up with a way to use a small novel and a butterfly to kill someone doesn't mean I should skip it? Exactly how are the two items being utilized here? Its a fist being used to kill someone with the two items simply being used as props. Feel free to use your own imagination and only those two items to come up with a way to kill someone.
Training the butterfly to do something isn't plausible, nor is boring them to death reading Vogon poetry from the small novel. Please! Entertain us!
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Strangely Brown
Cult of the Purple Wolf
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Posted - 2007.02.21 14:04:00 -
[99]
Originally by: Curzon Dax Alvarr, you said that just because my creative talent cant'c ome up with a way to use a small novel and a butterfly to kill someone doesn't mean I should skip it? Exactly how are the two items being utilized here? Its a fist being used to kill someone with the two items simply being used as props. Feel free to use your own imagination and only those two items to come up with a way to kill someone.
Training the butterfly to do something isn't plausible, nor is boring them to death reading Vogon poetry from the small novel. Please! Entertain us!
Yes because all the other methods used in this thread are 100% plausible 
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Constantine Arcanum
IMPERIAL SENATE Pure.
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Posted - 2007.02.21 20:53:00 -
[100]
Originally by: Curzon Dax
Originally by: Crumplecorn
Originally by: Curzon Dax Neither a small novel nor a butterfly can be effectively used to kill someone.
Moving on....
A stick of gum and a pair of sunglasses.
Use small novel to crush butterfly, and while target is still feeling shocked punch repeatedly in the gut, until you reach the spine.

And Chew gum slightly. Offer sunglasses to target. Punch in lenses, damaging eyes of target. Attempt to insert chewed gum into anus (their's, not your's). Target runs into busy street and gets hit by bus.
Alvarr, you said that just because my creative talent cant'c ome up with a way to use a small novel and a butterfly to kill someone doesn't mean I should skip it? Exactly how are the two items being utilized here? Its a fist being used to kill someone with the two items simply being used as props. Feel free to use your own imagination and only those two items to come up with a way to kill someone.
Training the butterfly to do something isn't plausible, nor is boring them to death reading Vogon poetry from the small novel. Please! Entertain us!
I didn't say they had to be plausible. I am the thread-lord. Use your imagination!
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Pwn4ge P4nts
Caldari Provisions
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Posted - 2007.02.21 21:58:00 -
[101]
Edited by: Pwn4ge P4nts on 21/02/2007 21:56:49
Quote: A wireless card and an IDF yarmulke (IDF=Israeli Defence Forces, yarmulke=Jewish skullcap)
Connect wireless card to IDF yarr-mulke and announce that you can offer wireless YARR-mulke connection to Jewdism FOR FREE. When person comes running for this too-good-to-be-true offer you unplug said wireless card THUS RENDERING THE YARR-OMGBBQ-MULKE USELESS. Watch as person dies of disappointment. Place cap on corpse's head. Throw wireless card away.

A 6 year old schoolgirl and an eyepatch wearing, peg-leg using cat o' the Seas.
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Aybabtu
Dirty Deeds Corp. Axiom Empire
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Posted - 2007.02.22 04:01:00 -
[102]
Edited by: Aybabtu on 22/02/2007 03:58:33 A 6 year old schoolgirl and an eyepatch wearing, peg-leg using cat o' the Seas.
well.. you take the eye patch off the guy put it on the victim, and then scoop his other eye out with your toes... , then using the peg leg keep smacking him over the head with it as Big Ben chimes.. 1 am.. 1 hit.. 2 am 2 hits... 5 am 5 hits.. etc untill he snuffs it...
then you deliver the 6 year old school girl to her parents to offset the evillness you just did to the poor dude...
A copy of winows Vista + a commador 64..
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DUFFMANX
D-Generation X
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Posted - 2007.02.22 07:01:00 -
[103]
Originally by: Aybabtu A copy of winows Vista + a commador 64..
Give the copy of vista to some1 to install on their comp and watch as they get frustrated from how crap it is. While they are distracted by this useless software beat them to death with the commodore 64 which is also crap.
A phone bill + bottle of cider vinegar
Originally by: dimensionZ The biggest threat we ever had was xirtam mining plagioclase in aridia ...
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.23 05:26:00 -
[104]
Quote: A phone bill + bottle of cider vinegar
Alter the phone bill so that it is gigantic. Have the victim then drink the cider vinegar. Then give the phone bill to the victim and tell him that it is his. He has an ulcer, and the combination of vinegar and stomach acid eats a hole in his stomach. He dies.
A souvenir Eiffel Tower and an SAT admission ticket.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

