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Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 9 post(s) |
INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.08.23 03:42:00 -
[571]
Southern Blues
As I sat and learned the shocking past events of the tumultuous South, a deep and fundamental understanding of the richness of the EVE universe hit me, in a manner not entirely dissimilar to being forcefully struck by a "turkey slap". The EVE universe was a living breathing organ and it was "in your face"....
Apparently, back in January of this year, a group called G and a group called IRON had joined together and had brutally launched an attack on ASCN in an attempt to seize one of their stations.
Link
At this point, I stopped listening to the story for a second because I realised that I had not yet googled my hosts, to find out who they really were:
A quick search on Google revealed that ASCN were the:
American Society for Clinical Nutrition...
I considered this to be a worthy and lofty organisation, whose work, in direct contrast to the waistlines of many US citizens, was in desperate need of spreading. I made a note of this information as I was sure that it would prove to be invaluable later on.
I was further instructed that the seventh letter of the alphabet had disbanded some time afterwards and had founded the cult of Emilio. It would seem that Charlie Sheen's brother had had his hand further back in the deep and mysterious history of EVE than I had previously realised.
Link
Apparently, the attack on the anti-hamburger brigade had taken place because G/IRON had previously launched an unexpected assault on STAIN alliance (I was too terrified to google this) and had brutally crushed them within a week.
My hosts informed me that this was a truly shocking event, as STAIN had been the biggest alliance in the game at the time. Spurred on by this glorious victory, G/IRON had marched further south in a militaristic conquest of grand designs and had launched a series of deadly attacks on the hot-dog haters.
However, these attacks were ultimately destined to fail...
Link
The fascinating thing about this conversation was that I was beginning to develop an understanding of the nuances and complexities that underpinned the politics of the game.
It was then that I was informed of how the betrayal had occurred:
Link
It would appear, if the words of these people were to be taken at face value, that the cult of emilio had ruthlessly and bitterly fired upon these dieticians whilst "being blue" to them. In other words, they had used one of the oldest military tricks in the book and had become friends with someone, only to then attack them, once their defences had dropped.
A shocking tactic that most would agree is either:
A) An abhorrable abomination of the most fundamental kind, exhibiting a total lack of ethics, morality and respect for human life and shunning all decency.
OR
b) Brilliant.
I was intrigued by this but was also mindful that I was only hearing one side of this story. My corporation INNOMINATE NEUTRALITY had proudly declared itself to be neutral in all 0.0 regions, so I made sure not to make a judgement on this matter until I had heard the other side of the story.
I made a note in my journal to ask D2 about it when I returned to the north. Perhaps I would contact Satan for his infernal perspective on the matter.
The next morning, despite the assurances of my hosts that nobody would harm me during my visit, I discovered that I was actually about as safe as a guest on the Jerry Springer show when the guards and bouncers were unexpectedly taking the day off.
In a completely unprovoked and merciless assault, I found myself being shockingly attacked by none other than a member of ASCN.....
(to be continued...)
The 0.0 Experiment
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Gjs312
Caldari
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Posted - 2006.08.23 04:18:00 -
[572]
Whoo, first post. Great show so far Innominate, keep up the good work.
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Kai Lae
Gallente Shiva Morsus Mihi
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Posted - 2006.08.23 04:46:00 -
[573]
I wouldn't ask Satan for information, considering he's a member of burn eden and therefore may or may not be a good source of information :)
Raptor and Ares Fix |
Anemus Thuella
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Posted - 2006.08.23 06:44:00 -
[574]
Love this thread, helped me through patch day. As a newb I'm greatly inspired by your writing although I'll go a more traditional route myself PvP-Uni with Agony and then a nice 0.0 newbie-corp or a corp with 0.0 ambition.
