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Soporo
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Posted - 2007.01.24 09:53:00 -
[1]
Edited by: Soporo on 24/01/2007 09:54:23 Ok, this is not a post directed specifically at any one person.
It's just that I don't recall reading anything about the sort of stuff that happens on voice chat and would like to voice my opinions.
Been playing online games for a while, used Battlecoms back in the day, used Vent, mostly use TS2 now, and some things just trip my trigger about some people who use chat. Yes this is an expanded rip off of one of my earlier postings in some thread.
Different types of people you may encounter: I encounter these, have I missed any?
Body Noise Man. Sneezes, sniffles, coughs, blows nose, eats noisy chips and swallows beverages sounding like a horse watering, never uses "push to talk".
Loud As Sh*t Man. Talks vehemently, loudly, and doesnt know if people can hear him well so he just ensures maximum vollume at all times. Might use PTT, but it wouldnt matter as he is so loud you can hear him in the next State anyway.
Lives in A Can Man. His voice is emanating from deep withing a large tin can. This man is often amusing to others ...for a while. I have been the Lives In A Can Man myself.
Reverb Man This man is the bane of organized voice chat, as his setup is causing reverberations which drive ***** coverd, flaming iron spikes of purgatory into everyone skull.
The Hoarse Whisperer. (also known as the Barely Audible Man) This man, due to bad setup/hardware/ or mere volume is barely detectable and is easily overridden by the likes of The Body Noise Man or his true antithesis, the Loud As Sh*t Man. This man can sometimes make his wishes known by screaming into his Mic and possibly alarming his neighbors.
The Talks Too Damn Much Man This man keeps up an incessant stream of conversation with everyone or no one. He likes commenting on politics, religion, and anything else that people should avoid in a multinational voice chat. Valuable information is rarely, if ever, passed on and the topics in use are usually boring as sh*t. This man will likely be dead before 40 due to lack of oxygen.
The Drunkard This man is perpetually drunk or stoned and kindly ensures that everyone knows by just how much. His favorite topics are about various brain cell killing chemicals that he snorts, shoots, smokes, eats or imbibes. This man is sometimes vastly amusing. This man is sometimes extraordinarily dangerous and aggravating to his friends. This man doesnt use PTT unless he notices the cops beating on his door.
The Get Me Some Pie Man This man interracts loudly and often with persons in physical proximity to him. These are usually family members, and anyone who spends any time on coms with him soon learn far too much about this mans affairs. He never uses PTT as he doesnt mind people hearing things like "wtf baby, is that rash gone yet?", or "make me some pie", or noises like babies and dogs crying in the background while Dizzy X plays at 6 billion decibles.
Darth Vader Man This man always has a Mic too close to his mouth and sounds amazingly like darth Vader. Upon recieving multiple complaints, he adjusts the set, which lasts for a whole 2 minutes. This man will never suffer the Talks Too Damn Much Man's fate, as he has an extremely healthy oxygen intake.
It's late/early as hell, more to come possibly, for now just try to add to the list. |
ArtemisEntreri
Turbulent
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:05:00 -
[2]
The I have speakers man This guy has speakers, and when you talk he will let you hear yourself talk every time.
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Freya Runestone
Minmatar Sacred Dark
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:11:00 -
[3]
a bit similar to the "talks too much" guy this one guy i used to talk to had a way of saying nothing at all with incredibly many words __________________________________
need a new sig :( |
Araxmas
Black Lance Against ALL Authorities
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:14:00 -
[4]
The inzomniac Voice is a tad quiet and constantly sounds like they have a cold. Typically grouchy and usually need to be told five times where to set the autopilot to. Most probably will die due to caffine overdose.
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Mallikanth
Minmatar
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:25:00 -
[5]
You forgot...
THE INVISIBLE MAN He hasn't got PTT and is not at his Computer - You hear his whole house moving around, talking, the dog chasing the cat etc....
The difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong, it usually turns out to be impossible |
Calsak
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:28:00 -
[6]
Sound Bite Man This man usually plays sound bites from TV shows or songs into TS and bleeds over everyone. Thinks he is some kind of DJ or a Comedian but in reality he is just plain annoying.