xOm3gAx
Caldari Stain of Mind DAMAGE INC...
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Posted - 2007.02.24 02:26:00 -
[105]
Originally by: Nachshon
Quote: A phone bill + bottle of cider vinegar
Alter the phone bill so that it is gigantic. Have the victim then drink the cider vinegar. Then give the phone bill to the victim and tell him that it is his. He has an ulcer, and the combination of vinegar and stomach acid eats a hole in his stomach. He dies.
A souvenir Eiffel Tower and an SAT admission ticket.
Hand them the ticket and stab them in teh face with the tower souvenir or the throat if u don't want htem to scream.
A cigarette and a match. ----------- "Mercinaries never die, we just go to hell to regroup." -xOm3gAx '99
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Constantine Arcanum
IMPERIAL SENATE Pure.
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Posted - 2007.02.24 02:42:00 -
[106]
Originally by: xOm3gAx
A cigarette and a match.
Light the cigarette with the match and throw the burnt out match at him, annoying him slightly. Enjoy the cigarette, and stub it out against your tongue. Whilst he is marvelling at your incredible pain tolerance, lamp him in the jaw. He will possibly fall onto the burnt out match, and have a haemorrhage.
A bottle of Tommy Hilfiger and an Ethernet cable.
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.24 06:06:00 -
[107]
Edited by: Nachshon on 24/02/2007 06:04:57 Shove the bottle of Tommy Hilfinger up his nose. As he falls to the ground in a panic, tie up his feet with the cable, and tie the other end to a starving badger. Badger eats him.
A khumaak and an Ultra! Promotional Holoreel.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

Constantine Arcanum
IMPERIAL SENATE Pure.
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Posted - 2007.02.24 19:16:00 -
[108]
Originally by: Nachshon Edited by: Nachshon on 24/02/2007 06:04:57 Shove the bottle of Tommy Hilfinger up his nose. As he falls to the ground in a panic, tie up his feet with the cable, and tie the other end to a starving badger. Badger eats him.
A khumaak and an Ultra! Promotional Holoreel.
you don't really have those in your room.
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Aladoth Mars
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Posted - 2007.02.24 20:36:00 -
[109]
Originally by: Nachshon Edited by: Nachshon on 24/02/2007 06:04:57 Shove the bottle of Tommy Hilfinger up his nose. As he falls to the ground in a panic, tie up his feet with the cable, and tie the other end to a starving badger. Badger eats him.
A khumaak and an Ultra! Promotional Holoreel.
hmm though one,
Use the khumaak to ***** open the Holoreel, and then take the spring out to hold open the victims eyes, then play the holoreel over and over untill he begs for you to kill him, Then deprieve him of his wish then bash him over the head with the Khumaak but dont kill him, once the batterys of the holoreel run out take it apart peice by piece and then shove each piece into his mouth then shove it down his throat with the khumaak.
sorry it was very hard to come up with something,
BEtter luck to the next guy, A Armegeddon and a green tree frog.
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.24 20:46:00 -
[110]
First, starve the tree frog. Put the victim into the Armageddon's pod.
If he goes into mind-lock (99.9999% chance): Take him out. Feed him to the tree frog.
If he can use pods (0.0001% chance): Feed the frog until it looks healthy and cute. Threaten to kill the frog unless victim agrees to destroy BoB's titan. Meanwhile, jam the frog into the guy's clone's throat. After he dies and gets podded, he chokes to death.
A desk calendar and a USB key.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