Cheers mate and thanks for the read
*Bump* No second page for you I'll add my vote to the stickie-thing
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Amarria Lightwielder
N.A.G.A Corporation
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Posted - 2006.08.23 08:30:00 -
[575]
this topic is just class. Keep going friend! :)
NAGA ShopÖ
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Oresome
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Posted - 2006.08.23 08:59:00 -
[576]
Originally by: Anemus Thuella Love this thread, helped me through patch day. As a newb I'm greatly inspired by your writing although I'll go a more traditional route myself PvP-Uni with Agony and then a nice 0.0 newbie-corp or a corp with 0.0 ambition.
Cheers mate and thanks for the read
*Bump* No second page for you I'll add my vote to the stickie-thing
I totally agree. This thread brightens my day & if it doesn't deserve a sticky, nothing does.
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Flea Deluxe
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Posted - 2006.08.23 10:51:00 -
[577]
Awesome stories, been following it since the start!
Sticky, you know you want to!
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Timon Sirii
Gallente North Star Networks Mercenary Coalition
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Posted - 2006.08.23 11:12:00 -
[578]
Just fantastic work!
Best Regards Timon
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Mynall
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Posted - 2006.08.23 12:48:00 -
[579]
Very entertaining.
Good luck on you travels.
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ShuPac the3rd
Confederation of Red Moon Ascendant Frontier
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Posted - 2006.08.23 14:04:00 -
[580]
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
A quick search on Google revealed that ASCN were the:
American Society for Clinical Nutrition...
/snip
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE Apparently, the attack on the anti-hamburger brigade .....
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Vanlade
Amarr Imperial Academy
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Posted - 2006.08.23 14:14:00 -
[581]
Originally by: Kai Lae I wouldn't ask Satan for information, considering he's a member of burn eden and therefore may or may not be a good source of information :)
He is speaking of Lou Cipher, not Satan from Burn Eden.
- Vanlade
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Iyanah
Minmatar
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Posted - 2006.08.23 15:06:00 -
[582]
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
In a completely unprovoked and merciless assault, I found myself being shockingly attacked by none other than a member of ASCN....
OMG! i've been reading this for a while, and i was aware of the warnings about thrilling content, but not about gripping cliff hangers!
however will he escape!? or more likely, where will he end up once he gets podded? ========================================== Iy |
Twilight Moon
Minmatar eXceed Inc. Ascendant Frontier
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Posted - 2006.08.23 15:28:00 -
[583]
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE In a completely unprovoked and merciless assault, I found myself being shockingly attacked by none other than a member of ASCN.....
Was it an attempt to let you feel what ASCN felt when G/Iron stabbed ASCN in the back?
...on the other hand using a banana might be a viable alternative.
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Kyo Makamoto
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Posted - 2006.08.23 17:13:00 -
[584]
Brilliant stuff. Back to the top with you.
I think he must be a big fan of Sherherezade. I guess we will be reading this for another 1001 installments, I know I will.
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Centurin
Sturmgrenadier Inc R i s e
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Posted - 2006.08.23 17:57:00 -
[585]
This thread should sooo be stickied. No idea why it hasn't been yet. ----------------------------------------------- "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" - Optimus Prime |
Henious
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Posted - 2006.08.23 18:04:00 -
[586]
WE want more this an awesome story! STICKY IT!
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mackem
Fusion Enterprises Ltd
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Posted - 2006.08.23 18:32:00 -
[587]
yer get the devs to sticky this,
oh and congrats on passing the 120k views
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Kiyirari
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Posted - 2006.08.23 18:37:00 -
[588]
Beautiful, i want your children
Revenge is my god and my guns are her angels |
INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.08.23 18:47:00 -
[589]
Replies 5
Originally by: EVILSATAN I love you.
I love you too, but I only have eyes for Lou....
Originally by: Mervent As a empire carebear, I was really interested to see if you were going to be able to do what most people who live in 0.0 space ask empire players to do. Get in a ship and move out there.
Hi Mervent, I have been able to try a few "normal activities" in 0.0 and will be posting about these shortly, which will help to give you an idea of how well a n00b can live out here.