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Araxmas
Black Lance Against ALL Authorities
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:32:00 -
[7]
Originally by: Mallikanth You forgot...
THE INVISIBLE MAN He hasn't got PTT and is not at his Computer - You hear his whole house moving around, talking, the dog chasing the cat etc....
Heh happened to me about a week ago. My vent settings reset themselves for some reason and I went afk for a bit. --------
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Noluck Ned
FATAL REVELATIONS FATAL Alliance
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Posted - 2007.01.24 10:54:00 -
[8]
The Prophet of Doom
This voicecomms user is a real-life pessimist and is not afraid of sharing his visions of total annihilation with the rest of the alliance. His forcasts include but are not limited to: "We cant win this one", "There are waaaay too many of them", "we are gonna get owned" and "WTF, this FC is going to get us all killed"
This type is not to be confused with:
The Panic Mechanic
This poor guy lives in a constant state of nervous tension, the mere sight of a nuetral in local will raise the tone of his voice by several octaves. An enemy fleet will cause him to enter "Rabbit in the headlights" mode and you will be lucky to hear more from him for at least an hour after the battle is over.
Mr Potty-Mouth
Needs no introduction. I am not adverse to a few well chosen curses from time to time but this type takes it to a whole new level. Lets just say that he uses epithets for punctuation. Even the presence of that rarest of breeds, the real-life female gamer, or underage corp mates will deter Mr Potty Mouth from spewing. Usually hving this type lurking about will lead to looong and heated forum discusions between the Pro and Anti swearing brigade.
Luckily my current corp has been able to avoid these types so far.
F4T4L - Recruitment |
Apocryphai
Caldari
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:06:00 -
[9]
The Impenetrable Accent Man Has an accent so extreme that nobody, from anywhere, can understand a word he says. Applies to anyone from any country except your own of course.
Originally by: Victor Valka What the skull-chick said.
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Gen Kumon
Caldari Pirates of Destruction Union
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:14:00 -
[10]
Heh. Truth. I've seen several people that match these, and have come a little close to "The Talks Too Damn Much Man" a few times, but never quite crossed the line.
That said, do the names remind anyone else of Megaman bosses?
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infraX
Caldari Finite Horizon
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:19:00 -
[11]
lol, great thread - had me laughing. Funny how a few of these descriptions remind me of certain people from different corps as well as other games I have played over the years. There was one person in my current corp that I could not place into a category and so feel the need to introduce...
The Washing Machine Man This guy seems to live inside a giant washing machine as all sorts of knocks and bangs eminate from his atmosphere. He seems to have no way to make it all stop and doesn't mind if he sounds like a cross between someong slurping down a Mcdonalds Milkshake and your Grandma's rusty old boiler.
(yes Hellwarrior this is you!)
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Kung Zao
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:23:00 -
[12]
OMG I can't stop laughing!! you win at eve
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ScreamingLord Sutch
Hand in Mouth
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:24:00 -
[13]
We have a drunkard, loud as **** pottymouth in our corp.
If we could get him high and unleash him on an enemys voicecomms he'd be worth a fleet of titans
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DarkFenix
Caldari Evolution Band of Brothers
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:35:00 -
[14]
Edited by: DarkFenix on 24/01/2007 11:31:21
Originally by: Apocryphai The Impenetrable Accent Man Has an accent so extreme that nobody, from anywhere, can understand a word he says. Applies to anyone from any country except your own of course.
A slight variant on the Impenetrable Accent Man;
The Mumbler The idea of talking clearly is completely lost on him. Each word trails into the next, he can speak in excess of 200 words per minute, and he often compounds the problem by speaking quietly. Completely incomprehensible to people in his own country, let alone foreigners not so fluent in the relevant language. Generally possible to make the mumbler stop mumbling by shouting obscenities at them for >10 minutes (interspersed with demands they speak up).
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ToxicFire
Phoenix Knights
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:50:00 -
[15]
Brilliant Thread man, made me laugh randomly outloud in the labs leading to everyone stareing at me :)
Join the save Stargate SG1 Campaign Today! http://savestargatesg1.com/
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Inen
Minmatar OLE Mining Corp Miners With Attitude
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:57:00 -
[16]
THE GIRL Rumored to exist, have yet to encouter one. Legend says her voice is better than her looks. If you are a sailor, you may also know them as sirens.