xOm3gAx
Caldari Stain of Mind DAMAGE INC...
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Posted - 2007.02.25 03:53:00 -
[111]
Originally by: Nachshon First, starve the tree frog. Put the victim into the Armageddon's pod.
If he goes into mind-lock (99.9999% chance): Take him out. Feed him to the tree frog.
If he can use pods (0.0001% chance): Feed the frog until it looks healthy and cute. Threaten to kill the frog unless victim agrees to destroy BoB's titan. Meanwhile, jam the frog into the guy's clone's throat. After he dies and gets podded, he chokes to death.
A desk calendar and a USB key.
Hit them in the back of the head and knock them out roll the desk calendar up real tight and thin and force it down their throat so they choke to death. Shove the usb key in their eye socket for good measure.
A napkin and a lint ball. ----------- "Mercinaries never die, we just go to hell to regroup." -xOm3gAx '99
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My grandfather
Amarr Clan Shadow Wolf Sylph Alliance
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Posted - 2007.02.25 04:00:00 -
[112]
Use the napkin to cover the victim's eyes, then push the lint into one ear till it comes out the other. Floss.
An electric guitar and a cactus.
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.25 19:09:00 -
[113]
Use the power cord from the electric guitar to tie them up. Jam the guitar down their throat. Then, before they choke to death, jam the cactus up their urethra. Video tape the whole thing and sell the video to people with cactus fetishists.
A statistics textbook and a feather.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

xOm3gAx
Caldari Stain of Mind DAMAGE INC...
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Posted - 2007.02.25 22:05:00 -
[114]
Edited by: xOm3gAx on 25/02/2007 22:01:39
Originally by: Nachshon Use the power cord from the electric guitar to tie them up. Jam the guitar down their throat. Then, before they choke to death, jam the cactus up their urethra. Video tape the whole thing and sell the video to people with cactus fetishists.
A statistics textbook and a feather.
make the victim read the text book and once they pass out from boredum shove the feather up the nose and begin the brain removal =P
A strand of hair and a dab of dried up glue ----------- "Mercinaries never die, we just go to hell to regroup." -xOm3gAx '99
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Krulla
Minmatar Queens of the Stone Age Anarchy Empire
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Posted - 2007.02.25 22:55:00 -
[115]
Soak the hair in glue, shove the hair down victim's throat, causing suffocation.
A wallet and a bass guitar. ------------------------- Sigs are for noobs. |

xOm3gAx
Caldari Stain of Mind DAMAGE INC...
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Posted - 2007.02.25 23:54:00 -
[116]
Edited by: xOm3gAx on 25/02/2007 23:50:26
Originally by: Krulla Soak the hair in glue, shove the hair down victim's throat, causing suffocation.
A wallet and a bass guitar.
Tie the victim up with the guitars cord shove wallet down throat causing suffocation keep the guitar.
An empty pack of smokes and a pencil eraser. ----------- "Mercinaries never die, we just go to hell to regroup." -xOm3gAx '99
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Icheckjitamarketlol
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Posted - 2007.02.26 00:24:00 -
[117]
Buy another pack of smokes, fill the empty pack with the cigs from the new pack, use eraser to erase surgeon general's warning, give pack to victim.
Victim succumbs to lung cancer 40 years later, ignorant of the fact that smoking is unhealthy.
A condom and a piece of chocolate.
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Nachshon
Caldari Gradient Namtz'aar k'in
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Posted - 2007.02.26 01:41:00 -
[118]
Eat the chocolate, entering a sugar-rush frenzy. This will give you the strength to pull the condom over the victim's head, suffocating him.
A telephone and a moist towelette.
__________________________________________ What I say should not be taken as the position of Gradient or NMTZ. |

xOm3gAx
Caldari Stain of Mind DAMAGE INC...
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Posted - 2007.02.26 04:46:00 -
[119]
Originally by: Nachshon Eat the chocolate, entering a sugar-rush frenzy. This will give you the strength to pull the condom over the victim's head, suffocating him.
A telephone and a moist towelette.
Beat the victim in the back of hte head to knock them out with the phone and hten strangle them with the cord cleaning it off with the moist towelette afterwards.
A key ring and a gum wrapper. ----------- "Mercinaries never die, we just go to hell to regroup." -xOm3gAx '99
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Krulla
Minmatar Queens of the Stone Age Anarchy Empire
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Posted - 2007.02.26 13:20:00 -
[120]
Offer victim gum, but stab him in the eye with the keys instead. Stab him again until he stops moving.
A mobile phone and a black hoodie. ------------------------- Sigs are for noobs. |
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