Originally by: Kai Lee I'd like to thank Innominate for revealing the true nature of the Arrow Project to all. Now whenever I camp with them in local, I can entertain myself when there are no targets to kill by singing "Onward Christian Soldiers" which they find greatly...entertaining :)
Don't forget the one about singing Hosannah to the king of kings......
Originally by: Capt Harlock Innominate if you would like me to send you a tutorial on "scanner use a quick 5 minute guide" message me in game.
Amazingly, I have still not got around to using a scanner.
Originally by: FittyUK1 Mr NIGHTMARE, any chance of seeing a screenie of your "Places I have visited"? I think it would be interesting to see where you've been on your adventure.
I'm cheering you on all the way!
Hi Fitty, I tried to do this for you but was surpised to see that this feature is bugged. It does not highlight the visited systems at all. I asked another player to check his and he found that the same thing happened. I wonder if anyone else has experienced this problem.
Originally by: Sharmina You sound like an Aussie...are you?
No, but I have a great fondness for antipodeans and would love to go there one day to sit on the dunny whilst watching wombats and singing the theme tune to the classic aussie tv show "Neighbours."
Originally by: Wan Nathiil I am wondering if that "alt spy" is the alt charachter or if it's the main?
From what I could gather, FinnishMonkeyLover was the alt. He also informed me that all his enemies knew who he was......
Originally by: ShuPac the3rd Man! It was my privilege to met you in EVE!
Beside that you really surprised me with knowledge of few words of my mother tongue!!!!
It was very nice to meet you too, ShuPac. I hope your daughter has given you control of your computer again...
Originally by: Framolia Surely if this is to be a true voyage of discovery, then ...(your)... fate should be the same as someone not posting a story like this in the forums.
Hi Framolia, The only rule I set at the outset was that I cannot go into a system higher than 0.4 security. Anything else that happens is all part of the fun and adventure, whatever it may be. There is no rigid structure for how this develops and that's why I'm enjoying it so much.
Originally by: Wan Nathiil
Besides, even if he's journey has changed, it's the unpredictable nature of INNOMINATE that makes this adventure cool. You never know when he's gonna say: Hey screw this, i'll go in a completely different direction and war deck ASCN
Now there's an idea.......
Originally by: Chiron Typhon being famous, he's the Paris Hilton crossed with Ernest Hemingway of EVE and it's great.
LOL!
Originally by: E'Veel P'Tiga Well after spending a few hours reading through this entire thread all I can say is I have never laughed so hard in my life...well...except that time I watched a George Carlin DVD on acid with a few buddies, many years ago.
A shocking revelation of the highest order. I may also need to take some before sitting down to watch Young Guns and Freejack....
Originally by: ShadowBank The speed of your actions has a greater effect than the actions themselves.
You have revealed one of the great secrets of life in that statement. The most successful people in history were those who made decisions quickly and were slow to change their minds.
(to be continued...)
The 0.0 Experiment
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INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
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Posted - 2006.08.23 19:52:00 -
[590]
Replies 6
Originally by: Krav I'm being inspired by it to return to writing short stories for fun, perhaps make one for eve, I dunno I'd be so embarrassed if ppl didn't like it.
If you do not try, you will never know. My advice is to believe in yourself and do it anyway. You never know what you may discover.
Originally by: chedburn When does the movie come out?
Next September....
Originally by: Serkis Can¦t wait for your adventures to be published in a hard cover
This will happen next October, to capitalise on the movie launch... I will also be signing an exclusive merchandising contract with McDonalds to include cheap plastic replicas of my caldari shuttle in their "Happy Meals"......
Originally by: Zippy Pinno I like it more when you get brutally podded.
I am glad that you gain enjoyment from my death.
Originally by: Pardack The latest edition had me referencing dictionary.com for vol-au-vents, Cote D'Azur and ylang-ylang
Now that you've done that, you can go and look up Syzygy, Zymurgy and Xystus.......