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NereSky
Gallente Rage of Angels Morsus Mihi
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:57:00 -
[17]
Family Man; You can hear kids screaming in background while hes talking and/or his wife/partner bending his ear about ignoring the family and playing Eve.
sexual inuendo man. every other word espcially with females in voice comes has inuendo's or doble entrer's every other sentence
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Rule2k
Fate.
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Posted - 2007.01.24 11:59:00 -
[18]
The Chav
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Sokratesz
Guardians of Hell's Gate Tactical Narcotics Team
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Posted - 2007.01.24 12:07:00 -
[19]
Oh, the chronicles of TS. I love it.
Basilisk Fitting Link |
Damien Smith
Turbulent Anarchy Empire
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Posted - 2007.01.24 12:07:00 -
[20]
Originally by: Rule2k The Chav
Yep, we have one of them, innit ----------- Join channel 'Turby' or die! (bring pie) I <3 carebears on toast ^^ - Xorus I'll trade you some carebears for some sheep -Tirg
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MIGHTYDWC
Gallente Eternity INC. Mercenary Coalition
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Posted - 2007.01.24 12:40:00 -
[21]
The Borrower In the mist of heavy fighting, where TS silence is critical, this guy, thinking the silence is because everyone is asleep or looking and pron, comes in and ask "Does anyone have a ....(insert ship/moduale/isk/exoctic dancer)"
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Xeaon
Minmatar Disturbance Inc.
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Posted - 2007.01.24 13:08:00 -
[22]
Great thread
I qualify for the mumbler and partially for the panic fella, even though i'm fine when the fight actually starts, i'm very jumpy while we're waiting ------------
Originally by: Righteous Fury
Eve is not about the old preying on the new, its about the smart preying on the utterly incompetent.
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hotgirl933
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Posted - 2007.01.24 13:12:00 -
[23]
deaf man - cant hear or say anything but is on ts anyway
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Rex Everything
Brotherhood of Eternal Love
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Posted - 2007.01.24 13:21:00 -
[24]
Edited by: Rex Everything on 24/01/2007 13:19:40 The Forgot-To-Turn-Vent Off Before Watching 'Grumble Flicks' Man
Not an eve experience but from my TFC days, was still on vent after a game, most people had left chan/gone afk, few of us still left. The guy must of had his headset round his neck or something, and decided to extract a cheeky dollop of baby gravy, as all we heard was the fap-fap-fapping, with accompanying groans, for the next three minutes. Naturally, he was named and shamed at an appropriate lan party later ;-)
Edit for profanity filter!
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Terrak2
E.V.I.L
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Posted - 2007.01.24 13:48:00 -
[25]
using Vent instead of Team**** solves most of those problems.
I'm hard to come by like a straight guy workin' at Starbucks.
E.V.I.L Corp Recruiting |
Twilight Moon
Minmatar Malicious Intentions
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Posted - 2007.01.24 13:59:00 -
[26]
Edited by: Twilight Moon on 24/01/2007 13:56:14
Originally by: Terrak2 using Vent instead of Team**** solves most of those problems.
and just for you:
The Voice Comms Fanboi
Seemingly never satisfied with whatever voice communications program he is on, this particular fellow will constantly berate the other voice comms users as to how his usually soft tones are being made to sound like a cat being strangled by the poor sound quality. Eventually you might give in and switch to the voice comm program he reccommends just to get him to shut up, but really, don't bother, he'll never be satisfied, and will generally instead end up whining about something else, such as lack of features.
In short, ban him from comms, and kick from corp asap.
Originally by: Tisanta i cry when i read your sig...
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Xeaon
Minmatar Disturbance Inc.
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Posted - 2007.01.24 14:01:00 -
[27]
Vent is a lot better though to be fair ------------
Originally by: Righteous Fury
Eve is not about the old preying on the new, its about the smart preying on the utterly incompetent.