Originally by: 343GuiltySpark Know what fun? Read this using the Gizoogle site
I followed this link and translated CNN's main news page using it. It had me laughing extensively.
Originally by: Amplify Dang, i had hoped the pictures of the capital ship parade would have been full sized.
Hi Amplify, here are some much bigger pictures of some of the ships, especially for you:
Link 1
Link 2
Link 3
Link 4
Link 5
Link 6
They were a truly wondrous sight to see for the first time.
Originally by: Smagd Yes, yes, but how's the drinks? And don't tell me you couldn't get them to open the special barrel.
They are clearly keeping this special barrel from me for some reason. I will demand to know why, with vim, gusto, and fervent authority.
Originally by: Morvic Garr It almost reminds me of the writing style of Douglas Adams. Looking forward to your updates.
After reading all five books in the hitchhikers series I instantly fell in love with them. For those who do not know, Douglas unexpectedly died not too long ago. He will be truly missed by many.
Although I have to add that his PC Game Starship Titanic was rubbish....
Originally by: Iyanah OMG! i've been reading this for a while, and i was aware of the warnings about thrilling content, but not about gripping cliff hangers!
There is nothing more entertaining than gripping the edge of a cliff and hanging for a while.
Originally by: Kyo Makamoto
I think he must be a big fan of Sherherezade. I guess we will be reading this for another 1001 installments, I know I will.
A quick search on Google revealed that "shehezerade" were the producers of an Adult DVD entitled "Buttman In Barcelona".....
(to be continued...)
The 0.0 Experiment
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Raider Zero
Minmatar Federation
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Posted - 2006.08.23 20:22:00 -
[591]
Reading this is like reading Bill Bryson in space. If anybody else wants to try to read some print literature for a change, that is.
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Brunswick2
the Organ Grinder and Company Ascendant Frontier
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Posted - 2006.08.24 01:47:00 -
[592]
Whats this doing on the second page? Heh, guess what that moros (in the screenshot) was shooting at..
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francess drake
Shinra Lotka Volterra
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Posted - 2006.08.24 06:51:00 -
[593]
Bump
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s00zster
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Posted - 2006.08.24 12:44:00 -
[594]
Bah! Back to Page 1 with you!
Someone sticky this please!
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Lucre
STK Scientific Ascendant Frontier
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Posted - 2006.08.24 13:15:00 -
[595]
Originally by: Iyanah
Originally by: INNOMINATE NIGHTMARE
In a completely unprovoked and merciless assault, I found myself being shockingly attacked by none other than a member of ASCN....
OMG! i've been reading this for a while, and i was aware of the warnings about thrilling content, but not about gripping cliff hangers!
It's a not a cliff-hanger for us as our corp mate told us what happened - OTOH it makes us all the more impatient to see this harrowing tale appear from IN's perspective...
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Mistica
Caldari Oxide Academy O X I D E
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Posted - 2006.08.24 15:03:00 -
[596]
What a cool thread this is.. Reading with a lot of smiles!! good one!! ----------------------------------------------
Dream As You Will Live Forever... Live As You Will Die Today!!! :D |
implanted
Caldari MAJORITY O X I D E
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Posted - 2006.08.24 16:40:00 -
[597]
Edited by: implanted on 24/08/2006 16:40:09 We the undersigned require this post to be "sticky"... It deserves nothing else than FRONT PAGE COVERAGE
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Solan
Dreamscape
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Posted - 2006.08.24 16:53:00 -
[598]
I am merely bumping this diamond of a thread straight to the top of the news feeds.
-Solan
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Pinetoast Shadowberry
Antares Fleet Yards
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Posted - 2006.08.24 17:35:00 -
[599]
I'll be passing a plate of fresh brownies to you shortly, with milk. You've earned it.
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DOGNOSH
Minmatar SKULLDOGS
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Posted - 2006.08.24 17:40:00 -
[600]
your writing style reminds me of harry harrison,well done innominate
========================================== stop moaning,give CCP a break
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