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DarkFenix
Caldari Evolution Band of Brothers
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Posted - 2007.01.24 14:05:00 -
[28]
Mr "AFK" Mr AFK logs onto teamspeak, but goes straight into an AFK or listening to music channel (or any other generic non-chat based channel). He proceeds to sit there for the next 8 hours, never leaving his channel. He then logs off again, having not said a word to anyone or even entered a remotely populated channel.
Broken Mic Man Broken Mic Man can never quite seem to get his microphone working properly, despite the fact that you've walked him through his mic setup 9 times before and repeatedly advised him not to get a ú1 mic from Tesco. His technical problems result in him alternating between Loud As Sh*t Man, Body Noise Man, Lives in a Can Man and The Hoarse Whisperer.
The Incredible Sulk The Incredible Sulk is usually a kid (though not always) who apparently gets his way too much in real life. He will incessantly drone on as if he knows best, and immediately throws a tantrum, then quits or moves to an AFK channel if he is told anything he doesn't like to hear. Him being told things he doesn't like to hear is of course a common occurance, because he is a complete f***wit who doesn't know the first thing about Eve.
The Knowitall Generally an elder variant of The Incredible Sulk, The Knowitall basically knows it all (or so he would have us believe). He has been playing Eve since 2001, has been playing MMO's since before Jesus was born, and has more programming talent than all the world's developers combined. As such his word is law on all matters, no matter what they are. Anyone disagreeing with him is wrong, idiotic, immature, or some combination of the three.
The Inquisitive Newbie The Inquisitive Newbie means well. He really does. He was told to ask any questions when he joined the corp, but nobody really counted on the sheer number of questions he would have. 90% of them are questions that he could figure out the answers to if he just thought about it, but he insists on asking. Even worse if they combine this trait with...
The Squeaker We all have one on our local TS, the pre-pubescent boys with the high-pitched voice. Squeakers aren't necessarily irritating, but when they are hybrids with other TS species such as Loud As Sh*t Man, The Talks Too Damn Much Man, or The Inquisitive Newbie, their voices have been known to induce severe migranes, and in worst cases death.
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Cabadrin
Caldari Sharks With Frickin' Laser Beams Mercenary Coalition
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Posted - 2007.01.24 14:06:00 -
[29]
The Clueless Scout
-Insists on reporting every little thing that shows up, even if it's a fly on his monitor. -Can't tell the difference between a shuttle a battleship. -"Hey guys some guys just showed up somewhere." -Either gently told he sucks, or is forcefully moved to another channel to talk to him/herself. _______________________________________________
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Alski
Gallente Di-Tron Heavy Industries Freelancer Alliance
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Posted - 2007.01.24 14:11:00 -
[30]
Edited by: Alski on 24/01/2007 14:12:08 Definitely missing these ones...
The Shy Guy. Has a headset, and Never says a word, will sit listening intently while coming up with all manner of plans showing absolutely insane tactical genius, but at best only passing them on though gangchat, more likely just preferring to rant in corp chat about how the current plan has us all doomed. Will perhaps speak once in a blue moon when given scout duty, and then sink back into obscurity when someone asks “who the **** was that?” (this is me btw )
The Silent Commander The fleet commander / gang leader who seems 100% on the ball, the guy knows his stuff, he talks with confidence and inspires the troops to believe we can win this one. The moment everything on your overview turns flashing red the Silent Commander go's... Silent, the rest of the battle has every man and his dog calling primary targets and usually ends with someone in a T1 frigate telling everyone to warp out. The Silent Commander will return shortly after this and dissect the battle module by module, ship by ship in an attempt to find out what went wrong. The Silent Commander may well use PPT, and in the excitement of battle totally forgets to use it.
The Overconfident Guy. This guy will bring his most expensive, most T2 fitted and most prised ship into battle and will start off as the guy on TS who is soooooo confident of us beating the enemy.... right up until the point at which he gets called primary, the rest of the battle is usually lost because no-one can hear the fleet commander over Overconfident guys yelling of “GET HIM OFF MEEEE!! TAKE HIM DOWNNNN!!! ********ING HELPPPP MEEEEE” Overconfident guy usually becomes very quiet after battle but can be later identified by searching killboards for Vindicators, Machariels and the like.
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